I’m not ready.
A thought that did the rounds more often than the nurses.
I was dying. In a sense we all are, we all do, but I was terminal. Death wasn’t swift, a messenger had been sent months in advance. I stewed in the foreboding of my own destruction. I thought in the time I had to process this fact I would find some acceptance or peace. No. From the smallest cells to my largest organs, death was refused. For each failing part another compensated. Mind and body united in a singular goal, survival.
I felt myself wince through the strain and sedatives, as I looked up at those around my deathbed. My family had taken turns to have their private moments, but they were all here now. The murmurs and occasional laughter to break the tension were like the angled sunlight from the window. It was warm, gentle and familiar. They had only meant to comfort me.
One had brought a trophy from some event from my youth I could no longer recall, another had read from some religious text they still held in their hands even now. A child, perhaps my niece or nephew, had brought in a potted plant, a chrysalis hanging from a stem. It had turned brown. A potential turned to rot.
Even if my lips weren’t so dry, and had my tongue not turned to sandpaper against the roof of my mouth, I wouldn’t have the heart to tell them it would never hatch. They might learn to measure time in tragedies, but there was no need to count the seconds so young. My lips threatened to split as I smiled knowing just how much life they had ahead.
I felt the downward pull on my eyelids and blinked. The edge of my vision darkened as my will lost the battle against my weakened body. I heard the tones of the heart monitor barely rise as I wondered if this was it. The end.
Waking, I found a strange clarity along with piercing chest pain. The glow from candlelight had replaced the brightness of day and the streaks of light through the blinds. My left arm ground itself against the sheets as I clutched the bony ridges above my heart. My own body felt unfamiliar, like an alien shell too small and hard to be my own human self.
The shadowy figures didn’t move, instead watching my shaking frame in silence. As my breath caught and I felt my body seize, there was something on my bed. My eyes blurred and refocussed until I saw it clearly. A photo album on its last page, there were three pictures with space for one more. Unfinished.
I don’t want to die. Someone…please.
As the thought was completed, I registered the warmth of a hand on my shoulder. It pulled me gingerly until I was laying flat on my back and facing the figures in my room. The pain in my body vanished and I saw the world again through healthy eyes, and it was wrong. It was not the stillness of the candle flames that alarmed me first. It was the frozen expressions of glee. Not all of them, there were others of sadness and concern, peripheral to the three who stood closest. I tried to close my eyes but they were as stiff as ice. As were my arms or legs, I was frozen in my final moment. Then the grip on my shoulder tightened.
“You. Are. Welcome.”
At the words I heard behind me my mind fell still.
‘Click.’
Suddenly the three faces before me became solemn, mournful. My body shook and I clutched the bed, but as I tried to turn my neck I found it was stopped by some unknown force.
“Uh-uh. No peeking, aren’t there enough questions dripping from your tongue?”
What’s going on? Am I dead? Why are..?
“Shh.”
It was like a gentle breeze, but it blew the thoughts right out of my mind.
“I heard you. You didn’t want to die and now you never will. It is so exciting, for me.”
Fear was the right response, I knew it, but I could not feel it. My whole body had that single dull sensation of fingers held too long in cold water. The same went for my mind, I was missing the chemistry for emotion. Its words held a threat that I could observe, it pulled at my awareness and became sure something terrible lay ahead.
Are you a genie? Can I make a different wish?
“No I am no genie, I don’t do three wishes, I make free wishes. They cost me nothing.”
I felt the start of a question in my mind, but it was swatted away like a fly, and like a fly it kept returning. The presence continued to keep it from landing with some psychic motion. I could feel the thought was there, but I could not hear it.
“Your kind does not make for good listeners. That is fine, you will listen now.”
As it talked I could feel myself pulled upward from the bed. It then moved me forward through the family who was closest to the bed.
“I believe Immortality is a personal affair, so what you decide will be completely out of my hands. You should be aware, where you go and what happens to you is not solely in yours.”
The door to my hospital room swung open and I floated out of the threshold. Spinning to look back I saw the whole doorframe gone. Then it hit, a backlog of thoughts rushed to be processed. I slumped against the wall and sat as a crowd of questions bid for my own attention. Then there was silence, utter and complete.
I covered my eyes and gently rubbed my face, just the motion felt calming. Then I heard it. At first it sounded like a soft rhythmic tapping, but as it got louder I realised those were no taps at all. They were footsteps. I stood and turned in their direction. Down the long hospital corridor was a figure walking almost casually, human shaped, but shape alone was no guarantee.
It was an ominous sight. Despite the square lights above, the corridor held a dark green tint and the reflective floor pooled like dark water. Then there was the one that approached out of that near endless stretch, single-mindedly and almost machine-like in its motion.
I could hear it, the urgency in their approach. The figure didn’t break into a run or even look to be approaching any quicker, but the pace of their steps told no lies. I began to make out their details, they were wearing the same medical gown as my own. What stood out more was the whites in their eyes, there was no question that their gaze was fixed in one place firmly, my own.
“Hey! Stop.”
They came to a stop instantly and put their hands up in a ‘no danger’ gesture.
“Just passin through buddy. Not lookin for trouble, although between you and I we’re already in a whole heap of it ain’t we.”
He put his arms down and began walking forward, but in those few steps closer I became sure of something terrifying. Below their eyes was neither a nose nor a mouth, just a smooth vacant area between the cheekbones and chin.
“No no wait. Wait!” I had to pause as I tried to think of what to do, part of me wanted to just start running, but who knew if the next thing I met would be so friendly. “What are you? You sound human, I’d say you look human too if it weren’t your face.”
This time he looked back before seeming to relax and then pointed at his own face, “Heh, why don’t you give your face a lil checkup there. Might just find you ain’t the pretty peach you think ya are.”
As soon as he said it I reached up, my fingers searched for the familiar shapes but it was smooth. It took a moment to process, the realization that my face was missing had me shaken. I blanked out and stared at my fingers for a time, then broke out when I saw the figure had closed the gap, standing just twenty paces away.
I took a step back, “What is happening to us?”
The figure shrugged, “Well from what I’ve put together, each of us that ended up here asked for something we didn’t understand, now we’re here. Immortality isn’t a simple thing, and I’d be a liar if I were to say I ain’t the teensiest bit scared about committing one way or the other.”
I continued to step back and they matched my pace, “I…I think I asked not to die, but that’s not the same as asking to be immortal.”
The figure shook their head, “Sounds like you’re splitting hairs there friend. Now let me give you some advice, you don’t want to be walking backwards through these hallways. Ya might find they have their own intentions.”
Just then I walked back into a crossroads, the path opened up on either side and in the corner of my eyes I could make out they were wider and brighter than the one we’d been walking down. My leg suddenly caught on something behind me, I twisted and tried to catch myself as I fell over a coffee table. I found myself bridging the gap between the table and one of the many chairs that sat against the wall of what seemed to be a waiting area. Neither the table nor chair moved a millimeter, as though they were bolted down to the floor.
Springing up I saw the figure was much closer now and moved to my left and angled myself to keep the stranger in sight as I stole a glance to see the plain beige walls down the corridor behind me.
“Gotta learn some lessons the hard way. Might not be a coffee table next time so do mind yourself.”
Once they reached the waiting area, they took a look down each of the brighter and fairly wide corridors before nodding to themselves.
“I don’t bite ya know, neither do you anymore in case ya hadn’t figured that out. I don’t think we could do any real damage to one another even if we tried. I get your skepticism, this is a weird as hell place to find yourself, but I know a thing or two having been here a while. Now I wouldn’t mind the company, it has been some time since the last wanderer I ran into. Or I can just mosey on down in this other direction. Whatcha think?”
[[Walk Together]]
[[Walk Alone]] It wasn’t a want, it was a need, I needed to see what other fates were here. I desperately wanted to find some clue to help me decide what I needed to do, it was becoming clear I didn’t want something else to decide it for me. So I continued to the next room.
Another empty bed, but this time surrounded by medical staff including a defibrillator pushing down on nothing. Not all good nights were so gentle.
I didn’t linger, my interest was more on how else eternity could look. I was a little surprised at how death was already becoming a little mundane, especially when compared to the few fates I’d seen. It may have been too early to assume, but maybe those from empty beds became trapped here. The thought was chilling, one wrong move and your fate could be sealed for eternity.
I pushed the thought down, panicking wasn’t a useful frame of mind. For now surviving was enough. I needed a cool head to make clear decisions, and right now gathering information was the goal.
Approaching the next window I stopped mid-stride, caught in awe. I could not describe the colors, they were new to me, but I picked up on the shapes, a large spiderweb structure surrounded by smaller versions breathing and turning like cog wheels. The window itself looked as though it were panning back as new shapes were introduced. It was hard to discern at first, but it formed into a 3D space.
The table in the centre became lucid enough for me to register first, then I realized those were no webs, but eyes, eyes that were looking at me. The shapes morphed further until I saw that there were three faces with bodies still tracing out of the lines. As they formed they seated themselves at the table, and seemed to be drinking tea and pointing at me.
Next the window pulsed inward and the shapes collapsed into a singular form. Then they waved, their eyes widened and pointed to the side with their hand extending to the end of the window pane.
I looked to my right and jumped back in horrible realization, there was no rubble in the corridor, this thing had just crept its way toward me slowly. Its lumpy greyish purple body was split downward like a sideways mouth. Countless ivory barbed tongues licked at the space I had just occupied. It was wriggling as if ready to pounce. I pushed back and back and back with my legs as it continued its pursuit. My right hand got stuck for a moment in the brown substance on the floor, forcing me to roll to avoid another flurry of lashing tongues.
I made it to my feet and sprinted down the corridor arriving quickly at the stairwell. Immediately I noticed there was no brown trail on the stairs, which did imply it doesn’t follow people down.
Whatever it was had now slowed down, and was edging closer with a strange caution. I moved myself over to the right and it adjusted itself now angling towards me. It had no eyes but the disgusting lump of flesh somehow knew where I was. As it got only two meters away, it began wriggling like before, I had to go now. I could run left, possibly get around it or it was time to go down the stairs.
[[Run past]]
[[Back Away Downstairs ]] I was in two minds about it. It seemed a little too convenient for this friendly ‘person’ to show up just as I arrived wherever this happened to be. For now I had a better chance of getting information out of them than the walls.
You can probably tell I don’t know what is going on. I would appreciate it if you could tell me about where we are and if we are in danger. We can walk and talk, you seem in a hurry.
The figure nodded along, I could tell their mood had changed, their eyes seemed a little brighter and their shoulders relaxed slightly, “Well I’m not in such a rush now. Just been running this maze of hallways a while. Let’s get going, better we take the left here. A morgue may sound sinister, but that nuthouse makes it look like a picnic.”
After having it pointed out, I noticed the sign hanging above me that read Asylum and stepped away from it and towards the Morgue. We ended up walking side by side as we both entered the new corridor and then they stuck their right hand towards me.
“I’m 3840 by the way, we go by our hospital rooms. I’ll fill you in later.”
I shook his hand, “I’m-” It took me a moment to search through my memories, I’d never seen it outside my room, only really hearing it from the nurses, “-103C I think.”
“Glad to meet you 103C, I’ll be sure to remember it. Now then listen carefully, this is one of the easiest rooms to get through but that doesn’t make it safe. Just stay on the path and follow me. You might see some things, you might hear some things. As long as you’re on the path, they’re just smoke and mirrors.”
I nodded and we came up to a corner. 3840 slid in front of me to take the lead, after making the turn I saw a much darker room filled with mist or smoke. There were two parallel lines on the ground that trailed off ahead.
“I’m back, just like I said I would be. I even brought a new friend this time. Take it easy on ‘em, will ya?” He called out stepping onto the path.
As 3840 continued to walk ahead, I could see him vanishing into the smoke, so I stepped onto the path. Just then I noticed the silhouettes of people approaching, three on my left and two on my right. They lunged forward and I saw them, faces rotten, skin peeling. I stepped back outside the room and they vanished back into the smoke. I also noticed 3840 was gone.
It’s just like a haunted house. At least that’s what I said to comfort myself. Nothing crossed onto the path, that rule so far had proven to be true. It was hard to trust. Harder when led into a room of undead, especially when they were greeted like old friends. Maybe they were. Maybe once you cross the line, you don’t get to cross back over.
I stepped back onto the path and kept my eyes down on the path. I heard a motor in the distance, unmistakably that of a car. I kept walking and heard it approaching. Then on my right, a yellow ambient light grows suddenly, it shapes into beams as the sound of a roaring engine gets closer and closer. They shake from side to side, I see the front, the wheels, it cuts through the smoke at high speed.
Instinct compels me to dodge, I jump forward on the path and I see it has just turned left. I’m on the edge. I catch myself and step back. The headlights vanish, I am standing alone, on the smokey path now moving left.
I close my eyes, I need to think, it was too close a call and it can’t happen again. I hear someone calling for help, I ignore it. I must focus. Whatever it is out there is smart, their timing is good, no it's almost perfect. Forget the illusions, I must keep my eyes on the lines and move forward.
Reopening my eyes I am crowded by the dead. I see their legs but don’t look up. I continue along the path as I know I should and the dead do not follow. I hear a scuffle and screaming on my right, it's far and outside the path so I try to block it out.
“103C! Help me, I tripped and they got a hold of my arm, don’t let ‘em take me.” 3840’s voice calls out.
I keep walking and he keeps calling out. I reach a bend and see the wall of the morgue for the first time, a wall of drawers, the type people are kept in. They’re all open and empty. I take the corner and I hear a sudden screech behind me, I jump up but make sure to stay on the spot. Then walk forward, but the screech doesn’t just continue, another voice joins, and then so do many more.
I take a knee as I feel razor sharp tongues digging in my ears. It's unbearable as though they are scraping the inside of my mind. I stand and move a bit faster, eyes locked on the path. The assault dies off and I hear 3840 struggling nearby. Turning another corner, I brace mentally for the next attack and sure enough I see something lunging for me, a ghostly figure with a dislocated jaw swipes at me. They seem to hit an invisible barrier but continue to desperately strike and again.
After stepping around the corner carefully, the straining sound of desperate grunts tell me I’m very close to 3840, it only takes a few steps forward to see them now. There’s a second branching path on the ground, but it’s an obvious fake as I see where it's cut off by the real one. Just off the curve where the two meet 3840 is being swarmed, he’s leaning back but three of those ghosts from earlier are pulling at him.
“Forget the fake path, just grab my back and pull me in.” I hear him say.
Then far away on my right I hear him say, “That’s not me kiddo, I’m over here.”
Another voice further ahead along the path calls out, “Leave him, that’s just a fake. Hurry now. I’m getting sick of waiting.”
I see more ghosts approaching the 3840 in front of me, his foot slips forward, it looks like they won’t last long, but I would have to reach outside the lines to pull him in.
[[Keep Walking]]
[[Reach Out]] “You seem nice enough but no. I’m fine, you just go on your way and I’ll go on mine.”
The figure gave a slow nod, their shoulders slumped a little and they began to back away, “Well okay, sure. Not a problem. No hard feelings or nothing.”
I watched him to make sure he was going, after a few steps they cast a look over their shoulder as they walked, “By the way, if it seems like a bad idea it probably is one, but sometimes all you’re left with is bad ideas. Good luck out there.”
After the figure got a good distance away I saw the signage hanging from the ceiling labeled ‘Morgue’ and felt a bit of relief. As I turned to make my own way down the other corridor, I saw the sign hanging just above me, ‘Asylum.’ I hated how quickly those parting words seemed to be proving true.
The smartest move I decided was to backtrack and go back down that darker lit corridor, but as I rounded the corner there was just a wall in its place. Running up to it I pressed against the wall, solid. Seamless. I felt as though I were going crazy, it had just been there.
I thought about running back after the figure, since they were strangely calm about our predicament. As I turned around it happened again, a new wall, an option gone. The only way left now was to go to the asylum. I was learning all too quickly this hospital doesn’t favor hesitation.
It was difficult to push onward, but I began to walk. It was empty, no doors or windows, just a corner in the distance and the sound of my footsteps to keep me company. As I was about to round the corner I heard the slap of flesh against a hard surface. Like a person falling onto concrete or stone. Pressing against the wall I slowly began to peek around the corner. From this angle I could only see a heavy metal door with a small square window. It was open.
Thud. From my blindspot around the corner I heard it. Not more than a metre away. I heard my single footstep before I realised I had moved back. A flash of white flew by and straight into the wall behind me. Another thud as it collided with the wall. Its movements had been silent, this bald straitjacketed person began to turn around. I thought it was trying to look at me until I saw its eyelids sewn shut. Then I heard it, not sounds a human would make, but it was screaming. The audio equivalent of scratching your own skin. I flinched and bent over clutching at my ears. As soon as I had moved the sound had stopped, it was no longer looking in my direction.
I watched it amble by, almost brushing against me, but I stood still as it walked further down from where I came. This time I was careful. I was gentle with each step. Around the corner I saw the corridor with the same heavy doors opened, three on the left side and two on the right. There were two more of the straitjacket wearers just ahead bumping between the doors, a whole crowd of them wandered around in the room behind them.
It became pretty clear what I needed to do, first was avoiding making noise and getting in their line of sight, the second was finding an exit. I crouched down and slowly made my way past the first open door. Looking inside I saw padded walls, but instead of a far wall was a corridor that looked identical to where I started, its lighting was just a bit darker.
There was a temptation to just go and leave this awful place, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that it was a trap. Movement in the corner of my eye made me look back as I saw one of the straitjackets heading my way. With a couple gentle steps I stood behind the closest door letting it pass and looked into the second room. This one had the same padded walls but led to a new corridor, brighter this time with a reception desk.
I decided to move up and get a better view of the larger room ahead. The last straitjacket nearby had walked behind the final door on the left. I didn’t like that I couldn’t see it. I had a feeling there would be no good surprises here. Edging my way forward I rounded the last door on the right side and very slowly craned my neck to look for it. Between its shoulder and neck it rubbed itself against the corner. It looked like an awkward armless hug, as if trying to gain comfort from a piece of architecture. I shook my head, I had better things to dwell on, like how to get out of here.
I took a quick look around to make sure this position was safe for the moment, seeing no imminent threats I turned my attention to the room ahead.
There were maybe thirty or more of the straitjackets, walking around in a controlled circle. Four headless men in white shirts and pants with batons were pushing them back into the strange spiral. There were five stragglers which had managed to slip out and they were aimlessly bouncing off the walls or walking in their own small circles. From my crouched position I couldn’t make out whether there was a corridor on the other side, but in the cell next to me I could see an open door that seemed to lead to a ward full of beds. I couldn’t just stand around. It was time to decide.
[[Enter Cell]]
[[Move Into The Room]] The chaos outside wasn’t worth the risk. I passed the straitjacket next to me and walked into the cell. I rushed forward as the ward got closer and closer, and just as I was beginning to feel a wave of relief I bumped into an invisible wall. I blinked and fell over, when I opened my eyes, there were no beds, no ward, just a soft padded wall. I scrambled back and shot up, turning around and heard a thud as my head collided with the glass window on the heavy metal door.
It had closed. In my panic I tried to fumble for a handle but found none.
“You’re a clumsy one. Maybe it’s all that vision getting in the way.”
I turned around slowly. It was no longer a padded cell. There were two of the headless baton wearers and a headless man in a lab coat standing around an operating table.
“We can fix that. Then you can join the choir outside. They sing so beautifully.”
My eyes frantically searched for an exit as the three of them rounded the table and made their approach. I saw the metallic glint of a needle in the doctor's hand but behind him on the other side of the room was a door. The first one made their move and charged with their baton out. I dodged left as they collided with the wall behind me. I took two steps and felt a heavy weight knock the leg out from under me which sent me flying to the floor. I scrambled up and managed to get my hand on the doorknob. Locked.
Grabbed from behind I was lifted up with my arms pinned to my side. I squirmed and kicked but I locked in tighter than a vice. Then I felt my legs grabbed as I was taken to the table and held down.
“Now now, just close your eyes. You’re in good hands.”
I saw the needle getting closer, then a gloved finger and thumb pinched my lids together. I couldn’t even feel the needle. I held my second eye shut and didn’t resist.
I felt myself heaved up, a jacket strapping my arms to my side, dragged along then thrown into a mess of bodies. I was screaming as different horrible sounds pierced my mind, each unique in its tone, its terror. Occasionally knocked back into the circle. Around and around, until I forgot the meaning of silence, and the music became sweet to me. The cells were too risky, maybe even too obvious a trap to take a chance on. I moved past the straitjacket on my left. It was a simple if not nervewracking experience. I walked into the room and stuck close to the walls on my right side. I heard a different flavor of the scream I’d heard before, more like a nail hammered into the top of my skull. It almost brought me to my knees, so I started moving faster and a little lower. Persevering, I gave the wandering straitjackets and baton wielders the distance I could.
I made it halfway around the swirling mass of straitjackets, I saw another set of open heavy doors opposite to where I’d entered from. I couldn’t see past them, but it looked clear for the moment. I clenched my fists and made a beeline for the exit. Just before entering the narrow passage I noticed there was a door and window on the left wall of the big room. A headless man in a doctor's jacket waved their arms as if composing music.
I wondered if, from where they stood, they were acting like some needle of a horrific record player. As the thought left my mind they seemed to stiffen and turned slightly in my direction. It was a subtle movement, and I froze hoping it was just my imagination, but it was not. With incredible speed the doctor disappeared and the door flung open. The whole room came to a halt.
That was more than enough of a signal for me to get going. I bolted and slammed straight into the first door, slamming it shut with a loud bang. My steps, far from silent, echoed down the passageway. As I passed second to last door one of the straitjackets lunged out from behind the final one. I dropped my shoulder and sent it flying back straight into the wall next to the corner ahead, and with no arms to protect it, the sound it made was like a crack of lightning. Curving around the bend I turned and caught a flash of white movement sprinting after me.
All I heard was two sets of steps as I dared not look back, the passageway became a beige blur and I turned corner after corner until I finally passed through a set of open double doors and turned to close them.
“Don’t go!” It shouted after me.
I slammed the doors shut and felt the doors shake violently once, I held the doors tight waiting for the coming assault, but there was not a single further sound of protest.
Holding it shut I looked around behind me, and I had never been so glad to see a quiet corridor. This time it looked endless, but not empty, every ten or so metres there was a closed door and a large window. On the ground was some sort of a trailing brown substance spread across a good portion of it.
As I held onto the door, I felt a sense of safety, of relief. It couldn’t last. My mind couldn’t ignore what I had just seen, what I had just experienced. Was this hell? Were those people in straitjackets just like me, but they didn’t make it through? I clung to the door tightly as the next terrible thought arrived, what if it’s not the worst one? Maybe there are no good versions of eternity. Then I stopped myself. No, that kind of thinking will only prevent me from finding out. It was too early to judge.
I finally let the doors go. Then I began putting some distance between it and myself, and found the brown residue on the floor was sticky. I’d almost fallen over on my first step, but quickly moved to the side of the trail. It was the first time I was thankful to not have a nose. The corridor was wide enough to drive a car through comfortably which was a welcome change.
Walking up to the first door I saw it had a room number 3502. I glanced into the window next to it and there was a woman, her arm outstretched onto the empty bed as if holding an invisible hand. She was as still as a statue, as was a curtain which hung unnaturally in the air next to an open window. Outside was pitch black darkness despite what clearly looked like a rectangular ray of sunlight stretching into the room and ambient glow.
I began to wonder if the bed’s former occupant wandered these halls like me, or if they had already been taken by some unfortunate fate like the straitjackets. The corridor stretched beyond my vision, just how many had been plucked like a ripe fruit in their final moments?
Shaking my head I moved on to the next room on this side of the brown trail. Door 43D. It was no surprise they weren’t consecutive, or even from the same hospital, perhaps there was no logic to their order.
I was confused at the sight within the next window. It looked like some abstract circular art piece full of changing patterns, I leaned forward against the glass cupping my hands to block the light. Suddenly my vision zoomed in, there was a ring around the center of it all, but it wasn’t a ring, it was a person. One long stretch of a person. Then I noticed the patterns were made of their routines. Tracing the ring from right to left I watched them go from a young man to older, the patterns were changing between their house, work, a bar and irregularities being the few other places they went.
I fast forwarded their life to the end, overshot it and saw them growing in the womb. I understood it then. A closed loop, the same life over and over. Pulling away from the window my mind reeled from the experience. I closed my eyes for a moment, just to feel the peace of nothingness. It was comforting, but upon reopening them I was unsure if I had lost track of time.
Looking around, the double doors were gone, in their place was a stairwell that I could see led downwards. I noticed the lights flicker every few seconds which wasn’t too inviting. On the other end of the corridor it no longer looked so endless. It almost looked like something had collapsed. I was curious about the other rooms, but now there was a way to leave.
[[Continue Looking]]
[[Go Down The stairs ]] I’m going down there.
3840 turned to me, a strange look in his eyes, “You’re kidding right, I’ll find your room in this hallway soon if you do.”
Maybe you will. If the place is that dangerous then there must be something worth guarding too. I get it sounds crazy, but we only get one chance, we can’t afford not to be bold.
3840 shook his head and took a step closer to the stairwell. He stared down into it for a while. I followed and stood shoulder to shoulder with him, and together we stood and watched the light flicker every now and then.
“I’ve thought about it, had too much damn time to think about it. You may have noticed the different rooms in this hallway. Most get an empty bed, which means the hospital got em first. I watched smart people, capable people, ones who had been here longer than me go down.” He paused, an expression in his eyes I almost couldn’t believe, they were so hateful, “The worst part is I understand, no one wants to be stuck here a thousand years, but it's better than forever.”
A solemn mood hung in the air. I didn’t know what to say and the moment was dragging into an awkward quiet.
Hey, whatever happens, I’m thankful I got to meet you. You helped me out before and I can tell even now, you’re doing your best to try to stop me from making a mistake. You’re a good soul.
I held out my hand and he took it. After shaking hands I saw him slide off and stop in front of one of the windows. Turning around I began to make my own way down. The grey concrete walls and flickering light gave me the impression of heading to a basement level. After reaching the landing between the two floors, I turned around and saw there were no longer any stairs up, just a plain concrete wall. I had been sealed off.
Each few seconds the light flickered and I was left in true darkness for a brief moment. My eyes darted around, expecting a change, anticipating a reason to run that didn’t come. I turned the corner and saw at the end of the set of stairs were two open doors. The lights flickered randomly and at a greater frequency in the next section. I was suddenly reminded of the morgue, I wondered if the hospital itself wanted me to be afraid. It was working.
I continued down slowly and quietly. This allowed me to hear the ringing of thin metal and the sound of sloshing water. From halfway down the stairs I detected movement, I crept further and saw a mop, a bucket and grey clothed legs. My muscles tensed as I got closer, I was ready to bolt at the drop of a hat.
I forced myself to edge forward and as my foot touched the last step I began quickly checking for danger. There were six janitors. Flash. Six eyeless faces had turned to me. The light held for a moment and they all stood unmoving. Flash. They had all looked away. They were human-shaped, but their stiff jointed positions resembled wooden drawing figures. The left side had been cleaned, the right had the same brown trail as the last corridor, in the middle was a blackish puddle.
I tried to step back, but I felt the concrete wall had kept pace with me, there was no back any longer. I felt the urge to run, but clenched my hands and tried to calm down. They had all shifted as they cleaned and there were now four of them on the right side of the corridor, so I decided I would move leftward.
The janitors on the left had a wide enough gap in the middle to run in between them. If I wanted to make a clean and fast getaway, that was the way through. Then I noticed the pattern of the closest worker, their mop always stopping in an arc at some point in the center or the side of the corridor. If I stuck to the wall and timed it right, I could slide past and get by untouched.
[[Run Past]]
[[Stick To The Wall]] If they only moved in the dark, then I should be able to outpace them. It was clear to me that speed was a credible solution. Their rigid mechanical movements didn’t project an image of dexterity. However, it was not them, but the light that did not inspire a lot of courage. It had no pattern, no rhythm, it flickered in completely random intervals. Should I enter the corridor only to find the light goes out for good, all I would have is a general direction and the best burst of speed that I could manage.
Then I remembered the brown trail. I could be running right towards another one of those creatures. Maybe something even worse. I shook off the thought. Safety was a concept for living, the dead were not afforded the luxury, at least not here. I’d have to deal with situations as they came, it had gotten me this far. Whatever would decide I was their next easy target, I would leave disappointed.
The black puddle in the middle was getting shorter and the janitors began to close the already uncomfortably small distance. I decided this was it. Both janitors brought their mops to the center of the corridor. My silent starting gun shot off with a flicker of light. I pushed off the starting line powerfully. On the second step I felt the cold puddle, but no traction. My balance wavered as I twisted my body. I slid straight into the janitor on the opposite side.
My body contorted as it made contact. I may as well have run into a stone pillar, it would have had about the same effect. It didn’t shift a millimeter, as if anchored by some otherworldly force. All the force of the collision seemed to bounce back onto me and I fell flat on my back into the black puddle.
Two faceless heads turned to me. Two wet mops rose through the flashing of lights and began closing in on me. I tried to get up. Scrambling in the puddle, I realized it may as well have been oil. Standing wasn’t an option. I tried to claw forward, then felt the soft wet weight of a mop push down on me. The second mop followed shortly after.
I felt the mops working, the understanding came quickly, one pinned down a limb while the other set to work. That did not deter me from trying, and at one point I felt both mops had freed me, but it was calculated. With a flick I was flipped over and they continued to perform their custodial surgery on me.
Face, chest, legs, then feet. Through my panic I saw it, the darkness of the black puddle was being washed out of my body. At the end they just flickered forward with the light and moved past me. I sat up, confused.
Of all the things I had expected to happen, this didn’t make the list. Getting up, I pushed it to the back of my mind. I wanted to get out of this corridor and ideally find a place with stable lighting. That was the priority for now. I walked away from the working janitors. My sense of urgency was now supplemented by caution.
The corridor seemed shorter than when I had initially looked around from the stairwell exit. I could see a branching corridor on the right only a few metres ahead, a door a fair distance on the left and a set of slightly open double doors straight ahead twenty or so metres away.
Through my steps, I brushed off a soft note as my imagination, but then a tune formed, its echo channelled through the walls. It was getting louder and louder. It wasn’t upbeat, neither was it menacing. If anything, the whistled tune was sad. It was coming from behind me. Looking back, I saw the furthest light in the distance flicker a final time then turn off. In its place a beam of light like that of a torch was shining from the side. Then as it turned around the corner, the second to furthest light also went dark.
My footsteps quickened and I went to turn into the branching corridor. Then I stopped dead. There was a single visible step down, then an indeterminable amount more that led into murky water. Not a chance. I didn’t need to see more. I stole a glance back and saw a third light go out, leaving only one more between the dark and the janitors who now stood to the sides. The single torchlight moved along the ground between them and continued upward towards me.
Only two options remained. I began a light jog towards the doors when I heard the whistle stop. My shadow grew long ahead of me as the light intensified. Then the barks began. Barks and the sounds of rustling chains reverberated throughout the corridor. As I ran forward, the barks weren’t keeping pace, they were closing in on me.
Glancing over, I was confused by the flicker of movement but there was nothing there. I could only see them on the walls, their shadows undistorted by the proximity to the light. Perhaps three moving as a pack. I could no longer see the janitors. The darkness would soon be nipping at my heels. I looked ahead, I knew their speed now, I knew mine. I needed to be faster. I clenched my fists and tried to force every muscle to push a little harder.
I spared the smallest portion of my focus for the choice ahead. If the door on the left could open, then it was the better option, but it was a big if. The double doors at the end were further off, but they were already parted in the middle. If I had to make it, I could make it. Not denial, encouragement.
[[Try The Side Door]]
[[Try Reach The Double Doors]] As unnerving as the scene was, I couldn’t detect any aggression. The janitors remained impassive to my presence. That wouldn’t stop me from preparing to run and staying vigilant should that change. There was a single nagging thought that began to surface and pull on my attention. What if this was all a misdirection?
It wasn’t unreasonable to believe most would focus on the uncanny human-esque cleaners. If they weren’t a real threat, it felt almost uncharacteristic of the hospital not to have something that was. I scanned the corridor from right to left. Nothing. At least nothing outside the corridor’s flashing lights, strange janitors and the overall vacant feeling of it. If something was lurking, it hid itself well.
The closest janitor and its partner continued making their way towards me. Observation and speculation would have to take a back seat. It was time to move. Stepping out from and around the small alcove, I felt the wall behind me expand until it was flush with the rest, almost like the hospital itself had taken a big breath.
Moving around the corner felt like stepping onto a ledge. I kept my feet from touching the puddle and edged myself along the gap. The janitors continued to ignore my presence and progressively wiped away at the black puddle.
I waited for the right moment. Every few swipes, the two janitors would inch forward. Where each swipe would end was entirely up to the lights' randomised flashes. There would be no perfect moment. I inched a little closer myself, before shifting my weight to my right leg.
3…2…1…Go!
I jumped just as the light flickered off, and when it came back on, I turned and saw I had passed by. What was strange was that the janitor had adjusted itself, now standing at a slight angle. In the next flash, it returned to its previous straightened form. There was a part of me that didn’t like it. I would rather it had ignored me completely even if it would have given me a fright. Courtesy, politeness, these should be human qualities. Not something it and I had in common.
I wanted to watch them leave. To make sure they were gone before I fully committed to this new direction, but even if I could not hear the seconds ticking by, I was sure something was keeping my time. It felt like turning my back on a stranger with a knife. Even if they hadn’t shown bad intent, it still didn’t feel wise.
The corridor seemed shorter than when I had initially looked around from the stairwell exit. I could see a branching corridor on the right only a few metres ahead, a door a fair distance on the left and a set of slightly open double doors straight ahead twenty or so metres away.
Through my steps, I brushed off a soft note as my imagination, but then a tune formed, its echo channelled through the walls. It was getting louder and louder. It wasn’t upbeat, neither was it menacing. If anything, the whistled tune was sad. It was coming from behind me. Looking back, I saw the furthest light in the distance flicker a final time then turn off. In its place a beam of light like that of a torch was shining from the side. Then as it turned around the corner, the second to furthest light also went dark.
My footsteps quickened and I went to turn into the branching corridor. Then I stopped dead. There was a single visible step down, then an indeterminable amount more that led into murky water. Not a chance. I didn’t need to see more. I stole a glance back and saw a third light go out, leaving only one more between the dark and the janitors who now stood to the sides. The single torchlight moved along the ground between them and continued upward towards me.
Only two options remained. I began a light jog towards the doors when I heard the whistle stop. My shadow grew long ahead of me as the light intensified. Then the barks began. Barks and the sounds of rustling chains reverberated throughout the corridor. As I ran forward, the barks weren’t keeping pace, they were closing in on me.
Glancing over, I was confused by the flicker of movement but there was nothing there. I could only see them on the walls, their shadows undistorted by the proximity to the light. Perhaps three moving as a pack. I could no longer see the janitors. The darkness would soon be nipping at my heels. I looked ahead, I knew their speed now, I knew mine. I needed to be faster. I clenched my fists and tried to force every muscle to push a little harder.
I spared the smallest portion of my focus for the choice ahead. If the door on the left could open, then it was the better option, but it was a big if. The double doors at the end were further off, but they were already parted in the middle. If I had to make it, I could make it. Not denial, encouragement.
[[Enter The Side Door]]
[[Run To The Double Doors]] Left. It was the only thought I needed. The sound of my own steps was drowned out by three sets of paws and the low toned barks of big dogs. Each second was a second they were closer. A second I no longer had to spare. The door was almost within reach when I heard them right behind me. I could not stop slowly. As I passed by it, I threw a hand and caught the doorknob.
The whiplash from the momentum could have wrenched my shoulder from its socket, in another world at least. I caught the briefest flicker of shadows passing by me. The skittering of nailed paws fighting for purchase on a smooth floor. I pulled myself up and turned the handle to my great relief. I pushed the door, entered, and slammed it shut. I sank down against it to keep it closed.
After a second to process the fact that I had survived, I stood up and noticed a button in the doorknob. I felt a slight sense of relief along with the soft click signifying the lock had engaged. Then I remembered they were shadows, so it might be possible for them to slip under the door. They were pouncing up on the door, still barking in different intervals. At least they didn’t seem to realise it for now, if they really could.
Just as I was about to turn away I felt the room rumble and shake. The barking stopped and a sharp whistle came from not far beyond the door. The shudders became a small but constant vibration and I felt the room moving. I opened the door a crack and then more as I saw the room was sliding to the left. A grey wall was already half blocking the door. I wondered if I should try to jump through the gap, but in my hesitation the doorway was sealed.
If I had a normal body, the hairs on the back of my neck would be standing at attention like a guilty soldier during an inspection. I’d experienced this feeling before. When you think you're alone but your body knows better. Only it wasn’t just knowing. I was sure the gravity had doubled since I’d entered. There was a presence in this room and its attention fell like a heavy hand that pushed down upon me.
Slowly and with great effort, I took several uncertain steps to turn myself around. I got an overwhelming sense that this room did not belong here. An orb of fire on the left illuminated the rest of the room. The floor was patterned, not like tile, it was as if a perfectly cut gem had been unfolded. Yet the stones' dark red and black colour rolled like mist in a gentle breeze. The walls were a shiny cobblestone, and where stars formed constellations, the wall had a holographic card effect. Different images of dividing bubbles and fire among others I couldn’t understand, they leapt so violently out from the walls I had to avert my gaze.
The pressure that had grown in my head found instant relief. Then the room instantly grew dimmer and I looked towards the fire. A glassy orb retained its size, but inside I saw a triangle. I took increasingly difficult steps over to get a better look. Its rounded top gave it away immediately. A person sat cross-legged. Their form was a silhouette in the light, then they expanded and so too did the flame. The full cycle played out before me. At the height of the blaze, it began to swirl and was sucked downwards before returning to its lesser state.
To my surprise, I felt fatigue growing, with each step towards the centre of the room the burden lightened, but the weight of being watched was constant. Opposite the door, I noticed something glowing on what looked to be a mix of alien laboratory table and a podium. The glowing object had two handles on either side of a bowl, its shape slimmed down and then widened at the bottom. As I approached, I felt unburdened, even elated. The object had a large star shape and an inscription below it.
“A toast to a rising star.”
I couldn’t understand how I could read it despite the metal trophy looking like it would begin to melt any second now. Inside a black liquid bubbled. It had a sweet smell, but not one I could place. I licked my chapped lips. In fact, I felt a certain thirst had suddenly grown, the back of my throat was uncomfortably dry. Then it hit me. I reached up and felt my face. It was back. My nose and mouth had returned to me.
Then I took a step back. A temptation had been thrust upon me, but I was not so impulsive. If I were to drink, it would be of my own choosing. On the right side of the room, the light had just turned its brightest, and I could just make out an altar with something beneath it. The gravity increased at a much quicker rate. I circled around the middle so I would not block the light. As I staggered, I could see a cushion below what was indeed an altar. To what? I could not tell, but I could see the imprints of two knees where others had knelt.
There was a bias on full display. Something did not want me over here. I wondered if, since a prayer got me into this wretched hospital, it might be possible for a prayer to get me out. A cynical voice whispered in the back of my mind that this was more likely a cruel joke. The more I thought, the less the clues I tried to piece together meant anything. A coin toss for the fate of my soul. To drink of greatness or to kneel before one.
[[Drink From The Chalice]]
[[Kneel And Pray]] Forward. Each step was hopeful. A desperate clawing towards an unknown future. The gap in the doors grew brighter. I could hear the dogs on my heels as I passed the protruding doorknob I rejected. A final bark before my ankle shifted. The right side of the leg was nudged to the leftward and it caught the back of the other. I rolled twice before I felt the grip of teeth wrap around my arm like bony fingers. Then another and another. I twisted my body until my feet touched the ground. My shadow in a tug of war against two phantom canines.
I leaned back and kicked, but there were no bodies to hit, and I lost further ground. I was being pulled closer to the edge of the light and closer to the sea of darkness ahead. The light that had been shining on me now swung pointing downward and approached. The doorknob I had just passed was getting closer, but I had no arm to reach for it.
Then it began to get brighter. I heard the double doors behind me open, and a new light poured in. The dogs on my arms retreated with whimpers, and the flashlight before me was raised. It stung my eyes, disorienting me, and turned my vision white.
I turned away only to get hit with the same sting but slightly stronger. I pushed my head towards the wall to seek relief from the overwhelming sensations. My right hip hit something as I covered my face.
“This one's mine,” the dog owner called.
“I’m closer,” the other replied.
Quick sets of steps approached me from both sides. Even with my eyes firmly shut, I could feel the light burning and see a growing whiteness. Then it came to me, there was only one thing that stuck out of the corridor's wall, one last sliver of hope to wrap my hand around.
Reaching down, I felt the doorknob, turned it quickly, then all but fell inside. An instant relief of the burning was like ice following a powerful mint. I shuddered involuntarily before the sound of steps roused me enough to remember to slam the door behind me. I held the doorknob to stop it from turning and began to hear pounding on the other side of the door.
As I held it tight, I noticed a button in the doorknob. I felt a slight sense of relief along with the soft click signifying the lock had engaged. Then I remembered they had shadow dogs, so it might be possible for them to slip under the door. If they would come, they would come, but I held the door closed all the same.
Then the room rumbled and shook. The banging outside stopped immediately, this was something else. The shudders became a small but constant vibration and I felt the room moving. The crack under the door had been shining with light, but now the darkness crept quickly from left to right.
When the shaking stopped, the outside was silent. The light under the door had completely vanished. Against my better judgment, I decided I needed to confirm the room led elsewhere. I opened the door, and a grey wall was blocking the exit and the doorway was sealed. The old danger had passed, but I became acutely aware that I was in a new surroundings now.
If I had a normal body, the hairs on the back of my neck would be standing at attention like a guilty soldier during an inspection. I’d experienced this feeling before. When you think you're alone but your body knows better. Only it wasn’t just knowing. I was sure the gravity had doubled since I’d entered. There was a presence in this room and its attention fell like a heavy hand that pushed down upon me.
Slowly and with great effort, I took several uncertain steps to turn myself around. I got an overwhelming sense that this room did not belong here. An orb of fire on the left illuminated the rest of the room. The floor was patterned, not like tile, it was as if a perfectly cut gem had been unfolded. Yet the stones' dark red and black colour rolled like mist in a gentle breeze. The walls were a shiny cobblestone, and where stars formed constellations, the wall had a holographic card effect. Different images of dividing bubbles and fire among others I couldn’t understand, they leapt so violently out from the walls I had to avert my gaze.
The pressure that had grown in my head found instant relief. Then the room instantly grew dimmer and I looked towards the fire. A glassy orb retained its size, but inside I saw a triangle. I took increasingly difficult steps over to get a better look. Its rounded top gave it away immediately. A person sat cross-legged. Their form was a silhouette in the light, then they expanded and so too did the flame. The full cycle played out before me. At the height of the blaze, it began to swirl and was sucked downwards before returning to its lesser state.
To my surprise, I felt fatigue growing, with each step towards the centre of the room the burden lightened, but the weight of being watched was constant. Opposite the door, I noticed something glowing on what looked to be a mix of alien laboratory table and a podium. The glowing object had two handles on either side of a bowl, its shape slimmed down and then widened at the bottom. As I approached, I felt unburdened, even elated. The object had a large star shape and an inscription below it.
“A toast to a rising star.”
I couldn’t understand how I could read it despite the metal trophy looking like it would begin to melt any second now. Inside a black liquid bubbled. It had a sweet smell, but not one I could place. I licked my chapped lips. In fact, I felt a certain thirst had suddenly grown, the back of my throat was uncomfortably dry. Then it hit me. I reached up and felt my face. It was back. My nose and mouth had returned to me.
Then I took a step back. A temptation had been thrust upon me, but I was not so impulsive. If I were to drink, it would be of my own choosing. On the right side of the room, the light had just turned its brightest, and I could just make out an altar with something beneath it. The gravity increased at a much quicker rate. I circled around the middle so I would not block the light. As I staggered, I could see a cushion below what was indeed an altar. To what? I could not tell, but I could see the imprints of two knees where others had knelt.
There was a bias on full display. Something did not want me over here. I wondered if, since a prayer got me into this wretched hospital, it might be possible for a prayer to get me out. A cynical voice whispered in the back of my mind that this was more likely a cruel joke. The more I thought, the less the clues I tried to piece together meant anything. A coin toss for the fate of my soul. To drink of greatness or to kneel before one.
[[Take A Drink From The Chalice]]
[[Kneel Down And Pray]] I came in through a misguided prayer. Was it so unreasonable to believe the entrance may also be an exit? With all the coercion pulling me to the cup, this has to be against its will, whatever ‘it’ was. I would not stumble on the last hurdle between me and freedom.
I lined my legs up then fell to my knees before the altar. With my head bowed I began to pray.
Please, send me back. I don’t…
Before I could utter another word I felt the familiar weight fall upon my right shoulder. In that warm, firm grip I could sense…confusion? Realisation? Amusement.
It did not laugh as I knew laughter, but I had little doubt as its hand shook and I felt the pulses and vibrations.
“Twice blessed, once cursed. We meet again for the second time, forever. Your. Wish. Is Granted.”
I blinked and I found myself in my hospital room. It was sunny. My family was standing at the foot of my bed. Frozen. That presence lingered with its hand on my shoulder.
“Have you ever considered the shape of eternity? You take two points of infinity and curl them around until they meet. Which point are you? Head or tail? Some would say both, but right now you are the head about to swallow yourself whole. Your kind call it ouroboros.”
My mind boiled, and as each bubble of thought rose I felt a lid it had put on top and none truly surfaced.
“I am not interested. For I am not really here. Just as those people, that family you see before you, they are gone too. You are a ghost out of time and I am an echo. This moment of us may be crystallised here with you, but you are alone.”
It paused, a moment dragged on and I felt its hand slowly slipping away.
“Does eternity have an off-ramp? Not even I can say.”
The hand finally left. I could feel it go, but it took something with it. What was it? What was what?
I winced in pain. It was hard to breathe. My family talked in hushed tones, and the warmth of the sun spread onto my leg. I could feel it now, drawing closer. My end was near.
[[A Dying Wish]] Like a hair trigger, my legs activate leaping left just as it pounces. A fleshy net of tongues barely misses me as it's cast out. I take off running. Instead of adrenaline I am left with this awful clarity, and a gurgle or rage echoes behind me. On a backward glance I see it struggling to turn but it begins to give chase.
Looking forward I see a crossroads. I turn left without thinking, distance is what matters now. The corridor has changed, no longer are there patients rooms, instead it's just plain walls with a hand rail on both. The sticky brown trail weaves from side to side, catching my feet every few steps. The handrail catches me, as I do my best just to stay upright.
Then I see my salvation, an open set of double doors only twenty metres away. I pull my leg up, it's better to try to jump over the brown substance than go through it. I check behind me and see the creature speed into the crossroads, the momentum too great to turn cleanly, it catches on the corner and spins half out of view.
It's maybe eight long jumps to safety so I begin, first I make it, second too. I look back and see it still orienting itself, and I jump again, too short. My right foot sticks and I pull twice to free myself. I take a few steps run up and make the next two big leaps in succession. The trail is too thick here, jumping would land me two feet in.
I check again, the creature is back on the trail now rounding the corner, it begins to follow the weaving trail and accelerate. It's only a few more jumps but it's gaining ground quickly. Its gurgles become rhythmic, like mocking laughter. I tear my eyes from it, now is the time to focus.
Two thoughts appear as I face the problem ahead, I could jump to the other side and continue, or I could try to pull myself along the handrail. It's now or never.
[[Climb On The Handrail]]
[[Leap To The Other Side]] The regret is almost instant. After hooking my heel onto the handrail my body swings into the wall and it unhooks. Hoisting the leg up again I gain purchase this time and begin to pull myself across. The idea of jumping onto the handrail and off to the other side only comes now. I’d be kicking myself if my legs weren’t preoccupied.
My motion gets smoother and I begin making a good pace going hand over hand. Clearing the brown patch I get ready to release just as the creature glides past, its body pushing me up against the wall before it continues forward. Raising my chin I look behind me and see it turning around. It's blocking the exit now.
I freeze, maintaining as absolute a stillness as I can manage. I think to pray, but then I fear what may answer. Instead I settle for closing my eyes. There are squishes and gurgles and sounds continue to come closer.
The noises stop close to me then fall silent and I remain unmoving. Neither my arms nor hands grow tired while I wait, then I slowly open my eyes. The first thing I notice is the figure in the doorway, someone is watching me, then I catch the movement in the corner of my eye, it's not just me it's us.
As my left eye traces down my arm from elbow to shoulder I see it. The creature knows patience. I wonder if it deliberately left a space between me and the open doorway as it moved to my side.
There’s a small hope, but I take it. I muster all the arm strength I can and launch my body towards the door and twist in the air, the creature doesn’t flinch. Just as I am about to land and close the last bit of distance I feel a tug on my leg. I’m pulled back and fall straight into the brown patch. I try to pull myself up but my chest and arms are stuck.
Then it pulls me in ever so slowly with other tongues gaining purchase. I look up and recognise the figure I’d met in the first corridor and see them already turning away. A split second of recognition before I am engulfed, squeezed and left in darkness.
The change is quick, like a bubbling warmth I feel my body expanding, taking the form of a blobby mass. I regain an awareness, a new form of sight, I can feel the edges of the corridor. The whole corridor. Then a new sensation, something foreign in my mouth? I expel the strange mass and a few stringy appendages go with them.
The lump falls to the floor, it's a person. They stumble as they try to get to their feet. Clinging to the handrail they drag themselves away before starting to limp and stagger forward. They struggle and keep turning back between me and the floor before finally crossing through the wall where the doorway had been and vanished.
Suddenly their face appears poking out of the wall, “It's your turn. Go on, run along now. Should have ran just a bit quicker eh. It will be a long time before you make that mistake again.”
I try to yell back but I only hear a gurgle. They disappear back into the wall and I take some time to process what just happened. I try turning around and find it's like making a corner on a truck I’ve never driven, if it had no tires.
My sentence begins, imprisoned in flesh.
Sparing not a moment I leap to the right and almost clear the gap. My right foot sticks but I lodge it free quickly before moving a couple steps along the wall, while the gurgles behind me grow louder and more aggressive.
It's just two more jumps. So I take it without hesitation and I make it while shoulder bumping the wall hard. I push off the wall and as I do so I hear the creature collide where I was moments ago. Tendrils whip out and I tuck in my limbs as I fly through the doorway and into a new room.
Rolling over I feel something touch my back and I flinch before jumping to the side.
“Whoa there buddy. You can relax, 270A can’t cross certain boundaries.”
I look up and see the same figure from the first corridor. Then I turn my attention to the doorway, the creature lashing its tendrils against the air but never passing inside. My train of thought was disrupted seeing its desperation as I tried to decide on my first question.
270A?
“Yep that’s him alright, been stuck like that for a good lot of time now. Hell, I've done a couple stints myself, but never as long as he has. Poor bastard.”
I sat back for a moment and looked around the large room. Checkered floor, three tables with benches, and a counter with a kitchen behind it. A cafeteria.
We weren’t alone, there were three other occupants. A man and woman sat across from each other on one of the tables maintaining steady eye contact between them. They remained motionless even as I entered. The other man was burying their head in their hands in a corner. There was a set of doors adjacent to the doorway I’d come through on the other side of the room, but these ones were still closed.
“Why don’t you and I park ourselves over there yonder and have a little chat before heading out again?” They said, pointing at the closest empty table.
The figure offered their hand and I took it and they pulled me to my feet. After taking a seat, I felt myself relax a little. Throwing a look towards the doorway I noticed ‘270A’ was already slinking off.
“I’m 3840 by the way. Just in case you’re confused, we use the room number we were in before coming here. That way we can figure out what happened sometimes when someone goes missing.”
I tried to recall, I hadn’t ever walked into that room myself, but I’d heard the nurses say it. Then it came back to me.
I’m 103C. I saw there were a lot of rooms on my way here, many of them were empty.
He shook his head, “Bad sign. Can never be one-hundred percent sure with this place, but it looks like there are two ultimate outcomes here. The ones who get stuck here get an empty bed when their room is added to the long hallway.” He paused in thought, eyes glazing over for a moment, then suddenly snapped back, “The other type, the uniques, an opportunity comes by every now and then. I haven’t quite found the courage to commit myself yet.”
How can you be so calm about all this? This is a nightmare, no worse. It's real.
He just nodded knowingly.
“Mhmm mhmm, won’t find a disagreement here. This place is a horror show and a half. No two ways about it. Complaining or crying doesn’t do an ounce of good though. I’m not even sure we can cry after all.” He said with a chuckle.
So then what do you do here? If you’ve been that creature twice you must have been here for quite some time.
“Well I wander around. I try to avoid the most dangerous parts and give the new arrivals some advice. There’s not an awful lot to do to pass the time if I’m honest.”
I put my head in my hands. It was a lot to think over. Then I heard him standing up and getting ready to leave.
“You should be on your way now. Those doors over there are closed but there’s no trick to em besides the handle. I’ll be hanging back here and try to motivate the others.” He said.
I stood up too, and made my way over to the closed doors. There were plenty of steps to make, but my gait gave no sign of the hesitation I felt growing in my heart. It wasn’t easy walking out again, but if I didn’t leave now it might become even harder to go. With both hands on the handles, a thought struck me, If I knew just a bit more I could brave it easier.
[[Stay]]
[[Leave]] My fingers slip down the sides of the handles.
Who could blame me? This was safety, an island in a sea of madness. From what 3840 had said, it only got worse from here, why rush to uncertain doom?
I felt myself step backward until a hand rested on my shoulder, “Had a feeling you might lose your nerve. Well don’t get too comfortable. I’ll introduce you to the others, but you really should get going soon.”
Turning my head I gave a small nod and I felt the grip on my shoulder tighten. 3840 gently pulled me over to the table where the two patients were deadlocked in each other’s gazes. We both took a seat across from each other and he pointed at the male patient.
“That’s 405G. Told me he was some trucker who fell asleep at the wheel, didn’t know how he made it to the hospital, but while getting a million volts to the heart he apparently did what we all did. He asked to live. Met him the same way I met you, just out in the hallway looking lost.” 3840 then leaned onto one palm, “But he mistook me for a demon and attacked me on sight. After a few minutes of my heckling he realised he couldn’t kill me. It took him a while to see the rest of us as people. It was actually when this one came along.” He said pointing to the female patient.
Okay?
I didn't have a lot to say. If there was a point, I couldn’t hazard a guess as to where it was hiding.
“Well one day he was in the hallways and much like I found him, he found her. When he went up to say hi she apparently kicked him square in the nuggets. That’s the point where he became certain that at least one other person was human. They made it to the cafeteria and grew sweet on each other. Every time I came back to this one they’d be talking, laughing and holding the other close. Until one day they weren’t.”
What did they fight about?
“She wanted them to leave, finally head out and be the first to find a joint eternity together. He told her they already had it right here. They didn’t appreciate my two cents, reality is that eternity is a lonely place and they don’t do pairs, not in this place. So against better judgement they started a staring contest, whoever wins decides. You’d think it a strange contest for two people in bodies that don’t need to blink, but now I see it differently, it's all about willpower. At first I thought he won since they’re here together, he would sit there and talk to her, but then she never replied. The eternal silent treatment.”
It doesn’t exactly sound smart, but also mostly harmless. There seem to be worse fates around than this.
“Well for now they’ve gone and trapped themselves. He thinks he’ll lose her forever the moment he looks away, but for all intents and purposes all he has currently is her image. As for her, I don’t know if it was spite or hope or something else that kept her there. She could have left any time, there wasn’t a binding vow or nothing to stop her. I reckon their minds have turned to mush.”
3840 leaned back and shook his head, “Doesn’t stop me from coming by and trying to talk sense into them, but it feels like talking to a headstone and I get about the same reaction.”
I clasped my hands and leaned forward onto the table. I eyed the two up for a moment and then spoke, “It’s not the worst thing in the world to sit with someone you love for eternity. It is kind of sweet that this is what they chose to do in the end.”
“They didn’t choose and neither of them would have chosen this. He would never have chosen her to stop talking. I’d skip out earlier than I’d like from my occasional rests here cause he wouldn’t stop yelling or pleading or whatever method it was that day. It’s not as easy to say for her, can’t speculate so much on silence, but I don’t believe she was happy. My point is that staying here is a compromise. Yours will be a whole lot sadder to look at though, like his.” 3840 said, pointing to the man in the corner.
“It may take some time, but if you don’t move on now then you may just become this room's new statue, and it's already got three more than it should.”
I looked over at the closed doors then hung my head. Boring was comfortable and safe. This bland room could shield me from all the horrors outside if I let it, and still a rational part of me did still want to go and brave the dangers. To seek out an eternity I could accept.
I felt the hand fall on my shoulder and give it a squeeze, “C’mon now. I believe you have some fight in ya yet.”
[[Leave]]
[[Give Up]] The doors swing open to a dimly lit corridor. It's unfinished, the floor is concrete and the walls still show the wooden frame that’s usually hidden. There were several bags of cement stacked up on the right side and a tipped over wheelbarrow further up in the middle, with its underside and wheel facing away. What unnerved me wasn’t that I could see people behind semiclear sheets of tarpaulin near the wheelbarrow, it’s what I heard behind them.
As clear as day a man’s whimper echoed through the hall, “Don’t do it doc, please just let me go.”
As I watch the backlit silhouette of a figure on what might be a bed struggling to free their legs and the other figure turning around, a sudden weight falls on my shoulder making me flinch, “Need a hand?” I hear 3840 ask.
Then before I can react he pushes me forward out of the cafeteria. After stumbling I catch myself and watch the scene before me continue to unfold.
“Nooooo stop!” The voice screams as I see a violent struggle.
I can make out that one is standing above the other, slowly lowering themself downward. I step forward, unsure of what to do, then hear the patient struggling before making a final gasp as the doctor violently sank down with victory.
“Shhh, there there. The pain will pass.” I heard them say, it sounded more menacing than any sort of comforting.
“Next!”
My eyes darted around, cement bags or wheelbarrow? Being closer to the wheelbarrow I took two steps forward and gently rolled my body inside as best as I could, curling up and bringing my knees to my chest. My head bent forward awkwardly against the backside near the handles, but it gave me a good view I hoped I wouldn’t need. I noticed where the doors to the cafeteria had been was now just a dark empty doorway of the same size.
I heard the tarpaulin roughly torn back and then nothing. After a minute I had begun to convince myself that the danger may have passed, then I saw a growing shadow stretch out in front of me followed by a loud bang on the side of the wheelbarrow. It took all I had not to jump, but I kept it together as I continued to watch and wait.
“The doctor will see you now, or shortly after I find you.”
I heard the foot scrape against the side of the wheelbarrow as it was removed. Then I heard the steps walking and saw the lab coat and legs move over to the cement bags and push the highest one off. It fell to the floor with an unceremonious thump. It then walked further towards the doorway and I saw its headless torso take a thinking pose.
With a “Hmm.” It began walking off into the darkness. I gave it five seconds before I unrolled myself and quickly headed behind the tarp. Just behind it, strapped to a gurney was a patient like myself with closed eyes. Their legs were strapped in, and in the middle of their chest was a large syringe. Around the room were varying power tools, some drills, a grinder and a jigsaw among others.
That’s when I noticed the trolley next to the gurney, it didn’t have any tools on it, but it did have limbs. There were some feet and hands, but there were half a dozen full arms and legs, many of which seemed to have different skin tones. For a moment I marveled at how strange it was that there was no blood or bone, just skin where there should be wounds. I shook my head to clear the thoughts, not the time, instead I put the jigsaw next to the patient’s arm and pulled out the needle.
I listened for footsteps, but couldn’t hear any so yanked the syringe out and saw their eyes flash open. They began to move around frantically knocking off the jigsaw. I managed to catch it just before it hit the ground, I stood and thrust the side of the tool into their chest hard. I felt their hands wrap around it and then turned and took off. The gurney stopped shaking and making noise before I heard the sound of the jigsaw.
Pushing through another set of tarps, I glanced back to see the doctor rush past the other patient and come straight after me. Any doubt I had about not staying to help longer disappeared as I looked ahead. The corridor was short and I was coming up on an intersection quickly.
I squinted as I struggled to read the dimly written signage. Radiology, Prosthetics Department. I winced at the possibilities, but wrestling a headless doctor was somehow lower on my priority list.
I heard the tarp behind me push open and I felt a minor relief that they weren’t yet within stabbing distance. Both choices held a potential I didn’t wish to explore, but I couldn’t stay here.
[[Go To Radiology]]
[[Go To Prosthetics]] I turned around and nodded at 3840.
Seems a bit early to part ways, would also be a shame to miss out on whatever’s going on in this hallway. That window over there showed me an alien world as if it were real.
“It is real, at least for him. 706D was a patient like us. He managed to find his own way after a short time here. I call those windows the uniques, no two are the same as far as I’ve seen. You may have also noticed the rooms with empty beds, well let’s just say if the hospital ever gets a grip on you it ain’t ever letting go.”
So if I had crossed over the lines in the Morgue…?
He nodded with a sort of sad look in his eyes, “That’s right, I’d pass by your room out here eventually. I also took you that way cause it ain’t such a bad fate really. You’ll see what I mean.”
3840 did a double take and then pointed down the corridor, “Watcha think that is down there?”
I followed his finger and the corridor was no longer looking so endless. The end was blocked by something grey coloured.
It looks like the roof collapsed, is that going to be a problem for us?
He gave a short chuckle, “That ain’t a roof collapse, that’s 270A. He ain’t the brightest fella, that’s why he’s been stuck looking like that for so long. Just don’t let him grab ya and you’ll be fine. Probably been sitting there, waiting for one of us to look into one of these windows.”
Is there some trick to getting past it?
He shook his head, “Not really, that body doesn’t turn too good and can’t jump so it’s not that hard to get by ‘em. I’d recommend using their trail to slide on, you’ve seen me do it, it's faster than running and you just gotta hop when you want to stop yourself.”
I wanted to stay and look inside at least a few more windows, but it was apparent that the time had passed. 3840 moved to the right side of the corridor and started walking towards it. I took the left and kept a single pace behind him.
As we got closer I noticed there were significantly more hospital rooms than ‘uniques’ that I passed. Then the thing in the corridor up ahead began moving, it was hard to tell, but I could see the edges of it moving, and after I could see it moving toward us.
Getting just ten metres away 3840 shot me a nod and began running towards it. I picked up the pace and readied to react to whatever came next. The creature was a lumpy grey and dark purplish creature with no discernable features.
I became increasingly anxious as we ran towards it, then it began to wiggle as 3840 reached its side. Then he jumped up and kicked off the wall, the creature lunged where he would have ran, and even as I reached its side it pursued him. I realised it had turned away from us in order to chase us after passing it. I was running side by side with the creature until it sped up and got ahead of me.
A four-way intersection was coming up. I saw some kind of tentacles emerge from the creature and just as it was about to grab at him, 3840 turned right into a branching corridor. The creature tried to throw itself that way but only hit the corner and spun. I was a beat away from jumping over to the right side when 3840 suddenly slid through the intersection and entered the left corridor.
Finally the monster and I were facing each other. A long vertical split down its front had several ivory hooked tongues reaching out of it. Then it moved and I turned the corner. The brown trail zigzagged in front of me along the full length of the corridor. 3840 was just reaching the end and about to cross into a new room. I was comfortable running, it was a familiar movement, it felt safe. To make it to the room I’d also have to jump across the brown trail multiple times. There was a line I could see in the middle. If I ran up and jumped before sliding, I could make it through without a single turn.
[[Outrun The Creature On Foot]]
[[Attempt To Slide Away]] I run two steps and jump. My right heel sticks to the brown trail and it takes a moment to pull it free. There’s around seven more jumps until I make it to the room. In the corner of my eye I see 3840 in the doorway watching me. I jump again and this time I make it cleanly to the other side.
“Slide now!” I hear the familiar voice call out to me.
I stick to my plan and jump over two trail curves in a row. I’ve got another jump ahead and then I see the curve after that is too long to jump. I quickly glance back and see the creature is wiggling right behind me. I jump to the other side of the corridor just as it lunges. I feel the teeth of one of its tongues slip off my ankle.
The creature slides into the middle of the hallway and begins to turn itself around. I’m stuck on this side, if I go forward, I’ll run right into its face. The thought of turning back and running the way flashes in my mind but I commit to this direction. I can do this.
Leaping forward, I get to the other side. I estimate its turn speed, the position I’ll be in when it strikes, and where I will kick off the wall like 3840 did earlier. On this side I get two large steps before I launch into the air next to the creature. I kick off the wall as planned, but a net of tentacles shoot out. I try to twist and slip through but this time, one does catch my ankle and I fall headfirst into the brown trail.
I feel my body lifting from my leg as I am peeled upward. Rhythmic mocking gurgles come from behind me and I feel a warmth spread up my body before I am pulled into a darkness.
The change is quick, like a bubbling warmth I feel my body expanding, taking the form of a blobby mass. I regain an awareness, a new form of sight, I can feel the edges of the corridor. The whole corridor. Then a new sensation, something foreign in my mouth? I expel the strange mass and a few stringy appendages go with them.
The lump falls to the floor, it's a person. They stumble as they try to get to their feet. Clinging to the handrail they drag themselves away before starting to limp and stagger forward. They struggle and keep turning back between me and the floor before finally crossing through the wall where the doorway had been and vanished.
Suddenly their face appears poking out of the wall, “It's your turn. Go on, run along now. Should have ran just a bit quicker eh. It will be a long time before you make that mistake again.”
I try to yell back but I only hear a gurgle. They disappear back into the wall and I take some time to process what just happened. I try turning around and find it's like making a corner on a truck I’ve never driven, if it had no tires.
My sentence begins, imprisoned in flesh.
I’ve worn socks on hardwood floors, sliding intentionally was never hard. I trust my balance.
The launch point is a jump and a couple steps away. I leap over the first brown curve and heel sticks. A moment is wasted as I pull it off. I lean forward, my eyes fall on my target landing spot and I push off hard. My second step becomes a jump and I launch myself above the trail with full force.
My left leg extends with the foot pointing in front of me while my right leg stays under my hip with the foot facing the side. Both knees bend slightly as I land. The momentum drives me forward while my right foot stabilizes me. A strange acceleration builds and my left leg goes out more to help shift my weight. It was so quick, I realise I’m about to reach the end.
My left foot sticks, and my right foot collides into it. The graceful slide is stopped dead as I pivot from my spot right into the ground.
“Forgot about the hop huh.”
I feel two arms reach under my armpits and tug me free before they pull me the rest of the way inside, then drop me. Recovering from my shock, I roll over and turn to look at the doorway. The creature looks to have given up and isn’t even halfway down the corridor. I’m about to lie back when I remember we entered a new room and shoot to my feet.
“Whoa now, take it easy. You just made it to the safest place in this joint.” 3840 reassures.
I look around the large room. Checkered floor, three tables with benches, and a counter with a kitchen behind it. A cafeteria.
We weren’t alone, there were three other occupants. A man and woman sat across from each other on one of the tables maintaining steady eye contact between them. They remained motionless even as I entered. The other man was burying his head in their hands while sitting in a corner. There was a set of doors adjacent to the doorway I’d come through on the other side of the room, but these ones were still closed.
“Hey buddy, let’s take a seat, I’m sure you’ve been holding a question or two at the ready. If there’s a time to fire it off it's now.”
We walk over to the table nearest the closed doors and sit down across from each other. A few questions roll around in my mind before I finally settle on one.
That creature outside. You mentioned it before but what is it?
“Who 270A?” He asked, a thumb pointing over to the corridor we’d been chased through.
After I nodded 3840 continued, “Just a patient like you and me. He got caught by the last guy in that body, so now it's his turn until he catches someone else. It's about the grossest game of tag you can play. I’ve been ‘it’ a couple times. The first time was a short stint, second I did a little catch and release.”
I don’t know what kind of expression he read in my eyes, but he laughed after giving me a double take. It was the first time I stopped to really consider whether he was really sane.
“There’s not a whole lot to do around here and it's really just a little harmless fun. They get the bejeezus scared out of them and give me a laugh, and they have a get out of jail free card while I’m the monster, well until I got bored that is.”
My slow nods concealed my concern. The biggest question in my mind became how long he’d been here, but I didn’t want to know anymore. Either long enough where becoming a monster was a leisure activity, or he was insane and likely couldn’t tell me anyway. Maybe both, but it didn’t matter. I needed to ask something that might help me survive here.
Is there anything you think I should know or would help me? You sound like you’ve been here a real long time, have you figured out what this place is? .
3840 thought for a moment with his arms resting on the back of his head, he stared at the ceiling for a while then nodded, “Well sure, let’s start with where we are. Hard to classify what it is, but it ain’t no hospital, it may look like one but it’s the furthest thing from it. This whole place is alive and it doesn’t save nobody.”
He leaned forward, his hands clasping in front of him as he looked at me seriously, “You got to do a good turn by other people here and there. I wish I didn’t know the answer to a lot of questions that got asked of me. You’ll be asked too, even worse, you’ll answer. This whole goddamn place might just be designed to rot the soul.”
I remained silent. These weren’t really the sort of answers I was looking for, but 3840 seemed to need to get this off his chest. A moment later he leaned back in his chair and folded his arms.
“You’ve done good so far, but I can’t tell you if you have the tenacity to go all the way. I wish I could give you more specific advice but you never know which rooms will appear, or what state they’ll be in when you arrive. So far I’ve never come across a room that was impossible to get through, a “good” person might not see eye to eye on that with me, but they wouldn’t be here.”
I could feel they were finished so I nodded and wracked my brain for anything else I was desperate to know.
Ah, here’s one, So before you told me not to go down the stairwell. Are there any other places or objects I should avoid?
“Well you already know about the asylum. Hmm-” He thought for a moment, “Don’t go breaking windows. Only seen it happen once, heard the person scream as they were sucked out. Damn near took me with them. Could be a coincidence, but I’ve never seen their room in the long hallway, and it's been a while”
Alright that’s good to know, I guess we’re stuck here and there’s no real way to escape. I had a feeling that it wouldn’t be so easy. Just human rats in an existential maze.
3840 stood up and motioned for me to stand as well, “I’d say that’s enough rest. You should head out while you’re fresh. I’ll try to motivate some of the stragglers here. They’ve been stagnant longer than they should.”
We could stick together, if it's not too much trouble. I can wait for you to finish any business you have here.
“Partnerships can exist out that door,” He said pointing to where we entered, “-but they never survive out that one.”
[[Stay Here]]
[[Leave Now]] No, I don’t.
The words slipped out. I pulled my shoulder free from 3840’s hand and laid my head into my arms. It reminded me of being young, trying to sneak an extra nap in during class. With closed eyes I ignored the world around me. Voices faded into the background, first 3840’s, then my own. It wasn’t tiredness, I knew I couldn’t sleep, but there was some other kind of lull that I could feel swelling inside me and pulling at my eyes.
My drifting away was then interrupted by a loud crack around the table. I was irritated by the interruption until I lifted my head and opened my eyes. It was bright and warm. The smoke blew into my eyes and I felt the nip of a flame and jumped back. I could smell again, it was a powerful and familiar scent of burning wood. I crouched and blinked in an attempt to regain my vision.
I’d been sitting on a stump and leaning against a log. Fire had already ignited the night and ate away at the forest to my left. I saw it beginning to surround me now so I scanned the scenery and found a safe direction. So then I ran, confused and afraid, but I felt the sensation of adrenaline. Touching my face I felt a nose and mouth and then coughed having inhaled a bit too much smoke. Stumbling, I managed to keep my feet despite the roots and kept running until I found a clearing.
Upon exiting the treeline I heard whispers. Two voices, too hushed to decipher. I crept closer. Without the fire light it was darker, but moonlight shone down without the canopy to block it. Grassy reeds blocked my view of whoever was lurking nearby, the tips of the foliage caught the light and turned an enchanting color of silver.
My approach was far from stealthy. The grass made a heavy rustling even as I tried to slowly pull myself in gently after planting each foot. The whispers went quiet.
Hello? I’m friendly. I just woke up here after falling asleep in a cafeteria.
The whispers started back up, the volume so low that I thought I could be imagining them. So I took further steps in and then I saw a human shape pop up out of the grass ahead of me. They took two quick looks around and then pulled me down into the tall grass.
“Shh, we’ll explain, we will. Just don’t make a sound.” I heard a woman's voice say.
“You’re not alive, you’re still in the cafeteria, but within this dream is practically another life. Neither of us know how to get back there yet. At dawn we suddenly wake from dusk in a new dream. What room number are you?” A man's voice explained.
It was a lot to process. It felt too lucid for even lucid dreaming. I had a working youthful body and senses that worked. I had begun to feel like I had made a good choice staying behind. Although there was something glaringly obvious that threatened to change that.
I’m 103C. Why are we hiding and whispering? I asked.
“Okay good, remember this is important, 405G and 34D. Repeat it.”
405G and 34D, I got it. Now why are we doing this?
I was met with the answer to my question. At first, silence, but silence eroded rapidly by the sound of heavy steps. They were approaching from where the forest burned, then stopped for a moment before entering the grass. The rustling was moving in this direction. There was another noise too, subtle and quick. The sound of a sharp blade cutting through grass. My heart beat faster and faster. The sensation of fear froze me solid and then I felt the brush of air and a heavy plated foot stomped the ground next to my face.
There was a cry of pain, belonging to the male voice. I heard the plates shift as the figure turned in that direction, then pulled the man up. The struggle was fierce, but pointless. I heard it all the way from here in the grass to deep in the burning forest as he was carried back.
“Damn it. At least it's almost dawn. They won’t have much time, I hope they choke on him.” The woman said.
What was that?
“A hunter. Each dream has a version that tracks us. Many eat us too, we cannot die but we can be digested, you’ll know how that feels soon. How it feels to beg and pray for dawn.”
A familiar scream cut through the stillness, sounds I’d never heard a human make. I shivered in tune to the sound of agony. Then I heard more footsteps approaching. The light was deaf that night.
There was something less creepy about radiology by the simple virtue of it not having to do with severed limbs. As I reached the junction I turned left into the new corridor, noticing it was bare but completed with its beige walls and polished floor. The jigsaw's distant whine was the only noise I heard besides my own steps, but then it stopped abruptly. Casting a look back I found no pursuer. A resolution had been made.
Ahead was a new doorway and a much brighter room this time. I slowed my pace. There was no need to rush in. Creeping up I stood behind the frame and peeked inside, there was movement on the roof, some device darting about on a sort of rail system. Right ahead was a wall about half my height and steps leading down to the main floor. Just beyond the stairs I could clearly make out a couple examining tables on either side of the room, but it was the floor that caught my attention, it made the tables look like islands in some surreal patchwork ocean. Lighter and darker tones were in constant motion, rising and falling, until the machine got above them, then they would settle.
Despite the alien nature of the scene before me, I didn’t feel immediate danger so I made my way into the room. The first thing I became aware of was a low drone from the movement and the rapid sound of clicks when the machine stopped. On my right side I noticed a large window a story higher with the shoulders of a headless doctor just visible. Their movements were small but I guessed they were operating the mechanism on the roof.
There was a rough edge mirrored on both sides of the room, near the sets of stairs the mat didn’t spread to. I looked above and saw that it was pretty similar to the rectangular shape the rails made. I took a quick look to my sides and noticed on my left was a light green outfit hanging on a hook. Not overalls but a single piece of clothing. I went and picked it up and was surprised at the weight, at least a few kilograms, possibly more.
Having finished exploring and taking in the room I held the heavy clothing in front of me protectively. I didn’t want to get any closer to whatever was on the floor, but no other options were left to me. I wondered for a moment if the prosthetics department was worse than this, but it didn’t matter now.
There was a growing suspicion of what was lying before me, and as I took a few steps down I was still more disturbed than I expected. I saw the forming shapes contrasting against the other nearby shades, faces, fingers, even the beginning of limbs. They were puddles that yearned to be people. I watched the closest one, a light brown tan, fingers poked out, then a hand to wrist and even forearm reaching out and up. Then I heard the click, and watched fingers first, then hand and wrist melt away back into the formless puddle.
I didn’t know what to do so I sat on the steps and just watched the flame come to the moths. There was a part of me that wanted to reach out and help, but I feared it would pull me in instead, like a drowning man who kills their would be savior. It felt selfish to admit but, I didn’t want to risk experiencing whatever kind of torture this looked to be.
After a bit of time I noticed a pattern, whichever puddle formed the most gained priority, and the machine would target them. It stood to reason that would include me, which meant I had a short time to get across. I looked at the lead clothing I had picked up. It was possible it would shield me from the xray, but it might shield something else first.
Two plans formed as I looked out, I could shield myself with the lead clothing and carefully try to walk on top of the puddles until I made it through to the end. Or shield one of the puddles in the corner and draw the xray to them by pulling the clothing away, then get onto one of the tables and try to jump to the other side. It was difficult, the deciding factor was how much the puddles would prove to be an obstacle. I would step over their bodies for the chance to survive, so I wondered, what would they do?
[[Run Across]]
[[Bait The Xray]] As I turn right and pass the corner, I know the prosthetics are going to be creepy. At the same time I don’t want to know what radiation does, not here. The corridor is bright, the brightest yet. There are two long lights with occasional square shaped ones between them running down the whole length of the ceiling, they reflect off what looks to be a recently polished floor. Despite the clean look it's not perfect, I can still make out slight black markings where a set of wheels have rolled up and down the floor.
The sound of the jigsaw catches up to me. It fires up quickly then fades almost as fast, but as it does I hear the footsteps and squeaky wheels taking their place. Looking back I see the headless doctor trying to take the corner too quickly. A leg and two hands fly off the trolley, and to my surprise the doctor stops and begins to pick up the fallen limbs.
I turn my head and find myself on the floor. No pain, but I notice the doors right ahead of me. The hallway had shortened. I hear the squeaky wheels and jump to my feet. I shake the handles but the doors refuse to open. I look back and see the doctor pushing their trolley my way, behind them the patient from before appears and looks this way, then runs towards Radiology. I would have done the same.
“A donation is required to enter, it doesn’t have to cost you an arm or a leg.” The doctor said while holding up a severed hand and foot.
Foot. The word slips out of my mouth, the trolley full of limbs did make me question whether they were all taken by force or if most others volunteered. Maybe only those who gave a full limb got strapped to the gurney.
I walked over and rested my left ankle on the trolley, and the doctor slowly moved an arm behind him. I heard my foot fall against the metal before I registered his slash. I heard the doors behind me swing open and the doctor began pushing the trolley forward forcing me to hop back.
“Aren’t you fortunate, we were running low on prosthetics but you will have many to choose from.” The doctor noted cheerily.
I hopped quickly into the room and began scanning the surrounding, a conveyor belt leading to an intake marked deposits on my right. Two patients wrestling with saws in their hands in the middle of the room, one without a hand and the other without a foot. Around them there are only two prosthetics, a full leg hopping around and a hand running on all fingers. The hand leaps at one of the patients, it flips in the air and lands on their wrist before the mechanism clamps down.
Both patients launch into the air where I now see dozens of patients strung up by one or more limbs. There’s a glint of metallic wires that seem to connect them to something unseen above. The patient missing a foot drops hard but gets up and begins fighting for the hanging patient's leg, swinging wildly with the saw they get a clean hit and slice half a leg off.
The trolley bumps into me in the doorway, I shake it twice, managing to rock it over onto its side before hopping inside the room. I hear a non-existent tongue click behind me, but it's the screaming hanging patient that gets my attention. They look to be trying to cut their own arm just under the prosthetic, but drop the saw in their panic. The other patient finishes sawing the leg they dismembered, they too drop their saw and pick up the foot and after placing it on their own stump, it connects to their own leg and they take off towards the exit.
I hop forward and pick up the closest saw. Then the belt turns on behind me as I see the doctor begin to place limbs down first and then start grabbing at hands and feet. Looking around, there’s only one easily reachable foot, all the other patients either have theirs replaced or are hanging too high up. They’re all rising up into the darkness above slowly.
“Wait please listen, if you pass me a saw I’ll help you. We can work together. I’ll even give you my foot. Just please let me down first.” The patient pleads.
Just then around the conveyor belt I see a new prosthetic arm and leg enter the room from that side. It becomes clear that once fed into the machine, those feet will start hunting my own leg soon. From behind I hear a new arrival, their footsteps are echoing as they run down the corridor this way.
My mind races, I wonder if I can take one of those other feet before they get turned into prosthetics. The person hanging has a foot nearby and it seems the least risky, I could even pretend to help to get a good swipe in. Or I could help free them, and maybe work together against the new patient. Looking up at the hanging patient, their desperate shaking as they are slowly raised, it seems a little late for hope.
[[Take Their Foot]]
[[Try Help Them]] Resting the middle of the lead clothing on my head I tuck my arms in and rest them just above my forehead. There’s a good gap between elbows and wrists to see through, so I stand at the edge and begin to think it over.
It would be best to avoid fingers and arms. Why raise the risk of getting grasped? No running either, a single slip and it's over. I step back, I practice hopping, aiming for a soft landing and explosive launch. Just in case a puddle gets too attached. Having the lead clothes is a surprising help to balance, there’s a sort of confidence growing as I look over the morphing skin field.
There’s a lot of hands and fingers so I wait, wanting to see at least one eligible spot to hop per two by two patch. Every now and then I see a possible chance to go, but it's never perfect. Maybe it never will be. It is a discouraging thought, but I don’t want to find out why there never seems to be anyone else waiting in a room.
Then I see, in a rough three patch row ahead, there are legs, bodies and even a couple faces. 3…2…1…
I hop as far as I can and land on the top half of a leg, My left foot sinks and as it does I feel the flesh wrapping around my toes. The droning movement is closing in on my position, but I trust in the lead clothing. So I bend my knee slightly and push off as hard as I can, my foot slips slightly and much of the force is absorbed by the mass, I make it only half a metre.
As the next foot touches down I feel the weight of something on my raised foot, I realise the first puddle never let go, a hand is starting to clasp its fingers with my toes and is pulling itself up towards me. I don’t even get to look at the other foot that’s now sunk up to my ankle. The one moment of delay now traps me. It's not over yet, I yank my left foot, then I kick and kick. The puddle and I are locked in a stalemate, while another has climbed my right leg up to the knee.
I hear clicks above, but it doesn’t go for me, the hand that held my foot melts away along with its pull. I fall forward into a kneeling position and sink into the human mud. Above me I see the xray chamber point down.
I feel each click, but only hear it once. It's like the sun is hammered into my face and shoulders, then it hits again and again, dissolving more of my bones each time, always hitting my face and shoulders first. I instantly regret looking up.
The pain and formlessness turn me into conscious lava. On instinct alone my body tries to regain its shape, to reach out and never down, so I feel my fingers pushing through my facial skin. The rigidity of bone becomes a pleasant sensation, compared to the formless burning mass the rest of my body takes, it's as though I reach up to heaven. Then heaven answers with fire.
Fine, I’ll help you.
Against my better judgement I jump up and try to pass the saw to the hanging patient, even holding the back of the saw they still fail to grab it. Giving it a final try I feel them get their fingers around it and let it go.
I see a couple prosthetic hands begin to walk around the room but what grabs my attention is a couple feet are being placed onto the conveyor belt. Time is running out. I hear the doors slam close. The outside patient never made it in. I realised then that of course they couldn’t ‘make a donation.’
Hobbling as fast as I can, I was too late to grab the first but get the second foot just before it entered the machine. Not all is lost, I place it against my ankle stump, It doesn’t join.
I stand there in disbelief. I push harder, I begin to grind them together, nothing happens. In anger I throw it across the room and see the doctor chase after it. Then I notice the patient, with their arm missing below the wrist, hopping closer on half a mangled leg. The saw in their one hand becomes my main focus. As the patient closes in I hobble right, and as I circle around them, getting close to the other saw, I feel something attach itself to my ankle.
Being so close I make a dive for it, the saw is just within reach when I feel the pull, the tug, the end of the line.
I hear laughing as I’m dragged along the floor and then hung upside down in the middle of the room. I become acutely aware of the circular hole in the ceiling right above me. My body spins slowly and with each rotation I see the other patient getting closer. With my back turning as they come into range I tuck in my arms and lean forward, raising my body up, I feel the wave of air from the saw swing as it misses my shoulder.
“Hey you can still save me, don’t condemn both of us.” The patient says.
Twisting in the air, I can barely track the saw swinging at me, but I feel the gashes made along my body. Then I see the hand walking behind them, it launches up and catches their wristless arm. Their body knocks into mine as they also get raised up. We scuffle and I manage to grab their single wrist and begin trying to pry away their fingers.
I only need the one leg, I can still make it out of here. Please just give me the saw.
The other patient goes still for a moment, their grip slowly loosening, then they flick their wrist sending the saw down to the ground. By the time I reach for it it's too late.
Why? Is all that I can ask.
“I’m not going up there alone. You’re coming with me.” They say.
I swing and punch and kick, and they just laugh. Then I stop. I need to find a way to get free. As we ascend it gets darker and darker. Looking down I can see a lot of movement, until the chamber begins to close a few metres below me. I try to contort my body upward and then down, I pull down on the patient and try to break my leg out of the prosthetic foot, but it's hooked in tight.
The last of the light disappears below and I wonder if this is it. I notice the hum, first in the prosthetic, then as it grows it surrounds me. It gets louder and louder until it feels like the whole chamber is shaking. The pressure forces my body against the other patient. My arms struggle to move my hands to their throat. I feel my form, their form stretching thinner and thinner.
We’re merging. I can sense their fear and it grows as it reacts to my spite. Even as our bodies stretch to become as thin as fishing lines, it’s not the most intense sensation, I feel our psyches collide like two buses and space doubles instantly. I can sense their awareness as we share the mental space. I start by imagining hands and I reach out and grab what I believe represents them. It's half an orb floating in this empty space, its own arms start to form as it tries to knock mine away.
Something shines for a moment, as I begin to picture a floor and wall, my arm is cut. The pain is visceral, I'm almost stunned as I register sensation for the first time in too long. I see their arms now hold a blurry knife, blood covered. Our minds fill in the blanks and this space is becoming vivid, if not the new real.
War it is. I declare loudly. I feel the weight of a tank on my back, the pipes that lead forward and connect to a flaming barrel, the soft pull of a trigger. Screams follow the flames.
Laugh my friend, let us play for eternity.
I decided speed would be the key to passing this trial, I didn’t want to test my weight upon the desperate, instead I would do worse.
It was too far to jump from this side onto a table due to its height, but if I threw the lead clothing down I could make it easily. That just meant I had to make sure to take it back. As for the jump from the table to the other side, I was confident I could make the jump, so it was just a matter of avoiding the xray.
Looking at the patches on both sides, the one on the left was paler and smaller. I liked my chances of pulling back the lead clothing more than the larger tan puddle on the right. The plan was clear in my mind. I rolled the clothing around my arm once and let the rest hang down, then grabbed the wall behind me. If they tried to yank me in or take the clothing they would have to give me one hell of a fight for it.
I waited until the puddle in the opposite corner got zapped, then swung the lead clothing out and covered the pale one. Its arm grew up and I had to keep lifting and shaking the clothing to avoid it from grabbing it. The xray came by, but only culled those close and didn’t waste time on the one I cultivated. I saw a shoulder, a neck, they were slender. How old could this person be?
The xray continued to zip around and I kept waiting for it to hit the opposite corner, it was my signal, my starting gun. I kept jostling the clothing but when I looked down I saw a small figure, a young lady, possibly a girl. They did not try to forcefully grab the clothing, but just cowered under it. From under it they looked up at me, now just a half melted person, their eyes just now forming.
“Th-thank you…” They said weakly.
Were they small enough for me to throw? To carry? Was there any way that we could both escape this together? Then I saw it, the xray finally made it to the opposite corner. I looked down into dark brown eyes, then I pulled the clothing away. Their eyes widened, “No please, please don’t go!”
I turned away and began running to the other side, I wouldn’t waste the seconds that she would pay for. First came her desperate slaps on the concrete behind me, then the droning hum of the xray. I unwrapped the lead clothing from my arm and then prepared to throw it towards the table. She screamed before the click, I threw the clothing and ran across it. There was no second scream, but there was a third, even fourth click.
I leapt up onto the table, it took one bound to cross it, and with the same momentum pushed up and forward over the remaining puddles. My arc wasn’t perfect, too low, I lifted my legs which just gave me the clearance to make it cleanly over to the other side. It was a hard landing, I rolled into the corner, then rushed up the stairs.
There was something in me telling me there was no point in looking back, but I had to see. On the other side there was no ‘she’ and no brown eyes. Just a pale puddle and the sound of the xray.
Why would I think it would not be? I heard it happen. Look, get yourself together. Nothing has changed besides getting myself to the other side. I have succeeded, even survived. Oh just stop it.
I couldn’t find the will to maintain the farce. I took the necessary steps forward, then leaned up against the doorframe that led to the next corridor. It was a triumph, but not one worth celebrating. That was all there was to it.
This corridor was very short, I could see there were many cubicles on both sides through large glass windows, they were all in shadow, as if it were closed and all the employees had gone home. There was only a single door that was straight ahead with a plaque that read ‘Chief of Medicine.’
There was only one way forward so I went and pushed down on the handle, it clicked open, and the door swung gently revealing a well lit and clean office. There was a rug and two chairs on this side of a large desk. Various bookshelves and cabinets lined the room, but on the desk was a computer.
Nothing else caught my eye, so I went and sat down in the armchair across from the computer. It had a grey wired mouse and keyboard, when I tried clicking the mouse the screen lit up. A recording began to play, it started in a dark green corridor and two people with one backing away. Then it cut to them parting ways, next it was a passageway with heavy metal doors, and someone sneaking around.
Then it clicked, not just someone. That was me. It was odd to see it from the outside, the sneaking, the running and then the collision. I found I was rooting for myself. I wanted to cheer as I saw my shoulder connect with the straitjacket and then outrun the headless doctor. I felt the urge even stronger when I saw myself dodge and then desperately escape the creature in the wide hallway. It was tense even knowing how it would end.
Next was the unfinished corridor, seeing the headless doctor come out and rest its foot on the wheelbarrow was a bit unnerving. I suddenly began feeling anxious, not because of what I was shown, but what I knew was coming next. There was nothing else to do here so I kept watching, this time it lingered on the person on the gurney, struggling with the jigsaw to cut themselves free. I saw the doctor run past ignoring them and coming after me.
My mood lightened when I saw they had freed themselves just before the doctor came back, then the feed switched just as their chase began. That was until I saw myself in the Radiology room. It skipped to the moment I abandoned the young lady. I tried to look away, but some force did not allow me to. I could see her clawing at the ground, her legs forming, being so close to whole again. Then it reached her.
I could see the impact of each click. In less than two seconds, her form collapsed. Then I saw myself on the feed turn around and after a moment move on.
What else could I do? I couldn’t take that chance. There was only one shot to make it across.
I don’t know why I expected an answer, the screen finished playing the video and at first went black. Then a single solid white line of text popped up with a couple flashing symbols below.
Can you judge a character before their story ends? Y/N
[[Type Y]]
[[Type N]] Okay, but we have to hurry.
Their hand reaches down as I raise the saw just a little out of reach. I can see they’re trying to keep their other leg away with their knee bent, but when they grab for the saw it lowers. It's still too high, so I inch the saw just a little closer, their fingertips brushing the handle. A close call, but their leg lowers again and now I see my chance.
I jump up, their eyes are locked on the saw, but I lower the arm holding it. Instead the other arm grabs their ankle and drags it down from its ninety degree angle. With the saw already raised I press it to the skin. It only takes one motion for the foot to come with, my new foot.
Wasting no time I place it on my stump and the sensation returns immediately. It morphs into my own, their right foot becoming my left, the toes rearranging themselves like strangers on a busy walkway.
“Y-you fucking…!” I hear the person exclaim in disbelief.
My focus goes straight to the exit. Nothing good can come from lingering. I hear the door slam behind me and realise the other person couldn’t pay the toll. After walking to the exit I give a final look back and see two prosthetic feet racing towards the hanging patient, they’re in a dead heat, but one launches first and attaches to the ankle. I turn around before I see the patient disappear into the ceiling hole.
I go to open the door ahead of me and it opens before I touch the handle, two steps later and it slams shut behind me. Something doesn’t sit right with me, and it's not my new foot, it fits perfectly. My logic tells me I could have at least tried to use one of the disembodied feet from the trolley, maybe even my own. Could it have been that easy? I shake my head, it was too great a risk with too little time.
Looking up I found this new corridor was very short, I could see there were many cubicles on both sides through large glass windows, they were all in shadow, as if it were closed and all the employees had gone home. There was only a single door that was straight ahead with a plaque that read ‘Chief of Medicine.’
There was only one way forward so I went and pushed down on the handle, it clicked open, and the door swung gently revealing a well lit and clean office. There was a rug and two chairs on this side of a large desk. Various bookshelves and cabinets lined the room, but on the desk was a computer.
Nothing else caught my eye, so I went and sat down in the armchair across from the computer. It had a grey wired mouse and keyboard, when I tried clicking the mouse the screen lit up. A recording began to play, it started in a dark green corridor and two people with one backing away. Then it cut to them parting ways, next it was a passageway with heavy metal doors, and someone sneaking around.
Then it clicked, not just someone. That was me. It was odd to see it from the outside, the sneaking, the running and then the collision. I found I was rooting for myself. I wanted to cheer as I saw my shoulder connect with the straitjacket and then outrun the headless doctor. I felt the urge even stronger when I saw myself dodge and then desperately escape the creature in the wide hallway. It was tense even knowing how it would end.
Next was the unfinished corridor, seeing the headless doctor come out and rest its foot on the wheelbarrow was a bit unnerving. Even more so when I watched the doctor go back for the trolley after seeing me run towards prosthetics. That snap decision making seemed far from mindless. I leaned in and watched the doctor picking up extremities after rounding the corner too quickly. I’d assumed they were puppets, entities native to wherever I was, but I started to suspect they might be human too. At least originally.
After watching myself get cornered and the other patient run down the hall, and my amputation for entry, it finally came to the last room. The angle was from just inside the ceiling hole looking down. I see the scuffle with saws, the prosthetic attach and lift both patients up, then one patient harvest from the other.
Then I entered. Watching one arm offering the saw and the other reaching for their leg, it made me wonder why their hope had to be the key to my survival.
I saw myself leap and I wanted to turn away, but something would not allow me. I pounced on that leg like a starving animal. Then in an instant I held my prize, while above me I could see the other patient flailing in rage, and I just walked away. The patient continued to throw themselves around and swung violently, that was until the prosthetic foot attached itself and lifted them higher.
The patient went limp, only swinging gently now. I couldn’t see their eyes from this angle, but I was sure I had just witnessed hope die.
Why are you showing me this? It wasn’t my fault. If anything it was the doctor, the room, the other patient and even themselves. We all had our role to play in this outcome.
I don’t know why I expected an answer, the screen finished playing the video and at first went black. Then a single solid white line of text popped up with a couple flashing symbols below.
Can you judge a character before their story ends? Y/N
[[Type Y]]
[[Type N]] I leaned back in the chair and thought for a moment. I had borne witness to eternal damnation. The ending of the stories I’d seen written patient by patient along the corridor’s walls. Perhaps just being here was the process, both hospital and patient working together to sort themselves, to be filed away in whichever eternity they navigated to. Thinking back to the video, it had been cut short to highlight certain moments, which alluded to it already having made some judgments. Did the devil set hell to autopilot?
Without more context I couldn’t be sure of the spirit the question was asked in. It could be philosophical, practical or hypothetical. My hands moved according to my nature. What I had done in the last room would never be undone. It couldn’t be written off or counter weighted, it was a fact.
I was sick of sitting here, agonizing over what the answer was and what consequence would follow. The hospital had purposefully brought me here to show my actions, and I had already made my judgments on them. So yes, a character clearly could be judged before their story ended.
I pressed Y and then hit enter.
999:364:23:59:59
In the middle of the screen a timer began counting down.
Was it the right answer or the wrong answer? I glanced around the room to see if anything else had changed, nothing. I tried typing onto the keyboard but there was no reaction. I couldn’t tell if I was fortunate, missing something or if this was a punishment.
In my confusion I sat there and watched the seconds count down. A thousand years was a long time. A sense of dread came with the realization, staying here for a thousand years. It had to be a punishment, that was unless the other answer led to something horrific. Another thought came, it could be that it's given me that long to find an ending, in which case it is good. The only way I’d be able to know for sure is to meet someone who had been here that long, I didn’t like the odds of that. Even if I met one, how could I tell the difference between them and a liar? My mind spiraled from the implication.
Then I heard a door open loudly. I jumped up from the seat and prepared for whatever was about to happen. I carefully approached the doorway, then peeking through I saw a familiar corridor with 270A approaching from the other end. They looked far but I knew how fast the creature could move. I gave one last hateful look towards the computer and then dashed into the corridor.
The issue of the timer was pushed to the back of my mind as I ran through the doorway. There was no brown trail on the floor this time, at least not between 270A and myself. It didn’t seem to have any urgency, but I wasn’t going to take any chances with it. I passed the many patients' doors and windows without so much of a glance. My focus went purely to finding an exit, after running a good distance I could see a branching corridor on the left side and an adjacent door that was open just a crack. An anomaly.
I was relieved to get to the crossroads much faster than 270A. It was inching forward in the distance and looked a lot more grub-like than I’d noticed before, or like a particularly stubby worm. I had the luxury of time to make a decision for what felt like the first time since I arrived. There was still a compulsion to keep my eye on it, but I forced myself to look around.
To my left was the cafeteria, I could only see an empty table from this viewpoint. I wondered if 3840 would be around to fill me in on what would happen now. It was one of the more reasonable options I could take but not my only one. I turned around and first noticed the hallway behind me was gone, instead only a wall filled the way I had come, but then pulled at the door. It did not match those of the patients, it was made of a darker wood and had no accompanying window.
It took some effort and with a heave the door opened. Poking my head in I saw two rows of three empty beds with machines next to them. There was no other doorway which struck me as odd, but I wondered if that meant I just couldn’t see it. Then I noticed it, the first window I’d seen directly connected to the hospital. It looked like pure black outside, but then I caught sight of a glow that passed by quickly. Something was out there. It was a risky bet, but it could be an exit.
Pulling my head back I turned and saw that 270A was really exerting themselves, now that they were getting closer. I’d taken long enough to weigh up my options. Make my way to the cafeteria and hope 3840 is still around or take a chance on this strange new room.
[[Enter The Cafeteria]]
[[Enter The Right Room]] Something about this situation rubbed me the wrong way. First the playback of my time here, highlighting the decisions I made for my own survival, then asking about a ‘character.’ It was like a prosecutor asking leading questions.
I got a feeling it was asking permission to judge me. If not that then it might be asking me to judge myself. I refused. I pushed down the N key then had my finger hover over the enter button, but I felt the need to speak first to whatever was clearly watching me, to whatever was setting trap after trap and had not yet caught me for good.
Whether you’re a demon or a god I don’t care, I don’t want a part of this anymore. If you’re trying to show me death is a kindness in the face of eternity, congratulations, I get it now. I’m ready to move on.
I hit the enter key. Sitting back I closed my eyes and waited. Nothing. Nothing happened. I opened my eyes. I was still here, sitting in the office in front of the computer, it wasn’t over yet. I noticed a device had appeared next to the keyboard and the text on the screen had changed too.
Scan hand to gain access.
Access to what was my first thought but I placed my hand on the device. A light scanned from left to right then went dark.
Access granted.
I looked up from the screen and saw there was a new corridor ahead. It was also short, but at the end was a patient's room, the number was 103C. I got up and ran over, I could see my body and my family frozen in the glow of candlelight. I tried the door. Locked. Then I noticed the handscanner next to it. After placing my hand I heard a click and I pushed down on the handle to enter.
For the first time in a very long time I felt peace. An ease of mind. This was where I was supposed to be. Seeing myself on the bed was still a little strange, I had gotten so small, as if I’d had all my insides sucked out except for my bones. Though it was a razor thin silver lining, it had been great to move again in a body with flexibility and strength, and of course, without pain
Then I turned to the family members, how lucky was I to be surrounded by love in these final moments? I relished it, just for a moment longer. My time to move on had long passed. It was time to put myself to rest.
As I stood at my own bedside, I thought about just climbing into my own body. I waved my hand over myself and felt a sort of force like magnetism drawing me in. Before I moved any closer something caught my eye. Next to the open photo album was a polaroid camera. There was that last empty space I could fill.
[[Take The Final Picture]]
[[Climb Into My Body]] I would carry with me no regrets. It was time to bid the world and all that I loved in it farewell. Picking up the camera, I leaned a little further back from my bed and brought the viewfinder to my eye.
It was haunting, in a beautiful way. The light of the candles from below darkened most of my family's eyes, as if to emphasise their sadness. My side of the room was dimmer, with the darkness in the top left corner above my bed splitting the room diagonally, as if to highlight the amount of life left my family.
I pressed the button on the camera and with a click and a flash, a photo began to print. Shaking the picture, I wished that this picture would somehow find its way to the real photo album if this were not it. Then I placed it inside the album, carefully lining it up to position it properly amidst the others.
It didn’t feel right to leave it open now that it was completed. I gently lifted the left side of the album and brought it to a close, and as soon as it was done I found myself back in my hospital bed. A warm hand still on my shoulder.
“I rarely get to savour this kind of sweetness. You have been a treat.”
I hear a finger snap and I am hit by the sledgehammer of mortality. I reenter the flow of time and a flood of sensations fight for my attention, but I simply lie back and breathe out. I’m slipping away, deeper and deeper. I am no longer able to think. Just a comfortable blank awareness.
For a long time I am stillness. Then I am spreading out, a force is pulling me into the sky and I am spreading into the air. Mixing with the sky, becoming my own wide cast cloud, until I feel part of me falling to the ground and joining earth and sky.
In the end I had become unbound peace. Had I a mind, and a mind that could think, I would have given thanks to my family that they had chosen cremation over burial.
Could it be that my body yearns for the return of my soul? I take a step closer and as I lean over, it gets harder and harder not to get pulled in.
Then I have the thought, why am I resisting. I fall into myself and like water finding its own level, I flow into my natural shape. It feels right, this is where I should be. My family stands frozen, I’ve kept them waiting long enough. They have their own lives to live.
The warm hand on my shoulder becomes clear, I feel them squeeze a little as I hear them laugh.
“In a rush are you? Funny.”
I hear a finger snap and I feel death's weight on my chest, but I am afraid, a single question in my mind. What’s funny?
I’m clinging to life but my grip is slipping. I don’t understand. The pain intensifies, I can’t hold on any longer. Letting go I breathe out and slip deeper and deeper into the abyss. It is a pleasant sort of shadow over the mind. Quiet.
My eyes are open, I’m hit by a familiar pain. It's excruciating but I’m more confused. How am I alive?
Then it comes, it's the same as before. A building pressure deep within my ribcage. I close my eyes and hope it will be for the last time. Breathing out, I feel it again. My consciousness is fading, everything is okay. I’m free.
It’s like being blasted by a train's horn only to wake up on the tracks. It's sudden, jarring and it’s too late to do anything meaningful. I’m back in the hospital and I realise it now. I have all the time in the world, but only one breath to live on. The pain is bad, but the relief is better. I lie back and breathe out.
It happens a fourth time, a tenth time, then I lose track. Why count the seconds in eternity? Instead sometimes I laugh, although not for long. Other times I see how far I can make it off the bed, or try to get my family to laugh, then I wonder if the little games make me crazy or keep me sane. I play less and less now, most of the time I just enjoy the rest that I get.
I will find peace forever, but never own it. That is enough.
It was too mundane, too inconspicuous. There had to be a reason this room appeared now of all times. Perhaps a secret was hiding somewhere among the beds or window. I entered giving one final glance at 270A which stopped rushing over. A good sign, I stepped in and pulled the door closed behind me. This door had a small gap between it and the floor, but I turned my attention to the room.
I walked over to the closest bed. The machine next to it had a blank screen with buttons on the side. The device was sitting on a set of drawers with wheels. I tried to move it. They might as well have been nailed to the ground. I saw the electrode pads on the nicely made bed and tried to connect them to my arm. After they failed to stick I tried other places but no matter where I tried there was no reaction besides sliding off.
Discouraged, I left the heart monitors alone. I tried the drawers on this machine, then a couple others, but they were as good as decorative. Nothing seemed interactable. I was starting to think I should just open the door and run across to the cafeteria, but the window had yet to be investigated.
It was a peculiar sight. The air shifted more akin to ink in water. There were thicker wisps of the dark substance than in other places, but I could only tell due to a very dull luminescence shining from behind it. I wasn’t mistaken earlier, there was definitely something out there.
I tapped on the window and I heard and felt glass. It reverberated with my tap. A sense of fragility. Tapping again a few times I waited to see if there would be any reaction, but the light oscillated consistently with and without provocation. I wracked my mind trying to think of another way to test the waters or gain further insight on what was out there. Nothing came to mind.
As I stood around I thought I heard a noise come from outside the door and I was glad I closed it. I quietly walked back over and bent to put my hands on the ground, before taking a look under the gap. I saw the light of the corridor disappear on the left side of the crack. 270A was out there. Having my main exit sealed was unfortunate, but there was nothing to do about that now.
Very slowly I pushed myself back onto my feet. My options were slim. I really hoped the creature couldn’t open doors, so I explored my options for a place to hide, just in case it came in. There were six, each bed had a space beneath it I could slide myself, but I had a feeling it wouldn’t do me a whole lot of good. Without being able to move the furniture I was also unable to make a barricade. I hadn’t tried the ceiling yet.
I stepped onto a bed and then the heart monitor next to it. I got up and balanced myself, then pushed up on the cork board squares above me. They didn’t budge. I was trapped. Then I caught movement in the corner of my eye.
270A was somehow pushing itself under the gap in the door. It was slow, but steadily its mass was shifting and inflating the portion of itself on this side like a rotten meat balloon. I frantically looked around and searched under the beds, behind the machines and even back out the window. There was nothing new.
I realised now that I was most certainly caught. If I wanted to have even a small chance to get out of this then I needed to make a plan now. I sat on the middle bed next to the window. The room was feeling smaller and smaller as 270A increased in size. There was a chance, no matter how small, that I could bait the creature into coming for me and I could escape out the door. It wouldn’t be easy, but it also wasn’t impossible.
The window was the other obvious choice. If I were to try to break it, anything could be outside this hospital. There was the fact that it would be more likely a permanent choice, whereas getting eaten by this creature was a temporary sentence.
I felt a deep regret for entering here as I watched 270A begin stretching itself further into the room. Again I’d been faced with two bad options, although this time I did have myself to blame. Closing my eyes for a second I tried to calm myself. There was no longer time to think. Window or escape.
[[Smash The Window]]
[[Try Escape]] I stepped back from the door. There was no need to corner myself now, especially when weighed against all the questions I had for 3840. The significance of the countdown being at the top of that list.
As I walked away, it felt like the hospital itself was always trying to tempt me into making bad decisions. For now it was a gentle whisper, but I also feared that the pattern wouldn’t hold. Perhaps one day it would insist. I was comforted by the fact that there were others who were braving the corridors with me. Finding the will to go on alone in this place was already hard, and it would only get harder if I had a thousand years ahead of me.
I picked up my pace as both 270A and I were approaching the corner. Without its trail to slide on it was a bit of a pitiful sight. Its legless body dragging itself around, too much friction to snake its way forward. Something I became grateful for as I came out a distance ahead of it and approached the open doors.
The barebones kitchen was directly ahead of the doors this time. Unexpected, but still a welcome sight. That was until I entered the cafeteria proper. It was awestriking and eerie, the room was massive and filled with patients at tables all in complete stillness. A place time had abandoned, or at least taken a long vacation away from.
Almost all the nearby tables were full, so I took a little run up and jumped up from the side of the nearest one and surveyed the room. Most patients rested their heads in their hands or laid down on their arms, a smaller portion stared down or at the wall ahead, very few froze while standing or lying down. I looked further out to my right and as my vision dragged along I saw a horizon of a hundred tables. No, more than that.
I could see a small square in the far distance, which I presumed to be the exit to the next corridor. I jumped back down to the checkered floor and began the trek over. It seemed unlikely that 3840 would be here and if he was he would have called out. To see so many people catatonic, or maybe despondent was the better word, did have me wonder if it wasn’t just low morale. Maybe there was a good reason so many people decided to stay here.
Halfway towards the door I heard a loud thump from a table far away on my left. The echo passed me and then was chased by a second louder sound. I dropped into a crouch and hid behind a table. I chided myself for getting too relaxed. Maybe this wasn’t a safe zone, maybe it wasn't even a cafeteria at all. 270A hadn’t followed me in, but that could be because there was something even it feared.
The exit was still far away, it would take a while, but if I kept low I could make myself hard to find. I suddenly realised how great a hiding spot under these tables was. Just as I was about to wiggle myself under one, I heard a voice shouting.
“I did it. I did it! I’m free! Hahahaha.”
I peeked over someone's shoulder and saw another patient standing on a table fist pumping. It was the first time I’d seen a patient so animated, so happy. When they began to dance, I made up my mind and decided that this was most likely a real person and finally stood up myself.
They seemed too ecstatic to notice my approach, after a minute or so of walking I got up to the table where the celebration was still going strong. Their eyes were shut and they were humming a song along with throwing their arms about.
Now that I’d arrived, I didn’t really know what to say. After a moment the words slipped out.
Hey ther-.
They screamed and reacted instantly. The height and distance they made with that single jump was impressive. The landing, however, was not. They launched into the space between two sitting patients with one leg sticking out over the bench and another under the table, all while their body folded forward.
I quickly came to their aid and grabbing one of their arms helped pull them up. Their eyes were wide and stared at me. Our bodies weren’t capable of shock, but that expression possessed more than fear and surprise.
“What. Why! What?” Surprise, anger and then finally confusion.
Hi. I’m 103C. I’m new around here and just wanted to ask a few questions. That's all.
As the patient was pulled to their feet their eyes took a more natural look and they grabbed my shoulders, “I’m free! At last I am free!”
Free from what?
“The dream. A dream of flesh and blood and mortality. Of paws and jaws and maws. I’m free but not them. You see them sit, yes, but they are buffet tables. They sit not to eat, but to be eaten. Eaten forever” He laughed and spun away in another direction.
I tried to ask more questions, but he just laughed and spun. Fell over and then continued. So I stopped following them and pushed on towards the room's exit. I didn’t like the sound of becoming food even if it was a dream. What I did question was why there were so many people sitting if that was the case. Were these people tricked, or was that ‘dream’ preferable to what awaited me outside?
After a fair amount of walking I made it to the doors. I could still hear laughing at times, the occasional crash soon to follow. Finally standing there I could see a rather daunting looking hallway, similar to the first one I’d arrived in. It was quite narrow and had a green tinge. There was also an open seat at the closest table, just a couple steps away. If it could be escaped, then the dream was temporary, even if potentially terrible. Neither choice excited me, but a choice still had to be made.
[[Begin To Wander The Corridors]]
[[Sit Down]] I understood the hospital better now. Even the ‘safe zone’ with the most people I’d seen gathered, was itself just its own trap. At least that was how I interpreted it for now. It was possible many people chose it over wandering the corridors because the other rooms never let go. They could awake from a dream, but there was no waking from eternity. Dreaming was an option I could explore if in my thousand years I fell into great boredom.
Staring into the corridor I only felt dread. I didn’t have even a drop of curiosity, not that it would be enough to fuel my motivation, no amount could get me over the hump of my own trepidation. It was simply a necessity.
As much as I wished for an alternative, becoming psychic livestock somehow held even less appeal. Stepping out I heard the laughing cut off immediately and I knew the cafeteria was gone. The quiet was a welcome change. At first, that is. I checked behind me only to see the corridor extended out in both directions now. To be so on edge with only your own footsteps to keep you company is a curse. To name that curse in no uncertain terms, paranoia.
I walked forward and took turn after turn, listening carefully, waiting for the moment something changed. Yet it stretched on, countless steps closer to something I could only imagine. Now I began to think this was the real hospital, and I was now firmly caught in its web, it had no reason to rush to get me.
The relief I felt approaching a four-way intersection faded in moments. There was a different sort of mounting weight pressed upon sanity, when I looked down four connecting corridors and saw the exact same indistinct endlessness. I could have closed my eyes and spun around and lost track of where I’d come from, but what was worse was thinking that even if I did backtrack, it may not matter in the slightest.
So I kept walking forward without turning. At times I thought I heard a second set of steps, other times I thought there was a sound besides my echo. I began to feel the constant need to look over my shoulder. Stopping periodically trying to catch out whatever might be tailing me. This was bad, but could not compare to the moment when it worked.
It was just one step out of sync.
I turned and saw the same endless empty corridor, but I knew it now. I wasn’t insane and I wasn’t alone. Walking again I pretended I didn’t hear it. The ruse had to be maintained. It might strike if it realised I knew it was there. My walking speed would quicken and I would slow again, then I would stop and test it like before, only to soon catch myself walking too quickly. I might have been able to maintain the act better, only now I caught it every time.
The only strand of reason that kept me from tearing off in absolute hysteria or trying to desperately confront the noise was that it never sounded closer.
What was worse than an end was no end. I realised my fear now was the same I’d clung to when I was dying. I could no longer do it. This torture of fleeing the unknown was too great a burden. I snapped.
I lay down in the middle of the corridor and laughed. How far I had walked in absolute terror, only to get nowhere, only to finally give in.
I’m done now. Come get me. You win.
I closed my eyes and heard footsteps approaching.
There was a sudden light I could see behind my eyelids. I was ready, whatever came next I was ready. I opened my eyes slowly, as they adjusted I saw the square-shaped fluorescent lights above me. A variation of the ceiling I’d seen before. I sat up and I was in a new corridor.
It wasn’t over.There had to be a good reason so many were here. Gathering more information in a temporary existence beat blindly chancing a permanent one. That being said, I needed to find out how the other patient got free. It at least couldn’t hurt to try to ask before making such a big decision.
He had stopped spinning now and was running past tables and slapping the back of other patients' heads. After getting close I tried running beside and calling after the madman, but he ignored my calls. So instead I tried to anticipate his movements. I was wrong several times and had to reposition, until on the fifth try he finally headed towards me.
It was obvious he had every intention to run right through me, he didn’t acknowledge my presence in any way. I bent my knees and leant forward. I would catch him. When he was two steps away I leapt forward, grabbed behind his knees, lifted him up, then slammed him to the ground.
For a moment his legs kicked and I thought he was trying to push me off, it then became clear he was still trying to run while flat on his back. A couple seconds later he seemed to wake up and then craned his neck to look at me.
“You again. What do you want now?”
As he fell still I released him and stood before offering a hand.
I just had a question, I’m about to enter the dream you just woke from, but before I do I wanted to ask how you got free and why only you.
He grabbed my hand and got to his feet, his eyes took on a dark and serious look. Then he began pointing to different patients,
“That one's a chicken, this one a cow and that one a pig. They feared the pain and learned to numb the mind.”
He lifted a finger and began to push it behind his left eye up to the last knuckle. Leaning forward to show it better as his eye was bulging to the side, he pulled it back out.
“You cannot. You will be food until you learn to not be food. They are livestock, their value is in being eaten.” Looking down in disdain he slapped the back of the closest head.
Then he grabbed my head suddenly with his thumbs pushing into my cheekbones, “You must be a man, with a value to distinguish you from meat. While they run and hide you must befriend and work until you earn a place in their societies. That is why I am here, and they are there.”
He’d shaken my head with each sentence, but now he released me and looked lost for a moment before his gaze lowered, “I had friends, families even. My deaths washed away at dawn, their lives washed by time. There are some blessings to being immortal, burying each person you dare to love is not one of them. It was time for the dream to end.”
Then he looked up with a large smile and took off running, extending both arms to slap heads on both sides as he went, “Eeeeeeeternity won’t you maaaaaaaaarry meeeeeeee.”
I watched as with one final laugh, he made a turn and ran straight out into the corridor. After he was gone I snapped back into myself and tried to assess the information. If he weren’t lying or crazy, which I did have some doubts on, then escaping the dream had to do with how you related to the dream residents. That and the rest I would have to piece together once I got in there.
I’d stalled enough. The information felt valuable, but there was nothing I could do with it here. At the closest table there was one seat available in the middle so I went and sat and tried to mentally prepare myself.
After a long time I started to wonder what I was doing wrong. I was still here in the cafeteria. I put my head down on my arms like many of the others, and began to think about what I should do when I arrive. Thought after thought came until I lost track of myself and I realised I heard the sound of birds chirping.
I breathed in and smelt the indistinct sweet scent of nature. Sitting up I saw I had been leaning on a small boulder and the trunks of several large trees around me. I’d never seen so many stars and I could just see the edges on the few sparse clouds turning pink. On my right was a sloped dirt trail that winded down towards a structure that may have been ten to twenty kilometres away. It was circular and possibly white, layered upwards like the top half of a beehive. There was only one torchlit entrance I could see and it was open.
There was movement, shuffling from my left, off the path. I crouched behind the small boulder and listened.
“-choose one already.” I could just make out from a nearby whisper.
“The curves got to be right, I already told you why. Here like this one.” An annoyed voice replied.
I looked over the boulder and saw two naked men, one a head taller than the other. They both had muddy feet and seemed to be on high alert, in an instant they went still. One slowly began to look around. I wondered if they really were more like animals now and stood up.
Hey, you’re both patients from the hospital right?
The two relaxed immediately. After staring at me looking confused they turned to each other.
“Another one came to the table. You don’t recognise them do you?” The tall one asked.
“Nah gotta be a fresh catch. Spose we’re stuck with the baby tonight.” The shorter one shook their head.
They motioned me to come over and the tall guy snapped a curved twig from a tree, tried to bend it and touched the sharper end. He seemed satisfied with the result and turned around.
“Him, then you and then you need to do mine. Don’t forget to account for the curve and do it short. The motion is just like unlocking a door. Now watch carefully.” The taller one said before walking over to me.
“Listen, we’re taking care of you tonight. You’ll be in good hands. Just trust us and it will all be okay. We’ll explain as we go.”
He put his left hand on top of my head and pulled my top left eyelid back. After he told me to look up I did, which was immediately followed by a sharp pain and a popping sensation behind my eye. A second later I realised whatever happened was already over and I didn’t really mind. There was a dull throb I could feel, but even if it was like a pain, it didn’t matter.
“See that, no damage to the eye. Very quick. No violent wiggles, just a single twist after a bit of practice.”
“Whatever, do mine already.” The shorter man replied.
I watched them both take turns pushing a stick behind each other's eye and twisting it. They gained a sort of dumb smile afterwards. I felt my own face and I was surprised I had one too. My mind was sort of floaty, like a happy mist.
We were suddenly wandering the woods as it was getting darker. After finding some sturdy sticks, we began digging a shallow hole which they got me to lay in, put a hollow stick in my mouth, then buried me. It was only then that I noticed how much I didn't really care.
Time passed quite peacefully until I felt my foot get kicked. Dragged out of the hole by my ankle I was surrounded by laughter.
“Found ourselves a meat potato. Should we eat them now or later? Got plenty to bring back already.”
I wiped the dirt from my face and looked around. Four man-like creatures were standing over me. Their skin was gray and had two slits instead of a protruding nose, giving a more skullish look to their heads.
The four seemed in disagreement. One pulled me to my feet, raised my arm, then brought a cleaver down on my collarbone. They wrenched the blade out and began hacking with poor accuracy. I watched and began to laugh at the terrible job they were doing, which prompted the other members to look over
“First time?” The words slipped out reflexively.
The side of the cleaver slapped the side of my face but I heard the others start critiquing the creature's method. After my arm was separated I was thrown into a cage on wheels where other men and women sat. A burning sensation spread across my arm where it no longer sat. I looked out and saw my severed arm on a rock next to a campfire.
I was getting dizzy, weaker. I saw the blood continuing to shoot out of my shoulder. I lost most awareness besides sensation. The near simultaneous piercing sensations led me to believe I was consumed by more than three creatures.
Suddenly it was cold and I was staring down at the snow. The memories of the night before hit me like a rubber band stretched back a mile away. I felt like I woke from a lucid nightmare but it did not fade and I didn’t have to try to recall it. It was just there. Vividly.
I shivered and sat in the snow. The trade off was clear, I could live in the daze of a nightmare, unable to think properly but also unable to process the pain. Or, I could live fully, feel fully and try to build a life in this new dream world.
It wasn’t a choice. It was a golden opportunity. Skills, knowledge and competence, these were the weapons of mankind. I would be my own inheritor, my own ancestor, a new type of monster in a world that only saw livestock. I would learn to master the dream.
With the force of my desperate fist the illusion of glass gave way to a membrane. In a split second a wetness spread upward along my forearm and tightened. The room itself stretched before I was taken in by the vacuum and ejected.
I found myself floating towards a pillar of white light. Streaks of distinct white were launching towards the inky darkness that covered a labyrinthine structure, it looked like I was inside a squared version of a tangled ball of black yarn with an altered plasma globe inside. One white streak struck me like lightning, and I felt the texture of thought, a memory that wasn’t mine of a festival with bright colors and painted faces. The energy left through my legs and I looked behind me to see it strike a rod outside the window I’d left. It illuminated the dark and I saw the outline of the window.
Turning back to the light, I thought of a white hot knitting needle that had pierced through the yarn ball. There was no end above or below. I continued to float closer and began to see a texture comprising the bright pillar. It reminded me of a carcass I’d been by the side of the road once when I was young, white maggots crawling over and under each other, white on white, the movement more distinct than the individual forms.
Then I heard it, a gentle dissonance. I had thought it as silent as pitch black is dark but then I continued closer. The voices had all been too loud to hear any number over the total mass of screaming. As the momentum drew me closer I clawed around me quickly to find nothing but air. The gentle dissonance turned into a screaming equivalent of static.
In my panic I began spinning. I could no longer maintain any orientation turned to black with a flashing white. It became clear, I was a sky diver with no parachute. A gravity bound reunion was inevitable. Fate had already been written, yet I’d never been so tortured by the ink drying.
I shut my eyes.
The light continued to flash behind my eyelids so I covered them with my hands and curled up. I wondered if I would make a splash. Then I lost the sound of my own mind as the static became chaos as sung through human vocals. Each of my rotations was now the beat by which my collision counted down.
Impact stirred me from my stasis. I lost all connection to my body and I became a visual awareness alone. I saw a corridor and felt the intention to brighten it, and did so before me. Each question I had was sucked out of my mind before it properly formed. Instead a will impressed upon me specifications, colors and details.
Even the realisation I was having at that moment slipped away before I could process it. So I tried to rebel, darkening the corridor with the intent to make it lightless. I was rewarded by the feeling of a tear ripping into my soul. A warning shot. Then I realised why I’d heard so many screams. I lightened the corridor again. Added fidelity and new details, a doorway here, shadows there. The spiritual equivalent of a suture began to put me back together.
Whatever was sending me its intent dragged my awareness to the end of a hallway. There ahead was a large empty space. Above the door an empty label that I could feel it wanted me to fill. I noticed as I thought through different hospital rooms and wards that it didn’t steal these thoughts away, it wanted me to plan. It even permitted me to think my new realisation aloud. I had been turned into software.
It was turning us all into the architects of nightmares.
3840 slides another inch away, but I won’t let the monsters take him. Grounding my legs I take a solid stance and reach for their back. They’re jolted forward, just out of reach and I grab only air.
Just as I’m about to lean further forward over the line, I feel five different hands wrap around each arm. I’m pulled forward, over the line and instantly the illusion evaporates. With the smoke gone, the room takes on a dim blue hue, it feels cold. There’s just under twenty patients shambling around, many with vacant expressions.
Before me I see the one in the place where the fake 3840 was struggling. She turns around with a bored expression. “Ssssstoopid” She said mockingly. Then turns away, I notice the horde are all shambling over to open drawers and lying down.
Turning around I see the real 3840, shaking their head only a few metres away. I see that I was on the final corner, I run over and slam into an invisible wall. Standing back up I trace my way around and I see him hold his hand up.
“I’m afraid that’s as far as you’ll go. It’s not the worst place to end up, you can trust me on that. I just hope you have a way to keep your mind active or you’ll end up like them.” He said pointing over at a few of the patients who were bumping into each other while trying to find a place to lie down.
There must be a way out? Please, isn't there something you can do?
“Buddy I told you not to cross the line, to stick behind me. It would have been a breeze had you just followed those simple instructions. Once you pass over you pass over, but don’t worry I’ll come visit. I get a feeling we’ll both be starved for good conversation.”
With that 3840 walked out of the room with a waving gesture thrown over their shoulder. Then he was gone. I traced the invisible barrier, but it was no good. I noticed the path was raised above the rest of the concrete ground by a few centimetres. Not that it did me a lot of good. Across the other side of the path I could see two patients looking at me. I waved to them, but they just turned around and walked away.
With nothing to do I walked back over to the drawers and saw one was left open. I really hoped that they all went in for a reason, maybe we could sleep? As I lay down it closed automatically. I waited for a few minutes expecting something to happen, but nothing did. I was just lying in a small pitch black space. I tried to get out but no matter where I pushed nothing changed.
I thought for a long time until I got sick of thinking. A moment came, the last debate with myself before I decided to put my mind at ease by meditating. Perhaps the decay of my own mind would be my liberation from eternity.
I walk past the scene and center myself within the path. Despite how real it sounds, I remind myself it is not real. I come to another corner, this one turning right. The back of 3840 slams against an invisible barrier and I hear him beg to pull him in. It’s too obvious now, they realise it too and with my back to them the sounds stop.
I follow the path around and to much relief see the square light of a doorway piercing through the smoke. There leaning on one side is a figure casually waiting. My final few steps are some of the most painful, I hear screams, pleas, roars and other terrible noises all at once, but the moment I cross through the door they all vanish.
“Wasn’t so bad now, was it?”
It was, without a doubt, ranking as one of the worst experiences I’d had. I gave him a strange look. I couldn’t tell if was meant to be mocking, encouraging, or if he was just being glib.
Next time I think I’ll take my chances with the asylum.
“Hopefully you won’t be sticking around long enough to have the choice, but in case you are, don’t.”
It was the first time I’d heard him sound so stern. I was curious, then decided not to press the issue. If I hadn’t met him I might just be climbing into one of those drawers in the room behind me. There was no need to rock the boat.
Alright I swear I won’t. Now why do you hope I won’t be around long?
3840 began to walk away shaking his head, “Don’t you want to find your happily ever after? Let me put it this way, if that’s the least bad room in this damn place and you didn’t like it, exploring the rest isn’t going to be a treat now is it?”
I followed after him and finally took stock of my surroundings. The corridor seemed endless and much wider than the ones before. Then my foot stuck to the ground, specifically to some brown trail that I now saw was taking up about seventy percent of the corridor. Then I noticed 3840 wasn’t walking, he had one foot on the trail and was pushing off the normal ground with his other foot.
Pulling my foot free I began to walk on the side. This corridor had numbered doors and windows looking into patient rooms. The one next to me had a lot of equipment, the bed was empty but there were a few people and a doctor frozen in time around it.
3840 had slid ahead and seemed to be looking into each room until I saw him make a U-turn and start coming back. While I waited I just looked into the window across the corridor. This one didn’t have a hospital room, instead I was staring out into space, more specifically a strangely colorful planet. I jumped across the brown trail and took a closer look.
It was uncanny, before my eyes was a giant planet with two smaller blue stars orbiting it on different sides. In our universe it couldn’t exist, so I became sure it wasn’t. I leaned in to look closer and felt the pull as my vision fell into its gravity. I came down through an orange sky and saw there were cities, their architecture consisted of mainly white and some red stone and flowed with red energy. Around them were a motley of dark yellow, brown and grey fields. It all looked like an alien computer that was linked together by crystalline highways.
My vision pulled closer again, past great towers and buildings until I was within the bounds of an amphitheatre. I moved out from my place in the crowd and closer to the two men who were addressing the crowd. They both then turned to each other, stern and serious, then a force shot out from between them and collided in the middle. I noticed it came specifically from their heads and saw they had both replaced one eye with red crystal.
In the space this force met, a square shape blew up as though to show the crowd and I saw a 3d design begin to emerge from both sides. I could not hear their words but I could see both took turns calling out to each other and the crowd. The designs were both changing and at first I thought it was a duel. Then I noticed they were correcting each other, and the form of a device began to build in the middle of this conjured space.
Then I noticed something peculiar, despite the age difference and hair colour they looked like family. Looking at the next closest person, a guard perhaps, he may have been too young to be a brother but could have been one of their sons. I decided to give a second look to the crowd, it was the same even between men and women. They all had the same face.
I fought the gravity and pulled back and found I could move my vision to another section of the planet. I scanned and jumped in and out of places until I found large streams of smoke. Once I got close again I poured over a battlefield. I saw a dead man's face on a thousand bodies. The facial hair, the colour of eyes, skin and clothes changed, but there was no unseeing it now. There was just enough nurture to make the difference.
I’d seen enough. I tried to pull back and I succeeded with some effort, then I kept pulling and did not return to my body, instead I was faced with a detailed constellation of an eye. Then as I drew back further I was eying the constellation of a face. His face, drawn in starlight. I marvelled for a moment then closed my eyes instead. The connection between me and the window ended, it was a hand gently releasing my own.
Now I was back in the corridor. I felt a bit mentally drained and went to lean up against the wall when I noticed the room we’d come from was gone. In its place was a stairway with a light that flickered every few seconds. The brown trail in this corridor stopped a metre before its entrance, the stairwell wasn’t inviting, but as I took a step closer I felt a hand hit my shoulder.
“That’s a one way trip you’re looking at. I wouldn’t recommend it, but now that I know your room number. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t the teensiest bit curious to see what might happen this time. I sure won’t be joining you.”
All signs pointed to this being a bad idea, but I felt a lingering allure, a dark fascination. I couldn’t explain it to myself, perhaps that was the danger of it. Then there was this corridor, row upon row of patient rooms, and of course 3840. It felt safer here.
[[Stay Upstairs]]
[[Go Downstairs]] If the roof had collapsed up ahead then the time I had left in this corridor was shortening. I wanted to explore further, maybe find some more clues about this place and how it worked, but if falling debris would chase me out soon then I was quite alright leaving on my own terms.
I began making my way back, ensuring not to step in the brown trail. My echoes were all I had for company, but they were also a reminder that this was a solo journey. There was probably a good answer to why it was there. Given how the trail extended into the horizon I doubted it was human related. At least I hoped that was the case. For all I knew it could be what comes out when you pop open one of these soul bodies. I didn’t like the thought of being squeezed like an endless packet of barbeque sauce, but the trail was too uniform for that to be the case.
Shaking the silly thoughts from my mind I reached the end of the brown trail and noticed how much darker it was through the doorway. The lighting was dimmer for a start and the grey stairs didn’t contribute a lot to the overall atmosphere. It wasn’t like it was too dark to find my way, back in the real world I probably wouldn’t have given it a second glance, but for a moment I found myself second guessing stepping inside.
Giving a final glance down the corridor I noticed it looked the same if not a little shorter. If the roof really was collapsing then it should have changed its color or shape in some way. A mystery I would gladly put behind me, as long as I left soon. It made taking the first step a lot easier.
I turned and began to make my way down. The grey concrete walls and flickering light gave me the impression of heading to a basement level. After reaching the landing between the two floors, I turned around and saw there were no longer any stairs up, just a plain concrete wall. I had been sealed off.
Each few seconds the light flickered and I was left in true darkness for a brief moment. My eyes darted around, expecting a change, anticipating a reason to run that didn’t come. I turned the corner and saw at the end of the set of stairs were two open doors. The lights flickered randomly and at a greater frequency in the next section. I was suddenly reminded of the morgue, I wondered if the hospital itself wanted me to be afraid. It was working.
I continued down slowly and quietly. This allowed me to hear the ringing of thin metal and the sound of sloshing water. From halfway down the stairs I detected movement, I crept further and saw a mop, a bucket and grey clothed legs. My muscles tensed as I got closer, I was ready to bolt at the drop of a hat.
I forced myself to edge forward and as my foot touched the last step I began quickly checking for danger. There were six janitors. Flash. Six eyeless faces had turned to me. The light held for a moment and they all stood unmoving. Flash. They had all looked away. They were human-shaped, but their stiff jointed positions resembled wooden drawing figures. The left side had been cleaned, the right had the same brown trail as the last corridor, in the middle was a blackish puddle.
I tried to step back, but I felt the concrete wall had kept pace with me, there was no back any longer. I felt the urge to run, but clenched my hands and tried to calm down. They had all shifted as they cleaned and there were now four of them on the right side of the corridor, so I decided I would move leftward.
The janitors on the left had a wide enough gap in the middle to run in between them. If I wanted to make a clean and fast getaway, that was the way through. Then I noticed the pattern of the closest worker, their mop always stopping in an arc at some point in the center or the side of the corridor. If I stuck to the wall and timed it right, I could slide past and get by untouched.
[[Run Past]]
[[Stick To The Wall]] I jumped backwards just as the creature pounced. I crossed through the doorway and my arms came up to shield me as tendrils pursued, their ivory hooks whipping through the air. Then they stopped and flattened midair against the opening. A moment of skepticism passed immediately as the rest of the creature's body hit an invisible barrier and fell suddenly.
An angry gurgle came from the fleshy lump monster as it continued to push itself up against the doorway. I took several steps back until I bumped into something hard. I looked back and saw the handrail for the stairs.
I had lost my sense of space for a moment, when I turned back the corridor had disappeared. Instead before me was simply a blank concrete wall. It happened again. The walls conspiring again to keep me from going back. It was not a good feeling, to be a mouse in a maze of bad intentions.
Giving the staircase a scan, it seemed ‘safe,’ at least enough for the time being. Taking a seat at the top I let myself calm down. I’d survived two chases and wasn’t feeling rushed to go endure a third. I didn’t know what I was running towards, until now my motivation had just been to survive. Survive, wrong word, perhaps avoid an unfortunate fate? Perhaps the luckiest were those who die quickly and never come here.
I’d sat around long enough. There was a growing superstition I had, that if I stayed in one place too long, something would be sent to ‘motivate’ me. A theory I’d prefer to remain untested. I got up and closed my eyes for a moment. I could beat this. Whatever this was, I would make it to the end.
The grey concrete walls and flickering light gave me the impression of heading to a basement level. After reaching the landing between the two floors, I turned around and saw there were no longer any stairs up, just a plain concrete wall. I had been sealed off.
Each few seconds the light flickered and I was left in true darkness for a brief moment. My eyes darted around, expecting a change, anticipating a reason to run that didn’t come. I turned the corner and saw at the end of the set of stairs were two open doors. The lights flickered randomly and at a greater frequency in the next section. I was suddenly reminded of the morgue, I wondered if the hospital itself wanted me to be afraid. It was working.
I continued down slowly and quietly. This allowed me to hear the ringing of thin metal and the sound of sloshing water. From halfway down the stairs I detected movement, I crept further and saw a mop, a bucket and grey clothed legs. My muscles tensed as I got closer, I was ready to bolt at the drop of a hat.
I forced myself to edge forward and as my foot touched the last step I began quickly checking for danger. There were six janitors. Flash. Six eyeless faces had turned to me. The light held for a moment and they all stood unmoving. Flash. They had all looked away. They were human-shaped, but their stiff jointed positions resembled wooden drawing figures. The left side had been cleaned, the right had the same brown trail as the last corridor, in the middle was a blackish puddle.
I tried to step back, but I felt the concrete wall had kept pace with me, there was no back any longer. I felt the urge to run, but clenched my hands and tried to calm down. They had all shifted as they cleaned and there were now four of them on the right side of the corridor, so I decided I would move leftward.
The janitors on the left had a wide enough gap in the middle to run in between them. If I wanted to make a clean and fast getaway, that was the way through. Then I noticed the pattern of the closest worker, their mop always stopping in an arc at some point in the center or the side of the corridor. If I stuck to the wall and timed it right, I could slide past and get by untouched.
[[Run Past]]
[[Stick To The Wall]] My fingers slip down the sides of the handles.
Who could blame me? This was safety, an island in a sea of madness. From what 3840 had said, it only got worse from here, why rush to uncertain doom?
I felt myself step backward until a hand rested on my shoulder, “Had a feeling you might lose your nerve. Well don’t get too comfortable. I’ll introduce you to the others, but you really should get going soon.”
Turning my head I gave a small nod and I felt the grip on my shoulder tighten. 3840 gently pulled me over to the table where the two patients were deadlocked in each other’s gazes. We both took a seat across from each other and he pointed at the male patient.
“That’s 405G. Told me he was some trucker who fell asleep at the wheel, didn’t know how he made it to the hospital, but while getting a million volts to the heart he apparently did what we all did. He asked to live. Met him the same way I met you, just out in the hallway looking lost.” 3840 then leaned onto one palm, “But he mistook me for a demon and attacked me on sight. After a few minutes of my heckling he realised he couldn’t kill me. It took him a while to see the rest of us as people. It was actually when this one came along.” He said pointing to the female patient.
Okay?
I didn't have a lot to say. If there was a point, I couldn’t hazard a guess as to where it was hiding.
“Well one day he was in the hallways and much like I found him, he found her. When he went up to say hi she apparently kicked him square in the nuggets. That’s the point where he became certain that at least one other person was human. They made it to the cafeteria and grew sweet on each other. Every time I came back to this one they’d be talking, laughing and holding the other close. Until one day they weren’t.”
What did they fight about?
“She wanted them to leave, finally head out and be the first to find a joint eternity together. He told her they already had it right here. They didn’t appreciate my two cents, reality is that eternity is a lonely place and they don’t do pairs, not in this place. So against better judgement they started a staring contest, whoever wins decides. You’d think it a strange contest for two people in bodies that don’t need to blink, but now I see it differently, it's all about willpower. At first I thought he won since they’re here together, he would sit there and talk to her, but then she never replied. The eternal silent treatment.”
It doesn’t exactly sound smart, but also mostly harmless. There seem to be worse fates around than this.
“Well for now they’ve gone and trapped themselves. He thinks he’ll lose her forever the moment he looks away, but for all intents and purposes all he has currently is her image. As for her, I don’t know if it was spite or hope or something else that kept her there. She could have left any time, there wasn’t a binding vow or nothing to stop her. I reckon their minds have turned to mush.”
3840 leaned back and shook his head, “Doesn’t stop me from coming by and trying to talk sense into them, but it feels like talking to a headstone and I get about the same reaction.”
I clasped my hands and leaned forward onto the table. I eyed the two up for a moment and then spoke, “It’s not the worst thing in the world to sit with someone you love for eternity. It is kind of sweet that this is what they chose to do in the end.”
“They didn’t choose and neither of them would have chosen this. He would never have chosen her to stop talking. I’d skip out earlier than I’d like from my occasional rests here cause he wouldn’t stop yelling or pleading or whatever method it was that day. It’s not as easy to say for her, can’t speculate so much on silence, but I don’t believe she was happy. My point is that staying here is a compromise. Yours will be a whole lot sadder to look at though, like his.” 3840 said, pointing to the man in the corner.
“It may take some time, but if you don’t move on now then you may just become this room's new statue, and it's already got three more than it should.”
I looked over at the closed doors then hung my head. Boring was comfortable and safe. This bland room could shield me from all the horrors outside if I let it, and still a rational part of me did still want to go and brave the dangers. To seek out an eternity I could accept.
I felt the hand fall on my shoulder and give it a squeeze, “C’mon now. I believe you have some fight in ya yet.”
[[Give Up On Leaving]]
[[Leave Now]]
The doors swing open to a dimly lit corridor. It's unfinished, the floor is concrete and the walls still show the wooden frame that’s usually hidden. There were several bags of cement stacked up on the right side and a tipped over wheelbarrow further up in the middle, with its underside and wheel facing away. What unnerved me wasn’t that I could see people behind semiclear sheets of tarpaulin near the wheelbarrow, it’s what I heard behind them.
As clear as day a man’s whimper echoed through the hall, “Don’t do it doc, please just let me go.”
As I watch the backlit silhouette of a figure on what might be a bed struggling to free their legs and the other figure turning around, a sudden weight falls on my shoulder making me flinch, “This is the last bit of help you’ll get from me, take care 103C” I hear 3840 say.
Then before I can react he pushes me forward out of the cafeteria. After stumbling I catch myself and watch the scene before me continue to unfold.
“Nooooo stop!” The voice screams as I see a violent struggle.
I can make out that one is standing above the other, slowly lowering themself downward. I step forward, unsure of what to do, then hear the patient struggling before making a final gasp as the doctor violently sank down with victory.
“Shhh, there there. The pain will pass.” This new voice sounded menacing, with clearly no intention to comfort.
“Next!”
My eyes darted around, cement bags or wheelbarrow? Being closer to the wheelbarrow I took two steps forward and gently rolled my body inside as best as I could, curling up and bringing my knees to my chest. My head bent forward awkwardly against the backside near the handles, but it gave me a good view I hoped I wouldn’t need. I noticed where the doors to the cafeteria had been was now just a dark empty doorway of the same size.
I heard the tarpaulin roughly torn back and then nothing. After a minute I had begun to convince myself that the danger may have passed, then I saw a growing shadow stretch out in front of me followed by a loud bang on the side of the wheelbarrow. It took all I had not to jump, but I kept it together as I continued to watch and wait.
“The doctor will see you now, or shortly after I find you.”
I heard the foot scrape against the side of the wheelbarrow as it was removed. Then I heard the steps walking and saw the lab coat and legs move over to the cement bags and push the highest one off. It fell to the floor with an unceremonious thump. It then walked further towards the doorway and I saw its headless torso take a thinking pose.
With a “Hmm.” It began walking off into the darkness. I gave it five seconds before I unrolled myself and quickly headed behind the tarp. Just behind it, strapped to a gurney was a patient like myself with closed eyes. Their legs were strapped in, and in the middle of their chest was a large syringe. Around the room were varying power tools, some drills, a grinder and a jigsaw among others.
That’s when I noticed the trolley next to the gurney, it didn’t have any tools on it, but it did have limbs. There were some feet and hands, but there were half a dozen full arms and legs, many of which seemed to have different skin tones. For a moment I marveled at how strange it was that there was no blood or bone, just skin where there should be wounds. I shook my head to clear the thoughts, not the time, instead I put the jigsaw next to the patient’s arm and pulled out the needle.
I listened for footsteps, but couldn’t hear any so yanked the syringe out and saw their eyes flash open. They began to move around frantically knocking off the jigsaw. I managed to catch it just before it hit the ground, I stood and thrust the side of the tool into their chest hard. I felt their hands wrap around it and then turned and took off. The gurney stopped shaking and making noise before I heard the sound of the jigsaw.
Pushing through another set of tarps, I glanced back to see the doctor rush past the other patient and come straight after me. Any doubt I had about not staying to help longer disappeared as I looked ahead. The corridor was short and I was coming up on an intersection quickly.
I squinted as I struggled to read the dimly written signage. Radiology, Prosthetics Department. I winced at the possibilities, but wrestling a headless doctor was somehow lower on my priority list.
I heard the tarp behind me push open and I felt a minor relief that they weren’t yet within stabbing distance. Both choices held a potential I didn’t wish to explore, but I couldn’t stay here.
[[Choose Radiology ]]
[[Choose Prosthetics ]] No, I don’t.
The words slipped out. I pulled my shoulder free from 3840’s hand and laid my head into my arms. It reminded me of being young, trying to sneak an extra nap in during class. With closed eyes I ignored the world around me. Voices faded into the background, first 3840’s, then my own. It wasn’t tiredness, I knew I couldn’t sleep, but there was some other kind of lull that I could feel swelling inside me and pulling at my eyes.
My drifting away was then interrupted by a loud crack around the table. I was irritated by the interruption until I lifted my head and opened my eyes. It was bright and warm. The smoke blew into my eyes and I felt the nip of a flame and jumped back. I could smell again, it was a powerful and familiar scent of burning wood. I crouched and blinked in an attempt to regain my vision.
I’d been sitting on a stump and leaning against a log. Fire had already ignited the night and ate away at the forest to my left. I saw it beginning to surround me now so I scanned the scenery and found a safe direction. So then I ran, confused and afraid, but I felt the sensation of adrenaline. Touching my face I felt a nose and mouth and then coughed having inhaled a bit too much smoke. Stumbling, I managed to keep my feet despite the roots and kept running until I found a clearing.
Upon exiting the treeline I heard whispers. Two voices, too hushed to decipher. I crept closer. Without the fire light it was darker, but moonlight shone down without the canopy to block it. Grassy reeds blocked my view of whoever was lurking nearby, the tips of the foliage caught the light and turned an enchanting color of silver.
My approach was far from stealthy. The grass made a heavy rustling even as I tried to slowly pull myself in gently after planting each foot. The whispers went quiet.
Hello? I’m friendly. I just woke up here after falling asleep in a cafeteria.
The whispers started back up, the volume so low that I thought I could be imagining them. So I took further steps in and then I saw a human shape pop up out of the grass ahead of me. They took two quick looks around and then pulled me down into the tall grass.
“Shh, we’ll explain, we will. Just don’t make a sound.” I heard a woman's voice say.
“You’re not alive, you’re still in the cafeteria, but within this dream is practically another life. Neither of us know how to get back there yet. At dawn we suddenly wake from dusk in a new dream. What room number are you?” A man's voice explained.
It was a lot to process. It felt too lucid for even lucid dreaming. I had a working youthful body and senses that worked. I had begun to feel like I had made a good choice staying behind. Although there was something glaringly obvious that threatened to change that.
I’m 103C. Why are we hiding and whispering? I asked.
“Okay good, remember this is important, 405G and 34D. Repeat it.”
405G and 34D, I got it. Now why are we doing this?
I was met with the answer to my question. At first, silence, but silence eroded rapidly by the sound of heavy steps. They were approaching from where the forest burned, then stopped for a moment before entering the grass. The rustling was moving in this direction. There was another noise too, subtle and quick. The sound of a sharp blade cutting through grass. My heart beat faster and faster. The sensation of fear froze me solid and then I felt the brush of air and a heavy plated foot stomped the ground next to my face.
There was a cry of pain, belonging to the male voice. I heard the plates shift as the figure turned in that direction, then pulled the man up. The struggle was fierce, but pointless. I heard it all the way from here in the grass to deep in the burning forest as he was carried back.
“Damn it. At least it's almost dawn. They won’t have much time, I hope they choke on him.” The woman said.
What was that?
“A hunter. Each dream has a version that tracks us. Many eat us too, we cannot die but we can be digested, you’ll know how that feels soon. How it feels to beg and pray for dawn.”
A familiar scream cut through the stillness, sounds I’d never heard a human make. I shivered in tune to the sound of agony. Then I heard more footsteps approaching. The light was deaf that night.
There was something less creepy about radiology by the simple virtue of it not having to do with severed limbs. As I reached the junction I turned left into the new corridor, noticing it was bare but completed with its beige walls and polished floor. The jigsaw's distant whine was the only noise I heard besides my own steps, but then it stopped abruptly. Casting a look back I found no pursuer. A resolution had been made.
Ahead was a new doorway and a much brighter room this time. I slowed my pace. There was no need to rush in. Creeping up I stood behind the frame and peeked inside, there was movement on the roof, some device darting about on a sort of rail system. Right ahead was a wall about half my height and steps leading down to the main floor. Just beyond the stairs I could clearly make out a couple examining tables on either side of the room, but it was the floor that caught my attention, it made the tables look like islands in some surreal patchwork ocean. Lighter and darker tones were in constant motion, rising and falling, until the machine got above them, then they would settle.
Despite the alien nature of the scene before me, I didn’t feel immediate danger so I made my way into the room. The first thing I became aware of was a low drone from the movement and the rapid sound of clicks when the machine stopped. On my right side I noticed a large window a story higher with the shoulders of a headless doctor just visible. Their movements were small but I guessed they were operating the mechanism on the roof.
There was a rough edge mirrored on both sides of the room, near the sets of stairs the mat didn’t spread to. I looked above and saw that it was pretty similar to the rectangular shape the rails made. I took a quick look to my sides and noticed on my left was a light green outfit hanging on a hook. Not overalls but a single piece of clothing. I went and picked it up and was surprised at the weight, at least a few kilograms, possibly more.
Having finished exploring and taking in the room I held the heavy clothing in front of me protectively. I didn’t want to get any closer to whatever was on the floor, but no other options were left to me. I wondered for a moment if the prosthetics department was worse than this, but it didn’t matter now.
There was a growing suspicion of what was lying before me, and as I took a few steps down I was still more disturbed than I expected. I saw the forming shapes contrasting against the other nearby shades, faces, fingers, even the beginning of limbs. They were puddles that yearned to be people. I watched the closest one, a light brown tan, fingers poked out, then a hand to wrist and even forearm reaching out and up. Then I heard the click, and watched fingers first, then hand and wrist melt away back into the formless puddle.
I didn’t know what to do so I sat on the steps and just watched the flame come to the moths. There was a part of me that wanted to reach out and help, but I feared it would pull me in instead, like a drowning man who kills their would be savior. It felt selfish to admit but, I didn’t want to risk experiencing whatever kind of torture this looked to be.
After a bit of time I noticed a pattern, whichever puddle formed the most gained priority, and the machine would target them. It stood to reason that would include me, which meant I had a short time to get across. I looked at the lead clothing I had picked up. It was possible it would shield me from the xray, but it might shield something else first.
Two plans formed as I looked out, I could shield myself with the lead clothing and carefully try to walk on top of the puddles until I made it through to the end. Or shield one of the puddles in the corner and draw the xray to them by pulling the clothing away, then get onto one of the tables and try to jump to the other side. It was difficult, the deciding factor was how much the puddles would prove to be an obstacle. I would step over their bodies for the chance to survive, so I wondered, what would they do?
[[Try Run Across ]]
[[Bait The X-ray]] As I turn right and pass the corner, I know the prosthetics are going to be creepy. At the same time I don’t want to know what radiation does, not here. The corridor is bright, the brightest yet. There are two long lights with occasional square shaped ones between them running down the whole length of the ceiling, they reflect off what looks to be a recently polished floor. Despite the clean look it's not perfect, I can still make out slight black markings where a set of wheels have rolled up and down the floor.
The sound of the jigsaw catches up to me. It fires up quickly then fades almost as fast, but as it does I hear the footsteps and squeaky wheels taking their place. Looking back I see the headless doctor trying to take the corner too quickly. A leg and two hands fly off the trolley, and to my surprise the doctor stops and begins to pick up the fallen limbs.
I turn my head and find myself on the floor. No pain, but I notice the doors right ahead of me. The hallway had shortened. I hear the squeaky wheels and jump to my feet. I shake the handles but the doors refuse to open. I look back and see the doctor pushing their trolley my way, behind them the patient from before appears and looks this way, then runs towards Radiology. I would have done the same.
“A donation is required to enter, it doesn’t have to cost you an arm or a leg.” The doctor said while holding up a severed hand and foot.
Foot. The word slips out of my mouth, the trolley full of limbs did make me question whether they were all taken by force or if most others volunteered. Maybe only those who gave a full limb got strapped to the gurney.
I walked over and rested my left ankle on the trolley, and the doctor slowly moved an arm behind him. I heard my foot fall against the metal before I registered his slash. I heard the doors behind me swing open and the doctor began pushing the trolley forward forcing me to hop back.
“Aren’t you fortunate, we were running low on prosthetics but you will have many to choose from.” The doctor noted cheerily.
I hopped quickly into the room and began scanning the surrounding, a conveyor belt leading to an intake marked deposits on my right. Two patients wrestling with saws in their hands in the middle of the room, one without a hand and the other without a foot. Around them there are only two prosthetics, a full leg hopping around and a hand running on all fingers. The hand leaps at one of the patients, it flips in the air and lands on their wrist before the mechanism clamps down.
Both patients launch into the air where I now see dozens of patients strung up by one or more limbs. There’s a glint of metallic wires that seem to connect them to something unseen above. The patient missing a foot drops hard but gets up and begins fighting for the hanging patient's leg, swinging wildly with the saw they get a clean hit and slice half a leg off.
The trolley bumps into me in the doorway, I shake it twice, managing to rock it over onto its side before hopping inside the room. I hear a non-existent tongue click behind me, but it's the screaming hanging patient that gets my attention. They look to be trying to cut their own arm just under the prosthetic, but drop the saw in their panic. The other patient finishes sawing the leg they dismembered, they too drop their saw and pick up the foot and after placing it on their own stump, it connects to their own leg and they take off towards the exit.
I hop forward and pick up the closest saw. Then the belt turns on behind me as I see the doctor begin to place limbs down first and then start grabbing at hands and feet. Looking around, there’s only one easily reachable foot, all the other patients either have theirs replaced or are hanging too high up. They’re all rising up into the darkness above slowly.
“Wait please listen, if you pass me a saw I’ll help you. We can work together. I’ll even give you my foot. Just please let me down first.” The patient pleads.
Just then around the conveyor belt I see a new prosthetic arm and leg enter the room from that side. It becomes clear that once fed into the machine, those feet will start hunting my own leg soon. From behind I hear a new arrival, their footsteps are echoing as they run down the corridor this way.
My mind races, I wonder if I can take one of those other feet before they get turned into prosthetics. The person hanging has a foot nearby and it seems the least risky, I could even pretend to help to get a good swipe in. Or I could help free them, and maybe work together against the new patient. Looking up at the hanging patient, their desperate shaking as they are slowly raised, it seems a little late for hope.
[[Try To Help Them]]
[[Take The Foot]] Resting the middle of the lead clothing on my head I tuck my arms in and rest them just above my forehead. There’s a good gap between elbows and wrists to see through, so I stand at the edge and begin to think it over.
It would be best to avoid fingers and arms. Why raise the risk of getting grasped? No running either, a single slip and it's over. I step back, I practice hopping, aiming for a soft landing and explosive launch. Just in case a puddle gets too attached. Having the lead clothes is a surprising help to balance, there’s a sort of confidence growing as I look over the morphing skin field.
There’s a lot of hands and fingers so I wait, wanting to see at least one eligible spot to hop per two by two patch. Every now and then I see a possible chance to go, but it's never perfect. Maybe it never will be. It is a discouraging thought, but I don’t want to find out why there never seems to be anyone else waiting in a room.
Then I see, in a rough three patch row ahead, there are legs, bodies and even a couple faces. 3…2…1…
I hop as far as I can and land on the top half of a leg, My left foot sinks and as it does I feel the flesh wrapping around my toes. The droning movement is closing in on my position, but I trust in the lead clothing. So I bend my knee slightly and push off as hard as I can, my foot slips slightly and much of the force is absorbed by the mass, I make it only half a metre.
As the next foot touches down I feel the weight of something on my raised foot, I realise the first puddle never let go, a hand is starting to clasp its fingers with my toes and is pulling itself up towards me. I don’t even get to look at the other foot that’s now sunk up to my ankle. The one moment of delay now traps me. It's not over yet, I yank my left foot, then I kick and kick. The puddle and I are locked in a stalemate, while another has climbed my right leg up to the knee.
I hear clicks above, but it doesn’t go for me, the hand that held my foot melts away along with its pull. I fall forward into a kneeling position and sink into the human mud. Above me I see the xray chamber point down.
I feel each click, but only hear it once. It's like the sun is hammered into my face and shoulders, then it hits again and again, dissolving more of my bones each time, always hitting my face and shoulders first. I instantly regret looking up.
The pain and formlessness turn me into conscious lava. On instinct alone my body tries to regain its shape, to reach out and never down, so I feel my fingers pushing through my facial skin. The rigidity of bone becomes a pleasant sensation, compared to the formless burning mass the rest of my body takes, it's as though I reach up to heaven. Then heaven answers with fire.
I decided speed would be the key to passing this trial, I didn’t want to test my weight upon the desperate, instead I would do worse.
It was too far to jump from this side onto a table due to its height, but if I threw the lead clothing down I could make it easily. That just meant I had to make sure to take it back. As for the jump from the table to the other side, I was confident I could make the jump, so it was just a matter of avoiding the xray.
Looking at the patches on both sides, the one on the left was paler and smaller. I liked my chances of pulling back the lead clothing more than the larger tan puddle on the right. The plan was clear in my mind. I rolled the clothing around my arm once and let the rest hang down, then grabbed the wall behind me. If they tried to yank me in or take the clothing they would have to give me one hell of a fight for it.
I waited until the puddle in the opposite corner got zapped, then swung the lead clothing out and covered the pale one. Its arm grew up and I had to keep lifting and shaking the clothing to avoid it from grabbing it. The xray came by, but only culled those close and didn’t waste time on the one I cultivated. I saw a shoulder, a neck, they were slender. How old could this person be?
The xray continued to zip around and I kept waiting for it to hit the opposite corner, it was my signal, my starting gun. I kept jostling the clothing but when I looked down I saw a small figure, a young lady, possibly a girl. They did not try to forcefully grab the clothing, but just cowered under it. From under it they looked up at me, now just a half melted person, their eyes just now forming.
“Th-thank you…” They said weakly.
Were they small enough for me to throw? To carry? Was there any way that we could both escape this together? Then I saw it, the xray finally made it to the opposite corner. I looked down into dark brown eyes, then I pulled the clothing away. Their eyes widened, “No please, please don’t go!”
I turned away and began running to the other side, I wouldn’t waste the seconds that she would pay for. First came her desperate slaps on the concrete behind me, then the droning hum of the xray. I unwrapped the lead clothing from my arm and then prepared to throw it towards the table. She screamed before the click, I threw the clothing and ran across it. There was no second scream, but there was a third, even fourth click.
I leapt up onto the table, it took one bound to cross it, and with the same momentum pushed up and forward over the remaining puddles. My arc wasn’t perfect, too low, I lifted my legs which just gave me the clearance to make it cleanly over to the other side. It was a hard landing, I rolled into the corner, then rushed up the stairs.
There was something in me telling me there was no point in looking back, but I had to see. On the other side there was no ‘she’ and no brown eyes, but there was a pale puddle and the sound of the xray.
No. Not a puddle, puddles do not thank, do not look with hope. She had seen me, but worse I had seen her. Now I was on this side, that was the real difference.
My thoughts turned to what 3840 had told me before I left. It all made sense. Maybe this room was a trap for ‘good’ people. How many of them now lived hellishly, because they were punished for trying to do a good deed? There just so happened to be a single article of lead clothing, quite a coincidence. I could hear what the room wanted to say, “Only demons thrive in hell.” But how could that be? There were no demons here. It asked its question, and I gave it a human answer.
I took the necessary steps forward, then leaned up against the doorframe that led to the next corridor. I had overcome the challenge, it was not worth celebrating. That was all there was to it.
This corridor was very short, I could see there were many cubicles on both sides through large glass windows, they were all in shadow, as if it were closed and all the employees had gone home. There was only a single door that was straight ahead with a plaque that read ‘Chief of Medicine.’
There was only one way forward so I went and pushed down on the handle, it clicked open, and the door swung gently revealing a well lit and clean office. There was a rug and two chairs on this side of a large desk. Various bookshelves and cabinets lined the room, but on the desk was a computer.
Nothing else caught my eye, so I went and sat down in the armchair across from the computer. It had a grey wired mouse and keyboard, when I tried clicking the mouse the screen lit up. A recording began to play, it started in a dark green corridor and two people with one backing away. Then it cut to them walking together towards a room.
Then it clicked, not just some people. That was us. It didn’t show the illusions that had been in that first room. Very few patients were actively participating in trying to lure me, but to see myself so frightened in a mostly empty room was a little embarrassing, 3840 just casually walked on the path to the end and waited for me. I looked insane, edging along, jumping out of the way of nothing, looking down and clutching my head. I wanted to fast forward the video but there was no way to.
Next was the unfinished corridor, seeing the headless doctor come out and rest its foot on the wheelbarrow was a bit unnerving. I suddenly began feeling anxious, not because of what I was shown, but what I knew was coming next. There was nothing else to do here so I kept watching, this time it lingered on the person on the gurney, struggling with the jigsaw to cut themselves free. I saw the doctor run past ignoring them and coming after me.
My mood lightened when I saw they had freed themselves just before the doctor came back, then the feed switched just as their chase began. That was until I saw myself in the Radiology room. It skipped to the moment I abandoned the young lady. I tried to look away, but some force did not allow me to. I could see her clawing at the ground, her legs forming, being so close to whole again. Then it reached her.
I could see the impact of each click. In less than two seconds, her form collapsed. Then I saw myself on the feed turn around and after a moment move on.
What else could I do? I couldn’t take that chance. There was only one shot to make it across.
I don’t know why I expected an answer, the screen finished playing the video and at first went black. Then a single solid white line of text popped up with a couple flashing symbols below.
Can you judge a character before their story ends? Y/N
[[Type In Y ]]
[[Type In N ]] Fine, I’ll help you.
Against my better judgement I jump up and try to pass the saw to the hanging patient, even holding the back of the saw they still fail to grab it. Giving it a final try I feel them get their fingers around it and let it go.
I see a couple prosthetic hands begin to walk around the room but what grabs my attention is a couple feet are being placed onto the conveyor belt. Time is running out. I hear the doors slam close. The outside patient never made it in. I realised then that of course they couldn’t ‘make a donation.’
Hobbling as fast as I can, I was too late to grab the first but get the second foot just before it entered the machine. Not all is lost, I place it against my ankle stump, It doesn’t join.
I stand there in disbelief. I push harder, I begin to grind them together, nothing happens. In anger I throw it across the room and see the doctor chase after it. Then I notice the patient, with their arm missing below the wrist, hopping closer on half a mangled leg. The saw in their one hand becomes my main focus. As the patient closes in I hobble right, and as I circle around them, getting close to the other saw, I feel something attach itself to my ankle.
Being so close I make a dive for it, the saw is just within reach when I feel the pull, the tug, the end of the line.
I hear laughing as I’m dragged along the floor and then hung upside down in the middle of the room. I become acutely aware of the circular hole in the ceiling right above me. My body spins slowly and with each rotation I see the other patient getting closer. With my back turning as they come into range I tuck in my arms and lean forward, raising my body up, I feel the wave of air from the saw swing as it misses my shoulder.
“Hey you can still save me, don’t condemn both of us.” The patient says.
Twisting in the air, I can barely track the saw swinging at me, but I feel the gashes made along my body. Then I see the hand walking behind them, it launches up and catches their wristless arm. Their body knocks into mine as they also get raised up. We scuffle and I manage to grab their single wrist and begin trying to pry away their fingers.
I only need the one leg, I can still make it out of here. Please just give me the saw.
The other patient goes still for a moment, their grip slowly loosening, then they flick their wrist sending the saw down to the ground. By the time I reach for it it's too late.
Why? Is all that I can ask.
“I’m not going up there alone. You’re coming with me.” They say.
I swing and punch and kick, and they just laugh. Then I stop. I need to find a way to get free. As we ascend it gets darker and darker. Looking down I can see a lot of movement, until the chamber begins to close a few metres below me. I try to contort my body upward and then down, I pull down on the patient and try to break my leg out of the prosthetic foot, but it's hooked in tight.
The last of the light disappears below and I wonder if this is it. I notice the hum, first in the prosthetic, then as it grows it surrounds me. It gets louder and louder until it feels like the whole chamber is shaking. The pressure forces my body against the other patient. My arms struggle to move my hands to their throat. I feel my form, their form stretching thinner and thinner.
We’re merging. I can sense their fear and it grows as it reacts to my spite. Even as our bodies stretch to become as thin as fishing lines, it’s not the most intense sensation, I feel our psyches collide like two buses and space doubles instantly. I can sense their awareness as we share the mental space. I start by imagining hands and I reach out and grab what I believe represents them. It's half an orb floating in this empty space, its own arms start to form as it tries to knock mine away.
Something shines for a moment, as I begin to picture a floor and wall, my arm is cut. The pain is visceral, I'm almost stunned as I register sensation for the first time in too long. I see their arms now hold a blurry knife, blood covered. Our minds fill in the blanks and this space is becoming vivid, if not the new real.
War it is. I declare loudly. I feel the weight of a tank on my back, the pipes that lead forward and connect to a flaming barrel, the soft pull of a trigger. Screams follow the flames.
Laugh my friend, let us play for eternity.
Okay, but we have to hurry.
Their hand reaches down as I raise the saw just a little out of reach. I can see they’re trying to keep their other leg away with their knee bent, but when they grab for the saw it lowers. It's still too high, so I inch the saw just a little closer, their fingertips brushing the handle. A close call, but their leg lowers again and now I see my chance.
I jump up, their eyes are locked on the saw, but I lower the arm holding it. Instead the other arm grabs their ankle and drags it down from its ninety degree angle. With the saw already raised I press it to the skin. It only takes one motion for the foot to come with, my new foot.
Wasting no time I place it on my stump and the sensation returns immediately. It morphs into my own, their right foot becoming my left, the toes rearranging themselves like strangers on a busy walkway.
“Y-you fucking…!” I hear the person exclaim in disbelief.
My focus goes straight to the exit. Nothing good can come from lingering. I hear the door slam behind me and realise the other person couldn’t pay the toll. After walking to the exit I give a final look back and see two prosthetic feet racing towards the hanging patient, they’re in a dead heat, but one launches first and attaches to the ankle. I turn around before I see the patient disappear into the ceiling hole.
I go to open the door ahead of me and it opens before I touch the handle, two steps later and it slams shut behind me. Something doesn’t sit right with me, and it's not my new foot, it fits perfectly. My logic tells me I could have at least tried to use one of the disembodied feet from the trolley, maybe even my own. Could it have been that easy? I shake my head, it was too great a risk with too little time.
Taking a few steps inside I leaned back and slid down the left wall. It was a good thing 3840 hadn’t come with me. After seeing his movements in the corridor I didn’t like my chances. It became very clear why partnerships couldn’t survive out here. Two men enter, only one can leave. Up to three theoretically, but with the prosthetics wandering around there were no guarantees.
What does this place have against people working together? Does it need lonely people to function? Or does it simply enjoy forcing us to make cutthroat decisions? I was made to play the part of a hyena against a wounded lion. Were there an option to make it fair, would I have chosen it? I could see it now, 3840 must have answered a lot of questions. I’d never seen beauty in the ambiguous, my own morality had never been framed quite like this, it was better not to see my answer painted so clearly.
I stood, and looking up, I found this new corridor was very short, I could see there were many cubicles on both sides through large glass windows, they were all in shadow, as if it were closed and all the employees had gone home. There was only a single door that was straight ahead with a plaque that read ‘Chief of Medicine.’
There was only one way forward so I went and pushed down on the handle, it clicked open, and the door swung gently revealing a well lit and clean office. There was a rug and two chairs on this side of a large desk. Various bookshelves and cabinets lined the room, but on the desk was a computer.
Nothing else caught my eye, so I went and sat down in the armchair across from the computer. It had a grey wired mouse and keyboard, when I tried clicking the mouse the screen lit up. A recording began to play, it started in a dark green corridor and two people with one backing away. Then it cut to them walking together towards a room.
Then it clicked, not just some people. That was us. It didn’t show the illusions that had been in that first room. Very few patients were actively participating in trying to lure me, but to see myself so frightened in a mostly empty room was a little embarrassing, 3840 just casually walked on the path to the end and waited for me. I looked insane, edging along, jumping out of the way of nothing, looking down and clutching my head. I wanted to fast forward the video but there was no way to.
Next was the unfinished corridor, seeing the headless doctor come out and rest its foot on the wheelbarrow was a bit unnerving. Even more so when I watched the doctor go back for the trolley after seeing me run towards prosthetics. That snap decision making seemed far from mindless. I leaned in and watched the doctor picking up extremities after rounding the corner too quickly. I’d assumed they were puppets, entities native to wherever I was, but I started to suspect they might be human too. At least originally.
After watching myself get cornered and the other patient run down the hall, and my amputation for entry, it finally came to the last room. The angle was from just inside the ceiling hole looking down. I see the scuffle with saws, the prosthetic attach and lift both patients up, then one patient harvest from the other.
Then I entered. Watching one arm offering the saw and the other reaching for their leg, it made me wonder why their hope had to be the key to my survival.
I saw myself leap and I wanted to turn away, but something would not allow me. I pounced on that leg like a starving animal. Then in an instant I held my prize, while above me I could see the other patient flailing in rage, and I just walked away. The patient continued to throw themselves around and swung violently, that was until the prosthetic foot attached itself and lifted them higher.
The patient went limp, only swinging gently now. I couldn’t see their eyes from this angle, but I was sure I had just witnessed hope die.
Why are you showing me this? It wasn’t my fault. If anything it was the doctor, the room, the other patient and even themselves. We all had our role to play in this outcome.
I don’t know why I expected an answer, the screen finished playing the video and at first went black. Then a single solid white line of text popped up with a couple flashing symbols below.
Can you judge a character before their story ends? Y/N
[[Type In Y ]]
[[Type In N ]] I leaned back in the chair and thought for a moment. I had borne witness to eternal damnation. The ending of the stories I’d seen written patient by patient along the corridor’s walls. Perhaps just being here was the process, both hospital and patient working together to sort themselves, to be filed away in whichever eternity they navigated to. Thinking back to the video, it had been cut short to highlight certain moments, which alluded to it already having made some judgments. Did the devil set hell to autopilot?
Without more context I couldn’t be sure of the spirit the question was asked in. It could be philosophical, practical or hypothetical. My hands moved according to my nature. What I had done in the last room would never be undone. It couldn’t be written off or counter weighted, it was a fact.
I was sick of sitting here, agonizing over what the answer was and what consequence would follow. The hospital had purposefully brought me here to show my actions, and I had already made my judgments on them. So yes, a character clearly could be judged before their story ended.
I pressed Y and then hit enter.
999:364:23:59:59
In the middle of the screen a timer began counting down.
Was it the right answer or the wrong answer? I glanced around the room to see if anything else had changed, nothing. I tried typing onto the keyboard but there was no reaction. I couldn’t tell if I was fortunate, missing something or if this was a punishment.
In my confusion I sat there and watched the seconds count down. A thousand years was a long time. A sense of dread came with the realization, staying here for a thousand years. It had to be a punishment, that was unless the other answer led to something horrific. Another thought came, it could be that it's given me that long to find an ending, in which case it is good. The only way I’d be able to know for sure is to meet someone who had been here that long, I didn’t like the odds of that. Even if I met one, how could I tell the difference between them and a liar? My mind spiraled from the implication.
Then I heard a door open loudly. I jumped up from the seat and prepared for whatever was about to happen. I carefully approached the doorway, then peeking through I saw a familiar corridor with 270A approaching from the other end. They looked far but I knew how fast the creature could move. I gave one last hateful look towards the computer and then dashed into the corridor.
The issue of the timer was pushed to the back of my mind as I ran through the doorway. There was no brown trail on the floor this time, at least not between 270A and myself. It didn’t seem to have any urgency, but I wasn’t going to take any chances with it. I passed the many patients' doors and windows without so much of a glance. My focus went purely to finding an exit, after running a good distance I could see a branching corridor on the left side and an adjacent door that was open just a crack. An anomaly.
I was relieved to get to the crossroads much faster than 270A. It was inching forward in the distance and looked a lot more grub-like than I’d noticed before, or like a particularly stubby worm. I had the luxury of time to make a decision for what felt like the first time since I arrived. There was still a compulsion to keep my eye on it, but I forced myself to look around.
To my left was the cafeteria, I could only see an empty table from this viewpoint. I wondered if 3840 would be around to fill me in on what would happen now. It was one of the more reasonable options I could take but not my only one. I turned around and first noticed the hallway behind me was gone, instead only a wall filled the way I had come, but then pulled at the door. It did not match those of the patients, it was made of a darker wood and had no accompanying window.
It took some effort and with a heave the door opened. Poking my head in I saw two rows of three empty beds with machines next to them. There was no other doorway which struck me as odd, but I wondered if that meant I just couldn’t see it. Then I noticed it, the first window I’d seen directly connected to the hospital. It looked like pure black outside, but then I caught sight of a glow that passed by quickly. Something was out there.
3840 had warned me about windows here. That he’d heard a scream when the person broke through. Most importantly, he’d never seen their room here. I was glad he mentioned it, but looking at the glow that passed by made it seem a little less daunting. It being a way out of here held potential, both great and terrible.
Pulling my head back I turned and saw that 270A was really exerting themselves, now that they were getting closer. I’d taken long enough to weigh up my options. Make my way to the cafeteria and hope 3840 is still around or take a chance on this strange new room.
[[Enter The Room On the Right]]
[[Go To The Cafeteria ]]Something about this situation rubbed me the wrong way. First the playback of my time here, highlighting the decisions I made for my own survival, then asking about a ‘character.’ It was like a prosecutor asking leading questions.
I got a feeling it was asking permission to judge me. If not that then it might be asking me to judge myself. I refused. I pushed down the N key then had my finger hover over the enter button, but I felt the need to speak first to whatever was clearly watching me, to whatever was setting trap after trap and had not yet caught me for good.
Whether you’re a demon or a god I don’t care, I don’t want a part of this anymore. If you’re trying to show me death is a kindness in the face of eternity, congratulations, I get it now. I’m ready to move on.
I hit the enter key. Sitting back I closed my eyes and waited. Nothing. Nothing happened. I opened my eyes. I was still here, sitting in the office in front of the computer, it wasn’t over yet. I noticed a device had appeared next to the keyboard and the text on the screen had changed too.
Scan hand to gain access.
Access to what was my first thought but I placed my hand on the device. A light scanned from left to right then went dark.
Access granted.
I looked up from the screen and saw there was a new corridor ahead. It was also short, but at the end was a patient's room, the number was 103C. I got up and ran over, I could see my body and my family frozen in the glow of candlelight. I tried the door. Locked. Then I noticed the handscanner next to it. After placing my hand I heard a click and I pushed down on the handle to enter.
For the first time in a very long time I felt peace. An ease of mind. This was where I was supposed to be. Seeing myself on the bed was still a little strange, I had gotten so small, as if I’d had all my insides sucked out except for my bones. Though it was a razor thin silver lining, it had been great to move again in a body with flexibility and strength, and of course, without pain
Then I turned to the family members, how lucky was I to be surrounded by love in these final moments? I relished it, just for a moment longer. My time to move on had long passed. It was time to put myself to rest.
As I stood at my own bedside, I thought about just climbing into my own body. I waved my hand over myself and felt a sort of force like magnetism drawing me in. Before I moved any closer something caught my eye. Next to the open photo album was a polaroid camera. There was that last empty space I could fill.
[[Take The Final Picture]]
[[Climb Into My Body]] It was too mundane, too inconspicuous. There had to be a reason this room appeared now of all times. Perhaps a secret was hiding somewhere among the beds or window. I entered giving one final glance at 270A which stopped rushing over. A good sign, I stepped in and pulled the door closed behind me. This door had a small gap between it and the floor, but I turned my attention to the room.
I walked over to the closest bed. The machine next to it had a blank screen with buttons on the side. The device was sitting on a set of drawers with wheels. I tried to move it. They might as well have been nailed to the ground. I saw the electrode pads on the nicely made bed and tried to connect them to my arm. After they failed to stick I tried other places but no matter where I tried there was no reaction besides sliding off.
Discouraged, I left the heart monitors alone. I tried the drawers on this machine, then a couple others, but they were as good as decorative. Nothing seemed interactable. I was starting to think I should just open the door and run across to the cafeteria. Then I took a closer look at the window, I’d been warned, but even 3840 didn’t really know what to make of it.
It was a peculiar sight. The air shifted more akin to ink in water. There were thicker wisps of the dark substance than in other places, but I could only tell due to a very dull luminescence shining from behind it. I wasn’t mistaken earlier, there was definitely something out there.
I tapped on the window and I heard and felt glass. It reverberated with my tap. A sense of fragility. Tapping again a few times I waited to see if there would be any reaction, but the light oscillated consistently with and without provocation. I wracked my mind trying to think of another way to test the waters or gain further insight on what was out there. Nothing came to mind.
As I stood around I thought I heard a noise come from outside the door and I was glad I closed it. I quietly walked back over and bent to put my hands on the ground before taking a look under the gap. I saw the light of the corridor disappear on the left side of the crack. 270A was out there. Having my main exit sealed was unfortunate, but there was nothing to do about that now.
Very slowly I pushed myself back onto my feet. My options were slim. I really hoped the creature couldn’t open doors, so I explored my options for a place to hide, just in case it came in. There were six, each bed had a space beneath it I could slide myself, but I had a feeling it wouldn’t do me a whole lot of good. Without being able to move the furniture I was also unable to make a barricade. I hadn’t tried the ceiling yet.
I stepped onto a bed and then the heart monitor next to it. I got up and balanced myself, then pushed up on the cork board squares above me. They didn’t budge. I was trapped. Then I caught movement in the corner of my eye.
270A was somehow pushing itself under the gap in the door. It was slow, but steadily its mass was shifting and inflating the portion of itself on this side like a rotten meat balloon. I frantically looked around and searched under the beds, behind the machines and even back out the window. There was nothing new.
I realised now that I was most certainly caught. If I wanted to have even a small chance to get out of this then I needed to make a plan now. I sat on the middle bed next to the window. The room was feeling smaller and smaller as 270A increased in size. There was a chance, no matter how small, that I could bait the creature into coming for me and I could escape out the door. It wouldn’t be easy, but it also wasn’t impossible.
The window was the other obvious choice. If I were to threaten to break it, 270A might back off. If the bluff was called, then I’d have to make a split second decision. If 3840 was afraid, then it could be too, but I felt a growing nervousness about finding out for sure. Maybe a harder tap could scare it off if it called my bluff. Getting eaten by this creature was a temporary sentence, it was easier to face than the greater unknown.
I felt a deep regret for entering here as I watched 270A begin stretching itself further into the room. Again I’d been faced with two bad options, although this time I did have myself to blame. Closing my eyes for a second I tried to calm myself. There was no longer time to think. Threaten or run.
[[Threaten To Break The Window]]
[[Try To Escape]]I stepped back from the door. There was no need to corner myself now, especially when weighed against all the questions I had for 3840. The significance of the countdown being at the top of that list.
As I walked away, it felt like the hospital itself was always trying to tempt me into making bad decisions. For now it was a gentle whisper, but I also feared that the pattern wouldn’t hold. Perhaps one day it would insist. I was comforted by the fact that there were others who were braving the corridors with me. Finding the will to go on alone in this place was already hard, and it would only get harder if I had a thousand years ahead of me.
I picked up my pace as both 270A and I were approaching the corner. Without its trail to slide on it was a bit of a pitiful sight. Its legless body dragging itself around, too much friction to snake its way forward. Something I became grateful for as I came out a distance ahead of it and approached the open doors.
The barebones kitchen was directly ahead of the doors this time. Unexpected, but still a welcome sight. That was until I entered the cafeteria proper. It was awestriking and eerie, the room was massive and filled with patients at tables all in complete stillness. A place time had abandoned, or at least taken a long vacation away from.
Almost all the nearby tables were full, so I took a little run up and jumped up from the side of the nearest one and surveyed the room. Most patients rested their heads in their hands or laid down on their arms, a smaller portion stared down or at the wall ahead, very few froze while standing or lying down. I looked further out to my right and as my vision dragged along I saw a horizon of a hundred tables. No, more than that.
I could see a small square in the far distance, which I presumed to be the exit to the next corridor. I jumped back down to the checkered floor and began the trek over. It seemed unlikely that 3840 would be here and if he was he would have called out. To see so many people catatonic, or maybe despondent was the better word, did have me wonder if it wasn’t just low morale. Maybe there was a good reason so many people decided to stay here.
Halfway towards the door I heard a loud thump from a table far away on my left. The echo passed me and then was chased by a second louder sound. I dropped into a crouch and hid behind a table. I chided myself for getting too relaxed. Maybe this wasn’t a safe zone, maybe it wasn't even a cafeteria at all. 270A hadn’t followed me in, but that could be because there was something even it feared.
The exit was still far away, it would take a while, but if I kept low I could make myself hard to find. I suddenly realised how great a hiding spot under these tables was. Just as I was about to wiggle myself under one, I heard a voice shouting.
“I did it. I did it! I’m free! Hahahaha.”
I peeked over someone's shoulder and saw another patient standing on a table fist pumping. It was the first time I’d seen a patient so animated, so happy. When they began to dance, I made up my mind and decided that this was most likely a real person and finally stood up myself.
They seemed too ecstatic to notice my approach, after a minute or so of walking I got up to the table where the celebration was still going strong. Their eyes were shut and they were humming a song along with throwing their arms about.
Now that I’d arrived, I didn’t really know what to say. After a moment the words slipped out
Hey ther-.
They screamed and reacted instantly. The height and distance they made with that single jump was impressive. The landing, however, was not. They launched into the space between two sitting patients with one leg sticking out over the bench and another under the table, all while their body folded forward.
I quickly came to their aid and grabbing one of their arms helped pull them up. Their eyes were wide and stared at me. Our bodies weren’t capable of shock, but that expression possessed more than fear and surprise.
“What. Why! What?” Surprise, anger and then finally confusion.
Hi. I’m 103C. I’m new around here and just wanted to ask a few questions. That's all.
As the patient was pulled to their feet their eyes took a more natural look and they grabbed my shoulders, “I’m free! At last I am free!”
Free from what?
“The dream. A dream of flesh and blood and mortality. Of paws and jaws and maws. I’m free but not them. You see them sit, yes, but they are buffet tables. They sit not to eat, but to be eaten. Eaten forever” He laughed and spun away in another direction.
I tried to ask more questions, but he just laughed and spun. Fell over and then continued. So I stopped following them and pushed on towards the room's exit. I didn’t like the sound of becoming food even if it was a dream. What I did question was why there were so many people sitting if that was the case. Were these people tricked, or was that ‘dream’ preferable to what awaited me outside?
After a fair amount of walking I made it to the doors. I could still hear laughing at times, the occasional crash soon to follow. Finally standing there I could see a rather daunting looking hallway, similar to the first one I’d arrived in. It was quite narrow and had a green tinge. There was also an open seat at the closest table, just a couple steps away. If it could be escaped, then the dream was temporary, even if potentially terrible. Neither choice excited me, but a choice still had to be made.
[[Go And Sit Down]]
[[Wander The Corridors ]]I moved myself onto the furthest bed from the door and waited. Its size forced the creature to spill between the first two beds. Its back end blocked the door from opening. I was tense, poised to jump over to the other side of the room at any moment. It also began to wait.
I crept forward slowly moving in and out of the range I believed it could snatch me in. It made a few gurgling sounds then the split of its front opened. I expected teeth or some alien throat dripping with acid, but no, there was just a damp pinkish space and a dead end. Each of 270A’s tentacles retracted and slipped into slits within the walls of its ‘mouth.’
Moving back I sat on the bed. It had made its position clear, even boldly announcing it. Checkmate.
If it continued to sit at the door, then my only reasonable exit was cut off. That only left the window now, but I refused to consider it an option. I had a bad feeling about that eternity. It was like a dare from a bad friend. Crossing a line I had the good sense to know I shouldn’t. So it left me here. A cage with only one horrific opening, it welcomed me to leave anytime.
The furniture would not move, the ceiling would not open. I struck at the walls. Fist over fist I struck the wall like a prisoner with a plastic spoon. I was also going nowhere. The gurgles that followed I was sure mocked my efforts. 270A just waited.
I propped myself up against the corner and stared into the open maw. If there was no other way and it refused to be baited further into the room, then I could turn this into a game of patience. Since it was willing to give me this time, perhaps with enough thought I would find a way to escape. We might both have a thousand years on the clock so there was no rush.
There were moments I was glad to have something to put my mind towards, others where it felt I hated the creature. It hadn’t moved or made a single noise. The standoff was maddening. The few ways to escape I’d tried led nowhere. The only way out was the door.
So I waited. I tried to find a way to mark the time but the room was immutable. I couldn’t allow the distraction of creating some mental record either. Instead I would talk aloud at times. Mostly to keep myself sharp. I would mention events when I guessed they’d happened, like my birthday and even once the possible anniversary of us becoming cellmates. It never moved. Now it had been a while since I last spoke. I had no idea how much time had really passed, but I couldn’t just wait it out anymore.
The time had come to test the waters. I had to know if 270A was actively watching me or if it had fallen into a trance. Gradually I moved over to the adjacent bed. Then I moved a bit closer every time I felt I could take an inch without it noticing. This wasn’t exhausting in a physical sense, but the weight of hope continued to build. I was getting closer and closer and the creature was motionless.
I had been a glacier, no longer, my slowly won opportunity had finally arrived. I was on the bed closest to the door. Only a metre or so from the fleshy open mouth. Even if it was motionless all this time I had to stay on my guard. I had earned this moment through caution, but I was about to take my shot.
I’d run simulations over and over in my head. With its back extending under the door I would have to avoid stepping on it. I would lean over and catch myself by my pinky and the side of my palm in the doorframe. Rip open the door while I balance, then jump from my right foot to slip through the angle.
Now it was down to the execution, anything longer than a second would be a failure. A chance to get snapped up. I braced myself mentally and began to prepare my muscles to launch.
In a single smooth motion I flung over and caught myself and grabbed the handle. Perfect. I pushed the door and it found resistance. I was over my allotment, failure, but I couldn’t stop here. I pushed so hard that I lost my balance, my feet plunging onto the creature. The sensation was unpleasant, like standing on cold mincemeat. I pushed desperately once more but then I saw it, the detail that threatened to shatter my mind.
The flesh stretched slightly. I saw it stretch. It was always blocked. Always sealed. The hope was my fiction, my fantasy. All the plans just a sick daydream. The real guard this whole time was the lump of body jamming the door. 270A never reacted. It had long been checked out. We weren’t trapped here together, it was just me and my foolish hope of leaving.
I rejected the idea at first. I pulled at the tail end of 270A. Tried to dislodge it. Failing that, I kept trying the door. I even tried to break the door down with my shoulder, causing me to slip and fall flat into the cold meaty body below.
Acceptance was a long road. I laid on the ground for a considerable, yet still unmeasurable time. A blip in comparison to the length of my overall escape attempt. I got up and walked in front of the pink fleshy mouth I had avoided for so long. It was the only door out and I felt an immense relief replace the fear. It was a different prison, a different sentence, but now a welcome change. How long I served for would now be in my hands. I was ready to take my first step towards freedom.
It was cold and mushy on the soles. I hunched to fit inside better, and when it did not close, I pulled the flaps of its mouth shut myself. The waters of change came and melted my body, my essence added to a boiling soup then bubbling out and expanding until I felt the raw damp blob I had become. I embraced its sickly gray flesh.
There was no face to smile but I was ready. I felt a foreign body forming in my frontal slit and a patient was ejected. It wasn't just any patient. It was my former captor, the jailor who had guarded the door, held me in their silent vigil. They scurried back into the corner of the room.
The strangeness of this body distracted me for a moment, this vision without eyesight. I knew the corridor outside, I could sense the walls, just like the ones of this room. Like I had connected to a network, seeing without seeing. Moving was alien. In fact it was the biological equivalent of using a keyboard for the first time if the keys were unlabeled. It was fine. I would learn.
Seeing the patient looking back at me I wondered if they hadn’t thought this through. Not all that much had changed. The door was still sealed. We were both still inside this room. What made me gurgle in joy was knowing that now our roles had reversed, but I would not open my mouth. It would not be so easy for them.
There had to be a good reason so many were here. Gathering more information in a temporary existence beat blindly chancing a permanent one. That being said, I needed to find out how the other patient got free. It at least couldn’t hurt to try to ask before making such a big decision.
He had stopped spinning now and was running past tables and slapping the back of other patients' heads. After getting close I tried running beside and calling after the madman, but he ignored my calls. So instead I tried to anticipate his movements. I was wrong several times and had to reposition, until on the fifth try he finally headed towards me.
It was obvious he had every intention to run right through me, he didn’t acknowledge my presence in any way. I bent my knees and leant forward. I would catch him. When he was two steps away I leapt forward, grabbed behind his knees, lifted him up, then slammed him to the ground.
For a moment his legs kicked and I thought he was trying to push me off, it then became clear he was still trying to run while flat on his back. A couple seconds later he seemed to wake up and then craned his neck to look at me.
“You again. What do you want now?”
As he fell still I released him and stood before offering a hand.
I just had a question, I’m about to enter the dream you just woke from, but before I do I wanted to ask how you got free and why only you.
He grabbed my hand and got to his feet, his eyes took on a dark and serious look. Then he began pointing to different patients,
“That one's a chicken, this one a cow and that one a pig. They feared the pain and learned to numb the mind.”
He lifted a finger and began to push it behind his left eye up to the last knuckle. Leaning forward to show it better as his eye was bulging to the side, he pulled it back out.
“You cannot. You will be food until you learn to not be food. They are livestock, their value is in being eaten.” Looking down in disdain he slapped the back of the closest head.
Then he grabbed my head suddenly with his thumbs pushing into my cheekbones, “You must be a man, with a value to distinguish you from meat. While they run and hide you must befriend and work until you earn a place in their societies. That is why I am here, and they are there.”
He’d shaken my head with each sentence, but now he released me and looked lost for a moment before his gaze lowered, “I had friends, families even. My deaths washed away at dawn, their lives washed by time. There are some blessings to being immortal, burying each person you dare to love is not one of them. It was time for the dream to end.”
Then he looked up with a large smile and took off running, extending both arms to slap heads on both sides as he went, “Eeeeeeeternity won’t you maaaaaaaaarry meeeeeeee.”
I watched as with one final laugh, he made a turn and ran straight out into the corridor. After he was gone I snapped back into myself and tried to assess the information. If he weren’t lying or crazy, which I did have some doubts on, then escaping the dream had to do with how you related to the dream residents. That and the rest I would have to piece together once I got in there.
I’d stalled enough. The information felt valuable, but there was nothing I could do with it here. At the closest table there was one seat available in the middle so I went and sat and tried to mentally prepare myself.
After a long time I started to wonder what I was doing wrong. I was still here in the cafeteria. I put my head down on my arms like many of the others, and began to think about what I should do when I arrive. Thought after thought came until I lost track of myself and I realised I heard the sound of birds chirping.
I breathed in and smelt the indistinct sweet scent of nature. Sitting up I saw I had been leaning on a small boulder and the trunks of several large trees around me. I’d never seen so many stars and I could just see the edges on the few sparse clouds turning pink. On my right was a sloped dirt trail that winded down towards a structure that may have been ten to twenty kilometres away. It was circular and possibly white, layered upwards like the top half of a beehive. There was only one torchlit entrance I could see and it was open.
There was movement, shuffling from my left, off the path. I crouched behind the small boulder and listened.
“-choose one already.” I could just make out from a nearby whisper.
“The curves got to be right, I already told you why. Here like this one.” An annoyed voice replied.
I looked over the boulder and saw two naked men, one a head taller than the other. They both had muddy feet and seemed to be on high alert, in an instant they went still. One slowly began to look around. I wondered if they really were more like animals now and stood up.
Hey, you’re both patients from the hospital right?
The two relaxed immediately. After staring at me looking confused they turned to each other.
“Another one came to the table. You don’t recognise them do you?” The tall one asked.
“Nah gotta be a fresh catch. Spose we’re stuck with the baby tonight.” The shorter one shook their head.
They motioned me to come over and the tall guy snapped a curved twig from a tree, tried to bend it and touched the sharper end. He seemed satisfied with the result and turned around.
“Him, then you and then you need to do mine. Don’t forget to account for the curve and do it short. The motion is just like unlocking a door. Now watch carefully.” The taller one said before walking over to me.
“Listen, we’re taking care of you tonight. You’ll be in good hands. Just trust us and it will all be okay. We’ll explain as we go.”
He put his left hand on top of my head and pulled my top left eyelid back. After he told me to look up I did, which was immediately followed by a sharp pain and a popping sensation behind my eye. A second later I realised whatever happened was already over and I didn’t really mind. There was a dull throb I could feel, but even if it was like a pain, it didn’t matter.
“See that, no damage to the eye. Very quick. No violent wiggles, just a single twist after a bit of practice.”
“Whatever, do mine already.” The shorter man replied.
I watched them both take turns pushing a stick behind each other's eye and twisting it. They gained a sort of dumb smile afterwards. I felt my own face and I was surprised I had one too. My mind was sort of floaty, like a happy mist.
We were suddenly wandering the woods as it was getting darker. After finding some sturdy sticks, we began digging a shallow hole which they got me to lay in, put a hollow stick in my mouth, then buried me. It was only then that I noticed how much I didn't really care.
Time passed quite peacefully until I felt my foot get kicked. Dragged out of the hole by my ankle I was surrounded by laughter.
“Found ourselves a meat potato. Should we eat them now or later? Got plenty to bring back already.”
I wiped the dirt from my face and looked around. Four man-like creatures were standing over me. Their skin was gray and had two slits instead of a protruding nose, giving a more skullish look to their heads.
The four seemed in disagreement. One pulled me to my feet, raised my arm, then brought a cleaver down on my collarbone. They wrenched the blade out and began hacking with poor accuracy. I watched and began to laugh at the terrible job they were doing, which prompted the other members to look over
“First time?” The words slipped out reflexively.
The side of the cleaver slapped the side of my face but I heard the others start critiquing the creature's method. After my arm was separated I was thrown into a cage on wheels where other men and women sat. A burning sensation spread across my arm where it no longer sat. I looked out and saw my severed arm on a rock next to a campfire.
I was getting dizzy, weaker. I saw the blood continuing to shoot out of my shoulder. I lost most awareness besides sensation. The near simultaneous piercing sensations led me to believe I was consumed by more than three creatures.
Suddenly it was cold and I was staring down at the snow. The memories of the night before hit me like a rubber band stretched back a mile away. I felt like I woke from a lucid nightmare but it did not fade and I didn’t have to try to recall it. It was just there. Vividly.
I shivered and sat in the snow. The trade off was clear, I could live in the daze of a nightmare, unable to think properly but also unable to process the pain. Or, I could live fully, feel fully and try to build a life in this new dream world.
It wasn’t a choice. It was a golden opportunity. Skills, knowledge and competence, these were the weapons of mankind. I would be my own inheritor, my own ancestor, a new type of monster in a world that only saw livestock. I would learn to master the dream.
I understood the hospital better now. Even the ‘safe zone’ with the most people I’d seen gathered, was itself just its own trap. At least that was how I interpreted it for now. It was possible many people chose it over wandering the corridors because the other rooms never let go. They could awake from a dream, but there was no waking from eternity. Dreaming was an option I could explore if in my thousand years I fell into great boredom.
Staring into the corridor I only felt dread. I didn’t have even a drop of curiosity, not that it would be enough to fuel my motivation, no amount could get me over the hump of my own trepidation. It was simply a necessity.
As much as I wished for an alternative, becoming psychic livestock somehow held even less appeal. Stepping out I heard the laughing cut off immediately and I knew the cafeteria was gone. The quiet was a welcome change. At first, that is. I checked behind me only to see the corridor extended out in both directions now. To be so on edge with only your own footsteps to keep you company is a curse. To name that curse in no uncertain terms, paranoia.
I walked forward and took turn after turn, listening carefully, waiting for the moment something changed. Yet it stretched on, countless steps closer to something I could only imagine. Now I began to think this was the real hospital, and I was now firmly caught in its web, it had no reason to rush to get me.
The relief I felt approaching a four-way intersection faded in moments. There was a different sort of mounting weight pressed upon sanity, when I looked down four connecting corridors and saw the exact same indistinct endlessness. I could have closed my eyes and spun around and lost track of where I’d come from, but what was worse was thinking that even if I did backtrack, it may not matter in the slightest.
So I kept walking forward without turning. At times I thought I heard a second set of steps, other times I thought there was a sound besides my echo. I began to feel the constant need to look over my shoulder. Stopping periodically trying to catch out whatever might be tailing me. This was bad, but could not compare to the moment when it worked.
It was just one step out of sync.
I turned and saw the same endless empty corridor, but I knew it now. I wasn’t insane and I wasn’t alone. Walking again I pretended I didn’t hear it. The ruse had to be maintained. It might strike if it realised I knew it was there. My walking speed would quicken and I would slow again, then I would stop and test it like before, only to soon catch myself walking too quickly. I might have been able to maintain the act better, only now I caught it every time.
The only strand of reason that kept me from tearing off in absolute hysteria or trying to desperately confront the noise was that it never sounded closer.
What was worse than an end was no end. I realised my fear now was the same I’d clung to when I was dying. I could no longer do it. This torture of fleeing the unknown was too great a burden. I snapped.
I lay down in the middle of the corridor and laughed. How far I had walked in absolute terror, only to get nowhere, only to finally give in.
I’m done now. Come get me. You win.
I closed my eyes and heard footsteps approaching.
There was a sudden light I could see behind my eyelids. I was ready, whatever came next I was ready. I opened my eyes slowly, as they adjusted I saw the square-shaped fluorescent lights above me. A variation of the ceiling I’d seen before. I sat up and I was in a new corridor.
It wasn’t over.I realised I had made some bold assumptions as I looked at the eyeless body of 270A, but I would still test it. I pulled my punch as I hit the window and it made a small thump. The creature paused for a moment.
That’s right, you should stop. Now back away.
270A instead wriggled forward with its tongues slipping out and hanging in the air. It was approaching fast and I had only one strong move to play. I hit it harder, and despite trying to make a louder warning, instead I heard the sound of a crack.
With the force of my desperate fist the illusion of glass gave way to a membrane. In a split second a wetness spread upward along my forearm and tightened. The room itself stretched before I was taken in by the vacuum and ejected.
I found myself floating towards a pillar of white light. Streaks of distinct white were launching towards the inky darkness that covered a labyrinthine structure, it looked like I was inside a squared version of a tangled ball of black yarn with an altered plasma globe inside. One white streak struck me like lightning, and I felt the texture of thought, a memory that wasn’t mine of a festival with bright colors and painted faces. The energy left through my legs and I looked behind me to see it strike a rod outside the window I’d left. It illuminated the dark and I saw the outline of the window.
Turning back to the light, I thought of a white hot knitting needle that had pierced through the yarn ball. There was no end above or below. I continued to float closer and began to see a texture comprising the bright pillar. It reminded me of a carcass I’d been by the side of the road once when I was young, white maggots crawling over and under each other, white on white, the movement more distinct than the individual forms.
Then I heard it, a gentle dissonance. I had thought it as silent as pitch black is dark but then I continued closer. The voices had all been too loud to hear any number over the total mass of screaming. As the momentum drew me closer I clawed around me quickly to find nothing but air. The gentle dissonance turned into a screaming equivalent of static.
In my panic I began spinning. I could no longer maintain any orientation turned to black with a flashing white. It became clear, I was a sky diver with no parachute. A gravity bound reunion was inevitable. Fate had already been written, yet I’d never been so tortured by the ink drying.
I shut my eyes.
The light continued to flash behind my eyelids so I covered them with my hands and curled up. I wondered if I would make a splash. Then I lost the sound of my own mind as the static became chaos as sung through human vocals. Each of my rotations was now the beat by which my collision counted down.
Impact stirred me from my stasis. I lost all connection to my body and I became a visual awareness alone. I saw a corridor and felt the intention to brighten it, and did so before me. Each question I had was sucked out of my mind before it properly formed. Instead a will impressed upon me specifications, colors and details.
Even the realisation I was having at that moment slipped away before I could process it. So I tried to rebel, darkening the corridor with the intent to make it lightless. I was rewarded by the feeling of a tear ripping into my soul. A warning shot. Then I realised why I’d heard so many screams. I lightened the corridor again. Added fidelity and new details, a doorway here, shadows there. The spiritual equivalent of a suture began to put me back together.
Whatever was sending me its intent dragged my awareness to the end of a hallway. There ahead was a large empty space. Above the door an empty label that I could feel it wanted me to fill. I noticed as I thought through different hospital rooms and wards that it didn’t steal these thoughts away, it wanted me to plan. It even permitted me to think my new realisation aloud. I had been turned into software.
It was turning us all into the architects of nightmares.
I moved myself onto the furthest bed from the door and waited. Its size forced the creature to spill between the first two beds. Its back end blocked the door from opening. I was tense, poised to jump over to the other side of the room at any moment. It also began to wait.
I crept forward slowly moving in and out of the range I believed it could snatch me in. It made a few gurgling sounds then the split of its front opened. I expected teeth or some alien throat dripping with acid, but no, there was just a damp pinkish space and a dead end. Each of 270A’s tentacles retracted and slipped into slits within the walls of its ‘mouth.’
Moving back I sat on the bed. It had made its position clear, even boldly announcing it. Checkmate.
If it continued to sit at the door, then my only reasonable exit was cut off. That only left the window now, but I refused to consider it an option. I had a bad feeling about that eternity. It was like a dare from a bad friend. Crossing a line I had the good sense to know I shouldn’t. So it left me here. A cage with only one horrific opening, it welcomed me to leave anytime.
The furniture would not move, the ceiling would not open. I struck at the walls. Fist over fist I struck the wall like a prisoner with a plastic spoon. I was also going nowhere. The gurgles that followed I was sure mocked my efforts. 270A just waited.
I propped myself up against the corner and stared into the open maw. If there was no other way and it refused to be baited further into the room, then I could turn this into a game of patience. Since it was willing to give me this time, perhaps with enough thought I would find a way to escape. We might both have a thousand years on the clock so there was no rush.
There were moments I was glad to have something to put my mind towards, others where it felt I hated the creature. It hadn’t moved or made a single noise. The standoff was maddening. The few ways to escape I’d tried led nowhere. The only way out was the door.
So I waited. I tried to find a way to mark the time but the room was immutable. I couldn’t allow the distraction of creating some mental record either. Instead I would talk aloud at times. Mostly to keep myself sharp. I would mention events when I guessed they’d happened, like my birthday and even once the possible anniversary of us becoming cellmates. It never moved. Now it had been a while since I last spoke. I had no idea how much time had really passed, but I couldn’t just wait it out anymore.
The time had come to test the waters. I had to know if 270A was actively watching me or if it had fallen into a trance. Gradually I moved over to the adjacent bed. Then I moved a bit closer every time I felt I could take an inch without it noticing. This wasn’t exhausting in a physical sense, but the weight of hope continued to build. I was getting closer and closer and the creature was motionless.
I had been a glacier, no longer, my slowly won opportunity had finally arrived. I was on the bed closest to the door. Only a metre or so from the fleshy open mouth. Even if it was motionless all this time I had to stay on my guard. I had earned this moment through caution, but I was about to take my shot.
I’d run simulations over and over in my head. With its back extending under the door I would have to avoid stepping on it. I would lean over and catch myself by my pinky and the side of my palm in the doorframe. Rip open the door while I balance, then jump from my right foot to slip through the angle.
Now it was down to the execution, anything longer than a second would be a failure. A chance to get snapped up. I braced myself mentally and began to prepare my muscles to launch.
In a single smooth motion I flung over and caught myself and grabbed the handle. Perfect. I pushed the door and it found resistance. I was over my allotment, failure, but I couldn’t stop here. I pushed so hard that I lost my balance, my feet plunging onto the creature. The sensation was unpleasant, like standing on cold mincemeat. I pushed desperately once more but then I saw it, the detail that threatened to shatter my mind.
The flesh stretched slightly. I saw it stretch. It was always blocked. Always sealed. The hope was my fiction, my fantasy. All the plans just a sick daydream. The real guard this whole time was the lump of body jamming the door. 270A never reacted. It had long been checked out. We weren’t trapped here together, it was just me and my foolish hope of leaving.
I rejected the idea at first. I pulled at the tail end of 270A. Tried to dislodge it. Failing that, I kept trying the door. I even tried to break the door down with my shoulder, causing me to slip and fall flat into the cold meaty body below.
Acceptance was a long road. I laid on the ground for a considerable, yet still unmeasurable time. A blip in comparison to the length of my overall escape attempt. I got up and walked in front of the pink fleshy mouth I had avoided for so long. It was the only door out and I felt an immense relief replace the fear. It was a different prison, a different sentence, but now a welcome change. How long I served for would now be in my hands. I was ready to take my first step towards freedom.
It was cold and mushy on the soles. I hunched to fit inside better, and when it did not close, I pulled the flaps of its mouth shut myself. The waters of change came and melted my body, my essence added to a boiling soup then bubbling out and expanding until I felt the raw damp blob I had become. I embraced its sickly gray flesh.
There was no face to smile but I was ready. I felt a foreign body forming in my frontal slit and a patient was ejected. It wasn't just any patient. It was my former captor, the jailor who had guarded the door, held me in their silent vigil. They scurried back into the corner of the room.
The strangeness of this body distracted me for a moment, this vision without eyesight. I knew the corridor outside, I could sense the walls, just like the ones of this room. Like I had connected to a network, seeing without seeing. Moving was alien. In fact it was the biological equivalent of using a keyboard for the first time if the keys were unlabeled. It was fine. I would learn.
Seeing the patient looking back at me I wondered if they hadn’t thought this through. Not all that much had changed. The door was still sealed. We were both still inside this room. What made me gurgle in joy was knowing that now our roles had reversed, but I would not open my mouth. It would not be so easy for them.
Left. It was the only thought I needed. The sound of my own steps was drowned out by three sets of paws and the low toned barks of big dogs. Each second was a second they were closer. A second I no longer had to spare. The door was almost within reach when I heard them right behind me. I could not stop slowly. As I passed by it, I threw a hand and caught the doorknob.
The whiplash from the momentum could have wrenched my shoulder from its socket, in another world at least. I caught the briefest flicker of shadows passing by me. The skittering of nailed paws fighting for purchase on a smooth floor. I pulled myself up and turned the handle to my great relief. I pushed the door, entered, and slammed it shut. I sank down against it to keep it closed.
After a second to process the fact that I had survived, I stood up and noticed a button in the doorknob. I felt a slight sense of relief along with the soft click signifying the lock had engaged. Then I remembered they were shadows, so it might be possible for them to slip under the door. They were pouncing up on the door, still barking in different intervals. At least they didn’t seem to realise it for now, if they really could.
Just as I was about to turn away I felt the room rumble and shake. The barking stopped and a sharp whistle came from not far beyond the door. The shudders became a small but constant vibration and I felt the room moving. I opened the door a crack and then more as I saw the room was sliding to the left. A grey wall was already half blocking the door. I wondered if I should try to jump through the gap, but in my hesitation the doorway was sealed.
If I had a normal body, the hairs on the back of my neck would be standing at attention like a guilty soldier during an inspection. I’d experienced this feeling before. When you think you're alone but your body knows better. Only it wasn’t just knowing. I was sure the gravity had doubled since I’d entered. There was a presence in this room and its attention fell like a heavy hand that pushed down upon me.
Slowly and with great effort, I took several uncertain steps to turn myself around. I got an overwhelming sense that this room did not belong here. An orb of fire on the left illuminated the rest of the room. The floor was patterned, not like tile, it was as if a perfectly cut gem had been unfolded. Yet the stones' dark red and black colour rolled like mist in a gentle breeze. The walls were a shiny cobblestone, and where stars formed constellations, the wall had a holographic card effect. Different images of dividing bubbles and fire among others I couldn’t understand, they leapt so violently out from the walls I had to avert my gaze.
The pressure that had grown in my head found instant relief. Then the room instantly grew dimmer and I looked towards the fire. A glassy orb retained its size, but inside I saw a triangle. I took increasingly difficult steps over to get a better look. Its rounded top gave it away immediately. A person sat cross-legged. Their form was a silhouette in the light, then they expanded and so too did the flame. The full cycle played out before me. At the height of the blaze, it began to swirl and was sucked downwards before returning to its lesser state.
To my surprise, I felt fatigue growing, with each step towards the centre of the room the burden lightened, but the weight of being watched was constant. Opposite the door, I noticed something glowing on what looked to be a mix of alien laboratory table and a podium. The glowing object had two handles on either side of a bowl, its shape slimmed down and then widened at the bottom. As I approached, I felt unburdened, even elated. The object had a large star shape and an inscription below it.
“A toast to a rising star.”
I couldn’t understand how I could read it despite the metal trophy looking like it would begin to melt any second now. Inside a black liquid bubbled. It had a sweet smell, but not one I could place. I licked my chapped lips. In fact, I felt a certain thirst had suddenly grown, the back of my throat was uncomfortably dry. Then it hit me. I reached up and felt my face. It was back. My nose and mouth had returned to me.
Then I took a step back. A temptation had been thrust upon me, but I was not so impulsive. If I were to drink, it would be of my own choosing. On the right side of the room, the light had just turned its brightest, and I could just make out an altar with something beneath it. The gravity increased at a much quicker rate. I circled around the middle so I would not block the light. As I staggered, I could see a cushion below what was indeed an altar. To what? I could not tell, but I could see the imprints of two knees where others had knelt.
There was a bias on full display. Something did not want me over here. I wondered if, since a prayer got me into this wretched hospital, it might be possible for a prayer to get me out. A cynical voice whispered in the back of my mind that this was more likely a cruel joke. The more I thought, the less the clues I tried to piece together meant anything. A coin toss for the fate of my soul. To drink of greatness or to kneel before one.
[[Take A Drink From The Chalice]]
[[Kneel Down And Pray]] Forward. Each step was hopeful. A desperate clawing towards an unknown future. The gap in the doors grew brighter. I could hear the dogs on my heels as I passed the protruding doorknob I rejected. A final bark before my ankle shifted. The right side of the leg was nudged to the leftward and it caught the back of the other. My wet form slid and rolled before I felt the grip of teeth wrap around my arm like bony fingers. Then another and another.
I twisted my body until my feet touched the ground. My shadow in a tug of war against two phantom canines. A damp trail was forming on the back of my ankles. I wrenched back twice before I slipped on the ground. The dogs pulled forward as I was falling which folded me forward. My body shifted forward a few inches before I began my desperate scramble.
I leaned back and kicked, but there were no bodies to hit, and I lost further ground. I was being pulled closer to the edge of the light and closer to the sea of darkness ahead. The light that had been shining on me now swung pointing downward and approached. The doorknob I had just passed was getting closer, but I had no arm to reach for it.
Then it began to get brighter. I heard the double doors behind me open, and a new light poured in. The dogs on my arms retreated with whimpers, and the flashlight before me was raised. It stung my eyes, disorienting me, and turned my vision white.
I turned away only to get hit with the same sting but slightly stronger. I pushed my head towards the wall to seek relief from the overwhelming sensations. My right hip hit something as I covered my face.
“This one's mine,” the dog owner called.
“I’m closer,” the other replied.
Quick sets of steps approached me from both sides. Even with my eyes firmly shut, I could feel the light burning and see a growing whiteness. Then it came to me, there was only one thing that stuck out of the corridor's wall, one last sliver of hope to wrap my hand around.
Reaching down, I felt the doorknob, turned it quickly, then all but fell inside. An instant relief of the burning was like ice following a powerful mint. I shuddered involuntarily before the sound of steps roused me enough to remember to slam the door behind me. I held the doorknob to stop it from turning and began to hear pounding on the other side of the door.
As I held it tight, I noticed a button in the doorknob. I felt a slight sense of relief along with the soft click signifying the lock had engaged. Then I remembered they had shadow dogs, so it might be possible for them to slip under the door. If they would come, they would come, but I held the door closed all the same.
Then the room rumbled and shook. The banging outside stopped immediately, this was something else. The shudders became a small but constant vibration and I felt the room moving. The crack under the door had been shining with light, but now the darkness crept quickly from left to right.
When the shaking stopped, the outside was silent. The light under the door had completely vanished. Against my better judgment, I decided I needed to confirm the room led elsewhere. I opened the door, and a grey wall was blocking the exit and the doorway was sealed. The old danger had passed, but I became acutely aware that I was in a new surroundings now.
If I had a normal body, the hairs on the back of my neck would be standing at attention like a guilty soldier during an inspection. I’d experienced this feeling before. When you think you're alone but your body knows better. Only it wasn’t just knowing. I was sure the gravity had doubled since I’d entered. There was a presence in this room and its attention fell like a heavy hand that pushed down upon me.
Slowly and with great effort, I took several uncertain steps to turn myself around. I got an overwhelming sense that this room did not belong here. An orb of fire on the left illuminated the rest of the room. The floor was patterned, not like tile, it was as if a perfectly cut gem had been unfolded. Yet the stones' dark red and black colour rolled like mist in a gentle breeze. The walls were a shiny cobblestone, and where stars formed constellations, the wall had a holographic card effect. Different images of dividing bubbles and fire among others I couldn’t understand, they leapt so violently out from the walls I had to avert my gaze.
The pressure that had grown in my head found instant relief. Then the room instantly grew dimmer and I looked towards the fire. A glassy orb retained its size, but inside I saw a triangle. I took increasingly difficult steps over to get a better look. Its rounded top gave it away immediately. A person sat cross-legged. Their form was a silhouette in the light, then they expanded and so too did the flame. The full cycle played out before me. At the height of the blaze, it began to swirl and was sucked downwards before returning to its lesser state.
To my surprise, I felt fatigue growing, with each step towards the centre of the room the burden lightened, but the weight of being watched was constant. Opposite the door, I noticed something glowing on what looked to be a mix of alien laboratory table and a podium. The glowing object had two handles on either side of a bowl, its shape slimmed down and then widened at the bottom. As I approached, I felt unburdened, even elated. The object had a large star shape and an inscription below it.
“A toast to a rising star.”
I couldn’t understand how I could read it despite the metal trophy looking like it would begin to melt any second now. Inside a black liquid bubbled. It had a sweet smell, but not one I could place. I licked my chapped lips. In fact, I felt a certain thirst had suddenly grown, the back of my throat was uncomfortably dry. Then it hit me. I reached up and felt my face. It was back. My nose and mouth had returned to me.
Then I took a step back. A temptation had been thrust upon me, but I was not so impulsive. If I were to drink, it would be of my own choosing. On the right side of the room, the light had just turned its brightest, and I could just make out an altar with something beneath it. The gravity increased at a much quicker rate. I circled around the middle so I would not block the light. As I staggered, I could see a cushion below what was indeed an altar. To what? I could not tell, but I could see the imprints of two knees where others had knelt.
There was a bias on full display. Something did not want me over here. I wondered if, since a prayer got me into this wretched hospital, it might be possible for a prayer to get me out. A cynical voice whispered in the back of my mind that this was more likely a cruel joke. The more I thought, the less the clues I tried to piece together meant anything. A coin toss for the fate of my soul. To drink of greatness or to kneel before one.
[[Take A Drink From The Chalice]]
[[Kneel Down And Pray]] I came in through a misguided prayer. Was it so unreasonable to believe the entrance may also be an exit? With all the coercion pulling me to the cup, this has to be against its will, whatever ‘it’ was. I would not stumble on the last hurdle between me and freedom.
I lined my legs up then fell to my knees before the altar. With my head bowed I began to pray.
Please, send me back. I don’t…
Before I could utter another word I felt the familiar weight fall upon my right shoulder. In that warm, firm grip I could sense…confusion? Realisation? Amusement.
It did not laugh as I knew laughter, but I had little doubt as its hand shook and I felt the pulses and vibrations.
“Twice blessed, once cursed. We meet again for the second time, forever. Your. Wish. Is Granted.”
I blinked and I found myself in my hospital room. It was sunny. My family was standing at the foot of my bed. Frozen. That presence lingered with its hand on my shoulder.
“Have you ever considered the shape of eternity? You take two points of infinity and curl them around until they meet. Which point are you? Head or tail? Some would say both, but right now you are the head about to swallow yourself whole. Your kind call it ouroboros.”
My mind boiled, and as each bubble of thought rose I felt a lid it had put on top and none truly surfaced.
“I am not interested. For I am not really here. Just as those people, that family you see before you, they are gone too. You are a ghost out of time and I am an echo. This moment of us may be crystallised here with you, but you are alone.”
It paused, a moment dragged on and I felt its hand slowly slipping away.
“Does eternity have an off-ramp? Not even I can say.”
The hand finally left. I could feel it go, but it took something with it. What was it? What was what?
I winced in pain. It was hard to breathe. My family talked in hushed tones, and the warmth of the sun spread onto my leg. I could feel it now, drawing closer. My end was near.
[[A Dying Wish]]