cat petting simulator 2016

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<<set $petherhead = 0;$petherheadagain = 0;$petherbelly = 0;$petherbellyagain = 0;$petherback = 0;$petherbackagain = 0>>your cat is here. her tail is raised high, the tip twitching slightly with friendly interest. her eyes are big and bright like marbles of coloured glass and as you stare into them with wonder, she blinks slowly, right at you. [[blink back slowly]] [[reach out]] [[bap her nose]]

you press her nose gently and laugh a little as she narrows her eyes and presses back ever so slightly, probably confused by this weird human display of affection but eager to participate nonetheless. the pitch of her purr changes slightly; if she had the correct mouth parts she'd probably be using them right now to affectionately call you silly. or at least that's what you like to think. <<display navigation>>

you reach out your hand. your kitty is moving already, as if reading your mind, and she meets you halfway, leaning into your hand, rubbing her cheek against your palm. her little furry face is probably the second softest thing you've ever touched (the first being of course her little furry belly). gosh. that is one heck of a cute cat you got here. <<display navigation>>

you slowly blink back at your cat. she closes her eyes contentedly and doesn't open them for a long while. you think maybe she has fallen asleep, but when she looks back at you it becomes evident that this has in fact been another blink, even slower than the last one. the stare she's giving you now has a slightly more expectant quality to it. she wants something. [[blink back slower]] [[bap her nose]] [[reach out]]

two can play that game. your eyes close with all the speed of a descending glacier and you're very proud of yourself -- up until the moment you open them again and notice that your kitty has apparently gotten bored and left the room. [[dang it]]

well, that's ok. she'll come back eventually, and when she does, you'll know not to get sucked into this game again. won't you? [[play again?|start][$petherhead = 0;$petherheadagain = 0;$petherbelly = 0;$petherbellyagain = 0;$petherback = 0;$petherbackagain = 0;]]

she closes her eyes and purrs her little heart out as you rub her forehead, cheeks, back of her neck, behind her ears, all those spots she likes the most. when you scratch her chin, she starts drooling. literally drooling. [[haha aww]] [[haha eww]]

she stretches and wiggles in a commendable effort to make your hand touch as much of her back as possible. you stroke her from head to tail, nice and slow, feeling her spine bones under a healthy layer of muscle and fat and fur. she's so cute you just want to grab her and squeeze her, though of course you won't, because she's a small animal and you're bigger and stronger and could easily hurt her this way, and you'd never ever do that. ever. you settle for some pets. <<display navigation>>

she rolls to her side, then the other one, then finally settles with all four of her paws up in the air and her head cocked to the side, looking at you with a mostly inviting yet slightly mischievious glance in her eye. "here's my belly," her eyes seem to say. "dare you pet it?" why yes, yes you dare. you reach out slowly, carefully, ready to withdraw your hand if at any point she decides she no longer wants it anywhere near her tummy. nothing happens, so you give her stomach a tentative pet. she closes her eyes; encouraged by her approval, you give her some more rubs, combing your fingers through her soft fur. you feel her chest rise and fall slowly, calming you until you close your eyes for a bit. when you open them again, you see her look at you affectionately. she blinks. <<display navigation>>

it's a little gross but mostly endearing. you take a pic with your phone, send it to everyone, then wipe away the drool. she doesn't even open her eyes. <<display navigation>>

it's kinda gross but mostly endearing. you take a pic with your phone, consider sending it to everyone but think better of it, then wipe away the drool. she doesn't even open her eyes. <<display navigation>>

you reach out to touch her tum again, but this time she grabs your hand with her paws and kicks at it with her hind legs, claws mostly sheathed (angry or not, she rarely ever scratches you). she gets up, all indignant-like, and relocates a few paces away from you, giving you a look from the corner of her eye. "now look at what you've gone and done," says that look. "ruined your last chance ever to pet me is what you've done," says that look, but you know her well enough to be sure she's just messing with you. give her some time -- half an hour is usually enough -- and she'll be back for more pets. this time around you'll know better than to touch her tummy twice. won't you? [[play again?|start][$petherhead = 0;$petherheadagain = 0;$petherbelly = 0;$petherbellyagain = 0;$petherback = 0;$petherbackagain = 0;]]

you rub her chin for a while and she rests her head on your hand and stays like that. you reach out with your other hand, pet her behind the ears, trace patterns on her forehead with one finger. on your palm you can feel the steady vibrations of her purr. her head barely weighs anything. <<display navigation>>

you can feel her muscles relax as you continue to pet her back with long, steady strokes. her breath is slow and her purr is loud. she lies motionless, the picture of serenity, except for the occasional twitch of the very tip of her tail that tells you she's still awake. <<display navigation>>

<<if $petherhead is 0>> [[pet her head][$petherhead = 1]] <<elseif $petherhead is 1 and $petherheadagain is 0>> [[pet her head again][$petherheadagain = 1]] <<elseif $petherheadagain is 1>> <<endif>>\ <<if $petherback is 0>> [[pet her back][$petherback = 1]] <<elseif $petherback is 1 and $petherbackagain is 0>> [[pet her back again][$petherbackagain = 1]] <<elseif $petherbackagain is 1>> <<endif>>\ <<if $petherbelly is 0>> [[pet her belly][$petherbelly = 1]] <<elseif $petherbelly is 1 and $petherbellyagain is 0>> [[pet her belly again][$petherbellyagain = 1]] <<elseif $petherbellyagain is 1>> <<endif>>\ <<if $petherheadagain is 1 and $petherbackagain is 1 and $petherbelly is 1>> [[this feels pretty nice, doesn't it?]] <<endif>>

you ask her that out loud. by way of an answer she gives you a look of unadulterated bliss that's so sweet you can feel it in your teeth (but it's okay because it's your kitty and you love her) and closes her eyes again. they don't open for a very long time. they're still closed when you tire of watching them and close your own for just a little moment. you breathe deeply, stroke your kitty with absentminded affection, and think about nothing. an indeterminate amount of time passes before you are woken by the unmistakable sensation of being sniffed. you open your eyes to find that there's a soft pink nose right in your face, along with a bunch of tickling whiskers and a pair of curious yellow eyes staring right at you. seems like your cat decided at some point to lay down on top of you and sleep there. now that you're awake, she greets you with a meow. three guesses as to what she wants. (it's probably pets.) [[play again?|start][$petherhead = 0;$petherheadagain = 0;$petherbelly = 0;$petherbellyagain = 0;$petherback = 0;$petherbackagain = 0]]