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<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_d9076b4cc24b488d821305090e02c35c~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_85,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/Comedymasks_edited.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"Alright kid..."
Albert mumbles with a cigar in his mouth, half interested.
Give me a tight five minutes tonight. If it goes well, we can talk about longer.
And uh....I guess money".
You take a deep breath and head towards the stage.
It's [[Showtime|Showtime]].
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/836867023&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-3" title="Jeremy Frutkin - Track 3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jeremy Frutkin - Track 3</a></div>" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_fe6f3834aaea40b6ad939e66a2a9d896~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_85,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/Mic2.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
The club doesn’t look like anything special, like all truly special places.
A room of maybe fifty people in various states of drunk and bored are lounging around.
You take the microphone in your hand.
[[How we doing tonight folks?]]
[[GOOOOODDDDD MORNNNIIINNGGGG VIETNAMMMMMMMMM!]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7cc96c0952ae470ab6f12d4baf24ca9c~mv2.jpg/v1/crop/x_0,y_125,w_1280,h_599/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_85,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/CrowdedBar.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
You're smart enough to not wait for an answer.
Instead you decide to keep in steady and simple.
"Well I'm glad you’re here, because we all know the best comics come on at 12:47am on a Tuesday".
This gets a light chuckle out of the group. It's enough energy for you to regain a little confidence.
[[My parents...]]
[[Let's get political....]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/834871171&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-2" title="Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2</a></div>" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_770d82e9c93348908fa2f5eda368a78f~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/Pixabay%20Audience%20Closer%20Blue.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
You have been to funerals that were livelier.
"I've been to funerals that were livelier"!
Though it shouldn't be possible, you could swear the room actually got quieter.
A sharp pang of fear stabs your belly.
[[Alright. Rough start. But hear me out...]]
[[Ya'll ever noitce...]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"...Loved me, they did. The problem is they both also loved someone else".
The audience perks up as you regale them with an honest and darkly funny account of growing up with your parent’s infidelity.
You hear audible laughs, groans, and gasps.
Business is picking up!
Next up....
[[School as a child]]?
[[That time you pooped your pants]]?
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/834871171&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-2" title="Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2</a></div>" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
You roll the dice.
You speak truthfully about your criticism of the current administration.
"Remember back when we said things couldn't get worse?
...Please stop saying that".
A majority of the crowd chuckles and lets out a cathartic agreement.
However, one voice yells out above the rest.
"If you don’t like this country, then leave"!
[[Ignore him]]
[[Engange]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_770d82e9c93348908fa2f5eda368a78f~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/Pixabay%20Audience%20Closer%20Blue.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"Comedy is hard..."
You sheepishly admit.
"But if I can’t make you folks laugh...then I'll buy everyone here their next drink"!
You immediately regret the words as they leave your mouth.
The crowd cheers.
But remarkably...they don't laugh.
[[So, a pony walks into a bar...]]
[[Two nuns are driving in a car...]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_770d82e9c93348908fa2f5eda368a78f~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/Pixabay%20Audience%20Closer%20Blue.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"That women just take forever to get ready"?
There is an audible groan from the audience.
"What’s up with that, right!?"
The silence is the loudest thing you have ever heard.
"...right?"
You ask again, starting to become more self-aware.
[[Airplane food]]
[[That time your cousin went to the zoo]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"I was overweight as a kid. Gym class, excuse me, P.E. was not my finest hour"...
The crowd appreciates your vulnerability and candor. They laugh along with you through your awkward tales from years ago.
This train of thought seems to be working well!
[[You ever been dumped?]]
[[I once walked in on my parents doing it]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/834871171&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-2" title="Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2</a></div>" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_770d82e9c93348908fa2f5eda368a78f~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/Pixabay%20Audience%20Closer%20Blue.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"I'll never forget my father's face...."
You get some chuckles from the crowd. Some are definitely grossed out, but it’s not a total dud.
Pressing on...
[[So, a pony walks into a bar...]]
[[I once walked in on my parents doing it]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"Sir I would love too, but your country has locked me in here with you.... and quite frankly, you're starting to smell a little bit".
The crowd laughs!
...And the man, belligerent, attempts to rush the stage.
[[Run (END)]]
[[Pick up the microphone stand]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/834871171&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-2" title="Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2</a></div>" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_770d82e9c93348908fa2f5eda368a78f~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/Pixabay%20Audience%20Closer%20Blue.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
If you don't see him, he doesn’t exist.
You tell yourself, almost believing it.
"So, the economy, they should be calling it..."
"HEY FLATHEAD"! Your drunken foe yells.
"These colors don't run! USA! USA!"
You can almost smell the whiskey from the stage as you self-consciously feel your head for reassurance.
[[Airplane food]]
[[Engange]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_770d82e9c93348908fa2f5eda368a78f~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/Pixabay%20Audience%20Closer%20Blue.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"He orders a drink. His voice is raspy".
"Sore throat"? The bartender asks.
"No, little horse" he replies.
Some of the crowd, despite their better judgement, actually laughs.
How will you continue your set?
[[Airplane food]]
[[That time your cousin went to the zoo]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_b2f1a95e85a4488fb95fad751bcecbf9~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/YellowFaceThumbsDownPixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
As you stop to catch your breath backstage, your first thought is relief that you are safe. Your second is that you need a gym membership.
"Kid..."
Albert's cigar lights up the dark.
"If you think I'm paying you to cut and run...
you are dumber than you look".
He takes a long puff of his cigar.
"Keeping running and don’t ever come back".
Comedy is hard.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
You grab the microphone stand.
You are ready to strike or brace yourself as needed.
...luckily, security grabs him within less than a foot of the stage.
As they drag him out, the crowd begins cheering louder and louder.
He is cursing you all the way to the door.
He is thrown out on to the cold, hard pavement outside.
[[One more thing (END)]]
[[Contiune with your set]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/834871171&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-2" title="Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2</a></div>" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"Hey pal..."
You smirk.
"If you don’t like it...leave".
The crowd uproars with laughter.
Tonight, is a good night.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
As the crowd begins to settle back down, you resist the urge to lean into the unpredictability. You remember your set and try your best to stick to the plan.
[[When I was a kid...(END)]]
[[Kids today...]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_b2f1a95e85a4488fb95fad751bcecbf9~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/YellowFaceThumbsDownPixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
You are rattled.
"What’s the deal..."
The boos are almost immediate. They have heard this before. Worst of all, they know you have a well.
"Boring!"
Someone yells from the middle of the club.
[[Mercifully end this]]
[[You're not wrong, but...]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_b2f1a95e85a4488fb95fad751bcecbf9~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/YellowFaceThumbsDownPixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"So, there we were, in front of the monkey cage"...
Predictably, it is a story that ends up with flying poop.
You get what appear to be some sympathy chuckles, but really you could do better.
You see a woman sitting in the front row, with a blue dress.
[[Thanks for comming out, where are you from? (END)]]
[[Whats a girl like you doing in a place like this? (END)]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
You tell stories about your childhood for the next few minutes.
Some happy. Some sad. Some outrageous. All funny.
You feel a personal connection with the audience. You were genuine. They respected that.
"Thank you so much and goodnight"!
You head backstage. You take a big sigh of relief. You can feel a smile on your face.
Albert comes bouncing the hall.
"Kid..." he starts.
"How would you like to perform here every week"?
He hands you fifty dollars and a cigar.
Tonight, was a good night.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_770d82e9c93348908fa2f5eda368a78f~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/Pixabay%20Audience%20Closer%20Blue.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"Always dancing. What’s up with that?"
You spin a long yarn that starts out funny... but after a while just seems like your picking on children.
"We get it!" Someone yells.
"You hate kids"!
You know how to handle a heckler; you are not afraid.
"I'm about to add your parents to the list of things I hate, for making you, pal"! You taunt back.
The man quietly gets up out of his seat.
[[You gonna leave like the last guy? (END)]]
[[Watch what he does (END)]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_770d82e9c93348908fa2f5eda368a78f~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/Pixabay%20Audience%20Closer%20Blue.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes"
"When suddenly a vampire jumps on the roof".
"One turns to the other and says: Quick! Show him your cross"!
"The nun rolls down the window and exclaims I'm very disappointed you!"
...You envision cartoon tumbleweeds rolling across the club. A mixture of groans and apathy finally set in.
[[End your set (END)]]
[[Solider on]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_770d82e9c93348908fa2f5eda368a78f~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/Pixabay%20Audience%20Closer%20Blue.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"Tough crowd...tough crowd". You say, trying to play it cool while wiping the flop sweat from your face.
You scan your mind quickly for something, anything, to work with to get you out of this mess.
"Hey how about the guy who runs this place, Albert"?
The crowd looks at you, vaguely interested.
[[He looks like hes 40 going on 90 (END)]]
[[First time I met him, I was scared..(END)]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"Charleston, SC!" She exclaims half excited, half nervous.
You smile.
"Chucktown pride!" You exclaim.
Having lived there for many years yourself, you have a great interaction and the perfect Segway to tell stories about your years in the American south.
"Thank you everybody and goodnight"!
The crowd gives you a healthy applause as you walk off stage.
You walk with pride down the backstage corridor.
About halfway down the hall, Albert steps out of the shadows to greet you.
"Not bad kid. Not bad at all".
He puffs his cigar.
"See you next week". He grumbles.
He places thirty dollars in your hand.
Tonight, was a good night.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/834871171&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-2" title="Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2</a></div>" />
</audio><img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_b2f1a95e85a4488fb95fad751bcecbf9~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/YellowFaceThumbsDownPixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"Regretting being here, talking to you".
The crowd gets its first big laugh since you have been on stage.
You stammer and fluster.
"Oh yeah well you...uh...uh..."
The crowd laughs. At you, not with you.
"Forget this"! You yell as you storm off stage.
You head backstage and storm right pass Albert, still smoking his cigar.
You head through the backdoor into the night air.
"What am I doing with my life". You mutter.
You head to a bar across town, to contemplate the choices you've made.
Comedy is hard.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_770d82e9c93348908fa2f5eda368a78f~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/Pixabay%20Audience%20Closer%20Blue.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"I'm nervous, if I'm being honest".
You stare into the void.
"Is it....too late to ask for a do over"?
Half the crowd groans. The other half shrugs and makes a 'whatever' motion.
[[I never understood why people do stand up...(END)]]
[[I guess that was a dumb question...(END)]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_b2f1a95e85a4488fb95fad751bcecbf9~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/YellowFaceThumbsDownPixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
The man nearly looks right through you.
A few seconds pass.
He rushes the stage!
Next thing you know... you wake up in a hospital bed.
Albert is standing over you.
"I don't really like you. I just don't want to get sued". He mumbles.
Comedy is hard.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_770d82e9c93348908fa2f5eda368a78f~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/Pixabay%20Audience%20Closer%20Blue.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
The man begins to sob.
The wailing is intense and goes on seemingly for an eternity.
"You....want to talk about it"? You stammer.
You and the man share a mic for the next few minutes as he is telling the horror story that is his life.
When you both finally leave the stage, you get a standing ovation.
You head backstage.
The first person you see, is Albert.
"Hey Dr. Phil!" He laughs.
"That was...unusual. Even for this club".
You nod in agreement.
"We could use more unusual".
He takes a pull of his cigar.
"See you next week".
He hands you twenty dollars.
Tonight, was a strange night.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"It's somehow one of the bravest and dumbest things a person can do".
You wax poetic on the very nature of stand up for the rest of your set.
The crowd is engaged, though it is not the uproar of laughter you had planned for in your head.
"Thanks everyone, and good night"!
You here a solid round of applause as you walk off stage.
Albert is there waiting for you, twenty dollars in hand and cigar in mouth.
"Nice turn around kid".
You can’t hold back your smile.
"Not the best set I've ever seen. ...But I'm interested."
He puffs his cigar
"See you next week".
Tonight, was a good night.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/834871171&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-2" title="Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2</a></div>" />
</audio><img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_b2f1a95e85a4488fb95fad751bcecbf9~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/YellowFaceThumbsDownPixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"Sorry I wasted your time everyone. Thanks anyway. Goodnight".
You walk off stage, feeling dejected.
Albert is leaning up against the wall.
"Hope you're better at your day job then this, kid".
He grumbles, cigar still in mouth.
"I'll see myself out". You say, dejected.
The cool night air hits you hard as you open the back door.
You've learned some important lessons tonight.
Comedy is hard.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_b2f1a95e85a4488fb95fad751bcecbf9~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/YellowFaceThumbsDownPixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"Alright a deal is a deal" you mutter....
"Let me just go get my wallet..."
You run off stage as fast as your feet can carry you.
You are so shell shocked from what just happened you run right into Albert.
He looks at you with disgust.
"They make it look easy on TV, huh?"
...you nod silently.
"You better sneak out the back. Otherwise you are going to be even more broke then when you started".
You nod again, appreciating this small gesture of mercy.
Comedy is hard.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_b2f1a95e85a4488fb95fad751bcecbf9~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/YellowFaceThumbsDownPixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
You hear some chuckles from the audience.
"And how does someone that size fit in a place this small?"
Laughter. Sweet, glorious laughter. You are intoxicated.
Like a shark smelling blood, you keep attacking.
"You know he barely pays us for the honor of this humiliation"?
This goes on for the rest of your set.
You get a mild applause as you head back.
Waiting for you at the curtain, is Albert.
"...No hard feelings, Al"? You ask sheepishly.
The impact hits you so hard you could have sworn a building was dropped on you.
You awake on the street, outside the club. Albert is icing his fist, glaring at you from the window.
Comedy is hard.
Albert's fist was harder.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"But to be fair, this is a scary thing us fools do when we get up here".
The crowd agrees.
"He gave me a chance though. So, I’m grateful. I don’t know if we are going to be sharing cigars anytime soon though".
You go on honestly about things you find funny, sad, and scary. The audience enjoys the ride.
"Thank you and goodnight"!
As you head backstage Albert is waiting for you, his cigar surrounded by a smile.
"So, I'm scary huh"?
"Not as scary as them". You laugh, pointing to the corner.
"Well come on back next week and face your fears some more".
He puffs his cigar and hands you twenty-five dollars.
Tonight, was a good night.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/834871171&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-2" title="Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2</a></div>" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"Suddenly you understand every sad song you used to make fun of".
You go on for a bit, being self-deprecating, vulnerable and truthful.
The crowd is enjoying the ride they are taking with you.
You feel something better than confidence. You feel comfort.
[[School Dances]]
[[Death]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/834871171&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-2" title="Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2</a></div>" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_770d82e9c93348908fa2f5eda368a78f~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/Pixabay%20Audience%20Closer%20Blue.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"Let me tell you, you don't know the meaning of the word awkward until you have seen that".
Some of the crowd laughs, some are uncomfortable. It's a split decision.
You may have gotten a little too personal for some people's liking, but some of the crowd are still definitely on board!
Where do you want to take this?
[[Death]]
[[Stick with your parents doing it (END)]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"Why were they so concerned about how far apart we were? You...do understand we are wearing clothes, right?"
The crowd laughs along with you. Your set is relatable.
"Why did they always serve punch? What....even is punch"?
They chuckle along with you.
You see a signal from the back that you are short on time. What would you like your last piece of material to be?
[[Video games]]
[[Traffic]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/834871171&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-2" title="Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2</a></div>" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_770d82e9c93348908fa2f5eda368a78f~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/Pixabay%20Audience%20Closer%20Blue.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"Dying is one of the most expensive things you'll ever do".
The topic is dark, funny, and even a little sad.
The crowd is finding it relatable and interesting. Even if they are not exactly falling out of their chairs with laughter.
All in all, they are entertained.
Feeling their interest has bolstered your confidence.
How will you continue your set?
[[Social Ettiquite at the gym]]
[[The vast conspiracy of the lizard people (END)]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"There are two types of people in life. People who like video games and people who are lying".
The crowd chuckles.
You go on about something you love, and it shows. The audience appreciates your passion and enthusiasm even if they aren't falling out of their seats.
"Mobile games? You should see my mom on candy crush. She's like one of those chess masters in the park... except she doesn't leave the couch"!
The crowd laughs along with you.
You see a signal from the back that your time is almost up. How do you want to end your set?
[[Appreciative thanks (END)]]
[[One more joke (END)]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/834871171&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-2" title="Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jeremy Frutkin - Track 2</a></div>" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"Always when you got somewhere to be right"?
The audience groans.
Predictable and boring. You've gone from relatable to hackneyed.
"...Not every bit is a winner". You tell the crowd and yourself.
They agree. At least you are honest.
You see a signal from the back of the room that your time is almost up.
How do you want to end your set?
[[Appreciative thanks (END)]]
[[One more joke (END)]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"This was my first time trying this and I just wanted to say thank you all for making it not terrible".
The audience claps.
"Thats it for me, good night"!
You get a thunderous applause as you walk backstage through the curtain.
Albert is waiting for you the moment you step into the corridor.
"Kid...."
His cigar is surrounded by a full smile.
How would you like to perform here every week?
You're so happy you almost can't get the words out.
"It would be a pleasure".
You shake hands. He gives you fifty dollars.
Tonight, was a good night.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"What do you a call a cow with no legs"?
".... ground beef!"
The audience groans.
You chuckle this time.
"Alright folks, I'm going to quit while I'm ahead. Have a good night"!
You still get a modest applause as you walk through the curtain.
Backstage, Albert is waiting for you.
"Ground beef huh"?
He puffs his cigar.
"...I didn't exactly stick the landing". You admit.
Albert laughs.
"Any crash you can walk away from, kid".
He hands you thirty dollars.
"See you next week".
Tonight, was a good night.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_b2f1a95e85a4488fb95fad751bcecbf9~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/YellowFaceThumbsDownPixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
You found something that works and your sticking to it.
...However there comes a point when you are just beating a very awkward horse.
"Enough already"! someone yells.
You realize you have been talking about the same thing for the past 3 minutes.
"I'm going to quit while I'm uh...not ahead". You tell the audience.
"Good night and thank you"!
You hear a few pity claps as you walk back through the curtain.
Albert is waiting for you.
"Things change fast" He says, through a cloud of cigar smoke.
"Yeah..." You say dejectedly.
"Still....I've seen worse." He says stoic as ever.
"Learn from this. Try again next week".
He lumbers away.
Comedy is hard.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_7b30fd39c8ae44fc8133d428f64c1728~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_908,h_425,al_c,q_90/Thumbs%20Up%20Pixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"There is almost no better place to play the I can’t see you and I can't hear you game".
The crowd laughs.
You feel that your path has been honest, funny, and true to your vision.
You see someone in the back signal that your time is almost up.
How would you like to end your set?
[[Appreciative thanks (END)]]
[[One more joke (END)]]
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_b2f1a95e85a4488fb95fad751bcecbf9~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/YellowFaceThumbsDownPixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
The crowd laughs.
In earnest, you begin a rant about how our world leaders are reptilian overlords wearing disguises.
The crowd is getting uncomfortable, if not concerned.
By the time you realize you may have gone a bit too far, you mercifully see a signal from the back telling you to wrap up.
"Thanks everyone and good night"! You say, scampering off stage.
There are a few confused pity claps behind you as you walk backstage.
Albert is waiting for you in the corridor.
"Kid...." He says, puffing his cigar.
"Even if I were a reptile, I would have thought that sucked".
He shows you the door.
Comedy is hard.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_b2f1a95e85a4488fb95fad751bcecbf9~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_940,h_440,al_c,q_90,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01/YellowFaceThumbsDownPixabay.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
"Sorry I wasted your time everyone..." You stammer.
"Good night."
You scamper off stage as quickly as you can, without fully running.
You head through the curtains and see Albert in the corridor.
Before he can get a word out, you quickly say:
"Thanks for the opportunity. This isn’t for me".
You head out into the cool night air to a local bar.
You contemplate your choices.
Comedy is hard.
THE END
<audio autoplay>
<source src="<iframe width="100%" height="300" scrolling="no" frameborder="no" allow="autoplay" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=https%3A//api.soundcloud.com/tracks/831681196&color=%23ff5500&auto_play=true&hide_related=false&show_comments=true&show_user=true&show_reposts=false&show_teaser=true&visual=true"></iframe><div style="font-size: 10px; color: #cccccc;line-break: anywhere;word-break: normal;overflow: hidden;white-space: nowrap;text-overflow: ellipsis; font-family: Interstate,Lucida Grande,Lucida Sans Unicode,Lucida Sans,Garuda,Verdana,Tahoma,sans-serif;font-weight: 100;"><a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin" title="Jaydotremy" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Jaydotremy</a> · <a href="https://soundcloud.com/jeremy-frutkin/jeremy-frutkin-track-1mp3" title="Track 1 mp3" target="_blank" style="color: #cccccc; text-decoration: none;">Track 1 mp3</a></div>"; type="audio/mpeg; codecs=mp3" />
</audio>
<img src="https://static.wixstatic.com/media/eab2f2_14a62eb9779841ca9d2b1991efe9765d~mv2.png/v1/fill/w_910,h_426,al_c,lg_1,q_90/choice-2692575_960_720.webp" width="500" height="300" alt="Two foxes">
Welcome to Stand-Up Simulator!
It's your very first time trying stand-up comedy...what could go wrong?
Your choices matter.
Break a leg!
[[Backstage]]