It's been a long while since you've looked at the clock. The sun had been shining on it almost perfectly last you did. That light is long gone now, your room stark cold and shrouded. The clock burns brightly, giving a not-so-inviting red glow upon the wall.
8:02 P.M.
You haven't felt the motivation to do much today than to tarry at your phone. You bed has proven too comforting. You ponder the possibility of [[getting up|Get Up]], though [[staying in bed|Stay in bed]] seems much more appealing.
You lift yourself courageously out of your bed. Or, at least, on to your ass. You leg touches the brisk air brough by your fan. Your skin freezes in just the spot until you slide out your other leg. Now both of your legs are frozen. Great.
Now you've lifted yourself out of bed for real this time. You stretch your back and rub your mentally exhausted face. You stare longingly at your computer, hoping it can provide a better escape. Maybe it's time to [[get to work|Get to work]] on that thing you've been putting off.
You rustle about in your bed, your body using what little nervous energy it has to keep you dreadfully awake. Tonight's gonna be a little bit harder.
You breathe deeply, begging for relief.
In.
Out.
In.
Out.
In.
Out...side ?
[[What's going on ?|Rise of the storm]]
The machine hums to life as you prod its instruments. After logging in, you bumble around your desktop trying to remember what it was you came here for.
You somehow stumble to the project as intended, and it's only then it dawns on you this is what you wanted.
But why ? It's a piece of shit, anyway. You're not making any progress and at its current state you feel it dragging on and being pointless.
[[But you always fall in to this cycle|Rise of the storm]].
You guess to lie in bed for the rest of the night until your energy is uplifted. Rolling on to your back, you stare at the faint lights brushing across your ceiling. Your fan blows as gently as it can with the clicking noise it makes. It seems it's a bit loose on its hinges.
You turn the fan off and roll to the other side of yourself. Maybe the night will envelope you if you try to take out all the noise.
[[it doesn't seem to work, though|Rustle]]
You look out the window to see rain droplets slapping against the glass. You didn't even notice they were there. Lightning flashes sharply, a purple strike across the cloudscape catching your attention. Now magenta. Now Orange. It cycles between these every so often. The bursts have you ponder. In the end, you're [[not sure how to|Depress]][[ feel about it|Uplift]]
After a few moments, you just can't seem to care. The rain has never been kind to you. Everyone always talks about how great they are and how it's "cuddle weather." But you feel abandoned. Your mood tanks. You just don't care. Nothing is going to get done. It's time for bed.
Maybe,
maybe if you're lucky,
[[Maybe tomorrow will be better|I Love the Rain]].
You close your eyes and listen, the rain taking you away. Your mind washes over and kisses goodnight. The low rumbling of the storm comforts and gives a warm feeling. Something to contrast with the cold of the sky.
You feel love. You feel peace. You feel now it's time for bed.
Maybe,
maybe if you're lucky,
[[Maybe tomorrow will be better|I Love the Rain]].
It always is. Tomorrow is always better.
Every day you wake up is a better day. One day more you've made it so far.
Maybe you need a break from your projects. Maybe you just need to keep trudging through. Maybe you need a little help. Maybe it needs to be something new.
No matter the case, you are loved. Always have you been, by strangers and family no matter whereof. Maybe today just isn't your day. Maybe you do need the rest. Maybe you do need the pick-me-up.
No matter how you've gone through this story, there's one thing concrete:
I love you. That statement's complete.
I hope you can find the peace I do
and understand why
[[I Love the Rain|Credits]].
This is my first time making a "twine" thing. I've done strings of HTML pages for testing some dialogue scripts but putting it all in to one page is much better, albeit very cluttered and unnecessarily huge. Have you seen all these goddamn keyframes ? Shit.
Anyway, I did this because someone special was like "Hey, this really cool jam idea didn't get any submissions" and seeing what it was it kinda bummed me out !! So sorry. Maybe the world just wasn't ready.
Regardless, my words of love are true. I do love you. Thank you for reading my quick little bit about depression/hope. Always stay strong. Do only what you are able and only push yourself when you can spare the energy.
Please stay safe. Much love.
~hy