<img src="https://i.imgur.com/pksM9NB.jpg" width="100%">
Kaiho
Written by J-H Reedlake
Art by Lexa.us
Made with Twine 2.3.9
Formatting Harlowe 3.1.0
AdvX Game Jam 2020
Theme "A Good Time"
[[Start the journey]]<img style="width:100%;" src="https://i.imgur.com/7FE48C4.jpg">
Hospital facility was huge, with endless corridors. Sterile white walls, blue doors, everywhere. These corridors were familiar from many years. Ever since childhood.
Waiting areas also hadn't changed. Seats, old TV running the same soap opera reruns. One thing had changed though. Nowadays people did their doctor times remotely, as technology had progressed quite a bit. So, waiting area was quiet. No one was there, except him. Nowadays people came to hospital if they needed special treatment.
As usual, doctors were, late. How could they be behind the schedule, when nurse said on the voice call few days ago, that there weren't other patients today?
Time passed. Waiting felt like an eternity, until one of the blue doors opened and a tall man in long white coat stepped out.
*"Kaira!"* that man shouted.
*[["That's me."]]*They shook hands and went inside the room.
*"Please, have a seat."* doctor said politely.
After both sat down, doctor opened the Kaira's patient file on the terminal and quickly browsed it through.
*"Renne Kaira. You have been here before because of your mental problems?"*
*[["Yes."]]**"Right."* doctor said as bluntly as Renne said.
*"On your last psychiatrist visit, Mrs. Rautavirta has written here "We suspect patient might have some block on his mind, that needs to be checked. Recommending reliving memory to find out". What kind of block she meant?"* doctor asked, with great curiosity.
*[["Apparently, there is a reason why I'm still alone."]]*
*[["Ever thought of love you experienced when you were young?"]]**"Aaah, loneliness. So common these days. Thanks to technology and improved services, people mostly communicate through voice and video calls"* doctor said, like a broken record. Renne had heard this so many times on the news.
*"Still alone? Aaaaaaaah!!"* doctor seemed to realize something.
*"You're meaning that you don't have love in your life!"*
Unfortunately, doctor was right.
*"Why would man as old as you would be still hung up on such old flame?"*
*[["Because it is the closest chance I had to being in a relationship"]]**"Well yes I do! I sometimes think of few past crushes. Mostly how they are doing. But then I look at my partner, thinking that I'm happy to have found such a gentle man in my life!"*
Doctor sure was happy twist knife in the wound.
*"So you want to go back and relive that memory, to find out what exactly happened?"* This time doctor's tone was actually concerned.
*[["Exactly."]]**"Understandable. I sometimes think of few past crushes. Mostly how they are doing. But then I look at my partner, thinking that I'm happy to have found such a gentle man in my life!"*
Doctor sure was happy twist knife in the wound.
*"So you want to go back and relive that memory, to find out what exactly happened?"* This time doctor's tone was actually concerned.
[["Exactly."]]*"Well, we do have a machine just for that!"* and doctor pointed out the other door in the room.
*"Follow me and I introduce it to you!"* and doctor rose up from his chair. Renne did the same and followed the doctor.
[[To the mysterious room]]Doctor opened the door and they went in.
The room had similar colour scheme as rest of the hospital, so that wasn't surprising. Room itself was quite a bit bigger than doctor's room, with weird big device in the middle of it. One side had window, which Renne could see some weird control panel, presumably to control the big device.
*"This is a device we call "Flashbacker" It's a technological marvel!"*
*[["How exactly it does work?"]]*Doctor seemed happy to show. Renne guessed he was a technology nerd, like him.
*"This is a tank, where the patient goes. It opens by pressing this red button here."* Doctor pressed it and tank opened. Renne and doctor walked back a little, as tank opened.
*"Tank has a place for the patient. You can see lots of traces and that helmet. Patient puts the helmet on and traces light up. I, and nurses, then put the patient to sleep and navigate patient's thoughts to the right place. We then monitor health. After patient has hopefully opened the mental block, we wake up and check-up is everything okay."*
*[["Thanks for the explanation. What do you mean with "hopefully" though?"]]**"Well..."* doctor seemed to doubt.
*"Patients can open the mental block. That has always happened. 90% cases patients are fine. But sometimes the memory is so rough, that patients might lose their mind. Or even worse, life."*
Slight panic devoured Renne. Was he one of the unfortunate cases?
*"I can see you're worried about yourself. I've read your file and talked with Mrs. Rautavirta. I'm sure you have enough will to go through this!"*
Doctor sure seemed confident. That helped Renne to be more confident about this too.
*[["Thanks, doctor? You forgot to introduce yourself."]]**"Well I sure am! I was wondering how long it takes you to recognize your old dorm mate!"*
World sure is small. Renne and Veli had been dorm mates years ago, on vocational school. Renne studied cooking, while Veli studied ICT. To think he would end up being a doctor!
*[["I really didn't look closely, but you sure have changed!"]]**"Well, life sure does wonders!"* Veli laughed.
Then he got suddenly serious and came closer and whispered
*"I'm sure you will get your memories fixed. I remember what happened back then."*
He knew? Veli sure liked to observe what was happening back then.
*[["Thanks mate."]]**"No need to. Anyways, nurse will guide you to changing room. I will start setting up Flashbacker!"* and Veli waved at the nurse in the other room.
Nurse came and said politely
*"Right this way"*
And Renne followed.
[[To the changing room]] Nurse, blonde woman, who seemed older than Renne, showed the way to changing room. She wasn't very talkative person, so Renne decided not to start conversation.
Changing room was on the back of the control room. Nurse opened the door and went in, Renne following her.
Nurse walked to a clothes shelf and asked
*"What's your size? We have S, M and L now, larger than L are now out of stock."*
*[["M."]]**"Hmm, you seem to be slightly larger than M size, but then L would be like you would be wearing a tent. M it is."* nurse said with slight smile on her face. This was probably true, Renne had problems with buying clothes because of that.
Nurse then gave the clothes to Renne and said *"Go behind folding screen. You can leave your clothes there. They won't go anywhere. I'll wait here and won't look."* with grin on her face.
*[["Thank you..."]]*Nurse walked back to the clothes shelf, to arrange it and Renne walked behind the wall.
These clothes were ugly green fabric, that was thin. Guess hospitals still favoured ugly clothing for patients. Renne put them on. Good that pants had strings in them, they wouldn't stay on otherwise. Shirt was okay, bit tight on shoulders, but nothing too horrible.
After clothes were on, Renne realized that hospital floor was cold! Some socks or sandals would be nice. He decided to ask, did they have those.
*[["Do you have any socks or sandals? This floor is cold!"]]**"No, we don't! You won't walking on this floor much!"* nurse shouted.
Bummer. Renne thought she had a point; he would be in a tank shortly. Or maybe it was cold in the tank too. Come to think of it, because of the clothes fabric was so thin, Renne felt slightly chilly.
*"Are you ready?"* nurse shouted.
*[["I'll come out and let's go."]]*Renne walked around the wall, nurse opened the door and Renne followed.
Walk back to the operation room was the same. Nurse wasn't talkative. Renne thought maybe she talked when it was necessary.
Back at the operation room, doctor was doing some adjustments. As they approached, doctor noticed them.
*"Aah, perfect. Just finished changing the trace mat. Old mat was so busted! Anyways, you can get in now, so we can begin!"*
*[["Let's begin"]]*
*[["Will it be cold inside that thing?"]]**"Great! Step in and we'll strap you tight! Just kidding!"* doctor laughed.
Renne stepped in to Flashbacker. He would be lying on it, limbs slightly open. Renne tried to position himself as comfortably as he could. Doctor then put on the helmet. It was white and it had lots of wires coming out of the top.
As helmet touched Renne's head, it felt like it sucked itself in. Renne gasped and doctor noticed it.
*"That helmet sure feels nasty when it does that. No worries. It just makes sure it'll make contact with your head. Goes through even the thickest hair!"*
Doctor sure knew way with words.
*"Okay. I'll close this tank now. I'll make one last contact on the control room, to make sure everything is okay?"*
*[["Thank you."]]**"Cold? Aaah, no it will not! Flashbacker gets warm when it is operating, so it will naturally keep you warm! Those thin clothes are just for comfort. Being naked in that machine would be most beneficial, but many patients complained that it felt slimy in there. So nowadays dress patients in thin clothing."*
Doctor couldn't have explained it better. Renne was sure the operation will go well.
*[["Let's begin"]]**"No problem"* doctor said with confidence and closed the tank.
It was dark. Renne could hear his breathing echoing there. And it was cold.
Time passed and Renne heard start up sound and traces around him lit up in dim yellow light. Didn't burn his eyes, that were used to dark, which was good.
Soon after lights lit, he could hear sound somewhere.
*"Can you hear me, Renne? Everything fine?"*
It was the doctor.
*[["I can hear you and I'm fine"]]**"Great!"*
*"We'll begin the operation. Close your eyes and think of the time in your life you want to go back. Want to tell where you're planning to go?"*
*[["The time I was in vocational school."]]*
*[["Is this relevant to you?"]]**"Aaah yes, as I suspected."*
Seemed to confirm his suspicions.
*"Okay, close your eyes now. You'll soon be at the good times!"*
Good times? Renne thought the same.
It was time close the eyes and think of those times. Good times.
[[Time to go]]*"I guess it's not of my business."* Doctor sounded disappointed.
*"Okay, close your eyes now. You'll soon be at your destination!"*
Reassuring.
It was time close the eyes and think of those times. Good times.
[[Time to go]]
Renne's eyes were closed. He breath deep, in and out, like he was going to sleep. Muscles relaxed. Felt like floating in the water and slowly going underwater.
This feeling lasted for quite awhile. Then Renne remembered, he needed to think the moment he wanted go to back. He wanted to go back to his vocational school days. Those days started like he didn't want to be there, but then turned out one of the best periods in his life.
Mainly because that felt like time he was genuinely in love with someone. Renne wanted to relive those days. To remember again, what exactly happened back then.
Then suddenly...
*[["Hey, wake up!"]]*Renne heard a voice he hadn't heard in years. It was one of the classmates. But which one. Was he really there?
*[["What is happening?"]]*Renne opened his eyes slowly.
View of the classroom appeared slowly. It was familiar.
Eyes were opened, but vision still was hazy. He could see figures.
As vision got clearer, he started recognizing figures. They were Renne's old classmates.
But first, he had to look at the person who woke him up.
*[["Hi, thanks for waking me up. And you are?"]]**"I'm Miko. You were asleep. We are on a break, but that is ending soon.*
Miko. He was a nice person. He was also his roommate on the dorm. Renne wanted to have room all by himself, but that sure didn't happen. In the end, their chemistry worked well.
Renne observed the room quickly. Some of the classmates were missing, including the one. This must be the first day. Situation was familiar, even though he didn't remember it.
*[["Nice to meet you Miko. I'm Renne."]]**"Nice to meet you. I'll go back to my place, talk to you later!"* and Miko waved at Renne.
As soon as Miko left, group of people came to the classroom. Mostly younger classmates, girls and two boys. Renne remembered them, but never really interacted with them.
After that, two of best friends in the class.
Nita. One year younger than Renne. Dark hair, with purple stripes. Good friend.
And then the one.
*[["Manta..."]]*Renne whispered her name, quietly.
Manta was one of the younger classmates. She was short. She had short blonde hair. Wasn't the prettiest. But she had a personality, that matched well with Renne.
Their relationship developed slowly. It was a slow burn. Over time, during studies, they talked to each other. She also lived on the student dorm, in different apartment. They also were in contact during free time.
*[["Teacher is coming!"]]*Some girl shouted. Renne snapped out of his concentration.
Short, but sturdy woman walked in. Renne recognized her and couldn't help but to smile: It was Sinikka! Everyone's favourite teacher!
Sinikka felt almost like a friend. She would laugh to Renne's jokes and vice versa. Sinikka liked to say *"Only great minds like you and me would understand our humour!"*
*[["Why my vision is fuzzy?"]]*Suddenly Renne's vision got fuzzy. Lots of bright lights appeared and he couldn't see the classroom anymore.
What was happening? Was that it? Was that enough? Renne started panicking. Wouldn't he experience more?
*"Don't worry Renne. You're in the trance state. Your mind automatically goes to the important moments, that you deem most important"*
Familiar voice. Was that the doctor?
*[["Is that you Doctor Muroma?"]]**"I sure am!"*
Good to know. Otherwise Renne would've thought he had gone insane.
*[["So this goes to the most important moments? That I at least think are?"]]**"Yep. If you went through all your time at the time you were there, it would take several weeks!"*
Made sense.
*"Our gauges show next memory is coming up. Get ready! I won't be bothering you more, we'll see next time when you wake up! Take care!"*
As doctor finished his sentence, Renne's vision started to get blurry again. That feeling was extremely uncomfortable.
*[["Where I'll go next?"]]*Vision started clearing and Renne could hear sounds again. They were his classmates.
When vision got better, ho noticed that they were in the hallway, outside the classroom. Apparently, everyone was waiting. Must have been still the first day.
Right side of the hallway was full of coat racks. Because this hallway was on near the outside wall of the building. Left side had windows, shining daylight, just barely.
Both sides had some distractions. A display of trophies school had won. Pictures of the past. And a huge map of Finland.
Renne was standing next to the map. Some of the classmates knew each other, so they were talking to each other. Manta, Nita and Miko came to look at the map also. It was time to get to know them.
*[["Where is everyone from?]]*Everyone took the bait.
Nita started first.
*"I'm from there."* and she pointed the map to area, that was close to that was considered northern parts of Finland.
*"I live in the skiing centre area with my boyfriend, so I commute every morning here."*
Renne remembered being disappointed when he heard that. It still made him slightly sad. But eventually she became a good friend at least.
*[["That's nice. I've been there once. But how about Miko, was it?"]]*Miko didn't point anything on the map.
*"Yes, I'm Miko. I went to school at this town, but I grew up hour away in a village, that is part of this municipality. I'll be living in the dorm, because it would be too stressful to commute here every morning. How about you, Renne?"*
*[["I'm from hour and half away, from that place. I could commute here every morning, but I need a car for that, which I don't have. I'll be living at the dorm also."]]*Manta laughed a little and pointed at place way south, near the coastal area.
*"I'm from there. Would be bit too tiring to travel six plus hours every day"*
Renne laughed and said
*[["Bah, just an early wake up every day! And sleep early!"]]*
*[["So you'll be living in the dorm also?"]]*Renne liked to joke around quite a bit. It seemed to work in most cases.
*"Hahahaa, true! But I'll be living in the dorm."* Manta laughed back.
Good that humour helped, even everyone was quite shy at this stage. Renne especially had always been quite shy. He never did have many friends, but those few that he had, he cherished the friendship. Generally, he got along with everyone, at least on surface level.
Suddenly vision started to get blurry again. Was this moment over already?
*[["Talking?"]]**"Yep! I wonder what activities dorm master has in store!"* Manta answered, giving a slight smile.
Living in a dorm. That would be a first time for Renne and probably for most students also. Renne had his computer, he didn't need any other free time activities.
Or so he thought.
When that thought process was done, Renne's vision started to get blurry. This was already over?
*[["Talking?"]]*Renne could hear talking. It was teacher Sinikka.
*"Alright. Now it is the best part, tasting! Most of you seemed to make some variety of chocolate cake or at least close to it. Mud cake, mocha brownies, brownies, you name it."*
As vision cleared again, Renne noticed whole class was sitting around big table. Table was filled with sweet pastries. Renne looked at where he was sitting and noticed familiar treat.
This was first time on test kitchen. Usually chef students would practice there or prep something for school events or lunch time. Because this was first time, teacher had decided it was free for all. Everyone could make whatever they wanted.
For some reason everyone opted for something sweet.
*[["Blue cheese tiramisu..."]]*This was what Renne made.
Dark caramel biscuits brushed with coffee. Cream and cream cheese mixture, with blue cheese and of course blue cheese. Something different. He liked to try out new things.
*[["Time to taste!"]]*First it was all the chocolate cake or variants of it. They tasted good, but lack of variety was tiring.
Memory was fuzzy around this time. But Renne sure remembered when it was time for his blue cheese tiramisu.
Ranne picked up the platter.
*[["Okay everyone! This is blue cheese tiramisu."]]*Answer to that seemed to come from everyone's mouth when he tried to offer the treat.
*"EEWWWW! BLUE CHEESE! I'm not trying!"*
Renne remembered the feeling. Disappointment. Sadness. Anger. Was it one or all?
Gladly teacher Sinikka was more eager to try.
*"Give me that!"*
One big scoop.
*"MMMMMMM!!! So good! Anyone else sure they don't want to try?"*
Everyone was quiet.
*[["Well that was bad first impression..."]]*Renne thought no one would care what he had made. Until pleasant voice said something.
*"I'll try it"*
Renne turned to the source of the voice. It came from opposite side of the table, where Renne was sitting.
It was Manta.
*[["You sure?"]]**"Well, I don't like blue cheese that much, but chef has to try everything, right?"*
She shared same values as Renne. There were many things Renne didn't like, but he at least gave them a taste.
Delighted, Renne gave the platter to someone farther away, so they could give it to Manta.
*[["Moment of truth..."]]*Manta took a scoop of the tiramisu and put it into her mouth. She chewed on it and thought long and hard.
She swallowed it. Renne almost couldn't hold his nerves.
After wiping the mouth clean Manta said
*"It was great! Everyone should try it!"*
[[But did they?]]No.
Renne sighed. Even though teacher and Manta tasted Renne's creation, no one else was convinced. It felt like a sign of things to come. Only few would try what he had cooked.
But seeing this moment again, it sure warmed his heart that Manta tried the tiramisu. Renne only remembered the disappointment, until now.
Renne sniffed as his vision started to get blurry again. He almost wanted to savour this moment more, but it was time to move. Where would his mind take him next?
*[["Is this... Bowling?"]]*It was dark, yet there were lots of dim and pretty lights everyone. Renne could hear voices of balls rolling, them hitting the pins. This must have been free time activity, Renne's favourite, glow bowling!
This must have been one of the first times he went to bowling. He had never done it before, as he became from a small town, with no such activity.
Renne looked around. He was sitting, waiting for his turn. There was dorm master, nice guy, liked to tease quite a bit. Miko was standing and waiting for a ball. Then he noticed Manta there, with some other girls, probably form her apartment.
Renne kept looking Manta with such focus, that he didn't noticed someone walking behind him.
Suddenly, familiar voice from the present shouted *"Renne!"* and placed hand on his shoulder.
*[["What the heck?!"]]**"Bwahahahaha, what were you looking Renne?"* said the voice.
Renne turned around and it was Veli. Same Veli, as the doctor Muroma. This time, younger and jollier.
*[["Don't scare me off like that damnit!"]]*
*[["Was just looking at the scoreboard. Why people keep mishearing my name?"]]**"Oh, you're a scaredy-cat? Have to keep that in mind!"* Veli laughed.
Yes, Renne was easily frightened. But in return, he liked to scare other people, whenever he saw an opportunity.
*"So how are you liking bowling? Is it fun?"* Veli asked, while taking a sip of soda he apparently just bought.
*[["It's fun. Don't know the technique well yet. But having nice company makes up for it!"]]**"No you weren't, you were looking at the girls there!"* Veli laughed.
As much he wanted to deny the fact, Renne just decided to look away and be grumpy. Denying would've just made it worse.
*"So how are you liking bowling? Is it fun?"* Veli asked, while taking a sip of soda he apparently just bought.
*[["It's fun. Don't know the technique well yet. But having nice company makes up for it!"]]**"Sure is. Should've said that to girls though!"* Veli teased with the widest grin ever on his face.
Veli sure had changed compared to the present and mellowed out a bit on teasing. However, that made him such a good friend, during the time at vocational school.
Then, Renne noticed Manta walking towards him. Did she have something to say or was he she just going back to her seat?
*"It's your turn soon, René!"* she laughed.
*[["Hahhah... Very funny."]]*Sometimes people misheard Renne's name. Sometimes he was Rene, this time, René. Not the worst thing in the world, but still annoying when it happened.
*"Come on... René... Your ball is already there, waiting!"* Manta hurried.
*[["Okay, I'm going!"]]*Renne got up and gave a smile to Manta, who wasn't looking.
Renne walked to the ball return machine. He picked up a green ball, that was perfect fit for him.
He looked at the end of the track, robot just put back new set of pins. It was time to try again.
As this was his first-time bowling, ball went straight to the gutter. On his second try, he got one pin down. Renne let out loudest sigh ever and went back to the seats.
It was Veli's turn next, so he got up. As Renne and Veli passed each other, Veli gave a wink. Renne wondered why, until he saw a seat next to Manta was free. He could not waste this opportunity. Although at the time, he was still oblivious.
So, he sat down.
*[["So you have bowled before?"]]**"Yeah, I used to go bowling with friends quite often back home. Ny the way, that was awful, even for a first timer!"* Manta giggled.
Yes it was. Renne wanted to beat Manta's score one day! Too bad that never happened.
Manta also studied at gymnasium, on top of vocational school. Renne never asked why she stopped coming to these bowling sessions. So he thought she didn't have time. But bowling was fun, because Miko and Veli were active bowlers.
It was time to move on the next memory, as vision got blurry again.
*[["Food, again?"]]*Smelled like food again. Again, in the kitchen?
As vision got clearer, everyone was now standing around the kitchen area, with a plate in front of them. Renne looked at his plate.
There was a plate, but it looked weird. Glitchy, blurry? Why was that?
Teacher Sinikka started talking.
*"Everyone's soup is ready! Tasting time!"*
Renne remembered. First semester had gone on for quite a while now. Older students had been in the main kitchen, helping to make lunch. Younger students were still studying basic subjects, like languages, math.
This time people had made different soups. Renne couldn't remember what he had made. That must have been cause of the glitch.
But it was time to start tasting!
[[Tasting time!]]So many soups! Chicken soup, that was made with recipe that was apparently "Best recipe in the world", smoked reindeer soup, salmon soups. Some of them were not so good, because there were still people who hadn't really cooked before.
Then Renne stopped at where Manta was with her soup. Nita was also there, talking to her.
*[["Ahem, what soup you made, Manta?"]]*Manta noticed Renne and smiled proudly.
*"I made some mushroom soup! Want to try?"*
Mushrooms... Renne disliked them. He wasn't sure was it because of flavour, texture or both? Renne sure didn't want to give it a taste.
But he then remembered, how Manta had given a try to the blue cheese tiramisu, even though she didn't like blue cheese.
It was time to repay kindness.
*[["Sure! Give me a clean spoon!"]]*Manta gave Renne a spoon. Moment of truth.
Renne stirred the soup a little. He really dreaded mushrooms.
Little bit soup on the spoon. There was no turning back now. He didn't want to disappoint.
*[["Gulp"]]*Mushroom soup was in Renne's mouth.
Mushrooms were slimy and disgusting as ever. But something was different. Taste was good! It was creamy, so that helped quite a bit.
It was difficult to chew the mushrooms, but Renne could swallow the spoonful. Felt like he chewed the mushroom soup for several minutes.
*"So? How did you like it?"* Usual cheery look had turned into worried look on Manta's face.
*[["It was good!"]]*Ranne couldn't believe it. Mushroom dish that was good!
Renne didn't realize that he had put his hand on Manta's shoulder.
*[["This was first time I actually liked a mushroom dish."]]**"Th-thank you! Happy that it tasted good for you!"*
Manta didn't even look at Renne when she said that. At the time Renne didn't pay attention, but now seeing this memory again... Could it be? Difficult to be sure.
Renne just kept thinking about other soups and went to taste them. And vision started to get blurry. He really wished he would've kept talking to her. But what was done, there's no changing it.
What was going to happen next?
*[["Huffing and puffing?"]]*And lots of squeaking.
Smell of wood. Curse words. Dorm master's voice teasing.
It was badminton.
Dorm master had reserved sports hall for once per week, so he could take students to play on evenings. At first Renne didn't feel like attending, but dorm master kept pestering. And of course Miko would join in too, so why not.
Renne was sitting on a bench, taking a break. Miko was next to him. But who were then playing?
*[["It's the dorm master and... Manta?!"]]*Renne had forgotten. Manta also used to come to play badminton. She was quite sporty, compared to Renne.
They stopped playing and Manta walked towards the benches Renne and Miko were sitting. She sure was breathing heavily and sweaty.
*"Whew... Either you want to go there and play against him? He is quite tough opponent."*
Renne had been sitting for quite awhile and was about to get up, but Miko was faster.
*"I'll go, you rest up Manta."* Miko said and ran to the playfield.
Renne waited for Manta's breath to settle, before asking
*[["How have you been doing?"]]**"Me? Oh, been busy, studies take so much free time. But these badminton evenings are nice distraction. How about you? You had your first practical period if I recall correctly?"*
This was the second semester of the first year! Renne had been on first practical period on hotel kitchen. That should explain, why time between last and this memory was so long.
*[["Yes, I was. It went well."]]**"Really? Tell me more about it! What did you do there?"*
Renne explained to her. He had done so much there! Even one customer had said that dessert that Renne made, was best she had ever eaten! Work community had been nice and helpful.
*"How nice! I'm going to have my first practical period this summer! Have to find a place though, closer to home."*
Manta seemed so happy.
*"What are you going to do next?"*
*[["I'll be here for the rest of the semester. I missed friends here so much. And well... These activities."]]*While they talked, they kept looking at each other shyly. Just social awkwardness. Or was it something more?
Miko then shouted from afar
*"Renne! Your turn! Can't keep going!"*
Renne gave a look and a smile to Manta, who responded to it. As Renne rose from the bench, vision started to get blurry again.
*[["Here we go again..."]]*Lots of talking. People around and wearing suits or other fancy outfits. Feeling of "Why I am here?"
It was ending ceremony of the school year and semester. Renne came to see, who were graduating. He had worked with some during the first year.
Renne had taken good place somewhere in the middle, close to the edges. Good place to be in peace and mind own your business, while ceremony was going on. They were boring.
Ceremony was held at the school cafeteria area. It had been arranged in such way, that whole space was available for seats.
*[["Could this start already?!"]]*Renne decided to read the program brochure. Not much, one or two sing-alongs, speeches, music performance and of course the diplomas. Renne's time at this school would last for two years, so he would graduate next year.
Suddenly, Renne heard a familiar voice coming from the left.
*"Hi, can I sit here?"*
*[["Is it..."]]*Renne looked towards the source of the voice.
It was Manta. Wearing a nice blue dress and light makeup. You could say she looked... beautiful.
*"Hello?"* Manta asked again.
Renne realized that he was gawking. Quickly shaking his head, he answered with great awkwardness.
*[["Sure! No problem! Have a seat!"]]*Manta sat down and looked at the programme brochure.
How did this happen? Renne looked around, to see did he see any familiar faces.
Farther back he could some classmates, locals. No one else. Renne started wondering, where the rest were.
*[["Didn't Miko or Nita come?"]]**"I asked Nita, but she had other things to do. Haven't saw Miko for a while. You were roommates, right? You must have seen him?"* Manta asked, while putting the brochure away.
*[["No, I have not. He must have been busy too. I mostly helped prepping the treats for this ceremony past few days."]]**"Oh really? Can't wait to try them out! You must tell what you worked on when this ceremony is over and try everything!"* Manta answered with enthusiasm.
That made Renne smile. He remembered that he hadn't seen classmates and Manta for awhile. Manta must have busy with the other degree she was studying.
*[["Ceremony is starting! Hope this won't be a drag. I'm a bit hungry."]]**"Oh, it is! I'm hungry too!"* Manta answered.
Ceremony was a drag to watch. Sing-alongs, either Renne or Manta didn't bother to sing. Speeches, as pointless as ever. Music performance was okay, although song wasn't that good. Handing out diplomas felt like an eternity!
Then it was time to hand out stipends. Mostly for those who had graduated. Renne was always jealous about those. No matter how active he was, he never got one. However, this time was a surprise.
*[["Oooh?"]]*It wasn't a surprise for Renne though. Manta got a stipend. Renne can't remember what the reason was though.
Manta was surprised also. Mostly she had been studying the other degree whole year. She stood up went to pick it up from the head principal of the school.
Manta returned to the seat, still amazed.
*"I don't feel like I deserve this!"* Manta kept saying.
*[["Sure you do. You've been wonderful to everyone. And you've been active on free time also. Be proud. And congratulations."]]**"Oh... Thank you."* Manta said with a slight blush on her face.
Rest of the ceremony went like a breeze. Wrapping it up took quite a while also. Some man in the suit just kept talking. Renne and Manta kept joking about it, trying to keep their voices down and avoid attention.
*[["Whew! It's over, let's eat!"]]**"YES! I'm starving!"* Manta said, almost rushing out.
They went to see the buffet. All sorts of salty and sweet treats! Cakes and cookies, small sandwiches. And some non-alcoholic drink. Possibilities were endless! Yet they took everything buffet had to offer.
Renne and Manta tried to look a good place to rest their overly filled plates and ended up going into the school lobby, which had lots of breathing room. Most of the guests and graduates were still at the cafeteria area.
Now that place was found, it was time for tasting!
*[["Which would be the best option to start?"]]**"I'll start with salty treats!"* Manta said, as she was putting the first treat in her mouth. Renne decided to follow the lead and started from the same treat.
*"SO GOOD! So juicy and I love the hint of vinegar. How about you?"*
*[["Can eat it, but not super good. On to the next one!"]]*They kept trying everything, until their plates were empty, and stomachs were aching. Small cocktails don't look much but eating too much of them is a bad idea.
Both were quiet and looking at each other from time to time. Renne sure was blushing. Something should be said, to break the silence.
Manta managed to say something first.
*"So… What are you planning to do on summer break?"*
*[["I'll rest. And maybe little odd jobs here and there. You?"]]**"I'll do my first practical period at gas the station back home. And our family will go for a road trip probably."* Manta answered.
Now that Renne was looking at this memory, he felt the same way as back then. Breathing difficult, blushing. Wanted to look at Manta's eyes but couldn't. It was now obvious, but the reality of feelings hit after that.
Why he couldn't say those words? That had been on his mind for so long. Wasn't he sure? Did he fear Manta wouldn't respond to those feelings? Maybe memory was playing tricks on him, maybe Manta didn't act like that?
*[["What happened?"]]*Memory was blurry. They may have talked something for awhile. But how the conversation ended, that Renne remembered.
*[["I have to go now. Have a nice summer and see you in August!"]]**"You too."*
Those were Manta's last words, before he would see her again on fall.
Renne walked to the car he had borrowed and drove home. Mind was boiling. So much anxiety. He couldn't remember the drive to home.
It was then he got home, the feeling really hit him.
He liked Manta. He had romantic feelings.
*[[...Hard to breath...]]*Renne's breathing got heavy and faster. Felt like he could suffocate at any moment. Everything was black around him. It was like he was in a void. He had to grab his chest. Heart was beating like crazy.
*[["Fresh air!"]]*Renne could shout those words and he started to lose conscious. It was starting to feel so peaceful.
Everything started to fade away, slowly. Eyes closing.
Until suddenly, he could hear weird sound, like someone was grabbing a lid of milk churn with great haste. Sudden surge of light penetrated through his eye lids.
Then he felt faint, but familiar voice shouting
*"RENNE! GET UP! ARE YOU OKAY?"*
*[["Huh..."]]*Renne slowly opened his eyes. He could breathe again, with slight difficulty.
Familiar figure appeared in his field of view. Facial features started appearing. It was doctor Muroma. Or rather... Veli.
*[["...What happened..."]]**"Oh great! You're okay! We'll get you out of there, so can get some rest. I'll tell you later."* Veli said with relief coming through his voice.
*"I'll give you some sedatives, so you can sleep well."* he said, as he reached something in his pocket.
It was a syringe.
*[["GAAAAAH!"]]*Renne was afraid of needles.
*"Hahhhah, just messing with you. That sure woke you up!"* Veli laughed
*"But seriously, we'll get you out of there, so you can lie down on the sofa for awhile. Nurse will bring you something warm to drink. You liked hot chocolate?"*
What a caring doctor Veli was. Renne couldn't help but to smile back.
*[["That was rough..."]]*Renne was lying on the couch. Hot chocolate did good and empty cup was still slightly steaming on the nearby table.
Nurse had helped him to the couch, that located at staff break room. It was apparently already early evening. Time in the Flashbacker machine had felt long, but not like several hours long.
Suddenly, break room door opened. Renne heard heavy footsteps and it was Veli, now wearing more casual clothing.
*[["Smart casual? You sure have changed!"]]**"I grew out of that phase."* Veli grinned and sat on the couch. Renne made room for had dropped his legs to Veli's lap.
*"Are okay? Asking as a friend, not as a doctor."*
*[["Yeah... What happened at the end?"]]*Veli cleared his throat.
*"Time to enter doctor mode!"* Veli cheered up.
*"You seemed to have very tough memory, that you regret so much. A bit too much. Your vitals dropped like crazy! If we had been slower, your mind would left have this existence!"*
*[["Really? Sure felt like it. Felt like everything I had suppressed came back to me. I wanted to leave."]]**"What was that memory that caused it? You want to tell me?"*
Veli was genuine with his words. Even though they hadn't interacted in years, he still cared.
*[["It was what happened on first year ending ceremony. With one girl..."]]**"First year... Ending ceremony?"* Veli was in his thoughts.
*"Aaah! You and Manta! I hung around with my classmates during that, but you seemed to get along well with Manta that day."*
Veli sure had good memory. He liked to observe what was happening.
*"Was it at the lobby. I remember. I could sense the tension from far away!"*
Tension? Renne wouldn't call it that, but okay.
*"You liked Manta?"*
*[["...Yes..."]]*
*[["Not sure..."]]**"I KNEW IT! It was so obvious! I think Manta liked you too!"*
Veli sure couldn't hide the joy. Apparently, he had thought this matter for years and finally getting the confirmation.
Renne felt like his heart was lighter now. He never talked about his crushes. But he remembered one friend from years ago had said "You're too obvious when you like someone"
*"So that has bothered you for years?"*
*[["When schools started again, I was excited to see her again. To finally confess to her. But when I asked how she was doing, she mentioned she had a boyfriend."]]**"Oh come on, it was so obvious that you liked her. I think she liked you too!"* Veli said and slapped Renne.
Renne didn't want to admit it, even though it was true. He had a friend from years ago, who had said to him "It is so obvious you like someone"
Maybe it was time to finally open up.
*[["When schools started again, I was excited to see her again. To finally confess to her. But when I asked how she was doing, she mentioned she had a boyfriend."]]**"Oh... So what happened then?"*
*[["I... Suppressed my feelings. I still loved her deep inside. But wanted to move on. I'm still moving on, haven't gotten over it."]]**"That explains it. You act the same whenever you develop feelings towards someone. But can't give in. Still hoping, you would see Manta again, to talk things through."*
He couldn't have said it better.
*[["So what should I do?"]]**"Contact her! You did add her as friend on social media years ago? I remember seeing her on your friend list."*
Veli was bit of a stalker, on top of being an observer!
*[["I think I did!"]]**"Contact her when you feel ready. But rest for a while, to gather your thoughts, that was rough experience."* and he tapped Renne's shoulder gently. Friendly touch, Renne had missed this.
*"Get up! I'll give you ride home. Of course, you need to tell me where you live!"*
Truly a friend! Renne had taken a taxi when he got to the hospital and it was already late.
*[["Let's go home!"]]*On the way home, Renne and Veli talked about, what they had been doing all these years.
After getting Veli had done some IT work after he had graduated. Then he had become interest in the depths of the human mind. Because he was a tech nerd, he got in a group of nerds, who helped to help design and build Flashbacker. And then he had studied medicine. So he was quite an expert on that field.
Veli had dropped Renne to his front door and they had exchanged contact information and talked every week.
[[Few weeks later]]Few weeks had passed since the operation. Renne minded his own business as usual. Work, home, work, home. Lots of rest.
One evening, Renne was on his computer, doing the usual things. Playing games, checking forums. But on this evening, he was checking social media.
He looked at right side bar, which showed friend list. Not many were online this late. However, one familiar name was showing green.
*[["Manta is online..."]]*Renne was feeling courageous this evening. He clicked Manta's picture on the side bar and a chat box opened.
She still looked beautiful. And her hair was longer now. Seeing her again brought smile on his face. Familiar feelings...
Renne decided to
[[Let it be]]
[[Write]]Renne closed the chat box, logged out, closed the computer. He went to bed.
Maybe Renne was chickening out, but he felt it was for the best to let it be. Shadow of Manta had been on his mind for years. He thought they could've been something, but it had been years. But because of her, he hadn't dared to develop crush on anyone.
He held hope, that they still could be something, if he just had contacted her earlier.
But it was time to move on.
Renne closed his eyes and hoped next day would go well.
[[The end]]Renne put his fingers on the keyboard and wrote.
*[["Hi! Do you remember me? It's been years."]]*<img style="width:100%;" src="https://i.imgur.com/LHcK4jH.jpg">
Thank you playing!Renne pressed sent the message and heart started beating like crazy. Would she notice? Would she ignore him? Block him?
Felt like Renne waited for minutes, when indicator appeared, that showed Manta was writing back.
It took awhile, but message then appeared on the screen.
*"Hi! I do remember you Renne! You sure haven't changed a bit, if your profile picture is up-to-date."*
*[["I look more or less the same now, that picture is few months old. You have grown longer hair! Suits you well!"]]**"Oh, thanks! I felt like doing it. But how you've been doing? You graduated from the school two years before I did."*
*[["Well..."]]*Renne and Manta talked about what they had been doing over the years. It almost felt like they had been there, physically, talking to each other. Like all those years ago.
Then Manta asked
*"Do you live alone or with someone now?"*
*[["Alone."]]**"Oh... There's never such thing as being late!"*
Could this be the moment?
*[["You know... I liked you back then."]]*
*[["Yep, never give up!"]]*It took Manta quite a while to answer.
*"Really?"*
*[["I did."]]**"You know, my aunt found a love of her love when she was 50! They are such a cute couple!"*
Renne hoped he would find someone, but not that late!
*[["Heh, I hope I find someone, but hope I'm younger when that happens!"]]*Silence again.
After few minutes, message appeared.
*"Do you have a webcam?"*
*[["You want to make a video call? Why?"]]**"Yes. Do you have one?"*
*[["Let me plug it in. Wait a little."]]*Renne picked the webcam on his table, put it on top of his monitor and plugged it into computer. Heart was pumping like crazy again.
*[["I'm ready."]]*And so message was now saying, that Manta was calling. Renne almost wanted to decline to the call, but bravery made him push accept.
After short connecting period, Manta appeared on the screen.
*[["... H-hi!"]]*Renne felt like he was blushing again. She truly was still beautiful!
*"Hi..."*
She sounded exactly the same as he remembered!
*"I think I did too..."*
Now it was now or never.
*[["Do you think we could be something? Still?"]]*
*[["Yeah. But it has been years and we have moved on."]]*Manta was thinking. She also had difficulties expressing her thoughts.
Eventually
*"I'm now remembering everything we went through. I sure feel, if had been honest to each other, we could've been. That first year ending ceremony sure was something"*
She let out slight smile.
*[["Yeah... I was thinking about it the other day. Felt like I was so close to saying those important words, but I just ran away."]]**"Yeah. Fate had other plans. We were good friends at least, right?"*
Good that she agreed. Conversation would've turned awkward, if he had said otherwise.
*[["We can still be friends at least?"]]*Manta started laughing.
*"It sure was! When you left, I was about to run after you! But then few friends came there and I couldn't.*
Everything was close to happening!
*[["I think fate decided to chose to things be this way."]]*
*[["So could we still be?"]]**"I think so too."*
What a gentle smile. Renne had missed that.
*"But we can still be good friends? If you ever end up here where I live, we can meet up! Do you still cook food?"*
It was better this way.
*[["I do! Didn't pursue the career, but it's still a nice hobby!"]]*Silence.
*"No. It has been too long. I have moved on. I'm hoping you have too."*
*[["Yes... But I still think about you from time to time."]]**"Same here!"*
That glimmer...
*"Was nice talking to you! I have to go now! Early wake up! Let's stay in touch!"*
*[["Good night Manta! Talk to you again!"]]**"Good night Renne!"*
Video call ended.
Renne logged off, turned off the computer and went to bed.
*[["Whew..."]]*It was better this way. Time had passed and they had met new people. They lived in different cities.
It felt like stone had dropped off the chest. Like a lock had opened.
Free from the curse! Renne felt like he could live again!
But it was time to go to sleep. It felt easier now. Renne looked forward to meeting Manta again. As a friend. Wonder what they could cook together?
[[The end]]*"I do too."*
Manta smiled gently.
*"I remember the feelings I had. I've meant to ask you from quite some time, how are you doing. I never could, but thank you. This means so much to be"*
*[["It means for me too."]]**"But we can still be friends! If you ever end up visiting where I live, we can meet up! Do you still cook food?"*
*"[["I do! Didn't pursue the career, but it's still a nice hobby!"]]**"We sure can! If you ever come here where I live, we can meet up! Cook something together? You still cook food?"*
Friends... There's never enough of them.
*[["I sure do! I like to try out traditional foods, so many options still left!"]]**"Haha! I sure we can cross something off the list!"* she said with a laugh.
Manta's laugh... That was sure something.
*"Anyways, I have to go! Early wake up!"*
*[["Same here. Good night Manta."]]**"Good night Renne!"* and she disappeared from the screen.
Talking to her felt good. But it was getting late. So Renne turned off the computer and went to bed.
*[["I'm free!"]]*Renne almost jumped to the bed from joy.
He was feeling so light! No more feeling of pressure in the head! He could sleep again in peace!
As Renne closed his eyes, he kept thinking. What he and Manta could cook, when they eventually met again?
[[The end]]Manta burst into laughter.
*"HAAHAHAHA!"*
*"You're a charming person, I'm sure you find someone soon enough!"*
Renne felt no one had complimented that directly.
*[["Thanks, you're charming too."]]**"Oh my! Thank you!"*
What else could be said? Felt like they had rekindled their friendship.
*[["If we ever meet again in person, we should cook something!"]]**"We should! I still love cooking, even though I only worked on cooking industry for a year after graduation."*
Manta just kept smiling.
*"Anyways! I have to get going! Early wake up! Talk to you later!"*
*[["Talk to your later. Good night Manta."]]**"Good night Renne."* and she disappeared from the screen.
Renne closed the computer and went to bed slowly.
*[["What just happened?"]]*Renne had complimented her and nothing awkward happened? In his mind, that always ended up horrible.
But no.
Renne felt like his mind was clear again. Like there was no greyness polluting his thoughts. He could finally allow himself fall in love with people other than Manta.
She was a good friend. And that was enough for him. Renne was looking forward to seeing her again in person.
As Renne was closing his eyes, one question remained. What they would cook, when they met someday?
[[The end]]*"Well I sure did! I'm Mr. Muroma, specializing in mental problems!"*
Muroma. That sounded so familiar. Now that Renne looked at the doctor more closely, he looked familiar. It didn't hurt to ask.
*[["You don't happen to be Veli Muroma?"]]*