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if you don't like bad words you cannot play [[this fuckin game!!!!]]
<<set $b_intro to false>>
<<set $r_intro to false>>
<<set $e_intro to false>>
<<cacheaudio "scream" "scream.mp3" "scream.ogg">>
<<cacheaudio "crash" "crash.mp3" "crash.ogg">>
<<cacheaudio "demon" "demon.mp3" "demon.ogg">>thanks, now let's start [[the show.|name1]][img[images/name]]your name is [[Tom|start][$name to "Tom"]] [[?|name2]]uhhhhhh, [[Michael|start][$name to "Michael"]] [[?|name3]]come on, [[Kevin|start][$name to "Kevin"]] [[.|name4]]you're breaking my balls here, [[Rory|start][$name to "Rory"]] [[.|name1]]alright, your name is $name, and you're currently:
[[sittin on a couch|sit1][$chair to false]]
[[sittin on a chair|sit2][$chair to true]]<<set $house_image to "images/sit2.png">>
[img[images/sit2.png]]
you're sitting on a chair. a BEAN BAG cair, to be exact. the right to do so, you won by beating eric at a game of pool. boy, was he mad.
man, [[this place is sweet|house intro]].<<set $house_image to "images/sit1.png">>
[img[images/sit1.png]]
you're sitting on the couch. eric's couch, right next to reginald.
man, [[this place is sweet|house intro]].MC:
Brandon:
One who used the drug. Laid back, easy going.
"Bro, you're overthinking this."
"Hey, um, wanna slow down a bit?"
Eric:
Angry and excitable. Owner of the house.
"What the fuck are you talking about?"
"Oh really, ME?"
Reginald:
A bit of a weirdo. Surprisingly naive
"Man, fuck off."
"If you say so."
"Yeah... just, uh, gimme a few."[img[$house_image]]
you're currently in ERIC'S HOUSE. you and reginald live here too, but eric's lived here for like two years before the both of you, so everyone just calls it eric's house.
<<if not $r_intro>>[[reginald|regi1][$r_intro to true]]<<else>>reginald<</if>> sits in his normal spot on the corner couch,
and <<if not $b_intro>>[[brandon|brandon1][$b_intro to true]]<<else>>brandon<</if>> lies half conscious on the other couch.
<<if not $e_intro>><<if not $chair>>[[eric|eric1][$e_intro to true]] is sitting on his coveted bean bag.<<else>>[[eric|eric2][$e_intro to true]] is sitting on the couch, next to reginald.<</if>><<else>><<if not $chair>>eric is sitting on his coveted bean bag.<<else>>eric is sitting on the couch, next to reginald.<</if>><</if>>
<<if $r_intro and $e_intro and $b_intro>>eric pipes up: "Man, I'm fucking sick of [[this|tv]]."<</if>>[img[images/brandon1.png]]
brandon's a frequent guest to eric's house. might as well be the fourth housemate. you forget what he does for work, but he doesn't look like he'd remember either.
he's laying on the couch and looks fuckin shunked out of his mind. just staring at the wall. whatever he's on
[[you'd rather not know|drug1][$drug to 1]]
[[you can't affford to know|drug2][$drug to 2]][img[images/reginald1.png]]
reginald. sittin in his spot. staring at his phone. you and eric have known him for a while. you guess he's a bit weird, but you can't really put your finger on why.
he doesn't like, do anything of note. but, he's nice enough and doesn't cause problems. he can be funny, sometimes? wow, you just realized you don't think about reginald too often.
[[back to the boys|house intro]][img[images/eric2.png]]
eric, de facto 'owner' of the house. the landlord's a friend of his family, so he got the place at a discount. the original roommates are long gone, you didn't know them too well.
eric's sitting in his favorite bean bag, staring at the tv intently. he looks a bit miffed, something that's not too uncommon.
[[back to the boys|house intro]][img[images/eric1.png]]
eric, de facto 'owner' of the house. the landlord's a friend of his family, so he got the place at a discount. the original roommates are long gone, you didn't know them too well.
eric's sitting on the couch, staring at the tv intently. he looks a bit miffed, something that's not too uncommon. it also doesnt help that you're in his favorite bean bag.
[[back to the boys|house intro]][img[images/brandon1.png]]
you're not one for mind-altering substances, maybe a drink here and there. whatever brandon's on, he can keep for himself. he's not exactly looking too responsive right now.
[[back to the boys|house intro]][img[images/brandon1.png]]
you occaisonally take up brandon's offer of dubious substances. but, unfortunately, you're not super stable in the financial department. and brandon has a strict no sharing policy; he doesn't give or take for free.
he follows that rule for drugs and fast food, but not much else.
[[back to the boys|house intro]][img[images/ripcity1.png]]
"Huh?" you ask.
"This bullshit, what is this?" eric says, gesturing to the TV.
"What's the matter, you don't like Rip City?" reginald says, still looking down at his phone.
[[it's something pretty dumb|tvdumb]]
[[it's something pretty cool|tvcool]]
[[you have no idea what this is|tvidk]][img[images/ripcity2.png]]
You're not a big fan of Rip City, either. It's about this tattooed guy, driving around his 'tattooed' car, saving the city from bombs or terrorists or something. it's good noise, but you can't imagine being a die hard fan of it.
"I'm changing the channel. You're not even watching it." eric grumbles.
"Hey, I'm watching it!" reginald says, still looking down.
"Bullshit." reginald aims the remote and [[changes the channel|tv2]].[img[images/ripcity2.png]]
eric's out of his mind. Rip City rules. It's about this badass, Ripicus, who loves tatoos and his car. He has to save the city from a bunch of guys who steal people's skin.
"How does he tattoo his car? What, is it just paint?" eric asked, brow furrowed.
"Yeah, it's just paint. But he paints copies of his tattoos onto his car." reginald says
"Why." eric doesn't ask so much as he states.
"Eric, he loves tattoos! That's all there is to it!" you say.
"I'm gonna goddamn scream if I hear 'tattoos' one more time."
Ripicus gets shot in the gut and yells out "AH, MY TATTOO."
"I'm changing the channel." eric [[changes the channel|tv2]][img[images/ripcity2.png]]
you've been staring at your phone for the past two hours. you don't know what Rip City is. There's this big guy in a car, and he's covered in tattoos and his car has tattoos also?
"I fucking hate this." eric says again.
"Don't you have the remote?" you ask.
"Damn right, I do" eric [[changes the channel|tv2]].[img[images/brandon2.png]]
as eric flips through the channels you hear brandon whisper something.
"What'd you say, Brandon?"
he looks at you with the dryest eyes you've ever seen: "[[I'm so hungry.|hungry]]"reginald looks up from his phone, "Oh, I haven't eaten since like, 9 AM. We should order something."
"Oh, yes." brandon says, returning to staring at the ceiling.
"What do you guys feel like?" you ask
"More like what's gonna be open. It's like eleven, right?" eric asks, still flipping through channels.
"It's like 12:30," you correct him.
"What the fuck, how long is Rip City?" eric says, grimacing and getting worked up again.
"That Chinese place is open for another half hour." reginald says, with some urgency. "They don't deliver this late, but we could totally make it."
[[you want some chinese][$food to "chinese"]]
[[nah, you're feeling some pizza][$food to "pizza"]]
[[chicken! chicken! chicken!][$food to "chicken"]]
"I'll jump in on that." you say.
"Oh yes." reginald says, about to dial. What does everyone want?
"Someone read me the menu" brandon mutters
"hey, hey, we've had Chinese like 3 times this week." eric complains
"Yeah, because it's good." reginald says. You can hear his phone ringing. "Oh, hello? Yeah, I'd like to put in an order, just one sec, alright?" he mutes his phone. "It's do or die, you all [[gotta decide right now.|scream]]""We're not gonna make it. How about pizza?" you suggest.
"I'm down for that." eric says, "you want pizza Brandon?"
Brandon growls sadly.
"Sounds like pizza, to me." reginald says.
"How about Tommy's? They deliver [[pretty quickly.|scream]]""ChickenTown! I want some chicken!" you say, like a child. "Chicken!"
reginald leans over to brandon, "You want ChickenTown, [[Brandon?|c_ask]]"<<audio "scream" play>>[img[images/scream.png]]
Brandon is [[screaming|scream2]] now.Brandon does not move.
"You gotta break our tie, Eric." You say. "Break it for chicken."
reginald: "Do not do that."
eric: "I'm getting sick of Chinese. Let's [[do ChickenTown|scream]]."[img[images/head1.png]]
Oh fuck what is [[that]].[img[images/head2.png]]
Oh SHIT IT'S [[OUT]].[img[images/head3.png]]
OH [[FUCK]] HERE IT COMES[img[images/head4.png]]
OW, SHIT you fell down-- you GOTTA DO SOMETHING
<<if not $scream>>START [[SCREAMING][$scream to true]]<<else>><s>START SCREAMING</s><</if>>
START [[SWINGING][$dead to true]]
START [[SCRABBLING][$dead to false]][img[images/punch1.png]]
you start throwin fists. the thing shrieks louder as your knuckles crash into it. its skin feels like sandpaper slathered with jelly.
ow, ow, FUCK ITS CLAWING YOU
[[grab his hands]]
[[keep swinging]][img[images/head4.png]]
My man, you <em>have</em> been screaming, and loud. so is this thing.
[[oops|FUCK]][img[images/yellow.png]]
you crawl backwards in an awkward crab-like shuffle. it almost feels natural. any movement would, if it resulted in you getting further away from this thing.
but conversely, the monster wants to get closer to you. it's crawling and scrawling, SHIT, your back hit the cabinet, [[oh no]][img[images/grab1.png]]
you grab his slimy wrists, and try to hold on as best you-- AHHHH HIS FEET ARE HANDS TOO
you THROW that bitch [[AWAY]][img[images/throw1.png]]
powered by adrenaline, your fists become rockets. you go numb to the cuts on your hands and arms, and just wail on the motherfucker.
eric, from your left, throws the tv remote at it. it catches both you and the monster off guard, and you both kinda look at him like "huh? is that best thing you could find?"
then reginald comes in with [[the lamp|lamp]][img[images/grab2.png]]
it hits the wall with a really fucking funny thud. if that were a person, you'd be laughing your ass off, but you're bleeding and in no mood.
eric's in the corner, by the tv, yelling "SHIT SHIT"
brandon somehow looks even more comatose
reginald is, oh shit he's got [[the lamp]][img[images/grab3.png]]
the lamp comes down FAST, right onto the fucker and brandon. the lightbulb pops. stunned, the monster rolls off of brandon and onto the floor. brandon kinda wheezes, you think?
reginald just starts [[stomping]] on it[img[images/stomp.png]]
he's going to town. you didn't notice until now, but reginald is wearing big fucking work boots. even though it's summer, and everyone is supposed to leave their shoes at the door.
purple juices and chunks come flying out of the beast. you hear eric retch.
[[you're gonna beef, too]]
[[no, no, you're good]][img[images/grab3.png]]
he smashes it with the lamp, then pulls back. the creature is clearly stunned.
[[he hits it again|lamp2]][img[images/throw2.png]]
the lamp's lightbulb shatters on impact. the creature falls to it's stomach.
reginald just starts [[stomping]] on ityou run to the trash can by the door. your group decided to keep it there, since brandon always comes in with fast food garbage. if he's not feelin too well, he would just leave it on the floor by the shoes.
wow, you're realizing brandon is the stem of a lot of bullshit in this house.
enough about all that though, you're busy [[making a mess of this can]]you're good. you can handle your shit. you just gotta look away, and cover your ears. for something so small, he is surprisingly <em>crunchy</em>.
oh man, it smells like [[hot dumpster]] now.when reginald's boot stops shaking the floorboards, you take [[a peek|glance]] behind youonce you're all done chucking your up, you risk [[a glance|glance]].[img[images/explain.png]]
reginald is standing over the monster's carcass, which he covered with a blanket. it's purple viscera seeps through, covering the rug and his right boot. his eyes are wide and his hands look a little shaky.
"I, uh, think your carpet's fucked, Eric." he says.
eric's staring at the deceased lump on the floor. he looks like he hasn't finished vomitting.
"Especially if the smell doesn't come out."
eric continues vomitting.
brandon drags himself into a sitting position, and clears his throat. he rasps: "You guys gotta fill me in here, I'm seein some [[grade-A bullshit]].""A fucking monster came out of your head." reginald says. <<if $dead>>"It's right there."<<else>>"It went into the bedrooms."<</if>>
"That [[actually happened]]?" brandon asks.[img[images/yank.png]]
the thing LUNGES for your head. eric YANKS your arm to side, pulling you away from [[the monster's path]].[img[images/stuck.png]]
<<audio "crash" play>>
right into the tv.
"IT'S FUCKIN STUCK!" eric screams, pointing.
he's [[right]].[img[images/run.png]]
it's stuck. and it's squirming.
"Get a net or something!" reginald says, frantically.
"I don't own a goddamn net, what the fuck are you talking about?" eric yells back
"Man, <em>or something</em>!" reginald screams as he runs into the kitchen. "Don't let it get out!"
"I'm not going near [[that|its out]]." eric says, backing up to brandon.[img[images/point.png]]
the thing writhes through the tv, and ends up behind it. all is still and the only sounds are yours and eric's heavy breathes.
brandon comes back with a broom and trash bag. "What the fuck, where'd it go?"
"[[It's behind the tv.]]"[img[images/lunge.png]]
uhhh, psyche, it ain't anymore. it comes flying out, screaming like tires on asphalt. you and eric weren't expecting it, you were both looking at reginald. reginald was expecting it the least, and it's flying right for him.
"[[SHIT|demon jump]]"[img[images/hit.png]]
reginald tries swinging his broom, but it gets caught up in the trashbag. it looks really stupid. like a flag bearer with a panic attack. amidst the swinging, you hear the all too familiar *CRACK* of broom against living being. seems like brandon hit the little fucker. it squeals, and runs off towards the bedrooms.
everyone just kind of stands there, tired, confused, and [[expectant]].[img[images/explain.png]]
"Uhhh," eric says instead of saying what he meant to say.
"I think we have to go get it" reginald responds.
brandon drags himself into a sitting position, and clears his throat. he rasps: "You guys gotta fill me in here, I'm seein some [[grade-A bullshit]].""Yes," eric says, starting to get mad.
"I'm not high right now?" brandon asks, then before anyone can get a chance to answer, "Wait, no, I am. But, it's fading. That shit really happened?"
<<if $dead>>"It's right fucking there, Reginald! Look! It doesn't matter if it was a monster or a goddamn raccoon, it came out of <em>your head</em>." eric says, full mad.<<else>>"It ate through the goddamn TV. I wish you dreamt my TV getting destroyed and a monster getting stuck in the house, but it really happened! It's <em>still</em> happening!" eric says, full mad.<</if>>
"You, uh, know why, Brandon?" reginald asks.
"[[I think so.]]""Ok, well I was buying weed off this guy."
"Did you know him?" eric asks
"No, Terry recommended him."
"You still talk to Terry?" brandon asks
"Yeah, he--"
"Is he still working at that shitty water park?"
"The monster! Get back to the monster!" eric yells.
"Ok, inside voice," brandon says, wincing at eric's screams. "and, I think it's actually a [[demon]]?""The guy offered me a pill, said it would... make demons and shit come out of my head." brandon says, bracing himself eric's rage.
"And you took it?" eric asks in utter disbelief.
"Well, yeah! I thought he being metaphorical!"
"Uh, [[when does it end?]]" reginald asks.[img[images/head5.png]]
Uh oh.
"It's fucking happening again."
[[Oh man]]."What do you mean? It's seems like the worst of it's over already."
"Did he say 'demons' like you did? As in multiple coming out?"
"I, uh... maybe? My memory's not exactly the sharpest, right now."
<<if $dead>>"Well, what are we going to do about this?" eric says, gesturing to the demon corpse.
"I think you should get a new carpet." reginald says.
"That's fucking expensive" eric sighs, "no, no, I mean THE DEMON! And the fact that there might be mor-- God damnit, you're tracking the blood everywhere! Take off your boots!"<<else>>
"Well, we gotta do something about the fucker in the bedrooms, first." eric says.
"I bet we could call animal control." reginald says. "Tell them it's a badger or something."
"If he gets killed we're gonna get fuckin arrested" you say.<</if>>
"Uhh, [[guys]]?" brandon says.[img[images/head6.png]]
Oh boy, this guy looks [[big]].[img[images/red1.png]]
"UUuuuurrrrrhhh" it groans as it finishes pulling itself out of brandon's head.
reginald has grabbed [[the lamp|lamp4]].[img[images/red2.png]]
"AH, FUCK. STOP, I'M [[COOL!]]"reginald stops, but keeps the lamp in a ready position.
"Ugghh," the demon examines himself and his surroundings. "UUUUGGGHHH, what IS this?"
"you cool, man?" brandon asks.
"This feels [[awful.|asks]]"the demon looks around at the four of you. you all look scared.
"Did you guys, uh, summon me or something?"
"I took a pill and guys like you keep coming out of my head." brandon says quickly and scared.
<<if $dead>>"That one on the floor is dead, I'm sorry if you liked him." reginald says, just as scared. still wielding the lamp.
The demon looks down at his fallen comrade. "Smells liks an asshole." He turns to brandon. "And you're a dumbass. Was he wearing [[a robe?]]"
<<else>>"There's one hiding in the house and all it did was scream and try to kill us" eric says, just as scared.
"Uh, I'll get to him in a minute." He turns to brandon. "You're a dumbass. Was he wearing [[a robe?]]"<</if>>
"I'm not going to kill you guys. But, man, it's been a while since I've been in a physical realm! For these cramps alone, I should be going hog-wild on you. Heh heh." No one else chuckles. "But for real, if any of this gets found out, we're all in deep shit."
<<if $dead>><<set $next_phase to "cleanup1">><<else>><<set $next_phase to "catch1">><</if>>
After a brief pause the demon says, alright. Let's [[fix this up|$next_phase]].
"Alright, so uh..."
[img[images/eyes.png]]
POWER shoots from his eyes, destroying the blanket, and the mushy remains beneath it. once his eyes return to normal, he motions to the stains in the carpet.
"you're gonna want to use bleach, or something. I don't know what you guys got up here."
he starts walking back [[towards brandon]].<<audio "demon" play>>he makes that sound.
the small demon comes scampering out into the living room, the moment it's visible, WHAMMO!
[img[images/eyes2.png]]
he gets zapped by eye beams. the beast EXPLODES in a burst of yellow ash, letting out a quick squeal before doing so.
"You're gonna want to vaccum that shit real good." the demon says. "The smell is gonna set in, real bad."
he starts walking back [[towards brandon]]."Yes." brandon replies, too afraid to blink.
"You took pills from a guy in robe?" eric says, confounded.
"Just one!" brandon says, "Please don't kill me."
"Did he say what it was called? The pill?"
"He just kind of growled at me when I asked." The demon nods a little, as if the situation is a bit clearer now.
"Yeah, that one's a bitch."
"Please do not [[kill me.]]" brandon says again.
"Wait, so you're just leaving?" brandon asks, "through my head?"
"Yeah, yeah. The jam's over in like an hour, shits resolved, I don't know what else you want from me, here."
"Wait," reginald chimes in, "are we good? like nothing else is gonna come out of brandon?"
The demon looks at brandon a little bit, "Yeah, as long as you don't take any demon shit anymore." he walks into brandon, and starts to fade away.
"Wait, you mean 'demon shit' like literal shit, or are you just using 'shit' as a generic term?"
Too late, brandon! [[he's gone]]!
<<if $food is "chinese">>the chinese place closed.<</if>> <<if $food is "chicken">>you guys ended up getting chicken.<<else>>you guys ended up getting pizza.<</if>>
it was good
the end, thanks