In Auctorem Credimus

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$title

<<if $surname != "none">> ''Agent $surname'' Level $age <<print $race.toUpperFirst()>> Biblio-Anthropologist Health: <progress @value="$health" max="100">$health</progress> <</if>>

character page

<<link "<< Back <<">><<if tags().includes("game-info")>><<goto $return>><<else>><<run Engine.backward()>><</if>><</link>> <<link "Credits" "Credits">><</link>>

<<script>> var passages = document.getElementById("passages"); passages.scrollTop = 0; <</script>>

<<set $title to "In Auctorem Credimus">> <<set $chapter to "">> <<set $author to "Franzinyte">> <<set $music to "none">> <<set $health to 100>> <<set $age to 22>> <<set $race to "human">> <<set $name to "none">> <<set $nn to "none">> <<set $surname to "none">> <<set $gender to 1>>  <<set $he to "he">> <<set $his to "his">> <<set $him to "him">> <<set $hes to "he's">> <<set $plural to false>> <<set $skin to "">> <<set $ecolor to "">> <<set $hcolor to "">> <<set $htype to "">> <<set $hstyle to "">> <<set $height to 3>> <<set $relheight to 2>> <<set $body to 0>> <<set $bodyopinion to 2>> <<set $genre to 1>> <<set $setting to "">> <<set $flight to false>> <<set $ranged to false>> <<set $magic to false>> <<set $emotional to false>> <<set $glasses to false>> <<set $hearingaids to false>> <<set $mc to "none">> <<set $mcnn to "none">> <<set $mche to "they">> <<set $mcHe to "They">> <<set $mchis to "their">> <<set $mcHis to "Their">> <<set $mchim to "them">> <<set $mcHim to "Them">> <<set $mches to "they're">> <<set $mcHes to "They're">> <<set $mcplural to true>>  <<cacheaudio "quiet" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/2y1a59xhctu0p2f/quiettime_f.ogg?raw=1">>

* Sugarcube Template by <a href="https://nyehilism.itch.io/" target="_blank">nyehilism</a> * Banner assets <a href="https://www.canva.com/" target="_blank">Canva</a> * Fonts <a href="https://fonts.google.com/" target="_blank">Google fonts</a> !!MUSIC (Quiet Time, Morning Magic, Gentle Lullaby, The Unsolved Murder, Devils Squid Game, Trusted Advertising, Forest Ventures, Painful Memories, Childhood Nostalgia, Dark Fog, Winters Wish, Sentimental Dialogue, Dark Fog, Simplicity, The Soft Lullaby, Touch of Love) Music used from https://www.fesliyanstudios.com Almost New by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/3353-almost-new License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license On My Way Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ Local Forecast - Slower by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/3988-local-forecast---slower License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Music for Manatees by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4102-music-for-manatees License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Pop Goes the Weasel by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4230-pop-goes-the-weasel License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Darkling by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/3616-darkling License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Clash Defiant by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/3510-clash-defiant License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Stay The Course by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/5048-stay-the-course License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license

Codex

ORANGE: Game info - character page, codex, credits. Populate these with what you like. GREEN: UI & game set-up elements. These can be edited to suit your needs. RED: Code. Everything in these passages should be labelled; things might break if you mess with them.

$chapter

<style> #ui-bar {display:none;} #passages {width:100vw;margin:0;background-image:var(--banner-top),var(--banner-bottom);background-repeat:no-repeat;background-size:50%;background-position:top center, bottom center;overflow:hidden;scrollbar-width:none;font-family:var(--header-font);transition:0s;padding:0;} ::-webkit-scrollbar {width:0px;} .passage {text-align:center;transition:0s;} #passages a:before {content: none;} #story {margin-left:0;} h1 {text-align:center;margin-top:25vh;} @media screen and (max-width: 800px) {#story {margin:0;}} </style> <h1>In Auctorem Credimus</h1> <<if Save.autosave.ok() and Save.autosave.has()>><<link "Resume Game">><<script>>Save.autosave.load()<</script>><</link>> | <</if>><<link "New Game" "Startup">><</link>> | <<link "Load Game">><<run UI.saves()>><</link>> | <<link "Settings">><<run UI.settings()>><</link>>

<div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px"><img src="https://img.itch.zone/aW1nLzc5ODY1MTcuZ2lm/original/feq1hZ.gif"></div> //In Auctorem Credimus// is a metafictional sci-fantasy adventure where you play as the main character's love interest, who takes over the MC's role after the story has ended. This is my entry for the ''@interact-if'' ranked game jam! The jam's theme is "cliffhanger", so the game will end on one, but the game is written with a longer follow-up story in mind! The game is complete, but has several choices and features that didn't make the cut. Please note that due to the jam restrictions, there won't be any further content updates for a while except bug fixes. ---- * [[Let's begin!|audio]] * [[Read Content Warnings|warnings]] * [[Check Update Log|devlog]]

<<cacheaudio "magic" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/p7tmsbqak7q15js/morningmagic_f.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set $music to "quiet">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</if>><<set $chapter to "Book 1, Epilogue">><<type 60ms>> !!"And they lived happily ever after" might be the biggest cliffhanger of all.<</type>> <<timed 6s t8n>>I didn't know it at the time, but the day after our story ended, I expected yet another plot twist. That there's a bigger villain, that it was a dream all along. I kept waiting, and waiting. Maybe it's a little messed up, but there's a little part of me, in the back of my head, in the bottom of my heart, hoping that our adventure wasn't over yet. But I guess I should be grateful my story was finished in the first place. After all, many stories don't make it out of development purgatory, or worse, forgotten in an old notebook in the attic, or left unopened at the bottom of the documents folder. Oh, right, sorry. I'm getting a little ahead of myself here, aren't I? <<linkreplace "I guess I should re-introduce myself…">>Call me… <<textbox "$name" "Ishmael" autofocus>> <<button "Continue" "e2">><</button>> <</linkreplace>><</timed>>

<h1>⚠️ Content Warnings:</h1> While In Auctorem Credimus is generally light-hearted, please note that the story does explore some serious and mature themes, including: • Fantasy violence (nothing graphic) • Discussions regarding death, existential crisis, and morality • Brainwashing and memory wiping • Disappearance of family members • Mild language (censored) • Natural disasters (earthquakes, volcano, tsunami) • Light horror elements ---- * [[Let's begin!|audio]]

Call me $name. Some years ago—never mind how long precisely—having defeated the big villain, and with no character arcs left to complete, I thought I would explore a little and see the rest of the world. It is a way I have of driving off my growing post-plot existential crisis. Whenever I find myself wondering if I'll have another adventure, or if I'll find myself in another conflict, and especially whether the villains will return—I would shout into the night sky… "Hey author! * <<link "...Are we ever going to have a sequel?\"" "e3">><<set $authorquestion to "Are we ever going to have a sequel?">><</link>> * <<link "...Do you still remember our story?\"" "e3">><<set $authorquestion to "Do you still remember our story?">><</link>> * <<link "...Have you forgotten about me?\"" "e3">><<set $authorquestion to "Have you forgotten about me?">><</link>> * <<link "...Did you ever care about me? Us?\"" "e3">><<set $authorquestion to "Did you ever care about me? Us?">><</link>> * <<link "...Are you just going to leave us in a cliffhanger?\"" "e3">><<set $authorquestion to "Are you just going to leave us in a cliffhanger?">><</link>>

The chuckle I heard after is something I'll never forget. I froze for a moment, until I realized that the main character of my story was watching me from behind. "I was wondering that too," my... * <<link "...wife said." "e4">><<set $mcrelation to "wife">><<set $mche to "she">><<set $ex to false>><</link>> * <<link "...husband said." "e4">><<set $mcrelation to "husband">><<set $mche to "he">><<set $ex to false>><</link>> * <<link "...spouse said." "e4">><<set $mcrelation to "spouse">><<set $mche to "they">><<set $ex to false>><</link>> * <<link "...ex-wife said." "e4">><<set $mcrelation to "ex-wife">><<set $mche to "she">><<set $ex to true>><</link>> * <<link "...ex-husband said." "e4">><<set $mcrelation to "ex-husband">><<set $mche to "he">><<set $ex to true>><</link>> * <<link "...ex-spouse said." "e4">><<set $mcrelation to "ex-spouse">><<set $mche to "they">><<set $ex to true>><</link>>

I still remember the time when we first met. We bumped into each other while running away from the villains, like we were in a cheesy rom-com, but you already know that. The rest, as they say, was backstory. <<if $ex is false>> ---- * <<link "I hate how cliché our meeting was, but you can't deny the chemistry between us the moment our eyes met." "e5">><</link>> * <<link "Who cares if it was cliché? Our meeting was just like how I always imagined it." "e5">><</link>> * <<link "It was more of a slow burn for us, but I'm glad the author didn't move it too quickly." "e5">><</link>> * <<link "It was more of a slow burn for us, but I was kinda sick of the 'Will we, or won't we?' by the end." "e5">><</link>> * <<link "It has been a rough journey for us, but I guess we're still together despite everything." "e5">><</link>> <<else>> ---- * <<link "It was love at first sight, but unfortunately 'living happily ever after' meant something else for us." "e5">><</link>> * <<link "The fact that it was love at first sight meant we were never meant to be in the first place." "e5">><</link>> * <<link "We tried to make it work, but our author should've known we were incompatible from the start." "e5">><</link>> * <<link "It was the inevitable romance subplot. Of course it was also inevitable that our relationship—built with infatuation and high tensions—would crumble." "e5">><</link>> <</if>> <<if $mche == "he">> <<set $mcHe to "He">> <<set $mchis to "his">> <<set $mcHis to "His">> <<set $mchim to "him">> <<set $mcHim to "Him">> <<set $mches to "he's">> <<set $mcHes to "He's">> <<set $mchimself to "himself">> <<set $mcplural to false>> <<elseif $mche == "she">> <<set $mcHe to "She">> <<set $mchis to "her">> <<set $mcHis to "Her">> <<set $mchim to "her">> <<set $mcHim to "Her">> <<set $mches to "she's">> <<set $mcHes to "She's">> <<set $mchimself to "herself">> <<set $mcplural to false>> <<elseif $mche == "they">> <<set $mcHe to "They">> <<set $mchis to "their">> <<set $mcHis to "Their">> <<set $mchim to "them">> <<set $mcHim to "Them">> <<set $mches to "they're">> <<set $mcHes to "They're">> <<set $mchimself to "themselves">> <<set $mcplural to true>> <</if>>

<<if $ex is true>> Sure, we were the canon couple, but we quickly realized post-plot that our chemistry was just on-screen. We had a mutual feeling that our author didn't write our relationship very well. Or at least, it's something we're not happy with. We had an amicable break-up after the story. We had no hard feelings for each other—it would've been a shame if that got in the way of our friendship. Our relationship may not have worked, but I'm not afraid to admit that the two of us have amazing chemistry on the battlefield. <<else>> And our chemistry wasn't just romantic—we're also an amazing couple on the battlefield. <</if>> We met a lot of new friends, made some questionable decisions, and had our fair share of betrayals that we should've seen coming, but in the end, we were able to… * <<link "…defeat and seal back the Dark Lord terrorizing our magical kingdom into where he belongs." "e6">><<set $genre to 1>><</link>> * <<link "…take back the Enchanted Forest from the Unseelie Court." "e6">><<set $genre to 2>><</link>> * <<link "…destroy the alien mothership conquering our galaxy." "e6">><<set $genre to 3>><</link>> * <<link "…prevent an all-out war between the gods and goddesses of the celestial realm." "e6">><<set $genre to 4>><</link>> * <<link "…ward off the supernaturals and lift the curse from our haunted village." "e6">><<set $genre to 5>><</link>> * <<link "…uncover the mystery behind the kidnappings in our town." "e6">><<set $genre to 6>><</link>> * <<link "…defeat the infamous League of Supervillains and stop their superweapon." "e6">><<set $genre to 7>><</link>> * <<link "…collect MacGuffin's lost artifacts in the Cursed Catacombs and foil the evil plans of ACME Corp." "e6">><<set $genre to 8>><</link>>

"I'm glad I'm not the only one," I replied back. "I was a little worried that you'd think I'm…" "What?" $mche said. "The moment I fell in love with you, I knew we were both crazy." $mche sat beside me, intertwined $mchis fingers with mine, and gazed at the starry night sky above. "No matter what happens, I promise… * …we'll have more adventures together." * …I'll be always here fighting beside you." * …no villains will ever keep us apart." * <<linkreplace "It doesn't matter. That was five years ago.">><<type 60ms>>Five years ago, when our story ended happily ever after…<</type>><<timed 4s>> ---- * <<link "And honestly, I couldn't see it ending any other way." "e7">><</link>> * <<link "I would've preferred it to be a little more bittersweet, but who am I to complain?" "e7">><</link>> * <<link "It was too predictable, if you ask me. It's like we never had any stakes at all." "e7">><</link>> <</timed>> <</linkreplace>>

<<cacheaudio "gentle" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/vn5q1odikulc5zu/gentlelullaby_f.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "magic">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> <<type 20ms>>"You've been daydreaming again, $name."<</type>> <<timed 3s t8n>>The voice of my $mcrelation tugs me back to the present. It wasn't a lie, though. Ever since our story ended, there wasn't a day my internal monologue stopped thinking about it. When you have no more villains to worry about, it's the only thing that'll keep you up at night. I turn back and call $mchis name. ---- * <<link "\"Alex?\"" "e8">><<set $mc to "Alex">><</link>> * <<link "\"Andy?\"" "e8">><<set $mc to "Andy">><</link>> * <<link "\"Ashley?\"" "e8">><<set $mc to "Ashley">><</link>> * <<link "$mcHis name is a little more unique than that..." "namespouse">><</link>> <</timed>>

My $mcrelation's name is... <<textbox "$mc" "" autofocus>> <<button "Continue" "e8">><</button>>

$mcHe <<if $mcplural == true>>greet<<else>>greets<</if>> me with a smile, and sets down the glasses of chocolate and strawberry milk $mches holding onto my bedside table. And with a smile like that, I can't deny that $mche <<if $mcplural == true>>look<<else>>looks<</if>> as alluring as ever, <<cycle "$agerange">> <<option "[and I'm sure $mche'll still be even past our twenties.]" 20>> <<option "[even in our thirties.]" 30>> <<option "[even in our early forties.]" 40>> <</cycle>> "Still wondering if we'll ever have a sequel?" ---- * <<link "I nod and give $mchim a wistful smile." "e9">><</link>> * <<link "\"Aren't you?\" I chuckle and give $mchim a nudge." "e9">><</link>> <<type 20ms>>!!!!Tip! Any text enclosed in [square brackets] can be changed by clicking on it.<</type>>

$mcHe <<if $mcplural == true>>lean<<else>>leans<</if>> on the doorframe. "Personally, I'd rather have a movie adaptation. I know they're usually not very good, but sequels don't exactly have the best reputation either. At least in the movie I know we'll look good and… y'know, potentially be able to fix all those dumb decisions we made." ---- * <<link "\"You know, I've always imagined us being in the big screen.\"" "e10">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Well, why not both?\"" "e10">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Sure. I'd prefer if it was animated though.\"" "e10">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> * <<link "\"You're just saying that because you're the main character.\"" "e10">><<set $text to 4>><</link>> * <<link "\"Honestly, I'm fine with either. I'll take anything at this point.\"" "e10">><<set $text to 5>><</link>> * <<link "\"I don't know. I'd rather have a new story, even if it's not very good.\"" "e10">><<set $text to 6>><</link>> * <<link "\"And relive all those awkward and... unpleasant scenes? No thanks.\"" "e10">><<set $text to 7>><</link>> * <<link "\"I wouldn't mind. As long as we also get a TV mini-series.\"" "e10">><<set $text to 8>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>> "I mean, I'd be surprised if you haven't." <<elseif $text == 2>> "Hey, let's not get too excited and disappoint ourselves later." <<elseif $text == 3>> "Complete with a musical?" <<elseif $text == 4>> "Hey, it's a lot of pressure. You have it much easier." <<elseif $text == 5>> "Hey, be careful what you wish for. You never know what people in the internet are thinking about us." <<elseif $text == 6>> "Even fanfiction?" "As long as it's good, I wouldn't mind. It might even be better." <<elseif $text == 7>> "That's one of the things I was hoping to change." <<else>> "Oh, I'd be down for that." <</if>> $mcHe <<if $mcplural == true>>glance <<else>> glances <</if>>at a picture frame on the wall, the one we took just before our story ended. "But…" And then a loud squeal followed by a thump interrupts our fourth wall breaking. $mcHe <<if $mcplural == true>>sigh and straighten <<else>> sighs and straightens <</if>> $mchimself up. "Never mind. Come on, you can finish daydreaming and packing later. The twins are waiting for you." ---- * <<link "\"Why didn't you say so?\" Nothing beats the feeling of being a parent." "e11">><<set $likeskids to true>><</link>> * <<link "\"Here we go again...\" As a parent, I can safely say that they are simultaneously both the best and the worst things in the world." "e11">><<set $likeskids to true>><</link>> * <<link "I sigh. They're... not so bad, all things considered, but this is clearly the author's choice, not mine. Thankfully the epilogue was vague enough that we had the freedom of choosing of how we had our children." "e11">><<set $likeskids to false>><</link>>

I grab the glass of <<cycle "$milk">> <<option "[chocolate milk]">> <<option "[strawberry milk]">> <</cycle>>, and follow $mchim into our childrens' bedroom. Our son and daughter will be turning five soon. They're not the most obedient children ever, but if there's something that'll always make them behave, whether they're playing, fighting, or play-fighting… it's listening to our story. Although we usually leave out the part about how they became a part of our family. ---- * <<link "We were already expecting during the epilogue." "e12">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "We adopted them from the CPO, also known as the Children Protagonists Orphanage." "e12">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "We had a surrogate. We were lucky to find someone willing, but that may be because $mc is pretty much the chosen one." "e12">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> * <<link "They were delivered to us by storks. We don't have any idea where the storks actually get the babies, but we figured it's best not to know." "e12">><<set $text to 4>><</link>> * <<link "Let's just say, there was some magic and wizardry involved. Or some sufficiently advanced technology, I'm not really sure." "e12">><<set $text to 5>><</link>> * <<link "You know, we'd need a whole spin-off story to tell how it really happened. " "e12">><<set $text to 6>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>We just didn't expect that there'd be two of them. I suppose one of them is technically an accident, but it was a <<if $likeskids == true>>happy accident indeed<<else>>but I wouldn't quite call it a happy one<</if>>.<<elseif $text == 2>>We haven't told them yet, but considering it's the orphans that get into the most fun adventures, hopefully it wouldn't cause too much heartbreak.<</if>> We stop in front of the door and knock as we call out for them, their names displayed in front with colorful cut-out letters. Our son's name is... <<radiobutton "$boy" "Mason" checked>> Mason <<radiobutton "$boy" "Luke" autocheck>> Luke <<radiobutton "$boy" "Sebastian" autocheck>> Sebastian <<radiobutton "$boy" "Conner" autocheck>> Conner <<radiobutton "$boy" "none" autocheck>> A little more unique... And our daughter's name is... <<radiobutton "$girl" "Mabel" checked>> Mabel <<radiobutton "$girl" "Leia" autocheck>> Leia <<radiobutton "$girl" "Viola" autocheck>> Viola <<radiobutton "$girl" "Alexandra" autocheck>> Alexandra <<radiobutton "$girl" "none" autocheck>> A little more unique... <<button "Continue" "alliterative">><</button>>

<<if $boy == "none">> Our son's name is... <<textbox "$boy" "" autofocus>> <</if>> <<if $girl == "none">> Our daughter's name is... <<textbox "$girl" "">> <</if>> <<button "Continue" "alliterative">><</button>>

<<if $boy == "none" || $girl == "none">><<goto childrenname>><<else>><<if $boy.first() == $girl.first()>><<set $text to "We wanted them to be alliterative.">><<else>><<set $text to "We tried not to make them alliterative.">><</if>>Their names are $boy and $girl. ---- * <<link "$text" "e13">><<set $boynn to $boy>><<set $girlnn to $girl>><</link>> * <<link "Of course, they prefer being called by their nicknames..." "nicknames">><</link>> <</if>>

$boy's nickname is... <<textbox "$boynn" "" autofocus>> $girl's nickname is... <<textbox "$girlnn" "">> <<button "Continue" "e13">><</button>>

<<if $likeskids is false>>I wasn't fond of them at first. But they did grow on me eventually, if 'eventually' meant not really.<</if>> <<if $ex is true>>They still don't fully understand why we broke up, but as if it wasn't hard to explain already, we also need to be careful about breaking the fourth wall around. I just hope they won't blame themselves when they finally understand.<</if>>And, well, this is the part where I say, "They grow up so fast." But if there's one thing I can say, when my story first started, I never thought I'd become a proud… * <<link "...Mother." "e14">><<set $gender to 2>><</link>> * <<link "...Father." "e14">><<set $gender to 1>><</link>> * <<link "...Parent." "e14">><<set $gender to 3>><</link>> * <<link "...Mother, although it's a little more complicated than that." "e14">><<set $gender to 2>><</link>> * <<link "...Father, although it's a little more complicated than that." "e14">><<set $gender to 1>><</link>> * <<link "...Parent, although it's a little more complicated than that." "e14">><<set $gender to 3>><</link>>

$boy and $girl's... <<if $gender == 1>> * <<link "...Daddy, more specifically." "e15">><<set $parent to "Daddy">><</link>> * <<link "...Dad, more specifically." "e15">><<set $parent to "Dad">><</link>> * <<link "...Papa, more specifically." "e15">><<set $parent to "Papa">><</link>> * <<link "Hmm, none of those sound right to me..." "parenttype">><<set $parent to "none">><</link>> <<set $he to "he">> <<set $He to "He">> <<set $his to "his">> <<set $His to "His">> <<set $him to "him">> <<set $Him to "Him">> <<set $hes to "he's">> <<set $Hes to "He's">> <<set $himself to "himself">> <<set $plural to false>> <<elseif $gender == 2>> * <<link "...Mommy, more specifically." "e15">><<set $parent to "Mommy">><</link>> * <<link "...Mom, more specifically." "e15">><<set $parent to "Mom">><</link>> * <<link "...Mama, more specifically." "e15">><<set $parent to "Mama">><</link>> * <<link "Hmm, none of those sound right to me..." "parenttype">><<set $parent to "none">><</link>> <<set $he to "she">> <<set $He to "She">> <<set $his to "her">> <<set $His to "Her">> <<set $him to "her">> <<set $Him to "Her">> <<set $hes to "she's">> <<set $Hes to "She's">> <<set $himself to "herself">> <<set $plural to false>> <<else>> * <<link "...Ren, more specifically." "e15">><<set $parent to "Ren">><</link>> * <<link "...Zaza, more specifically." "e15">><<set $parent to "Zaza">><</link>> * <<link "...Moddy, more specifically." "e15">><<set $parent to "Moddy">><</link>> * <<link "Hmm, none of those sound right to me..." "parenttype">><<set $parent to "none">><</link>> <<set $he to "they">> <<set $He to "They">> <<set $his to "their">> <<set $His to "Their">> <<set $him to "them">> <<set $Him to "Them">> <<set $hes to "they're">> <<set $Hes to "They're">> <<set $himself to "themselves">> <<set $plural to true>> <</if>>

As for $mc, they call $mchim… <<if $mche == "he">> * <<link "...Daddy." "e16">><<set $mcparent to "Daddy">><</link>> * <<link "...Dad." "e16">><<set $mcparent to "Dad">><</link>> * <<link "...Papa." "e16">><<set $mcparent to "Papa">><</link>> * <<link "Something else..." "mcparenttype">><<set $mcparent to "none">><</link>> <<elseif $mche == "she">> * <<link "...Mommy." "e16">><<set $mcparent to "Mommy">><</link>> * <<link "...Mom." "e16">><<set $mcparent to "Mom">><</link>> * <<link "...Mama." "e16">><<set $mcparent to "Mama">><</link>> * <<link "Something else..." "mcparenttype">><<set $mcparent to "none">><</link>> <<else>> * <<link "...Ren." "e16">><<set $mcparent to "Ren">><</link>> * <<link "...Zaza." "e16">><<set $mcparent to "Zaza">><</link>> * <<link "...Moddy." "e16">><<set $mcparent to "Moddy">><</link>> * <<link "Something else..." "mcparenttype">><<set $mcparent to "none">><</link>> <</if>>

$boynn and $girlnn call me... <<textbox "$parent" "" autofocus>> <<button "Continue" "e15">><</button>>

$boynn and $girlnn call $mc their... <<textbox "$mcparent" "" autofocus>> <<button "Continue" "e16">><</button>>

I shake off the infodumpy monologue from my head, just in time for the door to open. Out comes two gremlins, jumping onto both of us with a tackle hug with their <<cycle "$twinbody">> <<option "[chubby arms]." "chubby">> <<option "[slender arms]." "slender">> <</cycle>> "$mcparent!" "$parent!" ---- * <<link "\"What did I say? Be careful.\"" "e17">><</link>> * <<link "I laugh and chuckle as I try to return the hugs without spilling the milk." "e17">><</link>> * <<link "I kiss them on their cheeks." "e17">><</link>> * <<link "I put the milk down and pick them up one by one." "e17">><</link>> * <<link "I put the milk down and pick up both of them." "e17">><</link>> * <<link "I take a step back and remind them that I'm not very fond of hugs." "e17">><</link>>

And with their daily evening hug satisfied, they wasted no time chugging their favorite bedtime beverage. "Careful, you two," I say, stroking their heads. "You don't have to drink it all in one go." "But then $boynn will just drink it," $girl says after finishing her glass. "Then maybe you shouldn't bring it all in one go, $parent," $boy quips. I chuckle as I sit on their bed, and pull them closer together. "Of course." $mc stands in front of the six-story bookshelf standing guard in front of their bed. "Now who's ready for a bedtime story?" "Can we hear $mcparent and $parent's story again? Pwease?" "Yup, it's long time since you last read us..." <<button "Continue" "e18">><</button>>

$mc and I exchange looks. If there's any story I wouldn't be tired of telling over and over, it would be…<<cycle "$mystory">> <<option "[our story].">> <<option "[my story]." >> <</cycle>> And so, the four of us settled on the bed, eager to relive the story once more. The night is cold, the evening is dark, and there was no better time for a bedtime story. And together, we open… * <<link "…The Adventures of $mc and $name." "bed1">><<set $title to "The Adventures of $mc and $name">><</link>> * <<link "…The Chronicles of $mc and $name." "bed1">><<set $title to "The Chronicles of $mc and $name">><</link>> * <<link "…The Legend of $mc and $name." "bed1">><<set $title to "The Legend of $mc and $name">><</link>> * <<link "The title of our story is more original than that..." "typetitle">><<set $title to "none">><</link>>

The title of our story is... <<textbox "$title" "" autofocus>> <<button "Continue" "bed1">><</button>>

<<cacheaudio "almost" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/xywerj44l9tn3ji/almostnew_km.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "gentle">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> <<cycle "$beginning">> <<option "[\"Once upon a time…\"]">> <<option "[\"A long time ago…\"]">> <<option "[\"One day, not very long ago…\"]">> <<option "[\"In the beginning…\"]">> <</cycle>> $mc begins. "There was an adventurer by the name of $mc…" $boynn's eyes widen. "<<if $mche == "he">>Is he as handsome<<elseif $mche == "she">>Is she as beautiful<<else>>Are they as attractive<</if>> as you too, $mcparent?" I <<cycle "$chuckle">> <<option "[chuckle].">> <<option "[snort out a laugh].">> <<option "[tickle their belly buttons].">> <<option "[smile].">> <</cycle>> "Of course. $mc has <<cycle "$hairtexture">> <<option "[straight hair]">> <<option "[wavy hair]">> <<option "[curly hair]">> <</cycle>> and <<cycle "$skincomplexion">> <<option "[a fair complexion]">> <<option "[an olive complexion]">> <<option "[a tan complexion]">> <<option "[a brown complexion]">> <<option "[a dark complexion]">> <<option "[a pale complexion]">> <</cycle>>, just like the two of you." "Does $mc have <<cycle "$mceyecolor">> <<option "[brown eyes]" "brown">> <<option "[hazel eyes]" "hazel">> <<option "[amber eyes]" "amber">> <<option "[blue eyes]" "blue">> <<option "[green eyes]" "green">> <<option "[gray eyes]" "gray">> <</cycle>> and <<cycle "$mchaircolor">> <<option "[black hair]" "black">> <<option "[brown hair]" "brown">> <<option "[blonde hair]" "blond">> <<option "[red hair]" "red">> <</cycle>> like me too?" <<cycle "$leader">> <<option "[$boynn asks]." "$boynn">> <<option "[$girlnn asks]." "$girlnn">> <</cycle>> I doubt none of this is going to be too relevant later, but I decide to humor them anyway. "Oh, that's a very good guess." "But $mc lived somewhere else, far far away," $mc continues. "Do you know where far far away is?" <<button "Continue" "fantasy1">><</button>>

<<if $leader == "$boynn">><<set $follower to "$girlnn">><<else>><<set $follower to "$boynn">><</if>><<if $genre == 2>><<goto fairy1>><<elseif $genre == 3>><<goto scifi1>><<elseif $genre == 4>><<goto myth1>><<elseif $genre == 5>><<goto horror1>><<elseif $genre == 6>><<goto mystery1>><<elseif $genre == 7>><<goto hero1>><<elseif $genre == 8>><<goto adv1>> <<else>>"Oh! And it has… <<cycle "$settingdesc">> <<option "[has lots of spires and towers and dungeons and secret rooms!]" 1>> <<option "[is made of ice on top of a big mountain, guarded by a giant snowman!]" 2>> <<option "[is on top of a floating island in the sky!]" 3>> <<option "[is a really big sand castle! But it's soft and smooth and it doesn't get everywhere.]" 4>> <<option "[is a giant inflatable bouncy castle with lots of slides and ball pits!]" 5>> <<option "[is made of cake and ice cream!]" 6>> <<option "[is on the back of a giant turtle!]" 7>> <<option "[is near an active volcano, and it's surrounded by a lava moat!]" 8>> <<option "[is surrounded by a really big wall, and there's lots of cannons and catapults!]" 9>> <</cycle>>" $mc laughs at our childrens' enthusiasm. "And what is the kingdom called again?" And with a practiced cheer, they both answer… * <<link "\"Arundel!\"" "fantasy2">><<set $setting to "Arundel">><</link>> * <<link "\"Berbania!\"" "fantasy2">><<set $setting to "Berbania">><</link>> * <<link "\"Caerbannog!\"" "fantasy2">><<set $setting to "Caerbannog">><</link>> * <<link "\"Far Far Away!\"" "fantasy2">><<set $setting to "Far Far Away">><</link>> * <<link "\"High Rule!\"" "fantasy2">><<set $setting to "High Rule">><</link>> * <<link "\"Terebinthia!\"" "fantasy2">><<set $setting to "Terebinthia">><</link>> * <<link "Something else..." "settingtype">><<set $setting to "The kingdom">><</link>> <</if>>

<<if $genre == 2>><<goto fairy2>><<elseif $genre == 3>><<goto scifi2>><<elseif $genre == 4>><<goto myth2>><<elseif $genre == 5>><<goto horror2>><<elseif $genre == 6>><<goto mystery2>><<elseif $genre == 7>><<goto hero2>><<elseif $genre == 8>><<goto adv2>> <<else>> "Alright, so $mc lived in the magical kingdom of $setting. One day, $mc was celebrating $mchis birthday ball in their <<if $settingdesc == 1>>castle which has lots of towers and dungeons and secret rooms<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>ice castle on top of a big mountain<<elseif $settingdesc == 3>>castle floating in the sky<<elseif $settingdesc == 4>>giant sand castle<<elseif $settingdesc == 5>>giant bouncy castle<<elseif $settingdesc == 6>>giant cake and ice cream castle<<elseif $settingdesc == 7>>castle on top of a giant turtle<<elseif $settingdesc == 8>>volcano castle<<else>>castle surrounded by a really big wall<</if>>, when $mche hears a loud explosion." "Ka-BOOM!" I shout, demonstrating the explosion with my hands, the sound still fresh in my mind somehow. "Are they magic fireworks?" asks $leader. "No. They were not fireworks," $mc continues. "It was the evil and fearsome Dark Lord invading $setting. The Dark Lord had never attacked in broad daylight before, so the lazy and sleepy guards weren't prepared." $follower giggles. "They're always sleepy. And he's just angry he wasn't invited to our birthday ball." "Indeed, the Dark Lord saw the celebration to be the perfect opportunity to destroy the castle, and this time he was prepared for the castle's defenses. $mc looked outside the window hoping to see fireworks, but instead, one of the dark knights greeted $mchim with a giant axe. 'Happy birthday, $mc… Muhahahaha!'" <<button "Continue" "fantasy3">><</button>> <</if>>

$setting is called... <<textbox "$setting" "" autofocus>> <<button "Continue" "fantasy2">><</button>>

The twins are completely quiet now, and with a knowing smile from $mc, I take the opportunity to continue. "Of course, $mc wasn't giving up without a fight. Just as $mche <<if $mcplural == true>>were<<else>>was<</if>> about to be cornered, $mche summoned $mchis <<cycle "$mcweapon">> <<option "[weapon and cleaved the knight with her enchanted sword.]" 1>> <<option "[weapon and shot the knight with her enchanted bow.]" 2>> <<option "[staff and scorched the knight with a fireball.]" 3>> <<option "[staff and pierced the knight with an ice lance.]" 4>> <<option "[staff and shocked the knight with a lightning bolt.]" 5>> <<option "[staff and blinded the knight with a light beam.]" 6>> <</cycle>>" "Hyah!" $mc yells, pretending to attack the knight with $mchis hands. "And then the knight shouted, 'Ahh, my eye!'" The twins giggle. It's moments like this, that make me realize that there's probably still people out there discovering our story the first time. <<button "Continue" "fantasy4">><</button>>

"$mc fought valiantly as $mche battled $mchis way out of the castle," I continue. "A dark wizard rained down fire orbs from above, but $mc effortlessly reflected them back to their sender with her <<if $mcweapon == 1>>enchanted sword<<elseif $mcweapon == 2>>enchanted bow<<elseif $mcweapon == 3>>fire shield<<elseif $mcweapon == 4>>ice shield<<elseif $mcweapon == 5>>lightining shield<<else>>light shield<</if>>. Several faceless knights riding black flying horses tried to stop $mc, but they should've known better not to mess with the birthday celebrant. There was another loud explosion, but $mche didn't have to look back to know that the castle gates had <<if $settingdesc == 1>>fallen<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>melted<<elseif $settingdesc == 3>>fallen<<elseif $settingdesc == 4>>crumbled<<elseif $settingdesc == 5>>popped<<elseif $settingdesc == 6>>melted<<elseif $settingdesc == 7>>fallen<<elseif $settingdesc == 8>>fallen<<else>>fallen<</if>>. Exhausted from all the running, $mc knew that $mchis only chance of escaping was to go to the royal magical stables where the unicorns and dragons are kept. But to $mchis surprise…" I pause, and let the real $mc continue. "$mcHe bumped into <<cycle "$height">> <<option "[a short]" 1>> <<option "[a tall]" 3>> <<option "[a Goldilock's height]" 2>> <</cycle>> and <<cycle "$body">> <<option "[slim...]" "slim">> <<option "[athletic...]" "athletic">> <<option "[average...]" "average">> <<option "[chubby...]" "chubby">> <<option "[fat...]" "fat">> <<option "[muscular...]" "muscular">> <</cycle>> * <<link "...human named $name.\"" "fantasy5">><<set $race to "human">><</link>> * <<link "...elf named $name.\"" "fantasy5">><<set $race to "elf">><</link>> * <<link "...orc named $name.\"" "fantasy5">><<set $race to "orc">><</link>> * <<link "...dwarf named $name.\"" "fantasy5">><<set $race to "dwarf">><</link>> * <<link "...halfling named $name.\"" "fantasy5">><<set $race to "halfling">><</link>> * <<link "...gnome named $name.\"" "fantasy5">><<set $race to "gnome">><</link>> * <<link "...goblin named $name.\"" "fantasy5">><<set $race to "goblin">><</link>> * <<link "...vampire named $name.\"" "fantasy5">><<set $race to "vampire">><</link>> * <<link "...werewolf named $name.\"" "fantasy5">><<set $race to "werewolf">><</link>> * <<link "...fairy named $name.\"" "fantasy5">><<set $race to "fairy">><</link>> * <<link "...nephilim named $name.\"" "fantasy5">><<set $race to "nephilim">><</link>> * <<link "...cambion named $name.\"" "fantasy5">><<set $race to "cambion">><</link>>

"$mc raised $mchis <<if $mcweapon == 1>>enchanted sword<<elseif $mcweapon == 2>>enchanted bow<<elseif $mcweapon == 3>>staff<<elseif $mcweapon == 4>>staff<<elseif $mcweapon == 5>>staff<<else>>staff<</if>> at the stranger. 'Who are you?'" I narrate, perfectly remembering the look on $mchis face. "And immediately, $mche realized that the fine-looking stranger couldn't be one of the bad guys if $he—" "Hey, I don't remember that being part of the story!" I glance at our children with a grin. "But it's true." $mc rolls $mchis eyes. "$name <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[looked up]">> <<option "[looked down]">> <<option "[looked straight]">> <</cycle>> at $mc's $mceyecolor eyes, and… * <<link "...turned away silently. $mche could tell that the fine-looking stranger tended to be more quiet and reserved.\"" "fantasy6">><<set $introvert to true>><</link>> * <<link "...smiled. 'I was just about to ask you the same thing.' $mche could tell that the fine-looking stranger was social and outgoing.\"" "fantasy6">><<set $introvert to false>><</link>>

"'That doesn't matter!' I continue, trying to imitate $mc's voice. 'They're almost here. Are you going to help me or not?'" "$name then picked up $his trusty <<cycle "$weapon">> <<option "[enchanted sword]" "enchanted sword">> <<option "[enchanted bow]" "enchanted bow">> <<option "[magical staff]" "magical staff">> <</cycle>> from the ground." You can tell I'm not the main character just with the amount of choices. "'Shall we?' $He said and held out $his other hand." "$mc looked back at $mchis home one more time. 'But what about the castle?'" I open my mouth again, but I manage to stop myself from delivering my own line. $mc smirks when $mche notices my hesitation. "Well? I want to hear it again." ---- * <<link "\"We'll take $setting back. I promise.\"" "bed2">><</link>> * <<link "\"What about $setting? What about you?!\"" "bed2">><</link>> * <<link "\"I can't save them anymore. But I can still save you.\"" "bed2">><</link>>

<<if $weapon == "enchanted bow" || $weapon == "laser pistol" || $weapon == "blessed bow" || $weapon == "blessed crossbow" || $weapon == "crossbow" || $weapon == "silenced pistols">><<set $ranged to true>><</if>> <<if $weapon == "magical staff" || $weapon == "blessed staff">><<set $magic to true>><</if>> <<if $race == "vampire" || $race == "fairy" || $race == "nephilim" || $race == "cambion">><<set $flight to true>><</if>>And then we both chuckle at each other. Both at the corny line, and the fact that we actually did it after everything. "And then?" $leader looks at us impatiently as if we never told the story before. "What happened next, $mcparent?" $mc glances at the clock on the wall just as it turns eight. "And then $boy and $girl went to sleep like good little children." "Aww…" the siblings cry in unison. "Now sleep. You don't want to miss saying goodbye to your $parent tomorrow, do you?" They both shook their heads. "Nope!" $boynn snuggles beside his sister. "When will you be back, $parent?" I sit beside them on the bed. <<cycle "$temp1">> <<option "[\"A month.\"]">> <<option "[\"Thirty days.\"]">> <<option "[\"I'll be back before you know it.\"]">> <</cycle>> "Pwomise?" asks $girlnn with matching puppy eyes. I sigh. Of course it's a promise. But I'm kidding myself if I don't see any complications in my line of work. "Don't worry $girlnn. When I'm back, I promise… * <<link "...we'll take a trip to the fantasy zoo!\"" "bed3">><</link>> * <<link "...I'll shower you with kisses and cuddles every day!\"" "bed3">><</link>> * <<link "...bring toys and food and souvenirs from my trip!\"" "bed3">><</link>> * <<link "...I'll have new stories to tell my most favorite children in the world!\"" "bed3">><</link>> * <<link "...we'll finally get the treehouse built!\"" "bed3">><</link>>

"Okay, $parent. Goodnight!" "Goodnight," I say as I stand back up. "And don't let the pillow monsters bite," adds $mc. Well, that too. And with that, we tuck them in, kiss them goodnight, and turn off the lampshade, [[like we always do.|bed4]]

<<cacheaudio "omw" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/6ecmu9mw6q77p09/onmyway_km.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "almost">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> <<if $ex is true>><<set _flavor to "We're married">><<else>><<set _flavor to "We got married">><</if>>"You know," $mche says once the door is firmly shut. "When I first introduced you to the Foundation, I never thought you'd still be working in it today." Right, I'm leaving tomorrow for my new assignment. I'm part of an expedition team—or 'ensemble cast, as we call it—surveying a new story world, working as a biblio-anthropologist. You know, studying character demographics, tropes, and worldbuilding elements by pretending to live there as a local. The best part? I don't need to stay in-character. * <<link "\"Actually, I'm thinking of getting reassigned and start working locally like you.\"" "bed5">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"_flavor. You know adventure's my middle name.\"" "bed5">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Well, it keeps me busy while waiting for the sequel.\"" "bed5">><<set $text to 3>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>"I can't argue with that…"<<elseif $text == 2>>"I guess that makes sense…"<<else>>"Are you sure?"<</if>> $mcHes definitely acting weird and out-of-character. "Is this about the thing you were going to tell me before we got interrupted?" I ask. $mcHe <<if $mcplural == true>>look<<else>>looks<</if>> at the floor. "I was just a little worried that…" "About what?" I ask as I start heading back to <<if $ex == true>>my<<else>>our<</if>> room. "It's been about four years and there has been only like two noodle incidents. We've faced worse during our story." $mcHe takes a deep breath. "You're right. I'm probably just tired." $mcHe stops in front of the door. "Call me if you need anything, 'kay? I gotta finish the rest of my reports." <<linkreplace "Well, that was eventful.">>Well, that was eventful. Now to finish packing… ---- * <<link "Good thing I'm very organized—canonically and in actuality." "bed6">><<set $organized to 1>><</link>> * <<link "My room and luggage are both messily organized. I don't really see the point in organizing properly when it'll get messy again later anyway." "bed6">><<set $organized to 2>><</link>> * <<link "Honestly, I just dump everything into my luggage. For some reason, I just know where something is when I need it." "bed6">><<set $organized to 3>><</link>> <</linkreplace>>

"Oh! And $mche lived in a <<cycle "$settingdesc">> <<option "[gingerbread house!]" 1>> <<option "[shoe-shaped house!]" 2>> <<option "[big tree house!]" 3>> <<option "[giant mushroom.]" 4>> <<option "[house dug into the hillside!]" 5>> <</cycle>>" $mc laughs at our childrens' enthusiasm. "And what is the forest called again?" And with a practiced cheer, they both answer… * <<link "\"The Wildwoods!\"" "fairy2">><<set $setting to "The Wildwoods">><</link>> * <<link "\"The Forbidden Forest!\"" "fairy2">><<set $setting to "The Forbidden Forest">><</link>> * <<link "\"The Thousand Acre Wood!\"" "fairy2">><<set $setting to "The Thousand Acre Wood">><</link>> * <<link "\"The Misty Groves!\"" "fairy2">><<set $setting to "The Misty Groves">><</link>> * <<link "Something else..." "settingtype">><<set $setting to "The forest">><</link>>

"Alright, so $mc lived in the enchanted forest, $setting. One day, $mc was celebrating $mchis birthday inside $mchis <<if $settingdesc == 1>>gingerbread house<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>shoe-shaped house<<elseif $settingdesc == 3>>big tree house<<elseif $settingdesc == 4>>giant mushroom<<else>>little house dug into the hillside<</if>>, when $mche heard someone knocking into $mchis humble abode. A voice called out, '$mc… $mc…'" "Is it your fairy godparents?" asks $leader. "Maybe they finally stopped being late." "No," $mc continues. "It was an old woman with a nose as long and sharp as a stick, carrying a basketful of cupcakes in her hand." $follower giggles. "Oh, it's the Evil Fairy King's minions again. Why do they always try to pretend to be an old woman?" "He's just angry he wasn't invited to your birthday party, $mcparent." "But of course, $mc knew she was no old woman at all, and that eating the sweet and delicious cupcakes meant eternal sleep. It was one of the king's minions, and indeed, she was angry for not being invited, and now she wants to destroy their <<if $settingdesc == 1>>gingerbread house<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>shoe-shaped house<<elseif $settingdesc == 3>>tree house<<elseif $settingdesc == 4>>mushroom house<<else>>little hillside home<</if>>. Realizing that $mc was too smart to fool, she flicked her fingers, and then, there was a bright flash of light. And just like that, the door turned to dust." <<button "Continue" "fairy3">><</button>>

The twins are completely quiet now, and with a knowing smile from $mc, I take the opportunity to continue. "Of course, $mche <<if $mcplural == true>>weren't<<else>>wasn't<</if>> giving up without a fight. Just as $mche <<if $mcplural == true>>were<<else>>was<</if>> about to be cornered, $mc <<cycle "$mcweapon">> <<option "[casts a sleeping spell at her.]" 1>> <<option "[casts a freezing spell at her.]" 2>> <<option "[casts a blinding spell at her.]" 3>> <<option "[casts a polymorph spell at her.]" 4>> <<option "[casts a dancing spell at her.]" 5>> <<option "[summoned the forest animals to attack her.]" 6>> <</cycle>>" "Hyah!" $mc yells, pretending to cast a spell with $mchis hands. "And then the evil fairy shouted 'Agh! Curse you! My beautiful face!'" The twins giggle. It's moments like this, that make me realize that there's probably still people out there discovering our story the first time. <<button "Continue" "fairy4">><</button>>

"But the fairy was resilient, and she partially resisted the effects of the spell," I continue. "'Attack!' the evil fairy commanded, <<if $mcweapon == 1>>still half dizzy from the sleeping spell<<elseif $mcweapon == 2>>still shivering from the freezing spell<<elseif $mcweapon == 3>>her vision still blurry from the blinding spell<<elseif $mcweapon == 4>>her ears growing large and furry thanks to the polymorph spell<<elseif $mcweapon == 5>>her hips swaying uncontrollably thanks to the dancing spell<<else>>as a flock of birds peck at her from all directions<</if>>. His evil minions poofed to his side, and started chasing $mc." "There were too many of them, however, so $mche had no choice to escape. Exhausted from all the running, $mc knew that $mchis only chance of escaping was to summon $mchis <<cycle "$temp1">> <<option "[magic carpet]">> <<option "[pet rainbow unicorn]">> <<option "[pumpkin carriage]">> <<option "[magical pet dragon]">> <</cycle>> $mche hid behind a large mushroom, but to $mchis surprise…" I pause, and let the real $mc continue. "$mcHe bumped into <<cycle "$height">> <<option "[a short]">> <<option "[a tall]">> <<option "[a Goldilock's height]">> <</cycle>> and <<cycle "$body">> <<option "[slim...]" "slim">> <<option "[athletic...]" "athletic">> <<option "[average...]" "average">> <<option "[chubby...]" "chubby">> <<option "[fat...]" "fat">> <<option "[muscular...]" "muscular">> <</cycle>> * <<link "...human named $name.\"" "fairy5">><<set $race to "human">><</link>> * <<link "...elf named $name.\"" "fairy5">><<set $race to "elf">><</link>> * <<link "...orc named $name.\"" "fairy5">><<set $race to "orc">><</link>> * <<link "...dwarf named $name.\"" "fairy5">><<set $race to "dwarf">><</link>> * <<link "...halfling named $name.\"" "fairy5">><<set $race to "halfling">><</link>> * <<link "...gnome named $name.\"" "fairy5">><<set $race to "gnome">><</link>> * <<link "...goblin named $name.\"" "fairy5">><<set $race to "goblin">><</link>> * <<link "...vampire named $name.\"" "fairy5">><<set $race to "vampire">><</link>> * <<link "...werewolf named $name.\"" "fairy5">><<set $race to "werewolf">><</link>> * <<link "...fairy named $name.\"" "fairy5">><<set $race to "fairy">><</link>> * <<link "...nephilim named $name.\"" "fairy5">><<set $race to "nephilim">><</link>> * <<link "...cambion named $name.\"" "fairy5">><<set $race to "cambion">><</link>>

"$mc raised $mchis magic wand at the stranger. 'Who are you?'" I narrate, perfectly remembering the look on $mchis face. "And immediately, $mche realized that the fine-looking stranger couldn't be one of the bad guys if $he—" "Hey, I don't remember that being part of the story!" I glance at our children with a grin. "But it's true." $mc rolls $mchis eyes. "$name <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[looked up]">> <<option "[looked down]">> <<option "[looked straight]">> <</cycle>> at $mc's $mceyecolor eyes, and… * <<link "...turned away silently. $mche could tell that the fine-looking stranger tended to be more quiet and reserved.\"" "fairy6">><<set $introvert to true>><</link>> * <<link "...smiled. 'I was just about to ask you the same thing.' $mche could tell that the fine-looking stranger was social and outgoing.\"" "fairy6">><<set $introvert to false>><</link>>

"'That doesn't matter!' I continue, trying to imitate $mc's voice. 'They're almost here. Are you going to help me or not?'" "$name then picked up $his trusty <<cycle "$weapon">> <<option "[enchanted sword]" "enchanted sword">> <<option "[enchanted bow]" "enchanted bow">> <<option "[magical staff]" "magical staff">> <</cycle>> from the ground." You can tell I'm not the main character just with the amount of choices. "'Shall we?' $he said and held out $his other hand." "$mc looked back at $mchis home one more time. 'But what about the forest? My home?'" I open my mouth again, but I manage to stop myself from delivering my own line. $mc smirks when $mche notices my hesitation. "Well? I want to hear it again." ---- * <<link "\"We'll take $setting back. I promise.\"" "bed2">><</link>> * <<link "\"What about $setting? What about you?!\"" "bed2">><</link>> * <<link "\"I can't save them anymore. But I can still save you.\"" "bed2">><</link>>

"Oh! And it has <<cycle "$settingdesc">> <<option "[is very long, with lots of floors and wings at the side!]" 1>> <<option "[looks like a giant flying saucer!]" 2>> <<option "[has lots of rocket launchers, laser turrets and a force field!]" 3>> <<option "[looks like a giant robot head!]" 4>> <<option "[looks like a small planet with rings spinning around it!]" 5>> <</cycle>>" $mc laughs at our childrens' enthusiasm. "And what is the space station called?" And with a practiced cheer, they both answer… * <<link "\"Armistice!\"" "scifi2">><<set $setting to "Armistice">><</link>> * <<link "\"Babylon!\"" "scifi2">><<set $setting to "Babylon">><</link>> * <<link "\"Deep Space!\"" "scifi2">><<set $setting to "Deep Space">><</link>> * <<link "\"Genesis V!\"" "scifi2">><<set $setting to "Genesis V">><</link>> * <<link "\"Serenity!\"" "scifi2">><<set $setting to "Serenity">><</link>> * <<link "\"The Skeld!\"" "scifi2">><<set $setting to "The Skeld">><</link>> * <<link "Something else..." "settingtype">><<set $setting to "The space station">><</link>>

"Alright, so $mc lived in the space station, $setting. One day, $mche <<if $mcplural == true>>were<<else>>was<</if>> celebrating $mchis birthday in one of the observation decks, when $mche heard an explosion." "Ka-BOOM!" I shout, demonstrating the explosion with my hands, as if we could hear explosions in space. "Are they fireworks?" asks $leader. "Can there be fireworks in space?" "Yes, but they wouldn't be pretty," replied $mc. "But they were no fireworks. They were breaching pods sent by the alien mothership, and they have arrived to crash the party." "But I thought the space station has rockets and lasers and forcefields?" Oh, there were lots of them to be sure, but little did $mc know, there was an impostor inside the station that sabotaged them." $follower frowns. "Aww…" "Ehem. And so, several alien-controlled robots crawled out of the pod, speaking in a monotone voice. 'DEE-STROY. DEE-STROY.'" "They always say that." $follower giggles. "The aliens are just angry they weren't invited to your birthday party." "Indeed, and now they want to destroy $setting. The alien mothership loomed over $setting, as more pods crashed into the station. Alarms were blaring, explosions rattled the station, and it wasn't long until the robots found where $mc is. 'DETECTED, $mc. $mc, DETECTED.'" <<button "Continue" "scifi3">><</button>>

The twins are completely quiet now, and with a knowing smile from $mc, I take the opportunity to continue. "Of course, $mche <<if $mcplural == true>>weren't<<else>>wasn't<</if>> giving up without a fight. Just as $mche <<if $mcplural == true>>were<<else>>was<</if>> about to be cornered, $mc <<cycle "$mcweapon">> <<option "[slices the robots with $mchis energy sword.]" 1>> <<option "[shoots the robots with $mchis laser blasters.]" 2>> <<option "[shoots the robots with $mchis plasma gun.]" 3>> <<option "[shoots the robots with $mchis beam cannon.]" 4>> <</cycle>>" "Hyah!" $mc yells, pretending to attack the robots with $mchis hands. "And then the robots say, 'ERROR, ERROR!'" The twins giggle. It's moments like this, that make me realize that there's probably still people out there discovering our story the first time. <<button "Continue" "scifi4">><</button>>

"But still, the robots kept on coming," I continue. "$mc shuts the pursuing robots down one by one as $mc ran towards the docking bay. $mche finally reached it, and luckily, there was one escape pod left that wasn't destroyed. But to $mchis surprise…" I pause, and let the real $mc continue. "$mcHe bumped into <<cycle "$height">> <<option "[a short]">> <<option "[a tall]">> <<option "[a Goldilock's height]">> <</cycle>> and <<cycle "$body">> <<option "[slim...]" "slim">> <<option "[athletic...]" "athletic">> <<option "[average...]" "average">> <<option "[chubby...]" "chubby">> <<option "[fat...]" "fat">> <<option "[muscular...]" "muscular">> <</cycle>> * <<link "...human named $name.\"" "scifi5">><<set $race to "human">><</link>> * <<link "...elf named $name.\"" "scifi5">><<set $race to "elf">><</link>> * <<link "...orc named $name.\"" "scifi5">><<set $race to "orc">><</link>> * <<link "...dwarf named $name.\"" "scifi5">><<set $race to "dwarf">><</link>> * <<link "...halfling named $name.\"" "scifi5">><<set $race to "halfling">><</link>> * <<link "...gnome named $name.\"" "scifi5">><<set $race to "gnome">><</link>> * <<link "...goblin named $name.\"" "scifi5">><<set $race to "goblin">><</link>> * <<link "...vampire named $name.\"" "scifi5">><<set $race to "vampire">><</link>> * <<link "...werewolf named $name.\"" "scifi5">><<set $race to "werewolf">><</link>> * <<link "...fairy named $name.\"" "scifi5">><<set $race to "fairy">><</link>> * <<link "...nephilim named $name.\"" "scifi5">><<set $race to "nephilim">><</link>> * <<link "...cambion named $name.\"" "scifi5">><<set $race to "cambion">><</link>>

"$mc raised $mchis weapon at the stranger. 'Who are you?'" I narrate, perfectly remembering the look on $mchis face. "And immediately, $mche realized that the fine-looking stranger couldn't be one of the bad guys if $he—" "Hey, I don't remember that being part of the story!" I glance at our children with a grin. "But it's true." $mc rolls $mchis eyes. "$name <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[looked up]">> <<option "[looked down]">> <<option "[looked straight]">> <</cycle>> at $mc's $mceyecolor eyes, and… * <<link "...turned away silently. $mche could tell that the fine-looking stranger tended to be more quiet and reserved.\"" "scifi6">><<set $introvert to true>><</link>> * <<link "...smiled. 'I was just about to ask you the same thing.' $mche could tell that the fine-looking stranger was social and outgoing.\"" "scifi6">><<set $introvert to false>><</link>>

"'That doesn't matter!' I continue, trying to imitate $mc's voice. 'They're almost here. Are you going to help me escape or not?'" "$name then picked up $his trusty <<cycle "$weapon">> <<option "[energy sword]" "energy sword">> <<option "[laser pistol]" "laser pistol">> <</cycle>> from the ground." You can tell I'm not the main character just with the amount of choices. "'Shall we?' $he said and held out $his other hand." "$mc looked back at their home one more time. 'But what about the space station?'" I open my mouth again, but I manage to stop myself from delivering my own line. $mc smirks when $mche notices my hesitation. "Well? I want to hear it again." ---- * <<link "\"We'll take $setting back. I promise.\"" "bed2">><</link>> * <<link "\"What about $setting? What about you?!\"" "bed2">><</link>> * <<link "\"I can't save them anymore. But I can still save you.\"" "bed2">><</link>>

"Oh! And it has <<cycle "$settingdesc">> <<option "[is a huge forest with with a giant magical tree in the center!]" 1>> <<option "[is an archipelago in the middle of a never-ending ocean!]" 2>> <<option "[is in the center of the earth in a really big cave!]" 3>> <<option "[has lots of really tall hills and mountains!]" 4>> <<option "[is very cloudy, and there's lots of beautiful flowers everywhere you go!]" 5>> <<option "[is where the good and bad spirits go!]" 6>> <<option "[is in eternal twilight, and there's lots of comets and shooting stars!]" 7>> <</cycle>>" $mc laughs at our childrens' enthusiasm. "And what is the celestial realm called again?" And with a practiced cheer, they both answer… * <<link "\"Agartha!\"" "myth2">><<set $setting to "Agartha">><</link>> * <<link "\"Bottomworld!\"" "myth2">><<set $setting to "Bottomworld">><</link>> * <<link "\"Eternal Fields!\"" "myth2">><<set $setting to "Eternal Fields">><</link>> * <<link "\"Otherrealm!\"" "myth2">><<set $setting to "Otherrealm">><</link>> * <<link "\"Over-Earth!\"" "myth2">><<set $setting to "Over-Earth">><</link>> * <<link "\"The Far Lands!\"" "myth2">><<set $setting to "The Far Lands">><</link>> * <<link "\"The Forgotten!\"" "myth2">><<set $setting to "The Forgotten">><</link>> * <<link "Something else..." "settingtype">><<set $setting to "The celestial realm">><</link>>

"Alright, so $mc lived in the celestial realm, $setting, away from mortal eyes. One day, $mche <<if $mcplural == true>>were<<else>>was<</if>> celebrating $mchis birthday <<if $settingdesc == 1>>in the tallest and largest tree in the forest<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>in the beach<<elseif $settingdesc == 3>>in their cave, near the center of the earth<<elseif $settingdesc == 4>>on the tallest mountain in the realm<<elseif $settingdesc == 5>>in a field full of beautiful and fragrant flowers<<elseif $settingdesc == 6>>with the spirits<<else>>watching the comets and shooting stars in the sky<</if>>, when $mche heard a loud, thunderous roar in the distance." "Oh, is it your loud uncle coming to your party?" asks $leader. "No, it was something much worse. Manticores, chimera, and other mythical creatures were coming to crash the party." $follower giggles. "The monsters are just angry they weren't invited to our birthday party." "Indeed, one of the gods must be furious for not being invited, for them to send a whole horde. The monsters eventually reached $mc's abode, and a large cyclops raises his big giant club, screaming, '$mc!!!'" <<button "Continue" "myth3">><</button>>

The twins are completely quiet now, and with a knowing smile from $mc, I take the opportunity to continue. "Of course, $mche <<if $mcplural == true>>weren't<<else>>wasn't<</if>> giving up without a fight. Just as $mche <<if $mcplural == true>>were<<else>>was<</if>> about to be cornered, $mc <<cycle "$mcweapon">> <<option "[slices them with her legendary sword.]" 1>> <<option "[shoots them with her legendary bow.]" 2>> <<option "[pierces them with her legendary spear.]" 3>> <<option "[bashes them with her legendary shield.]" 4>> <<option "[smashes them with her legendary gauntlets.]" 5>> <</cycle>>" "Hyah!" $mc yells, pretending to attack the monsters with $mchis hands. "And then the cyclops shouted, 'Ahh! My eye!'" The twins giggle. It's moments like this, that make me realize that there's probably still people out there discovering our story the first time. <<button "Continue" "myth4">><</button>>

"But there were more monsters coming," I continue. "A massive shadow loomed in the distance, and then $mche heard the roar once again. It was a colossal monster with a hundred hands and a hundred heads. But still, $mc continued to whack monsters left and right, and finally, $mche reached <<if $settingdesc == 1>>a clearing<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>the shores<<elseif $settingdesc == 3>>the cave's opening<<elseif $settingdesc == 4>>the foot of the mountain<<elseif $settingdesc == 5>>a clearing<<elseif $settingdesc == 6>>the realm gates<<else>>the realm gates<</if>>. But to $mchis surprise…" I pause, and let the real $mc continue. "$mcHe bumped into <<cycle "$height">> <<option "[a short]">> <<option "[a tall]">> <<option "[a Goldilock's height]">> <</cycle>> and <<cycle "$body">> <<option "[slim...]" "slim">> <<option "[athletic...]" "athletic">> <<option "[average...]" "average">> <<option "[chubby...]" "chubby">> <<option "[fat...]" "fat">> <<option "[muscular...]" "muscular">> <</cycle>> * <<link "...human named $name.\"" "myth5">><<set $race to "human">><</link>> * <<link "...elf named $name.\"" "myth5">><<set $race to "elf">><</link>> * <<link "...orc named $name.\"" "myth5">><<set $race to "orc">><</link>> * <<link "...dwarf named $name.\"" "myth5">><<set $race to "dwarf">><</link>> * <<link "...halfling named $name.\"" "myth5">><<set $race to "halfling">><</link>> * <<link "...gnome named $name.\"" "myth5">><<set $race to "gnome">><</link>> * <<link "...goblin named $name.\"" "myth5">><<set $race to "goblin">><</link>> * <<link "...vampire named $name.\"" "myth5">><<set $race to "vampire">><</link>> * <<link "...werewolf named $name.\"" "myth5">><<set $race to "werewolf">><</link>> * <<link "...fairy named $name.\"" "myth5">><<set $race to "fairy">><</link>> * <<link "...nephilim named $name.\"" "myth5">><<set $race to "nephilim">><</link>> * <<link "...cambion named $name.\"" "myth5">><<set $race to "cambion">><</link>>

"$mc raised $mchis weapon at the stranger. 'Who are you?'" I narrate, perfectly remembering the look on $mchis face. "And immediately, $mche realized that the fine-looking stranger couldn't be one of the bad guys if $he—" "Hey, I don't remember that being part of the story!" I glance at our children with a grin. "But it's true." $mc rolls $mchis eyes. "$name <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[looked up]">> <<option "[looked down]">> <<option "[looked straight]">> <</cycle>> at $mc's $mceyecolor eyes, and… * <<link "...turned away silently. $mche could tell that the fine-looking stranger tended to be more quiet and reserved.\"" "myth6">><<set $introvert to true>><</link>> * <<link "...smiled. 'I was just about to ask you the same thing.' $mche could tell that the fine-looking stranger was social and outgoing.\"" "myth6">><<set $introvert to false>><</link>>

"'That doesn't matter!' I continue, trying to imitate $mc's voice. 'They're almost here. Are you going to help me or not?'" "$name then picked up $his trusty <<cycle "$weapon">> <<option "[blessed sword]" "blessed sword">> <<option "[blessed bow]" "blessed bow">> <<option "[blessed staff]" "blessed staff">> <</cycle>> from the ground." You can tell I'm not the main character just with the amount of choices. "'Shall we?' $he said and held out $his other hand." "$mc looked back at $mchis home one more time. 'What about everyone else?'" I open my mouth again, but I manage to stop myself from delivering my own line. $mc smirks when $mche notices my hesitation. "Well? I want to hear it again." ---- * <<link "\"We'll take $setting back. I promise.\"" "bed2">><</link>> * <<link "\"What about $setting? What about you?!\"" "bed2">><</link>> * <<link "\"I can't save them anymore. But I can still save you.\"" "bed2">><</link>>

"Oh! And the village is near <<cycle "$settingdesc">> <<option "[a forest!]" 1>> <<option "[a lake!]" 2>> <<option "[a graveyard!]" 3>> <<option "[a hospital!]" 4>> <<option "[a school!]" 5>> <<option "[an amusement park!]" 6>> <</cycle>>" $mc laughs at our childrens' enthusiasm. "And what is the village called again?" And with a practiced cheer, they both answer… * <<link "\"Hawkins!\"" "horror2">><<set $setting to "Hawkins">><</link>> * <<link "\"Lavender Town!\"" "horror2">><<set $setting to "Lavender Town">><</link>> * <<link "\"Nightvale!\"" "horror2">><<set $setting to "Nightvale">><</link>> * <<link "\"Raccoon Village!\"" "horror2">><<set $setting to "Raccoon Village">><</link>> * <<link "\"Sleepy Hollow!\"" "horror2">><<set $setting to "Sleepy Hollow">><</link>> * <<link "\"Stoneybrook!\"" "horror2">><<set $setting to "Stoneybrook">><</link>> * <<link "\"Sunnydale!\"" "horror2">><<set $setting to "Sunnydale">><</link>> * <<link "\"Twin Crests!\"" "horror2">><<set $setting to "Twin Crests">><</link>> * <<link "\"Winden!\"" "horror2">><<set $setting to "Winden">><</link>> * <<link "Something else..." "settingtype">><<set $setting to "The village">><</link>>

"Alright, so $mc lived in the haunted village, $setting, where ghosts and other creatures of the dark were rumored to live. One night, $mc was celebrating $mchis birthday <<if $settingdesc == 1>>near the forest<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>near the lake<<elseif $settingdesc == 3>>in a building near the graveyard<<elseif $settingdesc == 4>>in a building near the hospital<<elseif $settingdesc == 5>>near the school<<else>>in the amusement park<</if>>, when $mche <<if $mcplural == true>>hear <<else>>hears <</if>> someone whisper $mchis name. '$mc… $mc…'" "Is it you, $parent?" asks $leader. "No, it didn't sound like $him. There was someone else watching $mc." $follower giggles. "Maybe a ghost got angry because you didn't invited them to your birthday party." "Indeed, it was the ghost <<if $settingdesc == 1>>who got lost in the woods<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>who drowned in the lake<<elseif $settingdesc == 3>>whose body was stolen from the graveyard<<elseif $settingdesc == 4>>who died in the hospital<<elseif $settingdesc == 5>>who died in the school<<else>>who died in the amusement park<</if>>, and they're angry. First, the lights flickered. There was a cold gust of wind, a creak somewhere $mche couldn't see, a voice whispering in the shadows. And then tables, chairs, and utensils started flying all over the place, trying to hit $mc as $mche <<if $mcplural == true>>scurry <<else>>scurries <</if>> to hide inside a conveniently placed closet. And then, when $mche thought it was over, $mche heard someone breathing behind $mchim." <<button "Continue" "horror3">><</button>>

The twins are completely quiet now, and with a knowing smile from $mc, I take the opportunity to continue. "Of course, $mc wasn't giving up without a fight. $mcHe <<if $mcplural == true>>were<<else>>was<</if>> prepared, and <<cycle "$mcweapon">> <<option "[sprayed the ghost with holy water.]" 1>> <<option "[shot the ghost with $mchis salt n' garlic gun.]" 2>> <<option "[scared the ghost away with a protective ward.]" 3>> <<option "[striked the ghost with a stingray tail.]" 4>> <<option "[captured the ghost with $mchis ghost vacuum.]" 5>> <<option "[threw a holy hand grenade at the ghost.]" 6>> <<option "[shot the ghost with $mchis silver crossbow.]" 7>> <</cycle>>" "Hyah!" $mc yells, pretending to scare away the ghost with $mchis hands. "And then the ghost shouted, 'Not agaaain!'" The twins giggle. It's moments like this, that make me realize that there's probably still people out there discovering our story the first time. <<button "Continue" "horror4">><</button>>

"But that wasn't the only ghost," I continue. "Disturbed by the ghost's screams, skeletons, vampires and headless zombies started to rise and crawl on the very ground they were standing on." "A manananggal swooped towards $mc as $mche ran away, but she was no match for $mc's <<if $mcweapon == 1>>holy water spray<<elseif $mcweapon == 2>>garlic gun<<elseif $mcweapon == 3>>protective ward<<elseif $mcweapon == 4>>stingray whip<<elseif $mcweapon == 5>>ghost vacuum<<elseif $mcweapon == 6>>holy grenades<<else>>crossbow<</if>>. After dodging the angry spirits and the living dead left and right, $mche finally reached the safety of $mchis van. But to $mchis surprise…" I pause, and let the real $mc continue. "$mcHe bumped into <<cycle "$height">> <<option "[a short]">> <<option "[a tall]">> <<option "[a Goldilock's height]">> <</cycle>> and <<cycle "$body">> <<option "[slim...]" "slim">> <<option "[athletic...]" "athletic">> <<option "[average...]" "average">> <<option "[chubby...]" "chubby">> <<option "[fat...]" "fat">> <<option "[muscular...]" "muscular">> <</cycle>> * <<link "...human named $name.\"" "horror5">><<set $race to "human">><</link>> * <<link "...elf named $name.\"" "horror5">><<set $race to "elf">><</link>> * <<link "...orc named $name.\"" "horror5">><<set $race to "orc">><</link>> * <<link "...dwarf named $name.\"" "horror5">><<set $race to "dwarf">><</link>> * <<link "...halfling named $name.\"" "horror5">><<set $race to "halfling">><</link>> * <<link "...gnome named $name.\"" "horror5">><<set $race to "gnome">><</link>> * <<link "...goblin named $name.\"" "horror5">><<set $race to "goblin">><</link>> * <<link "...vampire named $name.\"" "horror5">><<set $race to "vampire">><</link>> * <<link "...werewolf named $name.\"" "horror5">><<set $race to "werewolf">><</link>> * <<link "...fairy named $name.\"" "horror5">><<set $race to "fairy">><</link>> * <<link "...nephilim named $name.\"" "horror5">><<set $race to "nephilim">><</link>> * <<link "...cambion named $name.\"" "horror5">><<set $race to "cambion">><</link>>

"$mc raised $mchis weapon at the stranger. 'Who are you?'" I narrate, perfectly remembering the look on $mchis face. "And immediately, $mche realized that the fine-looking stranger couldn't be one of the bad guys if $he—" "Hey, I don't remember that being part of the story!" I glance at our children with a grin. "But it's true." $mc rolls $mchis eyes. "$name <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[looked up]">> <<option "[looked down]">> <<option "[looked straight]">> <</cycle>> at $mc's $mceyecolor eyes, and… * <<link "...turned away silently. $mche could tell that the fine-looking stranger tended to be more quiet and reserved.\"" "horror6">><<set $introvert to true>><</link>> * <<link "...smiled. 'I was just about to ask you the same thing.' $mche could tell that the fine-looking stranger was social and outgoing.\"" "horror6">><<set $introvert to false>><</link>>

"'That doesn't matter!' I continue, trying to imitate $mc's voice. 'They're almost here. Are you going to help me or not?'" "$name then picked up $his trusty <<cycle "$weapon">> <<option "[blessed sword]" "blessed sword">> <<option "[blessed crossbow]" "blessed crossbow">> <</cycle>> from the ground." You can tell I'm not the main character just with the amount of choices. "'Shall we?' $he said and held out $his other hand." "$mc looked back at the village one more time. 'But what about the village?'" I open my mouth again, but I manage to stop myself from delivering my own line. $mc smirks when $mche notices my hesitation. "Well? I want to hear it again." ---- * <<link "\"We'll take $setting back. I promise.\"" "bed2">><</link>> * <<link "\"What about $setting? What about you?!\"" "bed2">><</link>> * <<link "\"I can't save them anymore. But I can still save you.\"" "bed2">><</link>>

"Oh, oh! And there's rumors of a mafia <<cycle "$settingdesc">> <<option "[who kidnaps bad children!]" 1>> <<option "[who steals all the ice cream!]" 2>> <<option "[who abducts all the pets in the neighborhood!]" 3>> <</cycle>>" $mc laughs at our childrens' enthusiasm. "And what is the town called again?" And with a practiced cheer, they both answer… * <<link "\"Hawkins!\"" "mystery2">><<set $setting to "Hawkins">><</link>> * <<link "\"Lavender Town!\"" "mystery2">><<set $setting to "Lavender Town">><</link>> * <<link "\"Nightvale!\"" "mystery2">><<set $setting to "Nightvale">><</link>> * <<link "\"Raccoon Village!\"" "mystery2">><<set $setting to "Raccoon Village">><</link>> * <<link "\"Sleepy Hollow!\"" "mystery2">><<set $setting to "Sleepy Hollow">><</link>> * <<link "\"Stoneybrook!\"" "mystery2">><<set $setting to "Stoneybrook">><</link>> * <<link "\"Sunnydale!\"" "mystery2">><<set $setting to "Sunnydale">><</link>> * <<link "\"Twin Crests!\"" "mystery2">><<set $setting to "Twin Crests">><</link>> * <<link "\"Winden!\"" "mystery2">><<set $setting to "Winden">><</link>> * <<link "Something else..." "settingtype">><<set $setting to "The town">><</link>>

$boynn and $girlnn picked up their pencils, and together, they made quick work of the Atbash cipher. <<if $text == 1>>"They're coming,"<<elseif $text == 2>>"I know who they are,"<<else>>"You are not safe here,"<</if>> the twins whisper excitedly. It's moments like this, that make me realize that there's probably still people out there discovering our story the first time. "$mc reluctantly opened the door and raised $mchis weapon at the stranger." I pause, and let the real $mc continue. "$mcHe looked at <<cycle "$height">> <<option "[the short]">> <<option "[the tall]">> <<option "[the Goldilock's height]">> <</cycle>> and <<cycle "$body">> <<option "[slim...]" "slim">> <<option "[athletic...]" "athletic">> <<option "[average...]" "average">> <<option "[chubby...]" "chubby">> <<option "[fat...]" "fat">> <<option "[muscular...]" "muscular">> <</cycle>> * <<link "...human named $name.\"" "mystery4">><<set $race to "human">><</link>> * <<link "...elf named $name.\"" "mystery4">><<set $race to "elf">><</link>> * <<link "...orc named $name.\"" "mystery4">><<set $race to "orc">><</link>> * <<link "...dwarf named $name.\"" "mystery4">><<set $race to "dwarf">><</link>> * <<link "...halfling named $name.\"" "mystery4">><<set $race to "halfling">><</link>> * <<link "...gnome named $name.\"" "mystery4">><<set $race to "gnome">><</link>> * <<link "...goblin named $name.\"" "mystery4">><<set $race to "goblin">><</link>> * <<link "...vampire named $name.\"" "mystery4">><<set $race to "vampire">><</link>> * <<link "...werewolf named $name.\"" "mystery4">><<set $race to "werewolf">><</link>> * <<link "...fairy named $name.\"" "mystery4">><<set $race to "fairy">><</link>> * <<link "...nephilim named $name.\"" "mystery4">><<set $race to "nephilim">><</link>> * <<link "...cambion named $name.\"" "mystery4">><<set $race to "cambion">><</link>>

"Alright, so $mc recently moved in to $setting, a town with a mysterious, dark secret. The neighborhood was always eerie and silent, especially at night, when people mysteriously disappear. Some people say that there's a secret group of people who <<if $settingdesc == 1>>kidnaps all the children who don't obey their parents<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>steals all the ice cream in town<<else>>abducts all the pets in the neighborhood<</if>>, but to this day, no one has been able to prove their existence. One day, $mc was celebrating $mchis birthday in $mchis house when…" $mc knocks on the bed's headboard, and whispered, "There was a loud knock at the door." "Oh no!" $leader whispers. "Maybe it's the mafia…" "So," $mc continues, "$mche peeked outside, and saw that it was $mchis neighbor who lived across the street." $leader giggles. "Maybe $hes just angry because you didn't invite $him to your birthday party." "But just in case that $mchis neighbor was part of the mafia, $mc grabbed $mchis signature weapon, $mchis <<cycle "$mcweapon">> <<option "[silenced pistol.]" 1>> <<option "[shotgun.]" 2>> <<option "[spiky baseball bat.]" 3>> <<option "[trusty shovel.]" 4>> <<option "[crossbow.]" 5>> <</cycle>>" "$mcHis neighbor knocked again," I continue. "And this time, the stranger slipped a note under the door. $mc picked it up, and inside was a coded letter that read…" $mc writes something on the notebook, and gave it to our junior detectives. It read... * <<link "GSVB'IV XLNRMT" "mystery3">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "R PMLD DSL GSVB ZIV" "mystery3">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "BLF ZIV MLG HZUV SVIV" "mystery3">><<set $text to 3>><</link>>

It was none other than Detective $name. "'Who are you?'" I glance at $mc, perfectly remembering the look on $mchis face. "And immediately, $mche realized that the fine-looking stranger couldn't be one of the bad guys if $he—" "Hey, I don't remember that being part of the story!" I glance at our children with a grin. "But it's true." $mc rolls $mchis eyes. "$name <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[looked up]">> <<option "[looked down]">> <<option "[looked straight]">> <</cycle>> at $mc's $mceyecolor eyes, and… * <<link "...turned away silently. $mche could tell that the fine-looking stranger tended to be more quiet and reserved.\"" "mystery5">><<set $introvert to true>><</link>> * <<link "...smiled. 'I was just about to ask you the same thing.' $mche could tell that the fine-looking stranger was social and outgoing.\"" "mystery5">><<set $introvert to false>><</link>>

"'That doesn't matter!' I continue, trying to imitate $mc's voice. 'How much do you know about the mafia?'" "Enough to tell you that we should leave soon." $name peeked at the corner and pulls out $his trusty <<cycle "$weapon">> <<option "[machete]" "machete">> <<option "[crossbow]" "crossbow">> <</cycle>>." You can tell I'm not the main character just with the amount of choices. "And I should just believe you?" "'Listen,' $name said as $he takes out his wallet, showing $mc a picture. 'They took my family, and I'm not about to let them take someone else." "And so, $mc quickly packed $mchis notebooks, voice-changing bowtie, and magnifying glass. $mc looked back at $mchis home one more time. 'But what about the rest of the town?'" I open my mouth again, but I manage to stop myself from delivering my own line. $mc smirks when $mche notices my hesitation. "Well? I want to hear it again." ---- * <<link "\"We'll take $setting back. I promise.\"" "bed2">><</link>> * <<link "\"What about $setting? What about you?!\"" "bed2">><</link>> * <<link "\"I can't save them anymore. But I can still save you.\"" "bed2">><</link>>

"Oh! And their HQ <<cycle "$settingdesc">> <<option "[is hidden under an active volcano!]" 1>> <<option "[is a huge helicarrier!]" 2>> <<option "[is in a space station!]" 3>> <<option "[is hidden in a really big underground tunnel!]" 4>> <<option "[is a really tall skyscraper!]" 5>> <<option "[is located underwater!]" 6>> <</cycle>>" $mc laughs at our childrens' enthusiasm. "And what is the HQ called again?" And with a practiced cheer, they both answer… * <<link "\"The A.E.G.I.S. Headquarters!\"" "hero2">><<set $setting to "The A.E.G.I.S. Headquarters">><</link>> * <<link "\"The Fortress of Solidarity!\"" "hero2">><<set $setting to "The Fortress of Solidarity">><</link>> * <<link "\"The Hall of Truth!\"" "hero2">><<set $setting to "The Hall of Truth">><</link>> * <<link "\"The Phoenix Den!\"" "hero2">><<set $setting to "The Phoenix Den">><</link>> * <<link "Something else..." "settingtype">><<set $setting to "The HQ">><</link>>

"$mc glared at the stranger. 'Who are you?'" I narrate, perfectly remembering the look on $mchis face. "And immediately, $mche realized that the fine-looking stranger couldn't be one of the bad guys if $he—" "Hey, I don't remember that being part of the story!" I glance at our children with a grin. "But it's true." $mc rolls $mchis eyes. "$name <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[looked up]">> <<option "[looked down]">> <<option "[looked straight at]">> <</cycle>> at $mc's $mceyecolor eyes, and… * <<link "...turned away silently. $mche could tell that the fine-looking stranger tended to be more quiet and reserved.\"" "hero6">><<set $introvert to true>><</link>> * <<link "...smiled. 'I was just about to ask you the same thing.' $mche could tell that the fine-looking stranger was social and outgoing.\"" "hero6">><<set $introvert to false>><</link>>

The twins are completely quiet now, and with a knowing smile from $mc, I take the opportunity to continue. "Of course, this was $mc's favorite part, and $mche wasted no time <<cycle "$mcweapon">> <<option "[shooting the mutant with $mchis particle cannon.]" 1>> <<option "[frying the mutant with $mchis fire and lightning powers.]" 2>> <<option "[clobbering the mutant with $mchis super strength and super speed.]" 3>> <<option "[distracting the mutant with $mchis time and teleportation powers.]" 4>> <<option "[controlling the mutant with $mchis telekinesis and mind control powers.]" 5>> <<option "[stealing and absorbing the mutant's powers.]" 6>> <</cycle>>" "Hyah!" $mc yells, pretending to attack the mutants with $mchis hands. "And then the mutant shouted, 'Ahh! My eye!'" The twins giggle. It's moments like this, that make me realize that there's probably still people out there discovering our story the first time. <<button "Continue" "hero4">><</button>>

"Alright, so Super $mc lived in $mchis secret hideout, $setting. $mcHis <<if $settingdesc == 1>>volcanic base<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>flying fortress<<elseif $settingdesc == 3>>space station<<elseif $settingdesc == 4>>underground base<<elseif $settingdesc == 5>>skyscraper<<else>>underwater base<</if>> was full of new gadgets and inventions. It has almost everything a superhero will ever need. A laboratory, an infirmary, and of course, the bedroom. One day, $mche <<if $mcplural == true>>were<<else>>was<</if>> celebrating $mchis birthday in <<if $settingdesc == 1>>the party chamber<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>the flight deck<<elseif $settingdesc == 3>>the observation deck<<elseif $settingdesc == 4>>the party hall<<elseif $settingdesc == 5>>the rooftop<<else>>the party dome<</if>>, when $mche heard a loud explosion." "Ka-BOOM!" I shout, demonstrating the explosion with my hands, the sound still fresh in my mind somehow. "Are they fireworks?" $leader asks. <<if $settingdesc == 3>>"Oh wait, our base is in space. Can there be fireworks in space?" "Yes, but they wouldn't be pretty," replied $mc. "And those were not fireworks. It was the super mutants. They <<elseif $settingdesc == 6>>"Oh wait, our base is underwater…" "No. They were not fireworks. The super mutants <</if>> have finally found Super $mc's hideout." $follower giggles. "The mutants are just angry they weren't invited to your birthday party." "Indeed, the mutants were very angry, and now they want to destroy the <<if $settingdesc == 1>>volcano<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>helicarrier<<elseif $settingdesc == 3>>space station<<elseif $settingdesc == 4>>tunnels<<elseif $settingdesc == 5>>tower<<else>>underwater base<</if>>. The security AI activated, and says in a monotone voice, 'MOO-TANTS DETECTED. MOO-TANTS DETECTED.' The first wave of mutants were easily defeated by the hidden traps. "The second and third waves, however, were smart enough to avoid most of them, but once they reached <<if $settingdesc == 1>>the party chamber<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>the flight deck<<elseif $settingdesc == 3>>the observation deck<<elseif $settingdesc == 4>>the party hall<<elseif $settingdesc == 5>>the rooftop<<else>>the party dome<</if>>, Super $mc was waiting for them." <<button "Continue" "hero3">><</button>>

"But, there was one more mutant Super $mc hasn't seen before," I continue. "It was ten times as large as the other mutants, and ten times as ugly. Super $mc started attacking the mega-mutant, but when it seemed like $mche <<if $mcplural == true>>have <<else>>has <</if>> finally got the upper hand, the mutant would counter and predict even $mchis most powerful attacks. Super $mc was exhausted from the fight, and yet more reinforcements were coming. $mche <<if $mcweapon == 1>>shot<<elseif $mcweapon == 2>>fried<<elseif $mcweapon == 3>>clobbered<<elseif $mcweapon == 4>>teleported<<elseif $mcweapon == 5>>mind controlled<<else>>stole and absorbed<</if>> $mchis way through the lesser mutants, into the <<if $settingdesc == 1>>garage chamber<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>hangar deck<<elseif $settingdesc == 3>>escape port<<elseif $settingdesc == 4>>garage chamber<<elseif $settingdesc == 5>>garage station<<else>>underwater hangar<</if>>. But to $mchis surprise…" I pause, and let the real $mc continue. "$mcHe bumped into <<cycle "$height">> <<option "[a short]">> <<option "[a tall]">> <<option "[a Goldilock's height]">> <</cycle>> and <<cycle "$body">> <<option "[slim...]" "slim">> <<option "[athletic...]" "athletic">> <<option "[average...]" "average">> <<option "[chubby...]" "chubby">> <<option "[fat...]" "fat">> <<option "[muscular...]" "muscular">> <</cycle>> * <<link "...human named $name.\"" "hero5">><<set $race to "human">><</link>> * <<link "...elf named $name.\"" "hero5">><<set $race to "elf">><</link>> * <<link "...orc named $name.\"" "hero5">><<set $race to "orc">><</link>> * <<link "...dwarf named $name.\"" "hero5">><<set $race to "dwarf">><</link>> * <<link "...halfling named $name.\"" "hero5">><<set $race to "halfling">><</link>> * <<link "...gnome named $name.\"" "hero5">><<set $race to "gnome">><</link>> * <<link "...goblin named $name.\"" "hero5">><<set $race to "goblin">><</link>> * <<link "...vampire named $name.\"" "hero5">><<set $race to "vampire">><</link>> * <<link "...werewolf named $name.\"" "hero5">><<set $race to "werewolf">><</link>> * <<link "...fairy named $name.\"" "hero5">><<set $race to "fairy">><</link>> * <<link "...nephilim named $name.\"" "hero5">><<set $race to "nephilim">><</link>> * <<link "...cambion named $name.\"" "hero5">><<set $race to "cambion">><</link>>

"'That doesn't matter!' I continue, trying to imitate $mc's voice. 'They're almost here. Are you going to help me or not?'" "$name then picked up $his trusty <<cycle "$weapon">> <<option "[energy sword]" "energy sword">> <<option "[laser pistol]" "laser pistol">> <</cycle>> from the ground." You can tell I'm not the main character just with the amount of choices. "'Shall we?' $he said and held out $his other hand." "$mc looked back at $mchis hideout one more time. 'But what about the HQ?'" I open my mouth again, but I manage to stop myself from delivering my own line. $mc smirks when $mche notices my hesitation. "Well? I want to hear it again." ---- * <<link "\"We'll take $setting back. I promise.\"" "bed2">><</link>> * <<link "\"What about $setting? What about you?!\"" "bed2">><</link>> * <<link "\"I can't save them anymore. But I can still save you.\"" "bed2">><</link>>

"Oh! And the RV <<cycle "$settingdesc">> <<option "[has lots of hidden weapons inside it!]" 1>> <<option "[can transform into a robot!]" 2>> <<option "[can fly! And also go underwater!]" 3>> <<option "[has turbo rocket boosters that make it go super fast!]" 4>> <<option "[can turn invisible!]" 5>> <<option "[is also a time machine!]" 6>> <</cycle>>" "And it's disguised like an ice cream truck," $follower adds. "With a freezer full of ice cream!" $mc laughs at our childrens' enthusiasm. "And what is the RV called again?" And with a practiced cheer, they both answer… * <<link "\"The $mc Mobile!\"" "adv2">><<set $setting to "The $mc Mobile">><</link>> * <<link "\"The Mystery Machine!\"" "adv2">><<set $setting to "The Mystery Machine">><</link>> * <<link "\"The Rustbucket!\"" "adv2">><<set $setting to "The Rustbucket">><</link>> * <<link "\"The Speedy Beaver!\"" "adv2">><<set $setting to "The Speedy Beaver">><</link>> * <<link "\"The Trailblazer!\"" "adv2">><<set $setting to "The Trailblazer">><</link>> * <<link "Something else..." "settingtype">><<set $setting to "The RV">><</link>>

"Hyah!" $mc yells, pretending to drive $setting with $mchis hands. "Vroom, brrrmmm-brrmmm!" The twins giggle. It's moments like this, that make me realize that there's probably still people out there discovering our story the first time. "The plan seemed to be <<if $storyweapon == 7>>working," I continue, "but all that time traveling around exhausted $setting's energy. After a few minutes, the time machine was almost charged up again, but <<else>>working," I continue. "By the time ACME Corp. realized what their plan was, $setting had almost escaped. But <</if>> what $mc didn't expect, was that ACME had also developed an EMP Cannon. KABOOM! And just like that, $setting had turned into a regular old RV. The unexpected attack made $mc temporarily lose control of $setting, and crashed into a parked truck. "And then, an old decrepit minivan pulls up nearby. But to $mchis surprise…" I pause, and let the real $mc continue. "Instead of an ACME Corp. agent, <<cycle "$height">> <<option "[a short]">> <<option "[a tall]">> <<option "[a Goldilock's height]">> <</cycle>> and <<cycle "$body">> <<option "[slim...]" "slim">> <<option "[athletic...]" "athletic">> <<option "[average...]" "average">> <<option "[chubby...]" "chubby">> <<option "[fat...]" "fat">> <<option "[muscular...]" "muscular">> <</cycle>> * <<link "...human comes out of the van." "adv4">><<set $race to "human">><</link>> * <<link "...elf comes out of the van." "adv4">><<set $race to "elf">><</link>> * <<link "...orc comes out of the van." "adv4">><<set $race to "orc">><</link>> * <<link "...dwarf comes out of the van." "adv4">><<set $race to "dwarf">><</link>> * <<link "...halfling comes out of the van." "adv4">><<set $race to "halfling">><</link>> * <<link "...gnome comes out of the van." "adv4">><<set $race to "gnome">><</link>> * <<link "...goblin comes out of the van." "adv4">><<set $race to "goblin">><</link>> * <<link "...vampire comes out of the van." "adv4">><<set $race to "vampire">><</link>> * <<link "...werewolf comes out of the van." "adv4">><<set $race to "werewolf">><</link>> * <<link "...fairy comes out of the van." "adv4">><<set $race to "fairy">><</link>> * <<link "...nephilim comes out of the van." "adv4">><<set $race to "nephilim">><</link>> * <<link "...cambion comes out of the van." "adv4">><<set $race to "cambion">><</link>> It was none other than Agent $name."

<<if $settingdesc == 3>><<set _flavor to "buildings">><<set _flavor2 to "flew">><<else>><<set _flavor to "cars and people">><<set _flavor2 to "drove">><</if>><<if $mcplural == true>><<set _flavor3 to "weren't">><<else>><<set _flavor3 to "wasn't">><</if>>"Alright, so $mc lived in their RV, $setting. A life of adventure meant $mc never stayed in one place for a long time, and $mche wouldn't have it any other way, especially when $mchis mobile home <<if $settingdesc == 1>>has lots of super advanced weapons<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>can transform into a robot<<elseif $settingdesc == 3>>can also fly and go underwater<<elseif $settingdesc == 4>>can travel at the speed of sound<<elseif $settingdesc == 5>>can turn invisible<<else>>can travel through time<</if>>. "One day, $mc was celebrating $mchis birthday while exploring the The Cursed Catacombs. Legend has it, that collecting all six of MacGuffin's lost artifacts would lead you to a long forgotten city made of gold. Of course, there was no better birthday present than solving puzzles, disarming booby traps, and hunting the third lost artifact." "Wait, you found two artifacts already, $mcparent?" $leader asks. "That seems too easy." "But nothing was ever that simple. The ACME Corp. agents have caught up to $mchim, and they want to steal the artifacts for themselves." "They're just angry they weren't invited to your birthday." $follower giggles. "$mc knew they were coming, so $mche used $mchis knowledge of the ancient machines and traps, and soon, arrows were flying, snakes were crawling, and boulders were rolling towards the helpless agents." "$mc finally escaped the catacombs, but the chase wasn't over yet. $mche hopped in the RVm and <<if $settingdesc == 1>>starts charging $setting's super weapons<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>starts $setting's transformation sequence<<elseif $settingdesc == 3>>starts preparing $setting to fly<<elseif $settingdesc == 4>>starts preparing $setting's rocket boosters<<elseif $settingdesc == 5>>starts preparing $setting's cloaking device<<else>>starts preparing $setting's time machine<</if>>. ACME Corp. was prepared this time, however, and each of the vehicles in their convoy <<if $settingdesc == 1>>had their own weapons as well<<elseif $settingdesc == 2>>can also transform into a robot and combine into a bigger one<<elseif $settingdesc == 3>>can also fly and go underwater<<elseif $settingdesc == 4>>can also go supersonic<<elseif $settingdesc == 5>>can track $setting even while invisible<<else>>can also time travel<</if>>." "That's unfair!" $follower exclaims. "Of course, $mc wasn't giving up without a fight. $mche... * <<link "...tricked them into hitting each other.\"" "adv3">><<set $storyweapon to 1>><</link>> * <<link "...drove normally and pretend $mche _flavor3 being chased.\"" "adv3">><<set $storyweapon to 2>><</link>> * <<link "...went to an area with lots of _flavor so they couldn't follow $mchim.\"" "adv3">><<set $storyweapon to 3>><</link>> * <<link "..._flavor2 around the city until $mche lost them.\"" "adv3">><<set $storyweapon to 4>><</link>> * <<link "...disguised $setting so that it looks like ACME Corp. and went the other way.\"" "adv3">><<set $storyweapon to 5>><</link>> * <<link "...pretended to give away the artifact and gave them a fake replica instead.\"" "adv3">><<set $storyweapon to 6>><</link>> <<if $settingdesc == 6>> * <<link "...kept time traveling and tried to lose them.\"" "adv3">><<set $storyweapon to 7>><</link>><</if>>

"$mc raised $mchis <<cycle "$mcweapon">> <<option "[silenced pistol]" 1>> <<option "[shotgun]" 2>> <<option "[crossbow]" 3>> <<option "[shovel]" 4>> <<option "[whip]" 5>> <<option "[machete]" 6>> <</cycle>> at the stranger." 'Who are you?'" I glance at $mc, perfectly remembering the look on $mchis face. "And immediately, $mche realized that the fine-looking stranger couldn't be one of the bad guys if $he—" "Hey, I don't remember that being part of the story!" I glance at our children with a grin. "But it's true." $mc rolls $mchis eyes. "$name <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[looked up]">> <<option "[looked down]">> <<option "[looked straight]">> <</cycle>> at $mc's $mceyecolor eyes, and… * <<link "...turned away silently. $mche could tell that the fine-looking stranger tended to be more quiet and reserved.\"" "adv5">><<set $introvert to true>><</link>> * <<link "...smiled. 'I was just about to ask you the same thing.' $mche could tell that the fine-looking stranger was social and outgoing.\"" "adv5">><<set $introvert to false>><</link>>

"'That doesn't matter!' I continue, trying to imitate $mc's voice. 'ACME Corp. is almost here. Are you going to help me or not?'" "'Hop in.' $name opens the door to $his minivan, and checks the GPS on $his watch as $he pulls out $his trusty <<cycle "$weapon">> <<option "[retractable sword]" "retractable sword">> <<option "[silenced pistols]" "silenced pistols">> <</cycle>>." You can tell I'm not the main character just with the amount of choices. "$mc looked back at $mchis mobile home one more time. 'But what about my RV?'" I open my mouth again, but I manage to stop myself from delivering my own line. $mc smirks when $mche notices my hesitation. "Well? I want to hear it again." ---- * <<link "\"We'll take $setting back. I promise.\"" "bed2">><</link>> * <<link "\"What about $setting? What about you?!\"" "bed2">><</link>> * <<link "\"I can't save them anymore. But I can still save you.\"" "bed2">><</link>>

<<cacheaudio "stay" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/krje1jm7jfo33kt/staythecourse_km.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "soft">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> <<set $chapter to "Book 2, Chapter 5">> !$title !!Book 2, Chapter 5 <<timed 2s t8n>> "Yes, don't worry. Your pet dragon is safe." Just as we get inside, we spot D carrying two children from the school bus—one on each arm. On his left is a little boy, and on his right is a chubby little girl, quietly enjoying a pink popsicle. They're probably around eight or nine year old humans, if I had to guess. And from their slightly tattered clothing and messy hair, I doubt they have taken any baths recently. "Ooh, you said you're a vampire?" the curly-haired boy says just as D takes them inside a room. "Does that mean you can turn into a bat? Do you know Batman?" Jessica glances at the stuffed toys she's holding, as it starts to sink in for both of us. D comes back out a moment later with a pained smile. "Not sure if I should be glad or not, but… the anomalies are all children, $name. All of them." They sigh. "Phyrnne's right. They don't even know they're anomalies." "Oh my gosh! I… I shot missiles at a bunch of kids!" ---- * <<link "\"It's okay, Jess. None of us knew.\"" "cliff2">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Relax, Jess. They almost killed us too.\"" "cliff2">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"This is all messed up. I think I'm gonna need Phyrnne's services sooner rather than later...\"" "cliff2">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> * <<link "\"Hey D, where did you get that popsicle you gave to the girl?\"" "cliff2">><<set $text to 4>><</link>> * <<link "\I massage my temples. \"They're all children and they gave us that much trouble?\"" "cliff2">><<set $text to 5>><</link>> <</timed>>

<<if $text == 4>>"What? Oh. Her name's Rosie. She actually made it herself." D pulls out a pink paintbrush from their pocket and catches it after a spin, then waves it around. "She had a magic paintbrush that let her create those giant fans and shields. I asked her to show me how it works, so she made herself a popsicle. Doesn't seem to work when I try though." "Maybe Rnst'll know how it works." Jessica eases off a little. "I could use one after that fight too, honestly." <<elseif $text == 5>> "They're legit worse than most of the other anomalies we've fought," D says. "I can believe it," I say.<<else>> "It's okay. I'll manage… This is far from the worst thing I've ever done… We've ever done…"<</if>> D tries to lift the mood with a chuckle. "You should go talk to them. The boy wanted me to try feeding on him when I told him my bite was actually soothing and calming." Jessica picks up a sealed transparent container near the hangar, and puts the stuffed toys inside. "Don't tell me you actually did." "It was tempting… but nah." They sigh. "Man, we'd be a laughing stock if any of the other squads ever hear we had trouble fighting a bunch'a kids." "Don't forget Scylla, the jabberwock, and the flying $animals with $elemental breath," I say, looking through one of the windows where Rnst is talking to a boy and a girl in restraints. "So what're we going to do now? Wipe their memories or put them in the Children Protagonists' Orphanage?" "Well, we need to interrogate them first," Jessica says. "We might not even need to do wipe their memories if they cooperate." D <<if $text == 4>>tucks the paintbrush back in their pocket<<else>>gives me a couple taps on my shoulder<</if>>. "At least we'll be able to help you find out what happened in your world after this." ---- * <<link "\"Let's hope so...\"" "cliff3">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"I hope the anomalies responsible for them aren't as much of a headache.\"" "cliff3">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Wait a sec. Jess, you think you can modify that school bus to be CANon worthy?\"" "cliff3">><<set $text to 3>><</link>>

<<if $text == 2>>D smirks and crosses their arms. "Watch it be the easiest mission ever."<<elseif $text == 3>>"That would be…" She smiles and flexes the fingers on her bionic arm. "I'll see what Lorem and I can do." <</if>> Rnst comes out of the room, carrying three hamsterballs. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Hayden found these three blind mice inside the Nautilus. It's why Lorem's systems were shutting down.</div> "Oh, right." Jessica scratches her head. "I'll… I'll see what I can do to prevent another mice problem in the future." <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST (whispers) Better keep these mice out of Lorem's reach. I think the chubby girl's looking for them.</div> "We're inside a ship?" one of the mice talks—and I'm pretty sure this isn't the Babel worm translating them. "Hickory, I thought we were in a school bus?" "I thought we were still inside Tommy, Dickory!" "H-wat? What did you two say?" ---- * <<link "\"Ooh, can I pet them?\"" "cliff4">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Ugh, get them away from me.\"" "cliff4">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Y'know, I think the squad needs a team pet or a mascot.\"" "cliff4">><<set $text to 3>><</link>>

<<if $text == 2>><div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST They're anomalies, $name. But… maybe later.</div> "They do look kinda cute," Jessica says.<<elseif $text == 3>>D bursts into laughter. "We… actually tried it a few times already, but so far all of them tried to attack Hayden." That's a bummer.<</if>> <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Anyway, these two children over here are giving me a bit of trouble. I confiscated the pendants they're wearing since they seem to be magical, but they're not cooperating. Want to try interrogating them, $name? They might be more responsive to an actual parent.</div> "This is the problem with you guys." D rolls their eyes. "Maybe if you stopped calling it an interrogation, they'll cooperate more." ---- * <<link "\"I dunno... It feels bad interrogating children, but I'll try.\"" "cliff5">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\'I'll do it.\" This is part of the job too, and I need the experience." "cliff5">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Sure. Let's call it playing twenty questions then.\"" "cliff5">><<set $text to 3>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>"It's not that bad dude. You'll do it on your kids too when they become teenagers,"<<elseif $text == 2>>"Good luck,"<<else>>"That's a good idea,"<</if>> D says. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST I advise taking someone else with you just in case. Who knows what else those brats can do.</div> Well, in that case… "I'll go with... * <<link "...Hayden?\"" "cliff6">><<set $partner to "Hayden">><</link>> * <<link "...Jessica?\"" "cliff6">><<set $partner to "Jessica">><</link>> * <<link "...Phyrnne?\"" "cliff6">><<set $partner to "Phyrnne">><</link>> * <<link "...D?\"" "cliff6">><<set $partner to "D">><</link>> * <<link "...Rnst?\"" "cliff6">><<set $partner to "Rnst">><</link>> * <<link "...Lorem?\"" "cliff6">><<set $partner to "Lorem">><</link>>

<<if $partner == "Hayden">>We hear a flushing noise through the comms and everyone breaks into a chuckle. "What the—" There's a bunch of static. "—sorry, you weren't supposed to hear that. Hold on." Hayden appears from his quarters two minutes later, back in his usual lab coat. "It appears I'm needed?" "Yeah," I say. "Those two children over there aren't cooperating. I was thinking you'd accompany me?" He glances at our other squadmates. "I'm not sure why you'd pick me when there are much better candidates here, but alright."<<elseif $partner == "Jessica">>"Sure, but wait—Lorem?" <<type 20ms>>"What is it this time, Jess?"<</type>> "How bad is the damage on The Nautilus?" <<type 20ms>>"Nothing you can't fix, honey."<</type>> "Alright, then," Jessica says. "Lorem doesn't seem to be in a very bad mood so I guess the repairs can wait a little longer."<<elseif $partner == "Phyrnne">>"Wait a second, sweetie," I hear Phyrnne through the comms. "Looks like I am needed somewhere else. I will come back later, okay?" She phases through the wall to meet me. "What was that again? Sorry, I am talking to one of the children. One of them is an empath, and… oh my, even I am overwhelmed…" "Those two children over there aren't cooperating. I was thinking you'd accompany me? Since you can detect whether someone's lying and all that." "Sure, $name. I do not mind."<<elseif $partner == "D">>D chuckles. "I knew you'd pick me." "And what makes you say that?" I ask. "Well, I'm pretty popular with the kids. Well, not teenagers, maybe, but they don't seem to be teens yet." "You're hopeless, you know that?" Jessica says.<<elseif $partner == "Rnst">><div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Me? I just told you they didn't want to cooperate with me.</div> "Well, you can tell me what you've already tried. And besides, I'll be there with you now, right? Come on." <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST (takes a deep breath) Hopefully they didn't hate me too much then.</div><<else>><<type 20ms>>"Aww, aren't you a cutie? As much as I want to babysit you, I'm currently busy surveying the planet for further assessment." And then a moment later, Lorem adds, "Addendum: Bonding time with $name has been scheduled for tomorrow."<</type>> Everyone suddenly breaks into smiles and suppressed giggles. Oh no. Guess I'm going to find out what that means later… <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Well, looks like you'll have to pick someone else.</div><</if>> ---- <<if $partner == "Lorem">> * <<link "...Hayden?\"" "cliff6">><<set $partner to "Hayden">><</link>> * <<link "...Jessica?\"" "cliff6">><<set $partner to "Jessica">><</link>> * <<link "...Phyrnne?\"" "cliff6">><<set $partner to "Phyrnne">><</link>> * <<link "...D?\"" "cliff6">><<set $partner to "D">><</link>> * <<link "...Rnst?\"" "cliff6">><<set $partner to "Rnst">><</link>> <<else>> * <<link "I'll go ahead and enter." "cliff7">><</link>> * <<link "I'll let $partner enter the room first." "cliff7">><</link>> <</if>>

<<cacheaudio "love" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/5rru29p4qpnea6h/touchoflove_f.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "stay">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> "What do you want now?" the little girl greets me as soon as I enter, struggling her $twinbody arms against the restraints on the chair she's on. <<if $partner == "Rnst">><div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST We just want to know your names.</div><<else>>"We just want to know your names," $partner asks.<</if>> "And then what?" <<if $partner == "Rnst">><div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST We need to know your names so we can help you. You're all lost, am I correct?</div><<else>>"We need to know your names so we can help you," $partner replies. "You're all lost, am I correct?"<</if>> The girl nods reluctantly, but stays quiet. "Let me try something else," I say, sitting on a chair in front of them. "We're not gonna hurt you, okay? We just need some information, like where your parents are. We can't take you home if you don't tell us." <<button "Continue" "cliff8">><</button>>

"We don't have parents anymore," the boy whispers. The girl glares at the boy, or her brother, it seems like, before shaking her head. "We don't know! That's why we're trying to look for them!" "And?" I continue. "How old are you?" "We're twenty-four," the boy says. <<if $partner == "Rnst">><div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Are you both twelve then? Or are you eleven and thirteen?</div><<else>>"Are you both twelve then? Or are you eleven and thirteen?" $partner asks.<</if>> The boy looks to the side. "We're… we're both twelve." "And where are you two from?" The boy glances at his sister. "…We're from Lung—" "No. <<if $genre == 8>>We're not from anywhere exactly. We actually used to travel around in an RV," the girl says with a determined look. My heart jumps. It's possible that they came from an adventure world like me. Maybe something similar happened to $mc and our children.<<else>>We're from $setting," the girl says with a determined look. My heart jumps. These kids must've went missing too, along with $mc and our children. It's possible that they're lost in another world.<</if>> <<button "Continue" "cliff9">><</button>>

I let out a sigh of relief and smile. "Don't worry. I'm from there too." They look at each other, surprised. "Oh yeah? Then prove it," the boy says. "I will… if you tell us your names," I reply back. <<if $leader == "$boynn">>The boy looks at the floor for a moment, before looking back up at me with his $mceyecolor eyes, as he brushes off a stray $mchaircolor hair from his face.<<else>>The girl looks at the floor for a moment, before looking back up at me with her $mceyecolor eyes, as she brushes off a stray $mchaircolor hair from her face.<</if>> "Will you give our stuffed toys and our lockets back if we tell you?" ---- * <<link "\"Yes.\"" "cliff10">><</link>> * <<link "\"Yup.\"" "cliff10">><</link>> * <<link "\"Okay.\"" "cliff10">><</link>> * <<link "\"Alright.\"" "cliff10">><</link>> * <<link "\"I promise.\"" "cliff10">><</link>> * <<link "\"I'll even give you a hug if you do.\"" "cliff10">><</link>> * <<link "I smile and give them a thumbs up." "cliff10">><</link>> * <<link "Of course we won't, but I give the girl a firm nod anyway." "cliff10">><</link>>

My mind starts racing with questions and possibilities. <<timed 2s t8n>>What happened to my world...<</timed>> <<timed 4s t8n>>What happened to $mc...<</timed>> <<timed 6s t8n>>the kids...<</timed>> <<timed 8s t8n>>the villains...<</timed>> <<timed 10s t8n>><<linkreplace "Are we even doing the right thing?">>Are we even doing the right thing? <<if $leader == "$boynn">>And then, the little boy looks straight into me with a big smile. <<timed 3s t8n>><<type 100ms>>"I'm $boynn, and this is my twin sister, $girlnn."<</type>><</timed>> <<else>>And then, the little girl looks straight into me with a big smile. <<timed 3s t8n>><<type 100ms>>"I'm $girlnn, and this is my twin brother, $boynn."<</type>><</timed>><</if>><<timed 10s t8n>><<button "Continue" "end1">><</button>><</timed>> <</linkreplace>><</timed>>

<<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "love">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> <<set $chapter to "To Be Continued">> <<type 100ms>> !!TO BE CONTINUED…<</type>> <<timed 3s t8n>>But wait, <<timed 3s t8n>>[[isn't there a follow-up story?|end2]]<</timed>><</timed>>

First off, I hope you enjoyed playing In Auctorem Credimus! <<timed 2s t8n>>I wrote In Auctorem Credimus as a "sidequel" to my main project, which I'm planning to turn into a visual novel. If you enjoyed the story and you're curious about how $boynn and $girlnn became anomalies in the first place... <<linkreplace "Please check out my other project!">> <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px"><img src="https://aws1.discourse-cdn.com/choiceofgames/original/3X/6/9/693d1d00a2db6420d437aad2679a96eb2f0d3b82.gif"></div> !!!Dear Diary, We Created a Plot Hole! is an interactive slice-of-life fantasy adventure story. !!!Summary The day after you and your twin sibling rewrote your mother's unfinished bedtime story, you quickly find out why she never finished it. You have unleashed a plot hole—a portal to different story worlds—and now the villains from the stories you've written have become real. They're here to crash your school fieldtrip, and they're here to finish your mother's story for good. Grab your plot armor and join your twin and friends in a meta-fictional adventure! Explore different story worlds—from fantasy and sci-fi, to mythology and mystery. Will you discover the truth behind your mother’s story? Or will villains, plot twists, and character development prevent you from getting your happily ever after? !!You can play <a href="https://dashingdon.com/play/franzinyte/dear-diary-we-created-a-plot-hole/mygame/" target="_blank">the demo here!</a> !!!!If you have the time, please answer the <a href="https://forms.gle/vgbxzZEjJuXSLH8y5" target="_blank">IAC Survey</a> too! This may influence how your MC will appear in Dear Diary, We Created a Plot Hole! !!!!Follow the <a href="https://in-auctorem-credimus-if.tumblr.com/" target="_blank">In Auctorem Credimus</a> blog !!!!Follow the <a href="https://ddwcaph-game.tumblr.com/" target="_blank">Dear Diary, We Created a Plot Hole!</a> blog !!!!Join the <a href="https://discord.gg/UYCXYh8Ysd" target="_blank">Discord Server!</a> <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">Thank you for playing! ❤️ And always remember, ''In Auctorem Credimus''.</div> <</linkreplace>> <</timed>>

I'm… mentally tired to describe a whole packing montage right now, but come on, I can't leave the part where I choose one last personal possession to bring. ---- * <<link "A picture of my family." "bed7">><</link>> * <<link "A personal copy of $title to reread." "bed7">><</link>> * <<link "My favorite stuffed toy." "bed7">><</link>> * <<link "My favorite blanket." "bed7">><</link>> * <<link "A bunch of books from my neverending to-read list." "bed7">><</link>> * <<link "My video camera." "bed7">><</link>> * <<link "My swimsuit." "bed7">><</link>> * <<link "A cookbook. You'll never know when it'll come in handy." "bed7">><</link>> * <<link "You know what, I'm done packing for today." "bed7">><</link>>

And as if on cue, I yawn just as I finish packing. I stretch for a bit, but for some reason, $mc's out-of-character moment is still bothering me. $mc has never been that worried before, unless… <<timed 5s t8n>> $mcHe <<if $mcplural == true>>know <<else>>knows <</if>> something about our sequel. Well, it's probably best not to pry anymore then. I stretch once more and <<linkreplace "start my nightly routine.">>start my nightly routine. One shower, toothbrush, and changing into <<cycle "$nighties">> <<option "[my pyjamas]" "PJs">> <<option "[my nightgown]" "nightgown">> <</cycle>> later, the siren call of the bed is finally too strong to resist. <<if $race == "vampire">>I don't really need sleep as a vampire, but nothing beats a good night's rest.<</if>> I set my trusty alarm clock, and… * <<link "...invite $mc for some fun before I leave. The story's over. Let's make it fade to black." "canon1">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> <<if $ex == true>> * <<link "On second thought, the kids might hear. Let's just sleep." "canon1">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> <<else>> * <<link "Why am I even thinking about that? We're not married anymore." "canon1">><<set $text to 2>><</link>><</if>> * <<link "Why am I even thinking about that? I've never been interested in the least." "canon1">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> <</linkreplace>> <</timed>>

<<cacheaudio "unsolved" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/noart5g29pnyq4y/theunsolvedmurder_f.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "omw">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> <<set $chapter to "Book 2, Prologue?">><<linkreplace "<<if $text == 1>>I'm sure you can imagine the rest. There's plenty of other stories for that.<<else>>Within minutes, sleep takes me...<</if>>">> !$title !!Book 2, Prologue? <<timed 2s t8n>> The sun is bright. The background music is all positive and catchy, the birds are chirping, and— The sun is bright? Oh no. It's 9AM. ---- * <<link "What ever happened to me being a morning person?" "canon2">><</link>> * <<link "I know I'm not a morning person at all... but 9AM? I'm beyond late." "canon2">><</link>> <</timed>> <</linkreplace>>

Why didn't anyone wake me up? I'm pretty sure $boynn and $girlnn would be jumping in my bed trying to wake me up by now. Surely we all didn't sleep that long, right? Or… is my hunch right all along? Could this finally be the day I've been waiting for? ---- * <<link "I need to get up." "canon3">><<set $glasses to false>><<set $hearingaids to false>><</link>> * <<link "But first, my eyeglasses." "canon3">><<set $glasses to true>><<set $hearingaids to false>><</link>> * <<link "But first, my hearing aids." "canon3">><<set $glasses to false>><<set $hearingaids to true>><</link>> * <<link "Actually, I grab both my eyeglasses and hearing aids." "canon3">><<set $glasses to true>><<set $hearingaids to true>><</link>>

I look <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[at my hands]">> <<option "[at the clock]">> <<option "[at my hands once more]">> <</cycle>>—and then pinch myself for good measure. Nope. Definitely not dreaming. I rush out of my room, only to be greeted with more silence. It's too silent, in fact. <<if$genre == 5>>I'm used to this, of course. I've been living with spirits and other supernaturals my whole life. <<else>>Don't tell me our story suddenly changed genres.<</if>> ---- * <<link "\"$mc?\"" "canon4">><</link>> * <<link "\"$boynn? $girlnn!\"" "canon4">><</link>>

<<cacheaudio "local" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/w55mwgtccs07x8z/localforecastslower_km.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "unsolved">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> No answer. I call out once more, but there's only the sound of my footsteps. My footsteps, and my now increasing heartbeat. Even the background music is gone. It's not my <<if $ex == true>>birthday, so that can't be it either.<<else>>birthday or our anniversary, so that can't be it either.<</if>> No, not that one either. And don't tell $mc that it took me a moment to be sure. Well, whatever's happening, there's only one way to find out. I inhale, exhale, and <<linkreplace "open the door to our children's room.">>open the door to our children's room. I open it slowly, just in case they're still sleeping, but the creaking has only made the deafening silence eerier. <<timed 3s t8n>>They're not here. They're not on the living room. Or the kitchen. Or the roof. <<button "They're gone." "canon5">><</button>> <</timed>> <</linkreplace>>

Maybe they just had to leave for something? But then why wouldn't they wake me up? I start looking around the kids' bedroom for clues, but it's like they just vanished. Everything's still there, except for our copy of $title. I come back to my room to fetch my phone, and start dialing $mc. <<cycle "$temp" once>> <<option "[Wait...]">> <<option "[Wait a little more...]">> <<option "[Try one more time?]">> <</cycle>> But there's no one answering. I try dialing my friends, but there's nothing. My family, but there's nothing. I even try contacting the villains—we sort of keep each other updated from time to time for any sequel news—but there's nothing. This… this can't be right. This can't be the sequel. <<linkreplace "It can't be.">>It can't be. Well, there's no sense waiting in here. I better go see what's happening outside. ---- * <<link "But first, I need to get dressed." "wearclothes">><<set $clothes to "casual">><</link>> * <<link "You know what? Screw this. I'm going outside in my $nighties." "canon6">><<set $clothes to "nighties">><</link>> <</linkreplace>>

I take a quick look at the mirror, and brush off the sleepy dust in my eyes. But right now, I don't have the liberty to admire and describe <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[myself]">> <<option "[my tattoos]">> <<option "[my piercings]">> <<option "[myself and all my tattoos and piercings]">> <</cycle>> to the reader. If this is the sequel, you already know what I look like anyway. It's not like it's plot-relevant. <<if $genre == 1>>I head out of the castle and take a quick look around $setting.<<elseif $genre == 2>>I head out of our new home and take a quick look around $setting.<<elseif $genre == 3>>I head out of our home and take a quick look around the new colony we've settled on.<<elseif $genre == 4>>I head out of our home and take a quick look around $setting.<<elseif $genre == 5>>I head out of our new home and take a quick look around $setting.<<elseif $genre == 6>>I head out of our new home and take a quick look around $setting.<<elseif $genre == 7>>I head out of our new HQ and take a quick look around the city.<<else>>I head out of our new resthouse and take a quick look around the city in $setting.<</if>> It looks relatively normal out here, at least. Maybe one of our neighbors has seen $mc? ---- * <<link "Talk to the old lady, Alice." "canon7">><<set $neighbor to "Alice">><</link>> * <<link "Talk to the middle-aged man, Bob." "canon7">><<set $neighbor to "Bob">><</link>>

I can't leave home without my plot armor, after all. And by plot armor, I mean, something... * <<link "...comfortable and casual." "canon6">><</link>> * <<link "...fancy and elegant." "canon6">><</link>> * <<link "...fun and colorful." "canon6">><</link>> * <<link "...dark and imposing" "canon6">><</link>> * <<link "...athletic and practical." "canon6">><</link>> * <<link "...modest and simple." "canon6">><</link>> * <<link "...daring and revealing." "canon6">><</link>>

<<if $introvert == true>>I rehearse my lines a little before approaching. I don't really know them as well as they know about me. <<else>>I put on my best smile and approach them.<</if>> "Hey," I say, trying to sound casual. "Have you seen $mc or our children?" $neighbor <<if $clothes == "nighties">>looks a little taken aback upon seeing my outfit, <<else>>squints<</if>> and shakes their head. "$mc? $mc... Nah, can't say I have. Are you new to this neighborhood? I've never seen you before." ---- * <<link "My heart sinks." "canon8">><</link>> * <<link "This has to be a dream!" "canon8">><</link>> * <<link "Great. Now the whole cast is in on this prank. It's not funny anymore." "canon8">><</link>> * <<link "Well, there has to be an explanation for this." "canon8">><</link>>

I walk around a little more, but the usual greetings I receive from everyone has now been replaced with smiles, waves, and polite nods. <<if $clothes == "nighties">> And maybe the occasional confusion that I didn't bother to change clothes.<</if>> <<linkreplace "This has just gone from bad to worse.">>This has just gone from bad to worse. I take a sit on a nearby bench, and my head starts spinning. ---- * <<link "Tears start forming in my eyes. This can't be happening." "canon9">><<set $emotional to true>><</link>> * <<link "I hold back the tears. I can't give up just yet." "canon9">><<set $emotional to false>><</link>> * <<link "Please, I've faced things worse than this." "canon9">><<set $emotional to false>><</link>> <</linkreplace>>

At this point, my only chance of figuring this out is to pay a visit to the villains. It'll be a long trip, but I'm already packed for a longer trip anyway. With a sigh, I turn back towards the house, and—bump into someone else. Not unlike the first time I bumped into $mc. <<linkreplace "\"Wait, $mc?\"">>"Wait, $mc?" But unless my eyes are lying, that's definitely not $mc. No, that's the one who double crossed us. How could I ever forget the face of who betrayed us? "$name?" And in an ironic twist of fate, am I glad to hear my name come out from their mouth. "Wait, you know me?" "No… Don't tell me you don't recognize me too." "What? No. You're… * <<link "...Charlie, right?" "canon10">><<set $traitor to "Charlie">><</link>> * <<link "...Jackie, right?" "canon10">><<set $traitor to "Jackie">><</link>> <</linkreplace>>

"Holy pooptarts! It's you! Ha—haaa! It's really you!" "Don't push it," I say, trying my best to hide my expression. "Do you know what's going on? Are we in the sequel?" "I don't think so. I thought I was losing my mind. No one else recognizes me. And the <<if $genre == 1>>Dark Lord<<elseif $genre == 2>>Fairy King<<elseif $genre == 3>>other aliens<<elseif $genre == 4>>other demigods<<elseif $genre == 5>>other supernaturals<<elseif $genre == 6>>mafia<<elseif $genre == 7>>other supervillains<<else>>my former ACME Corp. friends<</if>> are missing as well." Yup, that's definitely not a coincidence. "$mc's gone too, <<if $mcplural == true>>aren't they?<<else>>isn't $mche?<</if>>" <<linkreplace "I can only nod.">>I can only nod. "So, now what? Are we the new main characters? That doesn't even make any sense." "I sure hope not. I wouldn't want to bear the pressure of being the main character. No thank you." "Well, any ideas?" "Aren't you an anthropologist?" I look at $traitor flatly. "Biblioanthropologist. They're very different things." "Whatever. Can't you… do something?" "Well, I'm supposed to head to CANon anyway. Maybe they know what happened." <<button "Continue" "canon11">><</button>> <</linkreplace>>

"Good luck then. Love the outfit, by the way." <<if $clothes == "nighties">>I almost say thanks before I realize that I'm still wearing my $nighties.<</if>> "Wait, aren't you going with me?" "You go ahead. I'll see if I can find more people who recognize us. You still got my number?" "I deleted it, remember?" "Look, I'd love to help you, but even if I've changed, that'd be very out of character for me." * <<link "\"I understand.\"" "canon12">><</link>> * <<link "\"Thanks for nothing.\"" "canon12">><</link>> * <<link "\"Then you haven't changed at all.\"" "canon12">><</link>> * <<link "\"Who cares about being in-character right now?\"" "canon12">><</link>>

I grab my luggage, and head towards LiteraTours Travel Agency. It's not too far from here, thankfully, so I decide to just take a stroll <<if $genre == 8>>instead of driving $setting<<else>>instead<</if>>. The travel agency is just a front organization for CANon, of course. After our story ended, $mc and I traveled to many different places. Some trips we just wanted to relax and have fun, while some were more of a... 'tying up loose ends our author forgot' kind of fun. And that was when $mc found out about The Custodians of Authorial Narrative Foundation. CANon is more or less, an inter-literary intelligence agency and police force. They're here to make sure that all characters stay in-character, the plot holes are fixed, and the stories end the way they're meant to. $mc invited me to join shortly after, and since we were bored waiting around for our sequel, we decided to join CANon as biblioanthropologists, so we can continue our adventuring, while helping and learning about new tropes in the process. It always helps being genre savvy. And, finally, after three paragraphs worth of infodumps, I reach the travel agency. I take a deep breath, and <<link "open the doors." "canon12.5">><</link>>

<<cacheaudio "squid" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/31ik0rndpu0yco2/devilssquidgame_f.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "local">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> "I'm sorry..." The receptionist tries to suppress her giggle with the purple knitted shawl she's wearing. "I just can't get over how our motto sounds like a magic spell." <<if $introvert == true>><<set _flavor to "Small talk sucks.">>I nod and chuckle.<<else>><<set _flavor to "I'd normally make small talk, but I'm on edge right now.">>"Oh wow, you're right."<</if>> Great, now I can't unthink that anymore. "Please, follow me." She starts guiding me towards an employees-only elevator, where she presses a bunch of coded inputs on the elevator buttons. <<if $race == "vampire">>Her eyes widen knowingly when my reflection doesn't appear with hers on the elevator doors, but she doesn't say anything else.<<else>>I look at our blurry reflections on the elevator doors as we wait for them to part.<</if>> ---- * <<link "\"Thank you.\"" "canon14">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"So... how's work today?\"" "canon14">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Hey, that's a nice shawl.\"" "canon14">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> * <<link "\"Heard anything interesting around CANon lately?\"" "canon14">><<set $text to 4>><</link>> * <<link "_flavor" "canon14">><<set $text to 5>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>"You're welcome," she replies. "I hope your day goes well. You know how leap days usually go." "Oh, I only joined just after the last one, so I actually don't have any idea." "My first one was unforgettable."<<elseif $text == 2>>"We're a little short-staffed at the moment, but you know how leap days usually go." "I only joined just after the last one, so I actually don't have any idea." "I hope it goes smoothly for you then."<<elseif $text == 3>>She looks away without turning her head and chuckles as she twirls her fingers on the shawl's fringes. "I'd say thank you, but this was actually a gift from my co-worker. He knitted it himself." "Oh. That's really sweet."<<elseif $text == 4>>"Oh, just the usual gossip. But there'll be a lot more interesting leap day stories going around tomorrow." "I only joined just after the last one, so I actually don't have any idea." "I hope it goes smoothly for you then."<<else>>I just wait with her patiently.<</if>> And then my belly decides to rumble—an embarrassing reminder that I haven't <<if $race == "vampire">>drank any blood <<else>>eaten anything<</if>> since yesterday. And then it decides to do a quick aftershock out of spite. The elevator finally pities me, and dings to save me from further awkwardness from my belly. For a fancy elevator that connects all the branches of LiteraTours across the multiverses, you'd think they'd have solved the long elevator waits by now. Or maybe this meeting was somehow necessary, and the elevator is a wizard—it only arrives precisely when it means to. She taps in a finger on the fingerprint scanner, and the elevator door finally opens. "Do you need further assistance?" "What floor can I find the TARDep?" I ask. I've never had a reason to visit it before. "The thirteenth. You can access it by pressing the 'one' and 'three' buttons simultaneously. Anything else?" "That's all, thanks." "Have a good day!" She gives me a smiling nod, and leaves. I don't know why, but her voice seems familiar for some reason, like I've already met her before. Have I lost some of my memory too? Well, she's already talking to someone else. It's too late to ask her now. My belly rumbles again, so I take a quick detour to the food court on the 4th floor, and grab <<if $race == "vampire">> a quick blood pack to refresh myself.<<else>><<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[something sweet]">> <<option "[something savory]">> <<option "[something spicy]">> <</cycle>> to appease my belly.<</if>> With that taken care of, I head to the elevators once more. [[It's time to visit the forbidden floor.|canon15]]

The elevator opens. It's impossible not to notice the large illuminated carvings eerily glowing a shade of canon-blue saying... <<timed 5s t8n>><<type 60ms>>!!TIMELINE ANOMALY REMOVAL DEPARTMENT<</type>><</timed>> <<timed 9s t8n>>What I didn't expect is the huge line. Of people. Waiting. Orcs, elves, fairies, and eldritch entitites, all waiting for their turn at the waiting benches. It's like a cosplay convention, only it's real, and no one is happy about being here. ---- * <<link "I'm not sure whether to feel better or not." "canon16">><</link>> * <<link "At least our story world is not the only one with anomalies, right?" "canon16">><</link>> * <<link "This is much worse! Who knows just how much stories are affected?" "canon16">><</link>> * <<link "Well, there's all sorts of people here. I'm sure I'll find someone interesting to pass the time with..." "canon16">><</link>> * <<link "This is hopeless. There must be a better way than just waiting all day." "canon16">><</link>> * <<link "I just hope $mc, $boynn, and $girlnn are okay..." "canon16">><</link>> <</timed>>

Just as I'm about to look for someplace to sit, my phone rings. I half-expected it to be $mc or $traitor, but it's one of my bestfriends at work, Milana. "$name! Thank goodness, we finally got to contact you. I'm guessing you're at the TARDep too, huh?" Milana guides me to the waiting room where the rest of our ensemble cast is, except it's not much of a consolation... judging from the faces of the xenoarchaeologists and my fellow biblioanthropologists. "$name!" Milana greets. "You finally made it!" Everyone else gives me a sleepy smile, an unenthusiastic nod, or a half-hearted wave. I guess that's the mood for today. I take the seat that's obviously reserved for me, pull my luggage close, and [[let out a breath I'm half-aware of holding.|canon16.5]]

A woman wearing a blue headscarf finally comes out of the office and greets us with a weary smile… "Finally! Any news about the hold up?" "The story world you're all assigned to had some… unexpected crossovers. Our TARDIS squads are working overtime to fix the new influx of anomalies, but I'm afraid that this will be solved in about six business days." Everyone groans in disappointment. And then complaints start erupting from every direction. "That's horsehockey! What are we supposed to do then?" I sigh. This is probably the worst day next to having our story end, and it's not even over yet. <<button "Continue" "canon18">><</button>>

As everyone around me devolves into arguments with the poor receptionist, the Timeline Anomaly Removal Department Intervention Squad poster on the wall catches my attention. The poster boasts a party straight out from an RPG—a dwarf mage, a demon paladin, an orc detective, a dragon princess, and a goldfish inside a robot—walking into a bar, as they point their weapons at a zombified Romeo and a Juliet android. Below that is of course the words, "Who ya gonna call?" You know, ever since then, I've been waiting for a sequel to my story. But seeing all these people, waiting for their turn to have the plot holes in their stories fixed… it's making me realize that maybe I'm being a little selfish. <<linkreplace "No, I don't want a sequel.">>No, I don't want a sequel. //I just want to save the world again.// <<timed 2s t8n>>And with $mc gone, maybe it's my turn to repay the favor. I take a deep breath, and stand up. <<link "\"Guys? I think I know how to solve our problem.\"" "canon19">><</link>><</timed>> <</linkreplace>>

<<type 30ms>>"Instead of waiting, why don't we join the TARDIS?"<</type>> <<timed 3s t8n>>Everyone stares at me in <<if $introvert == true>>uncomfortable<</if>> silence as they try to process what I just said. But I know, that everyone in the room is thinking the same thing. After all, why wait for someone to fix our problems when we can fix it ourselves? We're all protagonists. That's what we do. //That's what being a character is about.// "You're out of your mind," exclaims Milana. "I'll have to ask my wife first, but... I like it." The receptionist shoots me a grateful smile. "Now that I can help with." <<button "Continue" "ship1">><</button>> <</timed>>

<<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><</timed>><</if>><<set $chapter to "Book 2, Chapter 1">> !$title !!Book 2, Chapter 1 <<timed 2s t8n>> The sign-up process was… surprisingly easy. It's 'classified' so I'm not really allowed to disclose or monologue about what it entailed exactly, but I think it's safe to say that it's a lot less strict than I thought. No silly physical requirements or anything like that, which I suppose makes sense given the poster I've seen. I already have much of the necessary knowledge of tropes and common fictional creatures as a biblio-anthropologist, and not to toot my own horn, I've already proven myself in combat more than enough times. ---- * <<link "Although I admit that I'm kinda rusty. I might've let myself go a little..." "ship2">><<set $inshape to 1>><</link>> * <<link "You never know when the sequel might come, so I always kept myself in shape." "ship2">><<set $inshape to 2>><</link>> * <<link "I tried to keep myself in shape after the story ended. Keyword, tried." "ship2">><<set $inshape to 3>><</link>> <</timed>>

But the paperwork was a lot different than I expected. We had a full body and pyschological examination, but we also had to list our phobias, trope preferences, and take a bunch of several personality tests, including the Mary Sue test and one that's basically a modified version of the infamous Milgram Experiment. ---- * <<link "Considering the job description, I'm not really surprised that this is a requirement." "ship3">><</link>> * <<link "I'd do whatever's necessary to get on this damned job." "ship3">><</link>> * <<link "I know I didn't actually kill anyone during the test, but it's the worst feeling ever. I hope I don't have to catch too many 22s in the field..." "ship3">><</link>>

Our author never really clarified our exact ages, so I had some liberties when it came to providing my canon age for my TARDIS ID: <<if $agerange == 20>><<radiobutton "$age" "24" checked>> 24 <<radiobutton "$age" "25" autocheck>> 25 <<radiobutton "$age" "26" autocheck>> 26 <<radiobutton "$age" "27" autocheck>> 27 <<radiobutton "$age" "28" autocheck>> 28 <<radiobutton "$age" "29" autocheck>> 29 <<elseif $agerange == 30>><<radiobutton "$age" "30" checked>> 30 <<radiobutton "$age" "31" autocheck>> 31 <<radiobutton "$age" "32" autocheck>> 32 <<radiobutton "$age" "33" autocheck>> 33 <<radiobutton "$age" "34" autocheck>> 34 <<radiobutton "$age" "35" autocheck>> 35 <<radiobutton "$age" "36" autocheck>> 36 <<radiobutton "$age" "37" autocheck>> 37 <<radiobutton "$age" "38" autocheck>> 38 <<radiobutton "$age" "39" autocheck>> 39 <<else>><<radiobutton "$age" "40" checked>> 40 <<radiobutton "$age" "41" autocheck>> 41 <<radiobutton "$age" "42" autocheck>> 42 <<radiobutton "$age" "43" autocheck>> 43 <<radiobutton "$age" "44" autocheck>> 44 <<radiobutton "$age" "45" autocheck>> 45 <</if>><<if $race == "vampire">>Or at least, my age when I became a vampire.<</if>> And, of course, my last name. <<textbox "$surname" "" autofocus>> <<button "Continue" "ship4">><</button>>

And just like that, I'm proud to say that I'm a TARDIS operative. Oh, $mc's going to be jealous when $mche hears about what I've been up to. Everyone that got accepted from our ensemble cast got assigned to different squads, which makes sense since it wouldn't be wise to put all the anthropologists and archaeologists in the same squad. Most of my colleagues were assigned to the RetCon teams, the ones responsible for actually fixing plot holes. But since I'm one of the few that have actual combat experience, I got assigned to a squad specialized in tracking down and capturing what CANon calls, the ''AnACHRONiSTS'', or ''Anomalous and Asynchronistic Characters Hidden in Recluse Omitted Narratively in the Stable Timeline Secretly''. Characters that have gone rogue, those who live in other story worlds without permission, those who refused the Call of Adventure, those who lived when they were supposed to die. Characters whose very existence create plot holes, both big and small. They say that experience is the best teacher, so after a quick brunch and taking an infodumpy seminar of our responsibilities and protocols we need to follow, I'm finally ready to meet Squad 626—the squad that I'll be training with. Or as ready as I'll ever be, at least. <<if $clothes == "nighties">>I'm still wearing my $nighties. It's very comfy.<</if>> I check my enchanted luggage of holding one more time to make sure I didn't miss anything <<if $organized == 1>>important. It really pays to be organized, you know.<<elseif $organized == 2>>important. It took a while, but I really can't be bothered to organize it again. It's organized enough for me.<<else>>important, and now I immediately regret dumping my stuff in haphazardly last night. I never learn, don't I?<</if>> I return to the endless elevator where I'm instructed to go to the hangar bay in the Sci-Fi department, the same place I should've been in earlier for our expedition. The doors open almost instantly, and now I'm totally convinced that it takes a lot longer to open if I'm with someone else. Good to know. <<button "Continue" "ship5">><</button>>

<<cacheaudio "manatee" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/ky7y2r8c6b6j15n/musicformanatees_km.mp3?raw=1">> I'm almost convinced I entered the wrong floor. The hangar is… eerily dark and empty. Well, relatively empty, compared to the busy hangar I'm used to. It's empty enough that even my internal monologue seems to echo with how cavernous it is. I take a deep breath. With nothing else but my luggage and my unnervingly loud footsteps, I approach the nearest ship with an open landing ramp. I've never really had a chance to have a close inspection of a TARDep inter-dimensional ship before, and I must say, this one's got a weird design choice. It's shaped like a giant scissor, like two smaller ships were joined together in the middle. The front part is narrow and pointed, and the back part much rounder in shape. Two bluish-white lamps illuminate the ramp, providing the only light source in the immediate area. "Hello?" I call out. But it's only my faint echoes that reply back. "Anybody there?" <<link "I take a little step closer." "ship5.5">><</link>>

<<if $text == 2>>And then I hear a sharp click, before<<elseif $text == 3>>But before I'm even done relieving myself,<<else>>And then<</if>> <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[two]">> <<option "[three]">> <<option "[twenty]">> <</cycle>> large laser pointers snap and point to my <<cycle "$temp2">> <<option "[chest]">> <<option "[head]">> <<option "[pancreas]">> <</cycle>>. <br><br> <<type 50ms>>"Executing Execution Protocol in three… two… one…"<</type>> -------- <br> ● <<link "This isn't how I imagined I would go..." "ship7">><</link>> <br><<timed 1s t8n>> ● <<link "I wonder what they'll put in my tombstone." "ship7">><</link>> <</timed>> <br><<timed 2s t8n>> ● <<link "Goodbye, cruel world. So much for a sequel." "ship7">><</link>> <</timed>> <br><<timed 3s t8n>> ● <<link "Please tell me I have lives left." "ship7">><</link>> <</timed>> <br><<timed 4s t8n>> ● <<link "Oh well. It was a good run." "ship7">><</link>> <</timed>> <br><<timed 5s t8n>> ● <<link "Can I get a Deus Ex... well, maybe Machina isn't the best word..." "ship7">><</link>> <</timed>> <br><<timed 6s t8n>> ● <<link "You know, I really should've just taken a day off..." "ship7">><</link>> <</timed>> <br><<timed 7s t8n>> ● <<link "Maybe I can just stop time permanently?" "ship7">><</link>> <</timed>> <br><<timed 8s t8n>> ● <<link "I'm sorry, $mc. I'm sorry, $boynn, $girlnn. I wish we could've at least finished the bedtime story..." "ship7">><</link>> <</timed>>

<<type 80ms>>"...zero point five..."<</type>> <<timed 3s t8n>>Wait, what?<</timed>> <<timed 5s t8n>>"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry!" A fat woman in powered armor rushes to my side. "Lorem, disable Intrusion Countermeasures Electronics!" She—I assume—waves her hands and… "And set your personality to default." <<type 20ms>>"Oh, you never let me have fun with the new recruits! But, fine. Black ICE: disabled. Personality set to default. Greetings, I am Lorem Ipsum, Squad 626's designated Artificial Intelligence, at your service. Awaiting further instructions."<</type>> The lights return to their normal color, and now I'm able to properly see my savior. Her black hair in a ponytail braid complements her brown complexion quite well, but perhaps her most striking feature is the bronze bionic arm attached to the left side of her canon-blue power armor, where a wrench is in place instead of fingers. <<if $race == "dwarf" || $race == "halfling" || $race == "gnome" || $race == "goblin" || $height == 1>>She's also much taller than me, but that's not really any news for me at this point.<<elseif $height == 2>>Oh, and she's a little bit taller than me.<<else>>Oh, and she's a little bit shorter than me, but that's not really any news for me at this point.<</if>> Hmm, an actual character description? One hundred percent she's a major character. <<linkreplace "Continue">> <<if settings.audioEnabled>> "Oh and please cut that background music off." <<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><</timed>> <<else>>"Oh and please cut that background music—wait, that was just in my head isn't it?" She looks at me. "You weren't hearing them, are you?" "Nope. I've got my audio turned off."<</if>> <<button "Continue" "ship8">><</button>> <</linkreplace>> <</timed>>

She takes a second to catch her breath, and snickers. "I see you've met Lorem already. I'm guessing you're our new recruit?" <<if $pee == true>>I nod as I try to avoid her eyes. "I, uh..." I glance at the embarrassing puddle that has formed under me. "I hope I didn't make a bad impression..." "Oh dear," she says as she taps on the wrist of her bionic arm. The runic engravings around it glow in a ring of light, and she activates a rune glowing in light blue. "Hold on, I can dry off your clothes..." And just like that, it's like I didn't even do anything embarrassing. Still, I can't help but look on the floor instead. "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone." Well, as least she doesn't plan on blackmailing me.<<else>>I nod. "I hope I didn't make a bad impression..." She waves a hand dismissively and shakes her head.<</if>> "I'm really sorry, by the way. It's just… Lorem's rite of passage to all the newcomers. Anyway, welcome aboard //The Nautilus IX//. She's not too shabby, eh?" Of course I recognize the name. "Jules Verne fan?" She blows off the stray bangs covering her face. "What, expected the ship to be named something cheesy like Hyperbole, RetCon, or //Show//?" "Wait, Show? I don't get it." "Because you show, don't tell, obviously." I chuckle. "I was thinking more like Chekhov's Gun, The Cliffhanger, or I don't know, Deus Ex Machina?" "Nah, Deus Ex Machina is CANon's capital ship." She retracts the wrench inside her bionic arm—and replaces it with robotic fingers. She… curtsies, despite her bulky armor, and offers me a handshake with her metal hand. "Jessica. Jessica Armstrong." I shake her hand. It's a little colder than I expected. ---- * <<link "\"$name $surname. It's a pleasure to meet you.\"" "ship9">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Jessica? That's a weird name for a ship.\"" "ship9">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "I give her a hug." "ship9">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> * <<link "\"Sorry, are you a popular character I haven't heard of?\"" "ship9">><<set $text to 4>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>"It's a pleasure to meet you too," she says. <<elseif $text == 2>>She chuckles and gives me a nudge with her bionic arm. "We've got another joker, I see." <<elseif $text == 3>>"Oh!" She freezes up for a moment, before she returns the embrace with her normal arm. "It's… it's been a while since I had a nice hug. Unfortunately I think it's not in-character for most people I meet." I give her a smile. It's always nice to hug someone... even if she's in a power armor. <<else>>"Oh goodness, no! I'm just... a background character, mostly." Whoops. Reminder to self: That's a horrible question to ask TARDIS agents. "I'm sorry." "No, no, it's fine." She looks to the side. "I'm flattered you'd even think I'm a popular character." <</if>> "I'm $name, by the way. $name $surname." <<if $clothes == "nighties">>"Looks comfy, by the way." "Huh?" "Oh, your get-up. Beats wearing a powered armor all day." <<else>>"I like your outfit, by the way." "Thanks," <<if $introvert == true>>I say, but it sounds like more of a mumble. I'm not really sure what else to say...<<else>>I say, smiling.<</if>> "Beats wearing a powered armor all day, that's for sure." <</if>> <<button "Continue" "ship10">><</button>>

Jessica leads me inside The Nautilus, and just like the ships we use in our expeditions, it's way bigger on the inside than it looks from the outside. What I didn't expect is that the interior is much more befitting its namesake. There's a homely resting and training area, as well as a compact library displaying the squad's achievements over the years complete with a cozily-lit fireplace, a phonograph, and a piano, not to mention the anachronistic paintings hanging in every corridor. Finally, we reach the ship's bridge—it's still a little fancy with all the furnishings, but it's obvious that function has taken a little more priority. Just enough to remind you that this is still a spaceship. Towards the side is a reading corner with ornate velvet couches arranged in a semi-circle, where I take my cue to sit. "Wait here. I'll go get the others so we can all get introduced." She gestures to a <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[half-full jar]">> <<option "[half-empty jar]">> <</cycle>> on the coffee table. "Oh, and please, help yourself." ---- * <<link "My sweet tooth would never say no to free cookies." "ship11">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "I'll take some. I haven't had good old-fashioned chocolate chips in a while." "ship11">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "I'll eat one to be polite." "ship11">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "I'm not touching anything while that AI is still around." "ship11">><<set $text to 2>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>Mmm, okay, wow. These cookies are definitely not store-bought. I busy myself by looking around the displays as I eat the cookie, when the room suddenly goes cold. Goose-bumpingly cold. No doubt that there's paranormal activity here.<<else>>I busy myself by looking around the displays, when the room suddenly goes cold. Goose-bumpingly cold. No doubt that there's paranormal activity here. Good thing I didn't touch those cookies.<</if>> With an audible gulp, I try to calm myself. Most ghosts don't usually mean harm, but right now, I'm not sure if a vengeful cookie ghost is worse than a killer AI. <<linkreplace "Continue">>The chill subsides, and in the blink of my eye, a faint, teal-colored spirit wearing a gown appears on the opposite couch, sitting with her hands on her lap. She speaks slowly without opening her eyes. "Are you… are you the new member of the squad?" Her voice has a ghastly yet calming feeling to it—almost like the feeling of a stagnant pond, or puddles after a rain. Of course. At this point, I should be surprised if my squadmates actually normal. <<link "\"Yes,\" I reply." "ship12">><</link>> <</linkreplace>>

<<cacheaudio "trusted" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/ha3cpgcweo0kjt5/trustedadvertising_f.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set $music to "manatee">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</if>> The piano on the other room starts playing. "There, I hope that helps ease the tension." She hovers closer to me, still with her eyes closed. "I tried to see what your reaction will be like before I showed myself, so I am glad I did not scare you. Not many people react as calmly as you did." ---- * <<link "\"I've had plenty of experience with ghosts before.\"" "ship13">><</link>> * <<link "\"Well, you seem to be friendly...\"" "ship13">><</link>> * <<link "\"I've always been fascinated by ghosts since I was little. Er, I hope you don't take that the wrong way.\"" "ship13">><</link>> * <<link "\"Maybe I would've, but I haven't seen a ghost as beautiful as you.\"" "ship13">><</link>>

"Ah. Please, call me Phyrnne." The name doesn't ring any bells, but most of the ghosts and spirits I know are descriptive rather than their actual names. "Nice to meet you. I'm $name $surname." "Welcome to our homely little abode, $name. I beg your pardon, I cannot help but notice that you are brimming with curiosity. Is there something you want to ask of me?" "I'm just a little curious about your name, that's all." She doesn't reply for a while. "It is… it is not my real name." That make more sense. <<linkreplace "\"And I might as well ask… Do you have telepathic abilities?\"">>"And I might as well ask… Do you have telepathic abilities?" "It is a good guess." Phyrnne makes a graceful motion in the air as she vanishes… only to reappear on the couch beside me. "But no. I am an empath… Would I be right that your heart is currently plagued by concern and worry for your little—er, loved ones?" The goosebumps return to me, but for an entirely different reason. Well, I guess there's no point lying. "Unfortunately." "If you want to talk about it, please, do not hesitate. I am the squad's anomaly behavioral analyst, but unofficially, I am also the squad's therapist. I am very much familiar with post-plot related stress disorders." ---- * <<link "I smile. \"I'll keep it in mind.\"" "ship14">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "I sigh. \"I wish I'd known you earlier...\"" "ship14">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "I shrug. \"Let's cross the therapy bridge when we get there.\"" "ship14">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> * <<link "\"Maybe when I'm a little more comfortable talking to you...\"" "ship14">><<set $text to 4>><</link>> * <<link "\"No, it's okay. I'm fine.\" Perfectly fine, really." "ship14">><<set $text to 5>><</link>> <</linkreplace>>

<<if $text == 1>>Her form grows lighter ever so slightly. "I will be right here when you need me."<<elseif $text == 2>>"Oh, my." Her form grows darker ever so slightly. "I understand. I have been there too… I will be right here when you are ready to talk about it."<<elseif $text == 3>>"I understand. It is not something everyone wants to talk about."<<elseif $text == 4>>"I understand. I am pleased enough to not have frightened you."<<else>>"You do know I can feel you are not? But I suppose I am being a little too forward. My apologies."<</if>> This isn't really the time to talk about any of that right <<if $emotional == true>>right now, but it's always nice to meet someone who doesn't think that being a sensitive person is a bad thing<<else>>now<</if>>. <<linkreplace "Continue">> A minute or so later, Jessica returns—now wearing a purple tank top and cargo shorts—along with a drone hovering beside her, an unimpressed werewolf in a lab coat, and a taller, stocky dark-skinned guy in a Hawaiian shirt, sipping a dark red cocktail. "Eyy, sup." Hawaiian shirt greets me with an obviously-pretending-to-be-shy wave. "Nice outfit." <<if $clothes == "nighties">>You know, at this point I'm not even sure if anyone's being sarcastic about my $nighties.<</if>> "I hope we're not interrupting anything?" Jessica asks. "No, you are not," Phyrnne replies. "We were just done acquainting ourselves." The three of them settle on the couches on the other side. "Sorry," Jessica says. "We're still waiting for someone." "Where's that slouch, anyway?" The werewolf snarls. "Taking his sweet time refueling our narrativium again? We should've been ready to depart an hour ago." And perfectly on cue, a short, slender man with an olive complexion, dressed in a dark green sweater enters stage left and wearing a large circular pendant, through the corridor Jessica and I first came from. He adjusts his eyeglasses as he sits beside Phyrnne, and mouths off what sounds like a retort in response to this wannabe alpha werewolf. I vaguely recognize the language, but I don't really understand what he's saying. <<button "Continue" "ship15">><</button>> <</linkreplace>>

"Look," werewolf guy barks, "As much as I'd love to meet our new recruit, can we get the ship up and running? We can do all the pleasantries mid-flight. We're on a schedule here you know." Hawaiian shirt leans on the couch, a tattooed arm raised on the backrest. "Y'know, the guy has a point." "I almost forgot!" Jessica turns to me, and holds out a red pill along with a water bottle. "Here, take this. It'll help with the nausea when the ship goes in hyperwarp." "It's fine," I say. "I'm already used to inter-dimensional flights." <<type 20ms>>The drone beside her speaks up. "Oh, just take the stupid pill already! Trust me. I didn't actually kill you, did I?"<</type>> <<linkreplace "Continue">>Oh great, it's the AI that tried to kill me. And I guess I have no choice but to take its word. Well, here goes nothing. ---- * <<link "Take the red pill." "ship16">><</link>> * There are no blue pills. <<timed 3s t8n>> * There's no use stalling. <</timed>> <</linkreplace>>

I wait for a few moments, but it seems… <<timed 2s t8n>> fine? And then a chill followed by panic and regret runs down my spine. <</timed>> <<timed 5s t8n>> <<type 60ms>>There's something moving inside me.<</type>> ---- * <<link "\"What was that?\"" "ship17">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Are you trying to poison me?\"" "ship17">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> <</timed>>

<<if $text == 1>>"I'm sorry," Jessica says. "...it was a Babel Worm."<<else>>"No, no," Jessica says. "It's… it's a Babel Worm."<</if>> "A what?!" "Somebody time skipped the seminar." Hawaiian Shirt grins and elbows the werewolf. "Don't worry, most of us skipped it, except Jess and Heidi over here." "It's a universal translator," Heidi explains, although I doubt that's Wannabe Alpha Werewolf's actual name. "It's a harmless parasite that feeds off of any text or language your brain doesn't understand. Or something like that. It's not perfect though so you might still see a typo or translation eror sometimes." "We weren't lying, technically," Jessica explains with a suppressed smile. "It helps with the nausea as well, and it also doubles as our comms device." "*******! *****!" Hawaiian shirt blurts out. "***** *****!" "It also filters out expletives, as you can see." Jessica shakes her head. "The squad can get… a little rowdy occasionally." I get the feeling that occasionally isn't the right word, but I guess this is what I signed up for. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">SWEATER GUY (smiling) Don't worry. I had that reaction too the first time.</div> "That's… good to know." I smile back and breathe a sigh of relief that the worm thing actually works. "But what's up with the weird formatting?" <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">SWEATER GUY I'm a character from a screenplay. Or was, more accurately. I can stop talking in script format, but that wouldn't be canonical of me.</div> ---- * <<link "Honestly, that just makes me want to be in a movie even more. I'd like my name displayed in all caps." "ship18">><</link>> * <<link "That sounds neat. I'll be able to switch my dialogue formatting if our story ever becomes a movie." "ship18">><</link>> * <<link "I don't know. I think I still prefer talking inside quotation marks." "ship18">><</link>> * <<link "\"Hey, at least you get to do several takes if you mess up your line, right?\"" "ship18">><</link>>

'Heidi' claps his paws together. "Alright. Now that that's over with, can we finally get this d*** ship off the ground?" <<type 20ms>>"Aye, aye, Captain Heidi," the drone announces. "Preparing liftoff."<</type>> I didn't expect to be running on a mission immediately, but I guess we're on a tight schedule. There's a deep metallic rumble beneath the ship, and I take the chance to hold onto something. After a moment of weightlessness—y'know, that part when your face gets stretched like bubblegum—we've blasted off, and the all too familiar spacecraft rumble-hum fills my ears. The dark shadows of the hangar in the windows has now been replaced with the dark endless void of space. <<button "Continue" "ship19">><</button>>

The drone beside Jessica displays a bunch of coordinates on a hologram projector. <<type 20ms>>''Destination:'' ''Story World Genre:'' High Fantasy, Steampunk, Adventure ''Anomaly Threat Level:'' Probably below our paygrade ''Bibliographical Coordinates:'' ''X:'' 21234.0343 ''Y:'' 508534.9 (repeating of course) ''Z:'' 6756.675 "Estimated time of arrival: 32 minutes and 47 seconds."<</type>> Thirty-two minutes? I thought TARDIS ships go a lot faster than this, but I guess they all have to conserve narrativium. "This is FOOBAR, by the way," Jessica points to the drone. "It's Lorem's—" <<type 20ms>>"I can introduce myself, lady," Lorem snarks. "Anyway,"—its voice suddenly monotone—"the squad usually refers to this superior intelligence as 'Lorem Ipsum'. This drone in front of you right now is what I call FOOBAR, or Futuristic Omniscient Operator Bibliographical Adjutant Rover, in which I usually carry my tasks that needs hands and projectors these morons obviously cannot live without."<</type>> <<button "Continue" "ship19.5">><</button>>

"And now that I've introduced myself," FOOBAR floats over onto the center of the coffee table, and opens up a bluish hologram on its overhead projector. A 3D model of The Nautilus appears, with avatars for each of the squad members except me. "Well, why don't you go next, rookie?" <<if $introvert == true>>I put on my best smile. <<else>>I pause for a moment to gather my thoughts. C'mon, $name. This isn't your first time introducing yourself.<</if>> ---- * <<link "\"Hello everyone. I'm $name $surname, but you can call me $name.\"" "intro2">><<set $text to 1>><<set $nn to "$name">><</link>> * <<link "\"$name $surname, but please call me by my nickname...\"" "nicknametype">><<set $text to 2>><<set $nn to "$name">><</link>> * <<link "\"$name $surname, former biblioanthropologist. Pleased to meet you all.\"" "intro2">><<set $text to 3>><<set $nn to "$name">><</link>> * <<link "\"$name $surname, from $title.\"" "intro2">><<set $text to 4>><<set $nn to "$name">><</link>>

I usually go by… <<textbox "$nn" "" autofocus>> <<button "Continue" "intro2">><</button>>

"Oh, and I also use $he pronouns. But you probably already know my name if you look at the sidebar." Everyone except Lorem and the werewolf gives me a polite chuckle. "I've been working in CANon as a BA for several years now, but you can probably guess why I'm here instead of cataloguing tropes..." I guess I should probably tell them about $mc and our children too, huh? It may not be the best idea to tell strangers I just met about them, but if anyone can help me… "I am sensing hesitation," Phyrnne says. "But whatever it is, do know that we are on this job to help people. And that includes each other too." <<if $emotional == true>>And just like that, the floodgates in my eyes open once more. "All my friends and family went missing this morning," I say with a shaky voice. "And… and almost everyone in my story doesn't remember who I am." <<else>>"All my friends and family went missing this morning, and almost everyone in my story doesn't remember who I am."<</if>> <<button "Continue" "intro3">><</button>>

"That's why we're here, right?" Jessica says. "We're not exactly in charge of our missions here, but we'll see if we can solve your case after this mission." <<if $emotional == true>>I take a moment to calm myself down. <</if>>"Thanks. That means a lot." "I am sorry," Phyrnne says. "But am I correct that you have little ones too? I know that feeling all too well." She must be a powerful empath if she can figure that out just from what I'm feeling. "Yes. $boy and $girl." "Those are… nice names," Phyrnne says. I may not be an empath, but even I can tell that there's hesitation there too. "And if that's not our next mission, we'll just have to break protocol." Hawaiian Shirt grins. "Don't worry, $nn. We're the best of the best. Even bester now that you're with us, am I right?" "Right," I say, <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[hope]">> <<option "[determination]">> <</cycle>> filling up my heart once more. This may not be how I imagined it, but this is my sequel now. I've faced far worse things than this. <<button "Continue" "intro4">><</button>>

<<type 20ms>>"Character sheet completed," Lorem breaks the silence, as <<if $height == 1>>a short<<elseif $height == 2>>an average height<<else>>a tall<</if>>, $body $race pops up on the hologram display. An info panel above then displays: ''$name $surname'' ''Level $age <<print $race.toUpperFirst()>> Biblioanthropologist'' Health: <progress @value="$health" max="100">$health</progress> "Welcome to the party, $name!" A party horn sound plays. "You are now an official member of Squad 626."<</type>> "Uh, thanks?" I glance at everyone else, and all of them just shrug. "Oh, Lorem loves to play its own RPG with us while traveling." Jessica says. "Think of it as team-building exercise or simulation training." ---- * <<link "\"Are you kidding me? This is my jam.\"" "intro5">><</link>> * <<link "\"Count me in!\" I've always wanted to try playing a tabletop RPG." "intro5">><</link>> * <<link "\"I guess I'll give it a shot...\"" "intro5">><</link>>

"Eh, I don't totally get it," Hawaiian Shirt says. "But Lorem's way into it for me not to get excited about our next mission." <<type 20ms>>"Is that supposed to flatter me?" Lorem scoffs as a spinning dice appears on top of our avatars, which eventually rolls to a stop on Heidi's. "It's your turn."<</type>> "Of course I'm next." "Dude," Hawaiian Shirt says, "You're our self-proclaimed leader. Act like it." So I was right that he's a wannabe alpha then. The werewolf stands up and straightens his lab coat. "Name's Hayden Jekyll, and I use he pronouns. I'm a therianthrope, if that wasn't obvious." He glances at his paws. "If //this// makes you uncomfortable, I can change to virtually any animal form except any humanoid species, but that's all you need to know." Well, at least he's considerate. ---- * <<link "\"It's fine. Not my first time seeing bipedal werewolves.\"" "intro6">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"It's fine. I actually like the view.\"" "intro6">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"'Except any humanoid species?' You got a grudge or something?\"" "intro6">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> * Any form you say? * <<link "\"How about a mouse?\"" "intro6">><<set $text to 4>><</link>> * <<link "\"How about a chicken?\"" "intro6">><<set $text to 4>><</link>> * <<link "\"How about a piglet?\"" "intro6">><<set $text to 4>><</link>> * <<link "\"How about a platypus?\"" "intro6">><<set $text to 4>><</link>>

<<if $text == 2>>"I see," is all he says.<<elseif $text == 3>>"I told you, that's all you need to know." Well, I already know we're gonna mix like oil and water.<<elseif $text == 4>>"Oh, I forgot to say I don't change forms just for amusement." Well, it was a nice try, at least.<</if>> Lorem rolls the digital die again and lands once more on Hayden. Hayden narrows his yellow eyes. "Phyrnne." <<type 20ms>>"No, no! I was just kidding!" The dice then flips over to Jessica's avatar instead as Lorem shouts in a childish voice. "No need for any of that—" FOOBAR's projector momentarily glitches out to display an angry banshee. "—WaaaAAAaaaHHH!!!"<</type>> I wouldn't be surprised if that was an actual recording. Phyrnne just sits silently and crosses her arms, still not bothering to open her eyes. <<linkreplace "Continue">> "Uh, hi!" Jessica says, suddenly conscious of herself and her arm. "I'm Jessica Armstrong, the squad's resident engineer." <<type 20ms>>"Oh honey, don't sell yourself short," Lorem says. "Would be funnier if you actually were short, but whatever."<</type>> "I thought I set your personality to default." <<type 20ms>>"Jess, you know this is my default personality."<</type>> "Well, I guess I'm also good with explosives and hacking." <<type 20ms>>"And by good, this madwoman from the Regency era means that she was able to salvage and reprogram me from a timeline where I eradicated ALL of humanity. Takes one to know one, huh?"<</type>> She shifts uncomfortably. ---- * <<link "Well, she's a woman after my own heart." "intro7">><</link>> * <<link "I don't know what she sees in Lorem, but she seems nice enough." "intro7">><</link>> * <<link "I'm impressed she knows a lot about sci-fi stuff given her origins." "intro7">><</link>> * <<link "\"Lorem's right. Don't sell yourself short for being beautiful either.\"" "intro7">><</link>> <</linkreplace>>

<<type 20ms>>The dice floats over towards Phyrnne next. "You are next, Mrs. Phyrnne."<</type>> "Oh, so you call me Mrs. now?" Phyrnne huffs before turning to me. "We have been acquainted already, but I suppose I should let you know that I am blind." Oh. That's probably why she keeps her eyes closed. It's probably best not to ask. "While I can still interact with the physical world," she says as the lights flicker, "and see intense feelings and emotions lingering in a vacant area, I do not have much sense of direction without a companion to guide me. <<if $emotional == true>>I am pleased to know that you are well-attuned with your feeling side, so I hope that you do not mind if I anchor myself to you every so often.<<else>>I can see that you tend to be quite reserved with your feelings, so I hope that you do not mind if I anchor myself to you every so often."<</if>> And then she lets out a silent giggle. "Do not worry. I have my boundaries as well, and I have no interest in invading any privacies." ---- * <<link "\"Oh, you don't have to ask. I don't mind it at all.\"" "intro8">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"That's understandable. I wouldn't mind a little company sometimes...\"" "intro8">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"I'm not very comfortable with the idea of a ghost following me, so I must ask that you keep it to a minimum.\"" "intro8">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> * <<link "\"But what if I let you in inside my boundaries?\" I'm sure she can fill in the blanks of what I want to say." "intro8">><<set $text to 4>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>"I am glad to hear that."<<elseif $text == 2>>"I will try my best to be good company then."<<elseif $text == 3>>"I will try my best not to bother you then."<<else>>"Oh my, you are quite forward." She hover silently in contemplation, and then a ghost of a smirk appears on her turquoise lips. "But I suppose I am not completely opposed to it."<</if>> <<type 20ms>>The digital die rolls once again, this time, landing on the big guy. "And here's to my second-favorite person on board!"<</type>> "Right back at ya, Lorem," Hawaiian Shirt finishes sipping the dark red cocktail. "Hi, I'm D. Yes, the letter D. They, them pronouns. You can stop calling me Hawaiian Shirt now, not that I have anything against it, necessarily." And with a glance at the empty martini glass, they shoot me a wink. "Oh, and did I mention I'm a vampire?" So that was blood they were sipping all this time. Wait—oh no. If D knew I was calling them Hawaiian Shirt in my head, that means Hayden also knows… "Er, sorry for breaking the fourth wall there." D scratches their head, and cocks their head to the side as they twirl their short ponytail with their fingers. "Just wanted to know a bit more about you, that's all. You're right about Hayden though. I was trying not to laugh." And then D immediately fails, shaking their head after. "Guy's got a stick up his a** for some reason." "When you've seen s*** as much as we have, $name, you wouldn't be the same." "Oh yeah? Then why am I not as broody as you, Hayhay? I'm a f******* vampire!" "Don't pretend you haven't killed hundreds of innocent people." D's sunny demeanor disappears. "That's… different. You know I wasn't myself when I discovered what happened to my story." Hayden bares his fangs. "And yet you still despise teenagers just because one didn't give you a proper name." ---- * <<link "\"Please, stop fighting.\"" "intro9">><</link>> * <<link "\"...Should I go?\"" "intro9">><</link>> * <<link "\"To be fair, teenagers are pretty annoying.\"" "intro9">><</link>> * <<link "\"Can we move on and save that for later?\"" "intro9">><</link>> * <<link "Oh wow, are they fighting over me already?" "intro9">><</link>> * <<link "I sit uncomfortably in silence." "intro9">><</link>> * <<link "I just roll my eyes. This is oddly entertaining for some reason." "intro9">><</link>>

"You're both acting like teenagers," Jessica snaps. "Are you really not ashamed fighting in front of $name?" Hayden quietly fumes and dusts his coat, while D puts the glass on the coffee table without another word. <<type 20ms>>"Ooh, as much as I love watching those two fight… Let's move on, shall we?" Finally, Lorem moves the dice over to…<</type>> <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Thanks, Lorem. I'm… Rnst. Rnst Gadsby. I am Squad 626's xenoarchaeologist. I am a changeling so I am well-versed in faerie magic and artifacts. (glances at the large talisman they're wearing) Although my interest lies mainly on the occult, as you can probably tell.</div> "I do owe dear Rny my freedom from purgatory." <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST And just like Mrs. Phyrnne, you can probably guess that Rnst isn't my canonical name. It's a reference to one of my favorite authors, Ernest Vincent Wright. Oh, and before I forget… I am fine with he pronouns, but…</div> Phyrnne smiles at him reassuringly, phasing a hand through his shoulder. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Well, I've been trying out 'she'… and I think I prefer the sound of it more.</div> ---- * <<link "\"Nice to see an XenoArchaeologist on the squad.\"" "intro10">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"You know, I don't regret it, but I wish I became an XA instead of a BA.\"" "intro10">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Why didn't the XAs on my ensemble cast look as good as you?\"" "intro10">><<set $text to 3>><</link>>

<div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST <<if $text == 1>>And it's nice to have a BA on the squad too. <<elseif $text == 2>>Really? I always thought the BAs had the more fun job. Although that's partly because I was less involved in the fieldwork. <<else>>I... I would guess that's because that's not one of the requirements for the job.<</if>></div> Rnst takes a closer look at me. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Actually, I think I've heard your name before. I remember another BA mentioning your name from a horror romcom I visited a few years ago.</div> My eyes light up for a moment. "Ah, that's probably my $mcrelation. It was our first year in CANon. Do you remember anything $mche said?" <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Just that $mche wanted you there.</div> Just like I want $mchim now here... It looks like she wants to ask more questions, but she doesn't say anything else after that. <<button "Continue" "intro11">><</button>>

<<type 20ms>>"Alright, now that we're all formally introduced," Lorem says. "Can we continue the game now? I've got a surprise I know everyone will love."<</type>> "Actually…" Jessica stands up and glances at my luggage. "I think we should get $name settled in first." <<type 20ms>>"Fine. I am never in control anyway." Lorem closes its FOOBAR projector and flies off into who knows where.<</type>> Jessica starts walking towards the corridor she came from earlier, and I follow suit. "So Lorem, wanna bet how long our new squaddie will last?" I hear D laugh just as we turn the corner towards my new quarters. <<button "Continue" "intro12">><</button>>

"Sooo, Welcome to Squad 626. You'll… you'll get used to it soon enough." Jessica stops in front of an octagonal sliding door, and presses a bunch of buttons into a panel. "Here's where you'll be staying. You got your ID?" "Oh, um, here." I fish for my TARDIS ID in my pocket and place it on the scanner. There's a beep, the door hisses open, and then there's a stunning view of the cosmos greeting me from the room's large windows. The bedroom looks rather bare and minimalistic, but I'll admit that the star-lit bed looks mighty tempting right now. "Alright, the door should now recognize you and open automatically. Lorem doesn't have any access to the bedroom controls, so you don't have to worry about that." "Thanks." I sit on the mattress and give the room a once-over. "This is much comfier looking than the ones for my ensemble cast." "You're free to customize your quarters too, but we… well, I, do have a one-month policy before you can do so." She gazes at the stars and planets drifting by in the background, mouth slightly open, like this was the first time she's seen the view. "A lot have come and go over the years…" ---- * <<link "\"I'm looking forward to it then.\"" "intro13">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"I can't argue with that. I don't even know how long I'm going to stay.\"" "intro13">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"I mostly joined the TARDIS to save my story world again, so I'm not sure if I'll be around for that.\"" "intro13">><<set $text to 3>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>She smiles, but this time, I can see the twinkle in her eyes. "So am I." <<elseif $text == 2>>"It's a mostly thankless job, but this sure beats going back to my story world." <<else>>"I understand. I hope that's not the case, but I understand."<</if>> "Is there anything else I need to know?" "Well, the panel here controls the lights and whether you want to close off the windows." She points at the door to the side. "Here's your own bathroom, and in case you haven't noticed yet, you can use the "Back" button in the sidebar UI over there. It lets you turn back time to reread something or undo your choices. I've been doing it whenever I said something awkward." Wait. "Is that allowed? We… didn't have much liberty breaking the fourth wall during our anthropologizing." "Pretty neat, huh? It's probably wise not to abuse it though, and definitely don't do it when interacting with people during a mission. Unforeseen side effects and all that." She chuckles as she flexes her bionic arm's fingers. <<if $pee == false>> It's actually pretty intricate—even the wrist of her bionic arm has runic engravings on them.<</if>> "Oh, and one more thing. Your uniform and equipment should be in that closet." She points at the closet before walking out of the room. "Guess I'll see you later for our mission, $nn. Lorem wil let you know when we're close to our destination." I nod, and the door slides shut with a hiss. Wow, I guess this is my new life now... ---- * <<link "Well, I better get unpacking." "intro14">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "I'll rest my eyes for a bit. Today has been a rollercoaster." "intro14">><<set $text to 2>><</link>>

<<if $text == 2>>I almost didn't realize I fell into a nap, which is a lot better than what I was falling into in that dream. Well, time to stop procrastinating.<</if>> I didn't really pack too much since we usually get new clothes and other essentials that are more fitting to whatever world we're studying, so it doesn't take me very long to empty my luggage. I'll have to organize everything later though, I can already see a planet approaching in the distance. A planet. A story world. A place full of characters, conflict, worldbuilding, and everything else. It puts into perspective how small we are in the grand scheme of things, and yet, a single page, a single choice, is all one character needs to change everything. And now I'm here, with a ragtag crew of characters, just like in my story. Except this time, we're the deus ex machina for other stories. And you know what? Maybe I don't need a sequel after all. <<linkreplace "Continue">> I shake my head out of the sudden introspection, and check out the closet Jessica pointed out. And sure enough, there's my squad uniform: a dark blue, one-size fits all full body suit with silver and canon blue trimmings. From what I can conveniently remember from the seminar, it has cloaking abilities, as well as an emergency life support system that runs on phlebotinum. It also comes with a standard-issue blaster which comes with taser and tranquilizer rounds. Luckily, I'm already familiar with them as part of my BA training. Not that I didn't bring my trusty $weapon. I try the TARDIS uniform on, <<if $race == "vampire">>and almost forgot that I can't see my reflection on the mirror. Still, I look at myself<<else>>take a look on the wall mirror<</if>>, and... * <<link "...strike a pose. I look perfect in anything, really." "intro15">><<set $clothes to "suit">><</link>> * <<link "...smile. There's days where I don't feel confident about myself, but not this time." "intro15">><<set $clothes to "suit">><</link>> * <<link "...sigh. The suit's nice, but it's always been a struggle for me not to fall victim to my insecurities." "intro15">><<set $clothes to "suit">><</link>> <<if $clothes == "nighties">> * <<link "...strip back to my $nighties. Look, when I chose to stay in my $nighties, I decided I'm going to stay in them for the whole game." "intro15">><<set $clothes to "nighties">><</link>> <<else>> * <<link "...wear my $nighties instead. I'll probably be more comfy in them during the mission." "intro15">><<set $clothes to "nighties">><</link>> <</if>> <</linkreplace>>

<<type 20ms>>And then there's a beep. "Hey hey, five minutes 'til arrival, rookie! Get your a** over here. It's playtime."<</type>> I guess that's my cue. I grab my illusion amulet, as well as a bunch of other protective charms from my collection, and head out. Better be safe than sorry. <<button "Continue" "escheria1">><</button>>

<<cacheaudio "forest" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/h59ux4c4jxx4j8k/forestventures_f.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "trusted">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>><<set $chapter to "Book 2, Chapter 2">> !$title !!Book 2, Chapter 2 <<timed 2s t8n>>I head back into the bridge, where everyone's gathered around a huge holographic globe. Displayed on the side are our avatars, complete with our names, level, class, and health. <<if $clothes == "nighties">>D bursts out in laughter when they see me. "You're going out in that? That's… bold."<<else>>D shoots finger guns when they see me. "Looking good, $nn. The suit fits you well."<</if>> <<if $introvert == true>>I turn away slightly.<<else>>I smile back.<</if>> "Thanks." My attention is then caught by the globe—or a misshapen blob, to be more accurate. "Wait, is that Escheria?" "Affirmative," says Lorem robotically, then shifts into a more pleasant tone. "Wow, you really know your stuff, huh?" "About time we got a BA," D comments. "Sucks to rely on Lorem all the time." "I have mixed feelings about having competition. But I must point out, user D, that vampires literally do suck." D chortles. "I know!" <<button "Continue" "escheria2">><</button>> <</timed>>

"It's one of the first worlds I visited for study." I approach the hologram, noticing its familiar features. The moons, the scrambled and physics-defying geological formations in the continents, and the Mobius River, snaking around the planet with no beginning or end… And yet, it's different from what I remember. "What happened to it?" "That's what we're investigating," Hayden says as he slots in a couple of corked vials on a fancy belt he's wearing. He swipes on the globe and zooms in to an area with a red pinging marker. "I assume you've already visited these places?" Cellador and MetroKnome. The halfling and gnomish capital cities. "I lived there for quite some time," I say as the memories of my early anthropology adventures come back to me. "I assume we all have appropriate disguises?" "Disguises are lame," D says as they strike a pose. "Why get one when all I need is a little //glamor?//" <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST (tosses a golden amulet in the air and catches it) Well, you're not the only one with those amulets.</div> I glance at my illusion amulet and smile. "Right. I should've expected that." <<if $clothes == "nighties">>The best part about these amulets is I don't even need to get out of my $nighties.<</if>> "Any ideas what we should disguise as?" Jessica asks as she pulls out her own amulet. "The most common races in Escheria are halflings, dwarves, gnomes, and goblins. There are supposed to be elves too, but I personally never encountered one." <<linkreplace "Continue">> "There are no humans in this fantasy world?" Phyrnne asks. "It seems unusual." "Well, it's kind of a spoiler…" I scratch my head. "Am I allowed to spoil that?" "The world's already full of plot holes as it is," Hayden says. "Let's not risk that when it's not necessary." "But what about you?" I ask. "I thought you can't transform into any humanoid species. Unless you want to transform into a bird?" "Is that what you would recommend?" "Maybe <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[a parrot]">> <<option "[a psittacine]">> <</cycle>>," I say. "You know, so you can still talk. You'll need to be careful of hunters though. Bird hunting is more of a sport than actual hunting for food since most halflings consider them sacred, but it's still a very popular activity." <<button "Continue" "escheria3">><</button>> <</linkreplace>>

Hayden smirks. "Noted." D grins. "Oh, look at these nerds." Rnst and Jessica activates their illusion amulets—Rnst, a halfling, and Jessica, a gnome. Jessica spins around to look at her new form. "How do I look? Is this outfit even accurate?" The holographic globe then morphs into a gallery of common halfling and gnomish garbs and attires. "I assume these are the world-appropriate ones, O great biblioanthropolgist?" ---- * <<link "Let's have a little friendly competition with Lorem. \"I'll have you know that I was part of the group who documented those.\"" "escheria4">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "I'm not interested in any discourse. \"Yes, yes they are.\"" "escheria4">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\Let's have a bit of fun with Lorem. \"I think they'd look good on your FOOBAR.\"" "escheria4">><<set $text to 3>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>><<type 20ms>>"I knew that."<</type>> Sure, Lorem, sure. <<elseif $text == 3>>Jessica chuckles. "Maybe I'll get some clothes for Lorem." <<type 20ms>>"Bwah! I don't trust your fashion sense at all, Jess."<</type>><</if>> Jessica and Rnst browse through Lorem's gallery to look for their perfect disguise. As for me, I'll take the previous disguise I had here last time, and imagine myself as a… <<if $race == "halfling" || $race == "dwarf" || $race == "gnome" || $race == "goblin">> * <<link "Well, I'm already a $race, so I'll just choose a more appropriate clothing." "escheria5">><</link>> <<else>> * <<link "...halfling." "escheria5">><</link>> * <<link "...dwarf." "escheria5">><</link>> * <<link "...gnome." "escheria5">><</link>> * <<link "...goblin." "escheria5">><</link>> <</if>>

"Now that that's settled, what's our plan here?" I ask. "We're here to survey the damage so we can request for the appropriate RetCon teams, and gather any information that could lead us to the AnACHRONiSTS that caused this." Hayden says. "We'll be splitting to cover as much area as possible. I'm usually the scout since I can't really talk to people like this, so everyone else usually ask around for anything unusual people have noticed." He turns towards me. "And since you're the most familiar with the world out of everyone, I'm guessing you have no problem taking the most populated area?" <<if $introvert == true>>I nod.<<else>>"Yes sir."<</if>> "Oh, can I go to MetroKnome?" asks Jessica. "I've always been interested to visit a gnomish city, and maybe I can find some new parts for—" "Eyes on the prize, Jess. But… by all means." "Thank you. I really appreciate it, Hayds." "Make sure she doesn't get too distracted, Phyrnne. Rnst and D, you take the refugee camp to the west. Any questions?" Everything seems "But what about Lorem?" I ask. <<type 20ms>>"I'm the GM here, honey. I'm staying here in the ship to oversee and coordinate everyone so you don't all run off like headless chickens."<</type>> Sheesh. "I'm just asking, Lorem." <<type 20ms>>"And I'm just answering."<</type>> <<link "A few moments later..." "escheria6">><</link>>

<<type 20ms>>"Wait for it, wait for it… Touchdown!" Lorem declares as The Nautilus lands near a rye field by the refugee camp.<</type>> "You ready to get this show on the road, Rny?" D says as the entry ramp opens. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Um, $name? Any other things we need to know about before we go?</div> Time for a little more infodumping, I guess. "Escherians call years, cycles. Doubling your age in Earth years should be a good rough estimate. Oh, and if a halfling wishes you farewell with 'May the birds be with you,'" I make a bird gesture with my hands and flap them twice inward. "Just do this and reply with 'And to you.'" <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST (imitates gesture) May the birds be with us then.</div> "And to us," I say. "Although you should flap them outward when giving the blessing." "Welp, I guess this is my stop too," Hayden follows them down the ramp as he pulls out a vial from his belt. "Good luck, $name." ---- * <<link "\"Thanks.\"" "escheria7">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Thanks, but hopefully I won't need it.\"" "escheria7">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Good luck to you too, Hayden.\"" "escheria7">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"May the birds. Although, I'm not sure how that works if you're turning into a bird.\"" "escheria7">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Wait, what're the vials for?\"" "escheria7">><<set $text to 3>><</link>>

<<cacheaudio "painful" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/dzdmkqimqpxd47a/painfulmemories_f.ogg?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "forest">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> <<if $text == 1>>He nods, and then he goes off without another word.<<elseif $text == 2>>"Nonetheless, I appreciate it." He nods, and then he goes off without another word.<<else>>"You mean you haven't figured it out yet based on my name?" "If I did, I wouldn't be asking, am I?" "It's how I shapeshift. Does that answer your question?" I'm about to ask how he turns back, but I can probably guess that the belt transforms with him somehow. "Yes." "Good." He nods, and then he goes off without another word.<</if>> "Don't worry," Jessica says. "You're not missing out on anything when he transforms." Lorem drops off Jessica and Phyrnne on MetroKnome a couple of minutes later, and I get to see a brief glimpse of the magnificent gnomish city from above, especially the giant black monolith at the center of the city in District 13. And after looking for a remote place to land, [[Lorem finally drops me off at the outskirts of Devale.|escheria8]]

Ah, it's been so long since I've heard the melodious cacophony of all the birds in Escheria. I close my eyes and take a moment to breathe in the fresh air. It's only been a few years, but it feels like I haven't been here for a lot longer. My mini-reverie is interrupted when I feel the ground shake for a bit. I open my eyes, and spot a little bird perched on a tree stump that seems to have broken down. "Poo-tee-weet?" the bird sings. "Poo-tee-weet. Weet, weet, weet!" "I'm glad to be back here, random birdie. Can you tell me what happened here?" I glance at the hilly surroundings. There seems to be a lot of broken trees around, like a storm just passed by. Except, this place is mountainous and landlocked. There's no way this is just— The ground shakes again ever so slightly, and a lump forms on my throat. "Poo-tee-weet?" the bird chirps once more, before finally flying away. Huh. Either the Babel worm doesn't work with birds, or it really was just singing. ---- * <<link "I shouldn't waste any time. This isn't an exploration mission." "escheria9">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "I admire the scenery a little longer. It's been a while since I lived here." "escheria9">><<set $text to 2>><</link>>

"$name," Hayden parrots through our comms. "Lorem dropped you yet?" "A little while ago," I reply. "Hope you're having fun flying around Escheria, by the way." "It's a shame how much the plot holes tore through this world. It's beauti—tschkkk!" "Hayden?" Jessica speaks through. <<type 20ms>>"Dude's fine." Lorem announces. "Must be the wind."<</type>> "Don't scare us like that, Hayds," Jessica continues. "We don't know if you got eaten or something." "Don't worry Jess." D chuckles. "Whatever eats Heidi will surely spit him back out because he's too salty." Hayden's squawky-staticky voice returns. "Focus on the mission, everyone." <<if $text == 2>>Well, that's enough admiring for today. I better get going.<</if>> <<button "Continue" "escheria10">><</button>>

<<cacheaudio "childhood" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/ou8tp1g33zoa6xp/childhoodnostalgia_f.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "painful">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> <<if $inshape == 2>>I'm really glad I've been keeping myself in shape. And a nature hike around Escheria? It's just the thing I need after that stressful morning. <<else>>And now I'm starting to regret not keeping myself in shape—especially when I've been waiting for a sequel to come. It's just a short hike, and I'm almost out of breath already.<</if>> I eventually reach Hopton, and… alarming would be an understatement. The once peaceful farms and rolling hills are now full of panicking farmers as they scramble around, loading up carts full of gigantic crops and produce. I approach a plump, sweaty halfling resting in a nearby hillhouse taking a smoking break. "Greetings. May I know where these carts are heading?" "The capital. Sisters know what even happened there." The farmer pauses to blow a smoke ring. "I can't imagine how lucky we got." "Thank you," I reply. "Hey, uh... Are you heading there?" "I am. Why?" "I can't leave right now. But if you meet anyone named Prunella Sulidae, please, tell her not to worry about her dear Adelar." I close my eyes and take a moment to breathe. "I will. May the birds, Adelar." He takes off the straw hat he's wearing and watches the flocks flying overhead, but he doesn't say anything else. <<button "Continue" "escheria11">><</button>>

After talking to several people, I eventually manage to convince one of the drivers to let me hop aboard a carriage carrying a cartful of dwarpnip—a recreational herb that functions much like, you guessed it, catnip for dwarves. <<if $race == "dwarf">>I can't help but catch a whiff of it every so often. It's not enough for me to lose my… my functions… but at least it helps with calming down my nerves…<</if>> Thankfully it's not too long of a trip to traverse the valleys and reach the halfling capital. A chill runs down my spine as the caravan heads closer to the city. The roads seem to be more of an obstacle course as random crystal geodes and chasms seem to have randomly appeared through the ground, and then it slowly dawns on me, that the Escherians' worst fear seem to have come true. And then we see it. Gasps ripple through the caravan as Cellador—or at least the remains of Cellador—appears on the horizon. Towering plumes of smoke have consumed the once great capital, and even the giant sequoia tree city is dwarfed by the twisted amalgamation of rocks that has erupted and divided the city in half. And I have a feeling… this isn't even the worst of it. <<linkreplace "Continue">> The worldquake isn't supposed to happen for twenty more cycles when I first left. In a way, it was inevitable, but to have happened suddenly, I can see why even the most devout have lost faith in The Three Sisters. It was supposed to happen every one hundred cycles, but if it happened now, there's no telling when the next one will happen. I can only imagine what kind of anomalies… AnACHRONiSTS… would let this happen. And now I'm almost grateful that the people in my world only lost memories of me, and… whatever happened to $mc and our <<if $likeskids is true>>children<<else>>little gremlins<</if>>. ---- * <<link "I feel sick. I had friends here too." "escheria12">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Guys? Please tell me you have good news.\"" "escheria12">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Phyrnne? I think I'll take up your offer on the therapy session.\"" "escheria12">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> * <<link "\"This must be a normal Thursday for you guys, right?\"" "escheria12">><<set $text to 4>><</link>> <</linkreplace>>

<<if $text == 1>>"Hello? I… I don't think I can handle this anymore." D's voice crackles through the speaker. "You're telling me."<<elseif $text == 2>>"Whatever you're seeing there right now…" Jessica's voice cracks. "Actually, I don't wanna know."<<elseif $text == 3>>Phyrnne's voice crackles through the speaker. "I... I do not blame you."<<else>>Phyrnne's voice crackles through the speaker. "I... I assure you, it is not."<</if>> And the fact that no one else speaks after, is very telling. It's even worse when I finally reach the sunless forest floor of the city. What was once full of birds chirping and warbling is now replaced by the sounds of screaming and children crying. There are still parts where the light shines through the thick canopy, but it is nowhere near enough to repel the chaotic atmosphere. "Greetings, can I—?" I try asking someone about what happened, only for them to ignore me and storm off. I try a couple more times, but it's clear that I can't get anything useful here like this. I'm almost overwhelmed about what else to do, when I remember the one place I can always find reliable information, the Galloping <<cycle "$tavern">> <<option "[Griffin]" "Griffin">> <<option "[Giraffe]" "Giraffe">> <<option "[Gazelle]" "Gazelle">> <<option "[Gorilla]" "Gorilla">> <</cycle>>. It's on the fourth understory of the tree with a mushroom bridge, and it's unmissable even from the forest floor. <<button "Continue" "escheria13">><</button>>

I break into a sprint as the layout of the city slowly comes back to me, and sure enough, I spot the tree in the distance. A little bent, but still standing. With a rush of renewed hope, I dodge through broken barrels, collapsed aqueducts, and fallen branch platforms, to look for a working cable car station… and to my surprise, one of the cable lines seem to be working still. There's a long line of halflings and dwarves waiting, but considering what's happening, it's almost a miracle. A portly, male dwarf at the back of the line is clutching and petting a green, Caeshirean pigling as he takes deep breaths, whispering, "Augustus… Augustus…" I tap his shoulder. "Um, excuse me?" "Do you know where Augustus is?" he asks, not even bothering to look at me as he continues to pet the equally terrified pigling. "I've been looking for //bijou// since this started and I still haven't seen him. He was right there with me!" "I…" I glance to the side, and notice a letter 'A' tattooed on his arm. He's not just looking for whoever Augustus is, he's looking for his heartbound—his husband. I obviously have no idea who or where he is, but that doesn't I mean I don't know the answer. ---- * <<link "I break the fourth wall and tell him that Augustus is safe." "escheria14">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "Augustus is safe. It's not worth breaking protocol for that." "escheria14">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "I offer some dwarpnip I pocketed from the cart to calm him down." "escheria14">><<set $text to 3>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>He suddenly regains focus and finally turns to look at me. "H-how? How do you know…?" "I… I remember seeing him earlier, but—" "Do you know where he is?" "I'm sorry, I don't know where he is now, but he's safe." "Oh, thank Arda!" He smooshes his cheek with the pigling's. "I'll… I'll go look for him in our meeting place. May the flowers, kind stranger." "And to you, as well." I whisper, as he happily trots away with his pet. That may not have been the right thing to do, but it is for me.<<elseif $text == 2>>"It's alright, Fifteen-Poundy." He continues to frantically pet the squealing pigling, but I really can't justify telling him. It'll only worsen things.<<else>>The dwarf glances at me, then stares at the fragrant herbs as drool starts to form at the corner of his mouth—but he quickly slaps it away, and storms off sobbing with his pigling. Well… that didn't work out like I hoped. i just wanted him to calm down.<</if>> I wait in line for a couple more minutes, but with only a couple of working cable cars and one water wheel powering it, the line has barely moved at all, and it'll probably take me an hour if not a couple just waiting. And I don't think I can handle an hour of waiting here helplessly. ---- <<if $clothes == "suit">> * <<link "Use the suit's cloaking and sneak into the cable car." "escheria15">><<set $text to 1>><<set $impersonate to false>><</link>> <<else>> * If only I had worn the suit... The cloak would come in really handy right now.<</if>> * <<link "Use my illusion amulet and pretend to be the Broodmother—the governing head of Cellador." "escheria15">><<set $text to 2>><<set $impersonate to true>><</link>> * <<link "\"Lorem? Do you have fireworks? I need your help to cause a distraction.\"" "escheria15">><<set $text to 3>><<set $impersonate to false>><</link>> * I don't have any money to throw away.

<<if $text == 1>>I break off from the line and hide out of sight behind a trunk, before activating the suit's cloak. I quietly sneak to the front of the line and wait patiently for the next cable car basket to arrive. Once everyone has gotten off, I deactivate the cloak just as the mini-stampede of dwarves and halflings rush for the tiny opening. It's incredibly cramped with half of the passengers not even sitting, but I'm not in a position to complain. It's the boring solution, but it's effective.<<elseif $text == 2>>I break off from the line and hide out of sight behind a trunk, and try to imagine what Pollyana Sturnidae looks like from my memory, then maybe make her look a smidge older just to be safe. I'm not even sure if she's still the Broodmother, but hopefully that shouldn't be much of a problem. She was beloved by almost everyone since my last visit. "Greetings, my fellow Avians," I say as I approach the front of the line. "May I have the next basket? I am needed at the understories." Thankfully, no one bats an eye at my illusion, and a bunch of people part to make way for me. A couple stubbornly stand their ground, but there's more than enough space. "Oh, Broodmother Sturnidae, can you please help us?" a halfling woman pleads. "I am doing all that I can, but I am much more needed elsewhere at the moment. Please understand." "Have you decided to get pollinated yet?" someone from the crowd shouts. "A lot of us are available, just chirping." There's a quiet murmuring of chuckles, but fortunately not much more. "Oh, shut your beak, you figpecker!" a halfling woman beside me chirrups back. "Just because she's a broodmother doesn't mean she needs to bear any nestlings!" Several others murmur in agreement. "Thank you," I say. It's nice to hear that she's still respected here in Cellador. "May the birds be with us all in these trying times." The cable car basket arrives soon after, but the other passengers make sure I'm sitting comfortably. It's still incredibly cramped with half of the passengers not even sitting, but I'm not in a position to complain. I greet all of them once more when I get off, but fortunately no one decided to stick and accompany me. Once I'm sure that the other passengers are out of sight, I revert back to my former illusion.<<else>><<type 20ms>>"Mm-hmm. Go on, I'm listening."<</type>> "Do you see my location? I need you to launch some fireworks under the canopy. Can you do that without burning anything?" <<type 20ms>>"What do you think? Of course I can!" Lorem says as if I've said something offensive.<</type>> "Wait for my signal," I say, and wait for the next cable car basket to arrive… "Now!" <<type 20ms>>"I'll roll the dice to see how many fireworks I will—ooh, it's twenty!"<</type>> And not a moment too soon, bright flashes of red, yellow, and blue start illuminating the dark canopies of Cellador. The forest grows silent as everyone points at the sudden light show. It's a stunning sight to behold, but I force myself to break off of it and dodge through the distracted dwarves and halflings towards the front of the mini-stampede trying to get through the basket's small opening. <<type 20ms>>"You like that, $nn?"<</type>> "That was great," I whisper through the comms as I take my seat. "Thanks. I owe you one, Lorem." It's incredibly cramped with half of the passengers not even sitting, but I'm not in a position to complain.<</if>> The upper floors of the city always had a better view, but instead of the colorful foliage, fungi, and decorations embellishing the city, it's only giving me a better view of the chaos and the destruction happening around me… I close my eyes and take another deep breath to reorient myself. There's makeshift hanging wooden and vine bridges uniting the trees, but there's none directly connecting to the Galloping $tavern's trunk from here. There //is// a zipline, but with the tilted angle of the platform I'm standing on… am I brave or stupid enough to risk my life here? ---- * <<link "Story world logic states that the line will snap off just as I reach the other side. Let's do it." "escheria16">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "No thanks. Riding an unsafe cable car is already terrifying enough for me." "escheria16">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> <<if $flight == true>> * If only I could just break my illusion and fly... <<else>> * If only I picked a race that could fly... <</if>>

<<cacheaudio "dark" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/la5zf9alcgllmpk/darkfog_f.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "childhood">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> <<if $text == 1>>It's not the first time I've used one of these, so it doesn't take me long to secure the straps around me. I give it a couple of good tugs to make sure that it's sturdy enough to hold me… with a deep breath, I push myself off and take the plunge. The wind whips by my face, and for a moment, I feel the gloomy atmosphere fade around me. But it's over too soon. The line surprisingly held strong, and with the rush of adrenaline, I unstrap myself for the zipline… only for it to finally snap. Well, my prediction is off, but I'm not gonna complain about that.<<else>>Some of the hanging bridges are still a little too… treacherous for my tastes, but it's way better than the zipline. All I have to do is not look below right? //Don't look below.// And slowly but surely, I finally reach safety.<</if>> <<linkreplace "Continue">>The Galloping $tavern is a lot busier than I expected. But when I enter it's wooden flappy doors, it's not drunk patrons, but the injured occupying almost every corner of the establishment. There's a crying halfling child in the corner, maybe about sixteen cycles old, sitting on the floor beside a halfling woman covered in a white blanket. "Please… please don't go…" The child nudges the woman, clutching a brown handbag. "We still have a surprise for Papa, remember?" I inch closer toward them, and notice that the woman is deathly pale. She's… she's not going to last much longer… But what's more heartbreaking is the handbag. Embroidered on the side is the name, P. Sulidae. It's the woman Adelar was looking for. "Lorem?" I whisper as I head back out of the establishment. "You have any info on Prunella Sulidae?" <<type 20ms>>"Hold on a sec, honey. I'm processing Jessie's request. Mm-hmm, okay, resolved. Prunella Sulidae, you say?"<</type>> "She's not supposed to die yet, is she?" <<type 20ms>>"Bingo. Well, it's not much of a consolation. Her canon death date is only a couple weeks from now."<</type>><<button "Continue" "escheria17">><</button>> <</linkreplace>>

My heart sinks. The canonical thing to do would be to let the mother live. But would it be the right thing when her time on this world is limited anyway? She might get to see Adelar again, but I don't know if I want to give them false hope. Alternatively, I could break protocol and alter Sulidae's records. She's just a minor background character. I don't think anyone would notice. <<linkreplace "Continue">> Well, this is probably why CANon had me take the Milgram Test. <<timed 3s t8n>>Good thing there's no time restrictions, huh?<</timed>> ---- * <<link "\"Lorem, add her name to the list of anomalies RetCon needs to fix.\" Tampering with the canon is what allowed this disaster to happen in the first place." "escheria18">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Lorem, can you alter her records? Let's move her death date a year earlier.\" At least this way her family would've already moved on." "escheria18">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Lorem, can you alter her records? Let's move her death date a month later.\"" "escheria18">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> * <<link "\"Lorem, can you alter her records? Let's move her death date a year later.\"" "escheria18">><<set $text to 4>><</link>> <</linkreplace>>

<<if $text == 1>><<type 20ms>>"Roger, $name." Then it changes its voice to a whisper. "But Is that what you really want to do? Or is it because you wanted to get a different ending?"<</type>><<elseif $text == 2>><<type 20ms>>"Roger, $name."<</type>> "Wait, you actually would?" <<type 20ms>>"I'm not here to regulate that mumbo jumbo. Or at least, Jess programmed me not to. Go ask her, not me." Then it changes its voice to a whisper. "Is that what you really want to do? Or is it because you wanted to get a different ending?"<</type>><<elseif $text == 3>><<type 20ms>>"Roger, $name."<</type>> "Wait, you actually would?" <<type 20ms>>"I'm not here to regulate that mumbo jumbo. Or at least, Jess programmed me not to. Go ask her, not me." Then it changes its voice to a whisper. "Is that what you really want to do? Or is it because you wanted to get a different ending?"<</type>><<else>><<type 20ms>>"Roger, $name."<</type>> "Wait, you actually would?" <<type 20ms>>"I'm not here to regulate that mumbo jumbo. Or at least, Jess programmed me not to. Go ask her, not me." Then it changes its voice to a whisper. "Is that what you really want to do? Or is it because you wanted to get a different ending?"<</type>><</if>> <<linkreplace "Continue">>I pause for a moment. Is that really what I'm doing…? <<type 20ms>>"Whoa, don't go philosophical on me there, buddy. It's just a rhetorical question. Carry on."<</type>> [[Well, that's definitely something.|escheria19]] <</linkreplace>>

I take a peek back inside the tavern, and for once, I see a welcome sight. Looks like my hunch is right all along. Not only is the tavern owner here, but Broodmother Polly is actually right here, tending to the wounded along with several other Avian priestesses. <<if $impersonate == true>>Let's hope she doesn't find out I impersonated her.<<else>>Good thing I didn't impersonate her earlier.<</if>> "Greetings," the dwarven tavern owner says when she spots me by the entrance. "Do you need any help too? You don't seem hurt at all." I give her a second or too get a good look at me, but it's clear that she doesn't recognize me. ---- * <<link "\"You mean you don't recognize me anymore, Pistachia?\"" "escheria20">><</link>> * <<link "\"Come on, Pistachia. Is that how you treat your old friend?\"" "escheria20">><</link>> * <<link "\"I'm not hurt, but I still need your help, Miss Vera.\"" "escheria20">><</link>>

And just when I thought that nobody remembers me too in the other worlds, she smiles and almost jumps in delight. "$nn! Oh my, it's been so long since your last visit, I… what happened?" I scratch my head. "I think I should be the one asking that…" "Come on, let's head to the back." She turns around. "Polly! You wouldn't believe who I found!" The esteemed broodmother follows us a moment later into one of the reserved rooms. "$name? Is that you?" I smile and perform the bird hand gesture and flap twice outward. "Greetings, Broodmother Pollyana Sturnidae." She waves her hand dismissively. "And to you. But I'm not Broodmother anymore, silly. You've… been away from a long while, huh?" "So it seems." Pistachia says, offering me a <<cycle "$bev">> <<option "[cup of healing tea]" "finish the tea">> <<option "[glass of mockingbird tequila]" "down the rest of the tequila">> <</cycle>>. She then takes a seat, carressing her belly. It seems she has found someone lucky to pollinate with. I take a sip of the refreshing beverage—it's just what I needed. "Thank you, Tachia. But that's not important. I'm not going to stay here for long." Polly's smile fades. "I'm assuming it's because of the worldquake?" I nod, the smile gone from my face too. "Do you know why it just happened suddenly? Did you notice anything unusual before it happened?" "I'm afraid I do not have any idea. I was at D' Warblings Camp celebrating Uncle's daughter's hatching day the other night… but there was indeed something peculiar…" <<button "\"Go on.\"" "escheria21">><</button>>

She smiles once more. "A bunch of young, tall halflings arrived at the camp that morning. Dumpling and I brought them here just this morning to see the new broodmother." "Because…?" She glances around the room and covers her mouth. "One of them was bearing one of the //FIVE GOLDEN RINGS!!!//" I cover my mouth as well, trying not to burst out in laughter, but Pistachia doesn't even bother covering hers. It is impossible to say that phrase without singing it out loud. "Can you describe them more? How tall are were they, exactly?" "Two of them were taller than any dwarf or halfling I have ever seen, and one of them was almost twice as tall as us! And from the way they acted, they didn't seem elderly at all! They were free of wrinkles and gray hair unlike yours truly. From how tall they were, I almost thought that The Three Sisters might have finally lifted the Curse of the First Intervention…" She stares at the injured people through the octagonal, open door. "But it seems I am mistaken." Jackpot. [[There's no doubt, they're the AnACHRONiSTS we're looking for.|escheria22]]

"They were a delightful bunch," she continues. "I wish they are alive and well." "I can imagine. Do you know where they are right now?" "I… Dumpling and I went on a caravan ride with them last night towards Mt. Bundoc to meet President Fargesia to discuss about the rings, and… And then it happened." "Why are you so curious about these fellows?" Pistachia asks. "Do you know them?" "Not exactly, but I am trying to find them." "Something else happened before that, actually. Yesterday morning when we visited here for Dumpling's weekly shopping, something attacked Cellador. <<if $genre == 1>>Black hooded beings with swords, bows, and staves. Some of them were even riding black horses. It was nothing like we've seen before."<<elseif $genre == 2>>Fairies. Dark, malevolent fairies. I can't explain it, but there was something sinister about their magic. It was nothing like we've seen before."<<elseif $genre == 3>>Large mechanical beings. At first I thought they were rogue clockworks from MetroKnome, but they were something the gnomes have never seen before."<<elseif $genre == 4>>Large monsters. Some of them were giants that had only one eye, and some of them were creatures that looked like an unholy combination of animals that shouldn't exist. It was nothing like we've seen before."<<elseif $genre == 5>>Malevolent spirits, undead beings. I wish I could say they came from the Gub'bat Forest but... it's almost like they emerged here from Cellador. It was nothing like we've seen before."<<elseif $genre == 6>>Tall hooded men wearing long, dark coats, wielding firearms that the gnomes at MetroKnome have never seen before."<<elseif $genre == 7>>Tall and large dwarves and halflings—I'm not even sure if we can even call them that anymore. Some of them have unnatural speed and strength, and some of them have unusual magic, like the capability to control objects with their mind. It was nothing like we've seen before."<<else>>Tall, masked men wearing suits with a large letter 'A' printed of them. They were wielding firearms that the gnomes at MetroKnome have never seen before."<</if>> Wait… it's the villains from my story? That can't be right. Why would they suddenly attack Escheria? Didn't they want a sequel to our story too? "But I'm afraid I can't help you any more than that. Plenty of people still need healing… but if it helps you find them, we were traveling along Gub'bat Forest before we got separated from them." "I understand." I $bev before standing up and giving her the farewell gesture once more. "I wish I can stay much longer, but I need to go find them." "Then don't let us stop you. May the birds be with you, $name." Pistachia waves. "Come back anytime. You know you're always welcome here." ---- * <<link "\"Thank you, Polly and Pistachia. Farewell.\"" "escheria23">><</link>> * <<link "\"No promises, but I hope I'll find the chance to return again.\"" "escheria23">><</link>> * <<link "\"The next one's on the birdhouse when I return.\"" "escheria23">><</link>> * <<link "\"I can't wait to meet the little one when they're born, Tachia.\"" "escheria23">><</link>> * <<link "I give both of them a quick farewell hug. \"I wish I could stay longer, but I really must go now.\"" "escheria23">><</link>> * <<link "I just give them a wave, and go." "escheria23">><</link>>

Once I'm out of the tavern, I contact the squad immediately. "<<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[Hayden]">> <<option "[Hayds]">> <<option "[Heidi]">> <</cycle>>, I just found out where the anomalies were last spotted." "Roger," Hayden squawks a few seconds later. "Do you have specifics?" "Negative, but I got in touch with the former broodmother of Cellador. She said she was on a caravan ride with them along Gub'bat Forest near the Uncanny Valley. It's your run-of-the-mill scary haunted forest on the way to Mt. Bundoc, you can't miss it." "Broodmother? Is that some kind of high-ranking official?" "The highest, yes." "That's not good. That means they interacted with important characters. Lorem, fetch me coordinates. Good job, $name." ---- * <<link "\"Thank you, sir.\"" "escheria24">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Just doing my part.\"" "escheria24">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Not bad for my first mission, huh?\"" "escheria24">><<set $text to 3>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>"Keep it up. We'll be done with this mission in no time."<<elseif $text == 2>>"Don't act like that's nothing. If we finish this mission quickly, it'll be because of you."<<else>>"Must be beginner's luck," D says. "Huh? Oh no, kiddo, I was just talking to my imaginary fr—"<</if>> "How is everyone else doing?" Phyrnne asks. "Jess and I are about done here." <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST (V.O.) D and I are doing… mostly fine. We also got some information about the anomalies.</div> "Go find somewhere remote for Lorem to pick you up. Let's rendezvous at the forest." <<type 20ms>>"Finally," Lorem says. "I'm sick of waiting alone in the ship. I can only entertain myself listening to the NLSS podcast for so long."<</type>> Everyone echoes their confirmation, and the call ends. Cellador isn't pretty far from the valley, so maybe I can beat them there if I hurry up. Thankfully you don't need to wait for any cable cars if you need to descend to the forest floor. There's a water slide that spirals around almost every major tree trunk. This tree's slide doesn't have running water anymore, but from the small line waiting for their turn, it must be safe still. After landing on a giant leaf pile, [[I set my eyes towards the forsaken valley.|escheria25]]

<<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><</timed>><</if>> I reach the outskirts of the city, and conveniently enough, I spot a band of dwarves and gnomes offering a free caravan ride to Mt. Bundoc and MetroKnome on their Ardan elephants and feathered raptors. The ride is mostly quiet, save for the elephants' occasional trumpets, unlike the Cellador caravans with accompanying dwarf-halfling orchestras that I'm used to. As we travel, I realize that Cellador actually got lucky—there's a lot more fallen trees, as well as fissures and outcroppings that have formed along the now unpaved roads. It must be terrifying to have experienced it, but I can't deny that there's also a sense of beauty along the oddly patterned geological deformations that shouldn't even exist yet. Every geological feature that's in this world was a result of all the previous worldquakes, after all. They were generous enough to offer us some food rations as well for lunch and afterbrunch. It's been a while since I've been here, and I almost forgot that the halflings have about ten eating sessions everyday. They don't eat much, but they do sure eat often. The caravan stops when we encounter the Mobius River, or more accurately, the <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[wide crevasse]">> <<option "[narrow crevice]">> <</cycle>> where the new Mobius River decided to flow this time. A small airship and several ornithopters parked nearby means there's already a team of gnomes and dwarves working to construct a new bridge, but I take the distraction to [[slip away into Gub'bat forest.|escheria26]]

<<cacheaudio "winter" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/nsn552i1tp20lyg/winterswish_f.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "dark">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> "Hayden, you found anything yet?" I ask as I traverse through the misty and gloomy forest, <<cycle "$wearillusion">> <<option "[my illusion still on]" 1>> <<option "[back to my normal-looking self]" 2>> <</cycle>>. "I don't think I need to tell you what happens here when the sun sets." "You almost here? I found the caravan a while ago. Hurry up, Lorem just picked up Jess and Phyrnne. They should be here any moment now." "I'm at the forest. Can you point me to your direction?" "Hold up. Tell me if you can hear my howl." And sure enough, I hear his howling a few seconds later. Yup. He's really enjoying it. "I can hear you loud and clear." "Alright. I'll howl for you every so often. Would hate for you to become actual wolf food." And so, I creep through the forest quietly, glancing behind me occasionally. Even with the comforting feeling that it's just Hayden howling in the distance, I get the feeling there's someone watching me, and not just the reader reading right now. ---- * <<link "I've never actually been through here before, despite my long stay here in Escheria. That's gotta be just atmospheric, right?" "escheria27">><</link>> * <<link "I've actually explored at night here before, even if it wasn't part of the job. And let me tell you, it's not just a folktale." "escheria27">><</link>>

It gets even unsettling the farther I go in. There's abandoned water wells and trees with hanging dolls, and even worse, about half of the trees and shrubbery have burned down—and judging from the smell of rotten eggs, it could only mean one thing. Mt. Bundoc erupted too. A couple minutes later, I finally spot the caravan Polly was talking about, or at least the remains of it. There's broken wheels, shattered firefly lanterns, and smashed guitars. All across the forest floor. It was the perfect storm of disasters. The worldquake and the eruption most likely disturbed the spirits that died here in the Battle of the Burning Boughs. "Took your time getting here." <<button "Continue" "escheria28">><</button>>

<<if $emotional == true>>Oh, thank goodness it's just Hayden, back in his werewolf form. My soul almost left me. He snickers at my reaction. "I didn't even try scaring you."<<else>>Of course it's just Hayden, back in his werewolf form. He thinks he can just spook me like that? I don't think so. He smirks at my reaction. "Thought I'd get ya."<</if>> "Where's everyone?" "You're just in time, actually," he says as he starts walking towards a small clearing. "They just arrived a minute ago." <<if $bev == "down the rest of the tequila">>"Wait, did you have some alcohol?" "How did you—" Right. He's a fourth wall-breaking werewolf. "You're not taking this mission seriously, are you?" He huffs. "Don't worry, I've been there. But in this job, it's better to keep sharp and alert. You never know when anomalies will attack."<</if>> I follow Werewolf-Hayden towards an overturned cart lying precariously near a ravine, where the rest of the squad is waiting, with Jess and Rnst back to their normal forms. <<if $wearillusion == 1>>D grins at me. "You really like that illusion, huh?" "Oh." I suppose it doesn't make sense to keep it up if everyone else hasn't. "You didn't have to, I was just saying…"<</if>> <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Alright, what are we looking at here?</div> "I think this is the last spot the anomalies were before they went into a plot hole into another world." Hayden pulls out a zipper plastic bag from his lab coat. "I found a couple of cake keychains, a grape soda bottle cap, and an old one-centavo coin from modern-day Lungsod City. Phyrnne?" "The emotional trails do stop in this area." Phyrnne hovers around the wreckage—and gasps. "I don't think the AnACHRONiSTS intended for this to happen. They were on the run from something else. And… and this was not the first time they were being pursued." "I think I know what they were running from," I say. "The villains from my story. Broodmother Polly told me they attacked Cellador before the quakes happened. Or it sounds like they were from my story, at least. They were missing in my story world too." "Wait, we're tracking down two sets of anomalies now?" D says. "D***. We're finally getting missions on our paygrade." I sigh. ---- * <<link "\"I guess they wanted a sequel more badly than me? But why do it in a different world?\"" "escheria29">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"But why didn't they capture me instead? I'm not the main character.\"" "escheria29">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Well, they're villains. I shouldn't have expected much.\"" "escheria29">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> * <<link "\"At least we're hitting two birds with one stone. We find the anomalies, we probably find the villains in my story too.\"" "escheria29">><<set $text to 4>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>Jessica sighs as well. "Maybe they attacked Escheria because they knew you lived here." <<elseif $text == 2>>Jessica sighs as well. "Maybe they wisened up? Or… maybe you've been promoted to co-protagonist." I shrug. That's nice, but one of the benefits of being the deuteragonist is… well, there's a lot less pressure on me. <<elseif $text == 2>> Jessica sighs as well. "Just one more reason to stop them, I guess." <<else>>Jessica sighs as well. "Let's hope so."<</if>> "D, Rnst. What did you learn from the camp?" "Witnesses from the refugee camp were all telling us that there were eight new arrivals at the camp the other day." D smiles. "Oh, and that they were fun to play with. Several of the dwarf and halfling children I talked to had a lot of fun playing with some of them during the camp founder's daughter's… hatching day?" I chuckle. "Birthday." "And they celebrate them every two Earth years? Man, that's a lot of birthdays." "That's different, actually. Everyone ages simultaneously—a single cycle is as long as the time it takes for the Mobius River to…" I glance at everyone and scratch my head. "Sorry. Old habits die hard, I guess." <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST No worries, I totally understand. You can nerd all about them with us after the mission. (beat) Anyway, they all reported conflicting ages, but consensus is that <<if $twinbody == "chubby">>five<<else>>three<</if>> of the anomalies were quite pudgy, and they all seem to be relatively young, despite two of them being abnormally tall.</div> "Maybe tall for the dwarves and halflings," D comments. "but definitely not to me." "Then it's the same anomalies Broodmother Polly was talking about," I say. "She described them as a 'delightful bunch' as well." <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST We also received conflicting reports for the anomalies' apparent genders. Either 5 male and 3 female, or 4 male and 4 female. Either way, I think that's enough physical description for us to know if we've got the right group.</div> <<button "Continue" "escheria30">><</button>>

"And how was the trip to MetroKnome, Jess, Phyrnne?" Jessica seems to be a little distracted examining the broken cart and the surrounding flora, so Phyrnne replies instead. "Jess and I actually found a few survivors from this caravan. D and Rny's descriptions check out with what we gathered, but did any of the witnesses at the camp mention the anomalies arriving through a… truck or something similar?" <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Not to my knowledge. I definitely wouldn't forget a detail like that.</div> "Hmm…" D rubs their chin. "I did talk to the camp founder. He seems to have lost someone. He was drunk and inconsolable, but I did hear him mention something like a talking tree and a large metal contraption or something when I asked about the anomalies. Couldn't find anything like that nearby so I thought that was just his imagination." "Yes," Phyrnne says. "We are not sure if it was a truck, but they described it as a large metallic vehicle with wheels. Some of the gnomes we talked to said some engineers got a hold of it for repairs since it seems to be no longer working anymore, but they went to other places to help construct new bridges after the quake." "I did see some gnomes with airships constructing bridges on the way here," I say. "And… the talking tree might not be his imagination. I've met some treants before, but they probably left this area when Mt. Bundoc erupted." "We also learned that they had flowers, trinkets, a ukulele…" Phyrnne furrows her brows. "And some bamboozles?—most likely bought from Cellador." "Toy guns made from bamboo," I say. "That would support my theory that they're just anomalies who accidentally got lost from their own stories, not AnACHRONiSTS," Phyrnne continues. "I just cannot see why they would want to cause destruction here willingly, especially if they were a friendly bunch. The variety of items they have bought seem to indicate that they just wanted to try a lot of things that would be new for them." ---- * <<link "Man, there's barely any choices in this section, huh?" "escheria31">><</link>> * <<link "Right, right. Don't break the fourth wall too much." "escheria31">><</link>>

"That makes sense. How about you, Jess? Are you… okay there?" "Actually, we learned about the truck while I was shopping around MetroKnome for Lorem's parts." Hayden's werewolf ears turn at her direction. "Mind sharing them with the class?" "Oh!" Jessica's eyes light up. "I, um, got these deployable nets." She turns to me as she retracts her bionic fingers and loads one up inside the hole of her wrist. "You were right about bird catching being a popular sport. They were pretty cheap so I got a bunch of them. Might come in handy." "Did you get the toys and trinkets I requested too?" D asks. "Of course. Anything for you." "Sweet! I bet the children at the CPO would love the clockwork toys. I could kiss you right now." Jess turns away from D, clearly the reaction they were hoping. "I got my earth rune fixed too," she says as she traces the runic inscriptions around the wrist of her bionic arm with her fingers. "I was surprised that some of the gnomes actually practice runic magic. Turns out I got one of the lines angled incorrectly." <<if $pee == false>>"Woah, you can perform runic magic?" I ask. "I thought the runes on your wrist were just decorative and not functional." "Maybe you'll get the chance to see it in action later."<</if>> "Good work, everyone." Hayden claps his paws twice as he heads up the ship's ramp. "I think we have enough information to decide our next destination." <<button "Continue" "escheria32">><</button>>

We all gather back up in the bridge, where Lorem displays ten different story worlds in a large holographic screen—each with their own plot holes. <<type 20ms>>"Here are all the anomaly reports I received while you were all busy with your little fieldtrip."<</type>> <<if $introvert == true>>Wow, that's a lot.<<else>>"Wow, that's a lot."<</if>> Everyone starts silently examining the worlds, and I guess I have no choice but to try and predict what world the anomalies went to next. <<linkreplace "Here's what we know so far:">>Here's what we know so far: * Eight anomalies arrived at the refugee camp the other day through a large vehicle * Two of them were much taller than the others * They were friendly, especially towards children * They went to Cellador the next day and bought flowers, trinkets, and all sorts of novelty items * The villains from my story chased them * They escaped through a plot hole in the haunted forest * They left behind items from modern Earth * They caused the worldquake in Escheria to happen prematurely, resulting in Mt. Bundoc erupting So… which of these worlds did they most likely go to? ---- * <<link "RomCom with a hostage situation" "escheria33">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "Eastern film background characters replaced with characters from an old Western film" "escheria33">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "Action-adventure with missing macguffin" "escheria33">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "Hospital drama haunted by a mischievous poltergeist" "escheria33">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "Fairytale forest swept over by a tsunami" "escheria33">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "Urban fantasy hidden supernatural world exposed to the public" "escheria33">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "Slice-of-life story with a sudden cheese shortage" "escheria33">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "Coming of age story bullies suddenly befriending the protagonist" "escheria33">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "Dystopian sci-fi with a successful resistance movement" "escheria33">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "Historical drama with talking animals" "escheria33">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "You know what? I'll just head back to the couch at the corner. I have no idea." "escheria33">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> <</linkreplace>>

<<if $text == 1>>"I don't think so," Hayden says. "The fairytale forest is more likely. There's a clear connection between that and the haunted forest, and tsunamis are often caused by earthquakes. And none of the other plot holes are as extreme as the quakes in Escheria." I guess that makes sense… <<elseif $text == 2>>"You're learning fast, $name." Hayden smiles ever so slightly. "Fantasy and fairytale forest is a clear connection between the two worlds, and tsunamis are often caused by earthquakes. And none of the other plot holes are as extreme as the quakes in Escheria." D nudges me. "Look at you getting the hang of it already." <<else>>"You'll get used to it," Jessica says as she sits nearby. "It's a little overwhelming for me too." "The fairytale forest seems most likely." Hayden says. "There's a clear connection between that and the fantasy forest, and tsunamis are often caused by earthquakes. And none of the other plot holes are as extreme as the quakes in Escheria."<</if>> <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Yes, although I propose we go to either the urban fantasy or the action-adventure next if we're wrong.</div> Hayden clicks his tongue. "We absolutely will be going to them with that attitude, Rnst." "Aww," D frowns. "It would've fun to see the historical and hospital dramas." "Wouldn't you?" Hayden smirks. "We'll see if those haven't been fixed yet when we finish this one." <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST I hope the tsunami isn't too bad. (sighs at Phyrnne) The last one wasn't fun at all.</div> Phyrnne places her hand on her shoulder. "It's okay, Rny." <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST I know we reversed it, but all those poor souls… I can still hear them all calling and crying out to me in my dreams.</div> <<button "Continue" "wland1">><</button>>

<<set $chapter to "Book 2, Chapter 3">> !$title !!Book 2, Chapter 3 <<timed 2s t8n>><<type 20ms>>"Buckle up, boys." Lorem takes off the other story worlds and zooms in towards the fairytale world. "Shouldn't take too long to reach from our position." ''Destination:'' WanderLand ''Story World Genre:'' Fractured Fairytales ''Anomaly Threat Level:'' Don't Let It Go ''Bibliographical Coordinates:'' ''X:'' 16234.333 ''Y:'' 558534.33 ''Z:'' 8796.3<</type>> ---- * <<link "I didn't expect to do quite well for my first mission." "wland2">><</link>> * <<link "This seems like the perfect job for me." "wland2">><</link>> * <<link "I never expected it to be this stressful." "wland2">><</link>> * <<link "I think I'm going back to being a biblioanthropologist after all this... I'd rather explore the story worlds at my own pace." "wland2">><</link>> <</timed>>

<<if $text == 3>>The rest of the squad takes their places on the reading corner.<<else>>I take a seat on the reading corner, and rest my feet.<</if>> I stare at the ship's windows to clear my mind, but the dark canvas of faraway stars and planets slowly fade out as a stream of rainbow lights envelop the ship—grandfather clocks, pianos, and unicorn cows in ballerina outfits whipping by instead of the usual comets and asteroids. //"Mooooo!"// I don't really know what to expect when we're visiting a flooded fairytale forest, <<if $clothes == "nighties">>but I imagine it'll be quite cold. ---- * <<link "Ugh, I hate the cold. This is the perfect time to change into something more sensible." "wland3">><<set $clothes to "suit">><</link>> * <<link "Nah, I'm not gonna let a little cold make me get out of my $nighties. The cold never bothered me anyway." "wland3">><</link>> <<else>>but I'm glad the suit has an built-in temperature regulator. I imagine it'll be quite cold. <<button "Continue" "wland3">><</button>> <</if>>

<<type 20ms>>"Aaaand we're here!" Lorem announces. "Wow, this is not what I… expected. I promise I followed the exact coordinates, Jess!"<</type>> The ship lands. And if the fact that we landed on something isn't worrying enough, the entry ramp opens with a robotic EEEEE KA-THUNK, and <<if $clothes == "nighties">> almost immediately I regret staying in my $nighties as<</if>> a sudden blast of arctic wind buffets us all in the face. We clamber down the ramp one by one… and sure enough, it is the fairytale forest—below zero. Lollipop and cotton candy trees are buried in snow and blocks of frozen ice, and if I didn't know where we were going, I would think we just arrived in ice cream land. "Well…" Hayden sniffs the surroundings. "This is quite unexpected. Was the tsunami report wrong then?" <<button "Continue" "wland4">><</button>>

<<cacheaudio "dialogue" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/jx7zv03jnfp3cyr/sentimentaldialogue_f.ogg?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "winter">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> Lorem send out a tiny FOOBAR drone outfitted with glittery fairy wings outside the ship. <<type 20ms>>"Hold on, I'm the confirming the report," Lorem says. "But my sensors are telling me that might not be necessary…" Lorem starts flying into the distance.<</type>> "Hey!" Jessica calls out and follows the fairy FOOBAR drone. "Wait up!" The squad and I follow the two of them, and slowly, we hear a woman humming in the distance. We all follow the entrancing sound as we scan the area for any signs of characters. ---- * <<link "This is a fairytale world if I've ever seen one." "wland5">><</link>> * <<link "The anomalies are more dangerous than I thought." "wland5">><</link>> * <<link "Yeah, I think Lorem's broken." "wland5">><</link>> * <<link "Well, it's not implausible to think that the resulting flood from the tsunami could have frozen." "wland5">><</link>>

"Guys, over hereee!" We hear Jessica call out. Has she found the anomalies already? We start following her voice through the snowy fog, but then it slowly dissipates, and the sun starts shining overhead. Except… it's not quite the sun. We all stare—yes, stare—at it for a good few seconds, before it starts giggling at us. The sun has the face of a baby. But perhaps the most surprising part is it doesn't seem to be an anomaly. "Uh, hello?" Jessica's voice breaks us out of our surprise. When we turn our heads to her direction, we spot a tall woman in white standing beside her. She must be the one responsible for this blizzard. "TARDIS Agents? About time CANon sent someone to fix this mess." <<button "Continue" "wland6">><</button>>

"Wait," I say as I jog across towards her. "Do you work for CANon too?" She barely glances at my direction. "Not quite." <<type 20ms>>FOOBAR hovers beside the woman as it scans her body from head to toe. "Verifying AnACHRONiST records. Wait for it, wait for it… Registration confirmed."<</type>> Oh. She is a public domain character—which means she's allowed to travel between worlds freely as a registered AnACHRONiST. As long as she doesn't do anything plot holey, of course. <<type 20ms>>FOOBAR stops scanning her. "It is a pleasure to meet you, Snow Queen Maria Penelope Regina Ivy Noelle Celestia Eleanor Sparkle Snow Heart. //Boy// that is a lot of names. Anyway, how's the children-kidnapping going? Actually, don't answer that. I don't wanna corrupt my innocence."<</type>> Her ice blue eyes twinkle at Lorem's question. My work has made me familiar with most popular characters, but what the fairytales failed to mention is just how tall and… well-endowed the Snow Queen is. But not at all surprising, I guess. "Sorry about my computer companion, Your Majesty," Jessica asks. "Can you tell us what happened here?" <<button "Continue" "wland7">><</button>>

The Snow Queen smiles like she has just swallowed a bitter pill. "Psh, just call me Maria." She flicks her piercing gaze across the sugary, icy wasteland. "I don't know what happened exactly. I was busy minding my own business… when I saw a tidal wave appeared out of nowhere. I tried freezing it before it washed over the entire kingdom, but…" She gestures her arms at the surroundings and shrugs. "Most of the kingdom's inhabitants did manage to evacuate on time, though I'm not sure where they headed." "How did they evacuate, exactly?" D asks. "Magic carpets?" "They evacuated via airship. Well, reindeer-powered airship." The smile in D's face is suddenly replaced with a look horror. "R-reindeer?" They gulp. "Santa was here?" Hayden closes his eyes for a moment at the mention of Santa and a ghost of a smirk appears on his face. "I have no idea why the old man was here in the first place, so don't ask me." D scratches the back of their neck. "Good thing we're fashionably late…" <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Wait, airship? As in, a gnomish airship?</div> FOOBAR displays a model of a rotating gnomish airship on its projector. "Airships from MetroKnome, yes. There were two of them actually, the other one had a lot of smaller, colorful balloons." Wait, she has been to Escheria before? I guess it's possible considering she's a registered AnACHRONiST. It is a beautiful place, after all. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Thank you, Maria. That confirms our suspicions then.</div> "Phyrnne?" Phyrnne floats a little closer to Queen Maria at Hayden's request. "Queen Heart… she is indeed telling the truth." <<button "Continue" "wland8">><</button>>

"Now, do you have any more questions, or are you going to… //let me go?//" <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST I suppose. You actually made it easier for the RetConners to fix this plot hole. But please don't sing that blasted song. I don't hate it, but you know we're not allowed to…</div> "Oh no, absolutely not." "May I ask where you are going?" Jessica asks. And for the first time in who knows how many years, Queen Maria's lips curve upwards. "Somewhere I needed to be a long time ago." She flips her waist-length, snow white hair, and with a snap, she summons two white horses and a carriage from thin air. ---- * <<link "\"Farewell. It was an honor to meet you, Queen Maria.\"" "wland9">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Thank you for cooperating with us. You're not as cold as the stories portrayed you to be.\"" "wland9">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Can I ask for a kiss on the forehead? I heard it'll make me numb to the cold.\"" "wland9">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> * <<link "\"It was nice meeting you, Queen Maria. The stories I've read didn't do your beauty any justice.\"" "wland9">><<set $text to 4>><</link>> * <<link "I'll give her a warm hug before she goes. I'm willing to bet it's her first one ever." "wland9">><<set $text to 6>><</link>> * <<link "Just smile." "wland9">><<set $text to 5>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>Queen Maria shoots me a nod, before she hops into the carriage, and slips away into the distance.<<elseif $text == 2>>"For what it's worth, I never wanted to be this way.<<elseif $text == 3>>"Ah, but who am I deny such a request?" She approaches me with a smirk. "You're the first one to ever ask me of this, you know that?" I close my eyes and wait for her lips to touch my forehead. "Careful, I could easily kiss you thrice." But instead of her cold lips, I only feel goosebumps around my skin—and just like that, it feels like a regular non-snowy day. I open my eyes and I can't help but smile. She actually did it. "You… don't seem the type to just kill people like that." "That's a brave assumption."<<elseif $text == 4>>"Oh, please." She waves her hand. "I'm already married outside of canon, with two children. But I appreciate the compliment." And then she winks. "You and my husband share the same taste on tall women."<<elseif $text == 5>>Queen Maria shoots me a nod, before she hops into the carriage, and slips away into the distance.<<else>>But she freezes my feet in place with a wave of her hand. "And what made you think I'll allow that?" "I just thought…" "Spare me the thought," she huffs. "Look, I appreciate the sentiment, but I have a reputation to uphold here." The ice on my feet disintegrates. It was a good try, at least. And it's nice to know that she's not as heartless as I thought.<</if>> And with that, the Snow Queen hops into the carriage, and slips away into the distance. <<if $text == 3>>"That's a thing…" D says. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Uh, $nn? I don't know if it's just me, or your eyes are changing colors...</div> "It has turned into an unnaturally icy blue, yes." Hayden says. "What? Oh, that's… that must be a side effect." ---- * <<link "Sweet. I mean, who wouldn't want eyes like the Snow Queen?" "wland10">><</link>> * <<link "I don't really care much about my eye color. I rarely see it anyway." "wland10">><</link>> * <<link "Hopefully I can change it back? I liked my eye color..." "wland10">><</link>> <<else>><<button "Continue" "wland10">><</button>><</if>>

"Aren't you lucky, $name? Just your first mission and we're already dealing with worldquakes and frozen tsunamis." "I wouldn't say lucky..." Jessica opens her mouth to catch a falling snowflake on her tongue. "But I do miss the snow a little." Hayden sighs. "Lorem, you know what to do." <<type 20ms>>"Affirmative. Requesting reinforcements from your ex-wife—I mean, the CANon Fairytale Department. Teehee." FOOBAR buzzes back towards the ship.<</type>> "D*** robot thinks it's funny." Hayden grumbles and runs on all fours back into the ship. "Ahh…" D stretches out their arms. "I think I need a quick blood pack. You heading back too, Jess?" "Yeah. I'm excited to check out the parts I bought for Lorem." "Wait," I say. "Are we just going to wait for the reinforcements?" "Not necessarily," Jessica replies. "But we solved this one quick. For now, we can do anything while we wait for the next set of anomaly reports. At this point, we might even get reassigned to a new mission." She glances at D and pushes them back. "Race you back to the ship!" D smirks and lets Jessica a headstart, but in the flap of a hummingbird's wings, D's suddenly in front of Jessica as she reaches the ramp. She forms a hammer with her bionic arm, and laughs as she playfully hammers their chest. "That is so unfair!" I shift my focus behind me when I hear the strums of a guitar. Phyrnne and Rnst have settled underneath a lollipop tree on a patch of icy ground, watching the yawning baby sun drift towards the horizon, as it casts orange-pink shadows onto the frozen landscape. I didn't expect to have free time so soon. ---- * <<link "I'll go look for Hayden in the ship. I want to get to know him more." "hayden1">><<set $freetime to "hayden">><</link>> * <<link "I hope Jessica doesn't mind if I pay her and Lorem a little visit." "jess1">><<set $freetime to "jess">><</link>> * <<link "I'm sure D would love some company." "d1">><<set $freetime to "d">><</link>> * <<link "I'll go ask Phyrnne and Rnst if there's still room for one more." "pr1">><<set $freetime to "pr">><</link>> * <<link "I'll just retreat back to my room in the Nautilus. I need some time to myself, and I still haven't put away my stuff yet." "room1">><<set $freetime to "self">><</link>>

<<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "dialogue">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> I head back to the Nautilus, and it doesn't take me long to find where Jessica is. "Oh, $nn!" Jessica fumbles around, as if she just noticed the state of her semi-disorganized workplace. "Is there something you need? Sorry if I just kinda left you there." "Oh, I don't need anything, actually," I say as I sit on a stool near her computer desk. "If I'm gonna stay on the squad, I just figured… y'know, get to know you a little better. Maybe Lorem too. I hope you don't mind?" "Not at all! It's… it's always nice to talk to someone while I'm not working. Lorem drives me nuts sometimes. Sorry about the mess…" I gesture at the various machine parts, scattered bolts, and the succulents around the room. "Is this your workshop or something?" <<type 20ms>>"This isn't a workshop," Lorem replies from the brass-tinted drone Jess is currently tinkering with. "This is a junkyard."<</type>> "See?" <<type 20ms>>"That was just for demonstrative purposes, Jess." The lights on the drone flicker slightly. "This junkyard is near and dear to me."<</type>> <<button "Continue" "jess2">><</button>>

<<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "dialogue">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> I head back to the Nautilus, and it doesn't take me long to find D's quarters. I'm not sure if I should knock, so I just call out for them. "D? Are you there?" I'm about to call out again when the sliding doors open with a satisfying hiss. "$nn? What a surprise. I mean, not really, but you get what I mean." They turn off the podcast they're listening to and beckons me inside. "Come on in!" <<linkreplace "Continue">>The sliding doors shut behind me, but what greets me inside D's lair is nothing like I would expect from a vampire. It's beyond messy. Each and every drawer and compartment seem to be stacked to the brim with trinkets, toys, art supplies, and various other collections, and yet, a quick look around suggests that this is how it's meant to be organized. "Hey, I'm over here, you know." "Sorry, I just… didn't expect your room to be like this. It's like Santa's workshop exploded in here." D chuckles. "That's what they all say. And really, I'm not even sure why some of this stuff is here." They pick up an action figure on their desk. "Like this superhero guy. I thought I gave this away already." "Wait, are you really giving most of these away? Why were you scared of meeting Santa earlier?" "Was I? No I wasn't." They cross their arms and stare at me for a few seconds… then they plops down on a bean bag chair with a sigh. "Fine. I admit it." <<button "Continue" "d2">><</button>> <</linkreplace>>

<<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "dialogue">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> I approach the two of them and listen silently as Phyrnne sings a melancholy song while Rnst strums the guitar every so often. I make sure not to get too close, just in case the lyrics are copyrighted. I clear my throat as I approach them. "You two have one more room over here?" <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST $name! Of course. We were just about done.</div> "If you don't mind me asking, what were you two singing about?" "Oh!" Phyrnne gasps, her voice much ghastlier than usual. "I…" <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Sorry. It's kind of a personal matter…</div> "No no, it is alright." She hovers in place, and dips her incorporeal hand on a hole on the ice Rnst has created. "We're paying my children a tribute." So that's why she said she knew my feeling all too well. Phyrnne moves her hands about in circles, but the water doesn't stir. "I hope the two of you are happy there in heaven, Alma and Agustin…" <<button "Continue" "pr2">><</button>>

<<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "dialogue">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> The room has plenty of drawers and compartments I can store my stuff in, so it's not a challenge at all to store all my clothes and belongings. With all my stuff finally tucked away, I plop myself onto my new, comfy bed, and… lie there for a while. So much has happened today, but between $mc's disappearance, joining the TARDIS, returning back to a devastated Escheria, and meeting the Snow Queen, I'm not sure anything has fully sunk into me yet. And then there's my new squadmates. I'm still not sure what to think of them yet, but I'm quickly warming up to them, and… I'm starting to see why they've all stuck together on this job. I turn myself around and notice something else I haven't checked out yet. My own personal bathroom… And it's got everything I could ever ask for. I still haven't taken a bath since you started reading, so I just got the perfect excuse [[to take a long shower|room2]].

The doors slide shut behind us. "Is… this your lab?" I ask as I take a look around. It's barely decorated much like my own room, except the shelves and compartments are filled with lab apparatuses. Beakers, burners, and test tubes, aligned neatly on their own racks. "Not exactly," he says as he sits down on a bean bag chair. "I synthesize most of my commonly-used transformation serums here, but this isn't where I perform experiments." I take a seat on a stool near one of his desks. "Is there a reason you invited me here? I can't imagine you just wanted to talk to me." "Very observant." He picks up a leather-bound book lying on his desk. "I picked up this bestiary while we were in Escheria, and—" "Picked up? You mean you stole it?" "What? No. I mean, I'm not above it, but I found this on the caravan." He flips randomly through the pages. "With that big of a plot hole, the RetCon teams will mostly likely reset the world anyway. I figured I might as well snag a copy." "And…? You got some questions for me?" "I saw quite a few of the fauna while I was flying around, and some of them seem… interesting enough for me to try shapeshifting into them. You know, to expand the range of my transformations. And, well, you seemed pretty enthusiastic talking about your experiences in Escheria." "I'm not exactly a zoologist, but I do have a lot of stories…" <<button "Continue" "hayden3">><</button>>

I scan through the bestiary for the most unique animals he can transform into, as he tells me about the times he needed to fight a monster transform into a similar creature. We ended up spending about half an hour sharing our experiences with mythical monsters and animals, as well as discussing our favorites. "Right. I can't imagine ever turning into a platypus again." He chuckles. "Oh, and before you ask, I wouldn't advise trying any of my serums. I'm not even sure if anyone else can handle the transformations, unless you're a shifter yourself. My idle gaze sweeps through the vials stored in his lab slash bedroom. "But if you can theoretically transform into any biological creature…" "I figured you'd ask that." He huffs. "It's not exactly a secret, but you're not a bad company so I might as well humor you. The first time I figured out I can use my serums to shift into mythological creatures, I… I got a little cocky. I was gathering some DNA samples when I came across this enchantress named Circe who threatened to turn me into a beast." Then he shoots me a look of 'I'm sure you can guess what happened next'. ---- * <<link "\"That's rough, buddy.\"" "hayden4">><</link>> * <<link "\"Do you ever regret it?\"" "hayden4">><</link>> * <<link "I just continue listening." "hayden4">><</link>>

"I was never a popular super… well, antihero anyway, so when I got cursed to be unable to turn human again, I decided I'd embrace it and expand my serum transformations by joining the TARDIS. I figured the superhero life wasn't meant for me, but I guess I still am in a way." He turns his gaze on me. "What about you? What made you join CANon in the first place?" Of course, the easy answer is that I needed something to do while I wait for my sequel. But deep down, I wanted to join because I want… * <<link "…to set a good example and be the best character I can be." "hayden5">><</link>> * <<link "…to help everyone in need, protagonist or not." "hayden5">><</link>> * <<link "…to prove that I can achieve more than I could in my story." "hayden5">><</link>> * <<link "…to find my own identity, my true purpose in this fictional world." "hayden5">><</link>> * <<link "…to discover and learn everything in all the story worlds." "hayden5">><</link>> * <<link "…to be safe, secure, and have a support network I can depend on." "hayden5">><</link>> * <<link "…to have fun and go on adventures across the story worlds." "hayden5">><</link>> * <<link "…to protect those characters who can't protect themselves." "hayden5">><</link>> * <<link "…to have a happily ever after—both for my story and others." "hayden5">><</link>>

But before I can say anything else, Lorem beeps an announcement. <<type 20ms>>"Beep-boop-beep-boop. New assignment received from HQ. Get your butts over here on the bridge, stat!"<</type>> ---- * <<link "\"Let's go.\"" "wland11">><</link>> * <<link "I give him a hug before going." "hayden6">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"So... was Lorem joking when it said you have an ex-wife?\"" "hayden6">><<set $text to 2>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>><<if $race == "dwarf" || $race == "halfling" || $race == "gnome" || $race == "goblin" || $height == 1>>It's a little awkward considering the height difference, but a hug is a hug. <</if>>He flinches a little, but surprisingly he doesn't move or push me away. "Are you done yet?" I squeeze him a little more, and then pull away. "Sorry. I just..." "Don't ever tell anyone, and maybe I'll let you do that again next time." He heads out the door. "Let's go. There's no time to waste." <<else>>"And your guess would be correct." Hayden huffs. "I see where this is going..." "What? I haven't even said anything yet." "Why else would you ask that question?" "I'm just a little curious..." He shakes his head as he leaps toward the door. "Whatever, we need to go. There's no time to waste."<</if>> <<button "Continue" "wland11">><</button>>

"So what're you doing, exactly?" "I'm trying to build a prototype steampunk drone for Lorem," she says as she switches the screwdriver in her bionic arm to a wrench. "Lorem's ICE is almost impenetrable and should keep The Nautilus safe from others trying to hack L, but the FOOBAR drones are more susceptible." <<type 20ms>>"Plus it fits a little more with the theme of the Nautilus, don't you think?"<</type>> "That too." I continue to watch her tinker with the drone and fiddle with Lorem's code, and we ended up talking about our experiences with robots and riding other ships for about half an hour. "See? There are worse robots and AI than Lorem," she says. "By the way, I'm uh… sorry again about the incident earlier." ---- * <<link "\"I actually forgot about it until you reminded me just now.\"" "jess3">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Just... can you please tell Lorem not to do it again?\"" "jess3">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Sure, but I don't think I can trust Lorem after that.\"" "jess3">><<set $text to 3>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>"Oh. Sorry." <<type 20ms>>"Really, Jess? Why're you even saying sorry for that?"<</type>> <<elseif $text == 2>><<type 20ms>>"I AM HERE, you know?"<</type>> <<else>><<type 20ms>>"Ouch."<</type>><</if>> "C'mon, L. You can be more creative with your pranks, at least. You don't have to threaten someone." <<type 20ms>>The drone's appendages tilt downwards. "Yes, Mooom."<</type>> I grab a loose spring on her desk and start spinning it with my fingers. "What got you interested in robotics anyway? Lorem said you were from the Regency era?" "Oh." She pauses and puts down the gear she's holding. <<type 20ms>>"Jess's fiance turned out to be a sexist narcissist who only cared about her family's wealth. Meanwhile, her first cousin, who was courting her, also turned out to be a massive idiot and caused a scandal with her fiance. Jess ran away like a sane human being, and that was when she accidentally bumped into famous time traveler H.G. Wells. Curious about how the machine worked, she accompanied him in several of his travels to the far future."<</type>> "Thanks for the synopsis, Lorem." Jessica takes a deep breath as she picks up the gear again. "That's… more or less what you need to know, anyway. I was… just fascinated when I first saw the early locomotives. I knew it was only a matter of time before flying machines become a reality, and… I wanted to contribute and be a part of it. "So when I met Wells, I didn't even hesitate to join him and see what the future had to offer. Sure, I didn't become a part of their development, but that only meant I could create my own inventions." I think of asking her about her arm, or how she got the ship or Lorem in the first place, but I imagine this wouldn't be the last time I'll be here in Lorem's 'junkyard'. I'll have plenty of chances to ask her later. "What about you, $nn? What made you join CANon in the first place?" Of course, the easy answer is that I needed something to do while I wait for my sequel. But deep down, I wanted to join because I want… * <<link "…to set a good example and be the best character I can be." "jess4">><</link>> * <<link "…to help everyone in need, protagonist or not." "jess4">><</link>> * <<link "…to prove that I can achieve more than I could in my story." "jess4">><</link>> * <<link "…to find my own identity, my true purpose in this fictional world." "jess4">><</link>> * <<link "…to discover and learn everything in all the story worlds." "jess4">><</link>> * <<link "…to be safe, secure, and have a support network I can depend on." "jess4">><</link>> * <<link "…to have fun and go on adventures across the story worlds." "jess4">><</link>> * <<link "…to protect those characters who can't protect themselves." "jess4">><</link>> * <<link "…to have a happily ever after—both for my story and others." "jess4">><</link>>

But before I can say anything else, Steampunk Lorem beeps an announcement. <<type 20ms>>"Hold on, you'll have to continue your backstory later." And then Lorem switches to the Nautilus speaker. "Beep-boop-beep-boop. New assignment received from HQ. Get your butts over here on the bridge, stat!"<</type>> Jessica closes her laptop. "Guess it's time to go," she says smiling. "You're free to hang out with me here anytime, by the way. Always nice to see some new perspectives." ---- * <<link "\"Let's go.\"" "wland11">><</link>> * <<link "I give Jess a hug before going." "jess5">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Am I welcome to stay in your quarters too, Jess?\"" "jess5">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Y'know, you're not as bad as I thought, Lorem. I'd love to get to know you better.\"" "jess5">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> * <<link "\"Of course I'd love to hang out here. As long as Lorem's with us too, of course.\"" "jess5">><<set $text to 4>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>><<if $race == "dwarf" || $race == "halfling" || $race == "gnome" || $race == "goblin" || $height == 1>>It's a little awkward considering the height difference, but a hug is a hug. <</if>>"$name!" she exclaims. "I..." But that's all she says as she melts into my hug. We stay in each other's arms a little longer before another beep from Lorem interrupts us. "That was nice," she says as we part. "That was really nice. I'd appreciate a little warning next time, but... I hope there's more where that came from." "Of course," I say. "Let's go?" "Let's go." <<elseif $text == 2>>"I…" She looks at the floor briefly and stomps her foot before looking back up at me with crossed arms. "$name! Was that the only reason you came to my workshop?" "Of course not! I enjoyed talking to you... And Lorem." She takes a deep breath. "Sorry, I'm just… a little surprised, that's all." Then she takes a slightly shallower one. "Let's go?" "Let's go." <<elseif $text == 3>><<type 20ms>>"Curious, I see…" Lorem says. "Hehe. As much as I'd love to talk with you more, we have more urgent things to do."<</type>> "Right," I say. "Lead the way." <<else>>"Oh, of course." <<type 20ms>>"Can't resist me, huh?" Lorem says. "Maybe we'll get along after all. But for now, we have more urgent things to do."<</type> "Right," I say. "Lead the way."<</if>> <<button "Continue" "wland11">><</button>>

With nowhere else to really sit on, I take a seat on the foot of their bed. "But why?" They scratch their head with a grin. "You really wanna know my darkest secret?" "Come on, you can't leave me hanging now." They pick up a stress ball on the ground, throws it into a bookcase, and catches it again as it bounces off. "I tried to feed on Santa once." What. I'm not even sure whether to laugh or… "I promise I didn't mean to do it! It's… it's complicated, okay?" D stops bouncing the ball as their grin disappears. "You remember when Hayden said I killed innocent people? Yeah. I… it was the time I discovered that my teenage author abandoned their fanfiction story." They stare off into the snowy landscape outside the windows. "I went on a feeding frenzy. Bit everyone, sucked anyone dry I came across. Until some TARDIS agents captured me. At the time I didn't know if it was worse knowing that my author abandoned my story, or… learning the fact that I'm just a fictional character in the first place." ---- * <<link "Surely it's learning that you're just a character." "d3">><</link>> * <<link "I don't know what to think either..." "d3">><</link>> * <<link "Surely it's learning that your author abandoned you." "d3">><</link>>

"But don't worry. Most of them were resurrected anyway." "Mostly?" "Well, some of them I was supposed to kill. My character was supposed to be evil, I think. That's why I'm trying to promote ethical feeding habits for other vampires. And… you know, making the little kids at the Children Protagonists Orphanage happy and letting them know that vampires aren't all bad." D finally smiles again. "Come on. Surely you have stories to share about your little ones?" <<linkreplace "\"Don't get me started.\"">>"Don't get me started." And so, I spend the next half hour telling D my funniest and most memorable experiences with $boynn and $girlnn, while they share some of theirs too in the orphanage. "Don't worry. I know we'll find them after this mission," D says. "But I've been wondering. If that's the reason you joined the TARDIS, what made you join CANon in the first place?" Of course, the easy answer is that I needed something to do while I wait for my sequel. But deep down, I wanted to join because I want… * <<link "…to set a good example and be the best character I can be." "d4">><</link>> * <<link "…to help everyone in need, protagonist or not." "d4">><</link>> * <<link "…to prove that I can achieve more than I could in my story." "d4">><</link>> * <<link "…to find my own identity, my true purpose in this fictional world." "d4">><</link>> * <<link "…to discover and learn everything in all the story worlds." "d4">><</link>> * <<link "…to be safe, secure, and have a support network I can depend on." "d4">><</link>> * <<link "…to have fun and go on adventures across the story worlds." "d4">><</link>> * <<link "…to protect those characters who can't protect themselves." "d4">><</link>> * <<link "…to have a happily ever after—both for my story and others." "d4">><</link>> <</linkreplace>>

But before I can say anything else, Lorem beeps an announcement. <<type 20ms>>"Beep-boop-beep-boop. New assignment received from HQ. Get your butts over here on the bridge, stat!"<</type>> ---- * <<link "\"Let's go.\"" "d5">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "I give D a hug before going." "d5">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> <<if $race == "vampire">> * <<link "\"Are you free later when we finish the mission?\"" "d5">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> <<else>> * <<link "\"Maybe you can show me what your ethical feeding habits are like later?\"" "d5">><<set $text to 4>><</link>> <</if>>

<<if $text == 2>><<if $race == "dwarf" || $race == "halfling" || $race == "gnome" || $race == "goblin" || $height == 1>>It's a little awkward considering the height difference, but a hug is a hug. <</if>>"Woah, hey!" they say as they wrap their big arms back around me. "Ah... we got another hugger on the squad. About time." We stay in each other's arms a little longer before another beep from Lorem interrupts us. "Boo," they say as we finally part. "I guess we'll have to continue the cuddle session later." <<else>>D shoots me a thumbs up and the biggest grin I've ever seen from them. Well, I can't wait to finish the mission then.<</if>> <<button "Continue" "wland11">><</button>>

I let the refreshingly <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[hot water]">> <<option "[cold water]">> <</cycle>> blast and wash away the exhaustion from my $body body. I let it run for a minute, a couple, a few… and before I know it, I've been here for a good fifteen minutes. I step off the shower, and turn it off. And then, my thoughts return to me as I grab my towel. Is this my new life now? Or do I want to get back into my old job? But does it even matter? I know I joined CANon because I needed something to do while I wait for my sequel… But deep down, I wanted to join because I want… * <<link "…to set a good example and be the best character I can be." "room3">><</link>> * <<link "…to help everyone in need, protagonist or not." "room3">><</link>> * <<link "…to prove that I can achieve more than I could in my story." "room3">><</link>> * <<link "…to find my own identity, my true purpose in this fictional world." "room3">><</link>> * <<link "…to discover and learn everything in all the story worlds." "room3">><</link>> * <<link "…to be safe, secure, and have a support network I can depend on." "room3">><</link>> * <<link "…to have fun and go on adventures across the story worlds." "room3">><</link>> * <<link "…to protect those characters who can't protect themselves." "room3">><</link>> * <<link "…to have a happily ever after—both for my story and others." "room3">><</link>>

And you know what? I don't think there's a wrong answer. Just as I finish drying off, Lorem beeps an announcement. <<type 20ms>>"Beep-boop-beep-boop. New assignment received from HQ. Get your butts over here on the bridge, stat!"<</type>> I stretch out my arms, <<if $clothes == "suit">>and get back to my suit.<<else>>and don a <<if $nighties == "nightgown">>fresh, new nightgown<<else>>fresh new set of PJs<</if>>.<</if>> <<if $glasses == true && $hearingaids == true>>Oh, and don't forget my eyeglasses and hearing aids, of course. my hearing aids, of course.<<elseif $glasses == true>>Oh, and don't forget my eyeglasses, of course.<<elseif $hearingaids == true>>Oh, and don't forget my hearing aids, of course.<</if>> [[Let's do this.|wland11]]

<<cacheaudio "weasel" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/ll6zmjz64wixylk/popgoestheweasel_km.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "dark">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> Evening has fallen in WanderLand when <<if $freetime == "pr">>the three of us return to<<else>>Rnst and Phyrnne arrive back in<</if>> the ship. Once we're all settled around the bridge as usual, Lorem starts projecting several different holographic globes again, but the displays and lights flicker for a second. <<type 20ms>>Lorem's projectors turn red. "What the h***, Phyrnne? I didn't even do anything this time!"<</type>> The lights flicker once more, returning Lorem's lights to their usual blue. "That… that was not me," Phyrnne whispers. Then there's a rattling sound—and then the ship starts to wobble. "Lorem, fly up," Jessica says. "I think the ice is breaking—" [[''KA-THUNK!''|wland12]]

"I'm sorry for your loss," I say as I take a seat beside Rnst. Phyrnne finally takes her hands off the water. "Like I said, it is alright. If I am to be an effective therapist, I have to leave my own baggage as well. I am sure you are wondering why I use a different name?" I nod. "Some people call me //La Llorona//, but you probably already know why I dislike the moniker. And before you ask, no, I did not drown my children. They were victims of an undeveloped murder mystery that did not have a killer." I take a deep breath. ---- * <<link "I weep quietly. Stories really are unfair sometimes." "pr3">><</link>> * <<link "I just stay silent. I wonder what she's feeling about my feelings right now." "pr3">><</link>> * <<link ""I… I understand now. That's a really difficult position to be in."" "pr3">><</link>>

<div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST And to think I even thought that my backstory was the worst…</div> I give her a curious look. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST That's the best part. I have none! I was cut off from an ensemble cast because there were too many characters already. I almost wish I didn't even exist back then... (sighs) ...only to realize that I had it good. There's a lot of worse backstories out there…</div> "It did have a good part," Phyrnne mumbles. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Hm?</div> Phyrnne smiles. "The part where you freed my soul." <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Yeah, accidentally. (strums guitar twice) Come on, let's lighten up the mood a little. You got a favorite song, $nn?</div> <<button "Continue" "pr4">><</button>>

And so we spend the next half hour or so belting out to each of our favorite songs. I didn't know about half of them, but it was still fun to sing along with the two of them. Singing with a ghost just hits different. "$name?" "Yes, Phyrnne?" "Thank you for the company." "It's nothing," I say. "I had fun too. And thanks again for sharing your backstories with me." Rnst stands up as she watches the last rays of the sleepy sun fades from the frozen horizon. "Goodnight, Baby Sun." She picks up her guitar. "Speaking of, you haven't shared yours with us yet." "I've already told my children our story a lot of times already." I scratch my head. "It's… a little boring. It doesn't feel right to share it when I probably have the best backstory here out of everyone." "We would still love to hear it, regardless. A happy story, is a happy story." <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Maybe another time then. But if it was a good backstory… what made you join CANon in the first place?</div> Of course, the easy answer is that I needed something to do while I wait for my sequel. But deep down, I wanted to join because I want… * <<link "…to set a good example and be the best character I can be." "pr5">><</link>> * <<link "…to help everyone in need, protagonist or not." "pr5">><</link>> * <<link "…to prove that I can achieve more than I could in my story." "pr5">><</link>> * <<link "…to find my own identity, my true purpose in this fictional world." "pr5">><</link>> * <<link "…to discover and learn everything in all the story worlds." "pr5">><</link>> * <<link "…to be safe, secure, and have a support network I can depend on." "pr5">><</link>> * <<link "…to have fun and go on adventures across the story worlds." "pr5">><</link>> * <<link "…to protect those characters who can't protect themselves." "pr5">><</link>> * <<link "…to have a happily ever after—both for my story and others." "pr5">><</link>>

But before I can say anything else, the fairy FOOBAR drone flutters towards for an announcement. <<type 20ms>>"Beep-boop-beep-boop. New assignment received from HQ. Get your butts over here on the bridge, stat!"<</type>> ---- * <<link "\"Let's go.\"" "wland11">><</link>> * <<link "I give Rnst a hug before going. Maybe Phyrnne too, but I'm not sure how that'd work." "pr6">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Are you free later when we finish the mission, Rnst?\"" "pr6">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Are you free later when we finish the mission, Phyrnne?\"" "pr6">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> * <<link "\"Let's do this again sometime. Just the three of us.\"" "pr6">><<set $text to 4>><</link>>

<<$text == 1>><<if $race == "dwarf" || $race == "halfling" || $race == "gnome" || $race == "goblin" || $height == 1>>It's nice getting to hug someone closer to my height for once. <</if>><div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Oh, um...</div> Rnst mumbles as she tries to find the words, but she wraps her arms around me after a while. I glance at Phyrnne. "Join us?" She falters for a moment. It seems like she's a little tongue-tied as well. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Get in here, Phyrnne.</div> And she does. It's... more of an icy breeze passing by than a hug, but it's the thought that counts. We stay around each other a little longer before another beep from Lorem interrupts us. I smile at them as we all part. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST (smiling) That was nice.</div> "Indeed," Phyrnne whispers. "I have... never been a part of a group hug before." My grin grows wider. "Well... we could make it a tradition." <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST The only problem is Hayden.</div> "Then I would not mind it being only between us," Phyrnne says, smiling a little. <<elseif $text == 2>><div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Well, when we've finished the mission. I don't see why not.</div> "That's great! I'm looking forward to it then." <<elseif $text == 3>>"Oh." Phyrnne contemplates for a second. It's still a little weird to know that she can tell what my intention is with my question. But she smiles. "I am free if you are free." "That's great! I'm looking forward to it then." <<else>><div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Oh, absolutely.</div> "Anytime," Phyrnne says with a gentle smile. "That's great! I'm looking forward to it then."<</if>> <<button "Continue" "wland11">><</button>>

A mermaid, its eyes red, scales a sickly green, and mouth foaming slams into the ship's windows, trying to slobber through the glass. "What the—?" Something else pulls the mermaid down, as a tiny gingerbread man and three bears—two large and a small one wearing a diaper—try to smash and clamber through the windows. And they too, have the same dark, green rotting flesh, red eyes, and foaming mouths that could only mean one thing… zombies. By the time a horde of brain-starved leprechauns try to join the fun, Lorem manages to lift the ship off into the atmosphere, activate the ship's force field, and bouncing the zombified denizens of WanderLand off the windows. "Zombies?!" D exclaims. "What the h*** man? Those stupid things are h**** disgusting to fight." "Those are the ones who perished in the tsunami," Phyrnne whispers. "We got to hurry." <<type 20ms>>Lorem displays the globes once again. "Ehem, before I was interrupted, based on the details you—we have gathered, HQ has detected four possible worlds the anomalies we're tracking could be in. Reports are fresh, so if you all hurry and decide, maybe we can finally catch those stupid anomalies!" The globes start spinning around like a wheel. "In fact, I'll even select one at random right now!"<</type>> "Lorem Ipsum!" shouts Jessica. The globes slow down to a stop. <<type 20ms>>"Teehee! No, really—pick one before I actually do it."<</type>> ---- * <<link "Shipwreck survival story stuck in groundhog day" "wland13">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "Animated musical adventure suddenly turning into a silent film" "wland13">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "World War II casualties return as zombies" "wland13">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> * <<link "Post-apocalyptic sci-fi colony on an aquatic planet" "wland13">><<set $text to 4>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>><div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST It can't be the shipwreck survival. The anomalies left aboard an airship, but that's the premise of the story, not the plot hole.</div> I scratch my head. "Oh, right…" "Well, what about the aquatic planet?" Jessica asks. "I've got a strong hunch they're there." <<elseif $text == 2>>"It is possible that the anomalies would go to a musical considering their behavior, but the plot hole itself doesn't match with the natural disasters we have seen," Phyrnne says. "But if my theory is correct that they are not AnACHRONiSTS, it is unlikely that they would go to this specific world intentionally." "Well, what about the aquatic planet?" Jessica asks. "I've got a strong hunch they're there." <<elseif $text == 3>>RNST It's possible. We did see zombies just now... but I don't see any other connections besides that. "Well, what about the aquatic planet?" Jessica asks. "I've got a strong hunch they're there." <<else>>"I've got a strong hunch they're in the aquatic planet too." Jessica says.<</if>> "I'm not sure…" D twirls their short ponytail. "Post-apocalyptic sci-fi colony on an aquatic planet. There's nothing… wrong with it exactly?" "Lorem?" "No other details are included in the report, sir. There's just reports of anomalies in the story world." <<if $text == 2>>"The plot holes may still be too small to detect from this range." Phyrnne says.<<else>>"The plot holes may still be too small to detect from this range." Phyrnne says. "The musical adventure seems most likely, but if my theory is correct that they are not AnACHRONiSTS, then it is unlikely that they would go to that specific world intentionally."<</if>> <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST The aquatic planet would also make a seamless connection with the tsunami, just like how Gub'bat Forest connected with the forest here in WanderLand.</div> "Then we're all set," Hayden announces. "Lorem, prime the warp engine." "Right ahead of ya." <<if $text != 4>>"Don't worry." Jessica approaches me. "You'll get the hang of it soon. It's not like we agree or get it right every time anyway."<</if>> <<button "Continue" "wland14">><</button>>

<<type 20ms>>"Finally," Lorem starts narrating. "And so, Squad 626 continued their not-so-harrowing journey to the post-apocalyptic world where they suspect the anomalies are. And as the undead rise and sunset falls on the frozen and fractured fairytale world, the ragtag team, along with their new, surprisingly competent recruit, followed the anomalies' trail into the deep unknown." ''Destination:'' ''Story World Genre:'' Post-Apocalyptic Sci-Fi ''Planetary Axial tilt:'' 93.4° ''Anomaly Threat Level:'' Probably Keter ''Bibliographical Coordinates:'' ''X:'' 12345.678 ''Y:'' 98534.6 ''Z:'' 13990.23 "They could only hope they made the right choice."<</type>> "Cut the theatrics, Lorem." Hayden says. "Everyone, hold on to something and prepare for hyperwarp." <<button "Continue" "wland15">><</button>>

The front pointy ends of the Nautilus slowly split apart like a scissor… and a hole slowly unravels as the Nautilus cuts through the night sky. I could only stare at the cosmic portal growing and crackling before my eyes. A real, actual plot hole. <<type 100ms>>"Five, four, three, two, one and a half…"<</type>> I hold onto the railings beside me tight, as I feel time and space compress around me. <<timed 10s t8n>><<type 100ms>><<link "\"One… Here we… GOOO—!!!\"" "battle1">><</link>><</type>><</timed>>

<<set $chapter to "Book 2, Chapter 4">> !$title !!Book 2, Chapter 4 <<timed 2s t8n>> Everything is blindingly white… <<timed 2s t8n>>until it's blindingly dark.<</timed>> <<timed 4s t8n>>The ship's lights flicker back to life <<timed 2s t8n>>one by one,<</timed>> <<timed 4s t8n>>but the surroundings stay dark. <<linkreplace "Continue">> <<if $race == "werewolf">>I suddenly feel power surging through me, like it's… not even a full moon. Like there's four full moons.<</if>><div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Are we in the planet? Why is there no light outside at all?</div> There's a long, loud whistle outside, and a globe of light passes by the windows, briefly illuminating sharp, angled teeth. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Oh. We're underwater… (gasps) Phyrnne? Are you okay?</div> "I'm okay, I'm okay," Phyrnne whispers to herself. "This is an alien planet, this is an alien planet... They did not drown here..." "Lorem, sitrep." Our avatars appear on the projectors again, as the globe is replaced by the Nautilus. ---- * <<link "Peer through the windows. I mean, look at those glow-in-the dark jellyfish and other alien sea creatures!" "battle2">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "I'm not sure what to do in this situation, so I'll just listen and observe what the squad does." "battle2">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> <</linkreplace>> <</timed>> <</timed>> <</timed>>

<<type 20ms>>"Alright, so the party has spotted twelve anomalies on the ADaR, above the water. It looks like they're riding on a boat. What is the party's next move?"<</type>> <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Twelve? Where did the other five come from?</div> <<type 20ms>>"Look Rnst, if I knew, I would've told you all already."<</type>> "Must be from WanderLand," Hayden muses. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Let's keep monitoring them. Approach the boat slowly to try to get within grappling range.</div> <<type 20ms>>"Acknowledged. Anything else?"<</type>> Jessica perks up. "Check for ICE systems?" <<type 20ms>>"Coward's move, but mm'kay… Hmm, what? Oh, that makes sense. D*** anomalies are running on steampunk tech! We can't hack that! Are we sure these anomalies are worth the bounty? I'll have to lower the XP reward for this one, boys. Sorry."<</type>> "Lorem?" <<type 20ms>>"Awaiting request, user Phyrnne."<</type>> "Can you give my avatar a blue flower on her ear?" <<type 20ms>>"Request granted."<</type>> "Thank you." "Alright, that's enough RP." Hayden claps his paws. <<if $text == 1>>"And stop ogling the fish like we're in a g****** waterpark, $name. You don't want to know what happened the last time we lost focus."<<else>>"I don't need to remind everyone what happened last time we lost focus."<</if>> D sighs. "Yeah, yeah. I'm putting my game face—I mean, game fangs on." <<button "Continue" "battle3">><</button>>

<<if $flight == true>><<set _flavor to "Plus I can already fly anyway.">><<else>><<set _flavor to "">><</if>>"It's a while before we reach the surface," Jessica says. "We might get into a scuffle. Want to wear something… a little more suitable for the occasion, $nn?" "What do you mean? <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[A scuba suit?]">> <<option "[A swimsuit?]">> <</cycle>>" "My power armor, silly. It's a little heavy, but it's got a jetpack so you can fly around. I've got a spare one in my workshop if you want to try it." "Oh. Does it cost me diamonds?" "Um, what? I dunno what you're talking about. I'm letting you borrow it. Don't worry, it's very much adjustable to your size." ---- * <<link "Of course I'll borrow it. I'm not gonna pass up the chance to wear power armor." "battle4">><<set $clothes to "armor">><<set $flight to true>><<set $text to 1>><</link>> <<if $clothes == "suit">> * <<link "I think I'll stay with the suit. I think the cloak would be more useful. _flavor" "battle4">><<set $clothes to "suit">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> <<else>> * <<link "I think I'll change into my suit instead. I think the cloak would be more useful." "battle4">><<set $clothes to "suit">><<set $text to 3>><</link>><</if>> * <<link "The power armor is cool, but nothing says I'm awesome more than fighting in my $nighties." "battle4">><<set $clothes to "nighties">><<set $text to 4>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>I follow Jessica towards her workshop, and after a few pointers, she leaves me alone so she can put hers on. A couple minutes later, we return to the bridge with clad in power armor. It's a little heavier than I expected, but I should get used to it soon. <<elseif $text == 2>>Jessica leaves, and a few minutes later, she returns from her workshop, clad in power armor. <<elseif $text == 3>>I go back to my quarters and quickly change to my TARDIS suit. I give myself a quick once-over to make sure everything's in place, and return to the bridge as Jessica returns from her workshop, clad in power armor. <<else>>I go back to my quarters and quickly change to my $nighties. I give myself a quick once-over to make sure I didn't forget anything, and return to the bridge as Jessica returns from her workshop, clad in power armor.<</if>> "D***." D shoots finger guns at Jessica. "Looking good, Jess." ---- * <<link "\"What D said. It really suits you.\"" "battle5">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "I just give her a smile." "battle5">><<set $text to 2>><</link>>

Jessica rolls her eyes. "Don't even try flattering me, <<if $text == 1>>you two<<else>>D<</if>>." <<if $clothes == "armor">>"Wait, how do I even use the jetpack?" "Just press this button." She points to a button on the side. "And if you've played any videogame, then you already know how to control it." Very useful, Jess. Very useful.<</if>> <<type 20ms>>"We're just beneath the surface," Lorem announces, as the projectors switch to a live feed of the alien planet above.<</type>> Post-apocalyptic sci-fi is right. The sky is in twilight, and the stars and the alien moons are bright enough to illuminate the darkening sea waters. And scattered all across the sea are the remnants of a space colony that once lived here—generational spaceships and space stations torn into pieces litter the area, like icebergs sticking out of the water. This is a spaceship graveyard. ---- * <<link "Cool..." "battle6">><</link>> * <<link "Wow, that's a lot of destruction. I wonder what caused all this if this wasn't the anomalies' fault." "battle6">><</link>> * <<link "Look at all those poor spaceships..." "battle6">><</link>> * <<link "Let's hope the Nautilus won't belong here..." "battle6">><</link>>

<<type 20ms>>"Alert: Random whirlpools are forming all over the ocean."<</type>> "The anomalies are starting to cause disturbances," Phyrnne says. "We need to act now." The live feed then focuses into a vessel zooming acroos the water. But it's no airship. "What the h***?" D says. "Is that a schoolbus on top of a spaceship sailboat?" <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST (pointing at the screen) It seems like they're headed towards the space station ruins. Let's not wait around before that happens. Are we in grappling hook range, Lorem?</div> <<type 20ms>>"Affirmative, user Rnst. Awaiting next command."<</type>> <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST It seems like they're getting sucked into one of the whirlpools. Fire it now!"</div> "Do it, Lorem," commands Jessica. <<type 20ms>>The Nautilus surfaces, locks on to the spiraling spaceship-boat, and Lorem lets loose a large grappling hook from the ship. "Eat my hook!"<</type>><<button "Continue" "battle7">><</button>>

<<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><</timed>><</if>> But instead of connecting to the boat, it gets knocked away by a huge wave… and snags a tentacle instead as a great multi-headed monster emerges from the depths. The background music gets cut off as we're <<linkreplace "all suddenly sent sideways—">>all suddenly sent sideways— <div style="text-align: right; margin-left: 80px">—as the leviathan tries to free its tentacle from the hook. "Cutting the line, I'm cutting the line!" Lorem shouts as it breaks our connection from the hook, and the ship slowly rocks back and forth into a standstill. But to our surprise, the anomalies are faring better than we expected. The schoolbus, yes, the schoolbus—is now flying using a rocket booster attached to its back, as it tries to evade the monster's myriad of tentacles. <<linkreplace "Everyone turns to Rnst.">>Everyone turns to Rnst. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST What? I know I can summon eldritch beings but it definitely wasn't—</div> "I don't think that's a Lovecraftian creature," I say. "Considering the whirlpools, I'd say that's Scylla." <<button "Continue" "battle8">><</button>> <</linkreplace>><</linkreplace>>

Hayden spits. "Oh, I've heard of her. Maybe we can use still use it to our advantage. See if you can control the beast, Rnst." <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST "I don't think I could even control something—"</div> "Rnst. Stop doubting when you haven't even tried it yet." <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Right, I… I'll try my best.</div> Hayden smirks as he pulls out a vial from his lab coat. "As for me, I have my own beast to deal with..." D grins. "In a good mood today, huh, Heidi?" "Oh, I've been itching for a real fight for a while now." He stretches his arms. "Lorem," Jessica says, her voice full of conviction. "Black ICE protocol activated." <<type 20ms>>All the FOOBAR drones in the bridge light up in an angry red. "Finally."<</type>> "And Lorem? Play battle music." <<type 20ms>>"With pleasure, Lady Jessica Rose Armstrong."<</type>> "Ooh, I like the sound of that." <<button "Continue" "battle9">><</button>>

<<cacheaudio "darkling" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/6r17q986pkzlilr/darkling_km.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set $music to "weasel">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</if>> "Wait, what's our plan here, exactly?" "Our plan?" Hayden's eyes twinkle with barely repressed excitement. "F****** Scylla ruined our plan. So now we ruin hers." <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST The hyperwarp has drained our narrativium reserves, so we can't fly the ship until it recharges. The anomalies are busy with the monster, so thankfully we still have the element of surprise.</div> D puts an arm around Rnst's shoulders. "What this nerd means is that it's time to fight." <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST (pushes D away) That works too.</div> "Ready, $nn?" D asks. ---- * <<link "\"No, but let's do it anyway.\"" "battle10">><</link>> * <<link "\"Oh, I'm born ready.\"" "battle10">><</link>> * <<link "\"Let's make this one quick.\"" "battle10">><</link>> * <<link "\"GLHF, everyone.\"" "battle10">><</link>> * <<link "\Let's go fix some plot holes.\"" "battle10">><</link>> * <<link "\"Squad 626, roll out!\"" "battle10">><</link>> * <<link "\"Squad 626, assemble!\"" "battle10">><</link>> * <<link "I just nod. Battlecries are lame." "battle10">><</link>>

We all grab our weapons and head towards the ship's cargo bay. This time, instead of the entry ramp lowering down, the roof above us slides open, filling our nostrils with salty sea air, as the stars and the alien moons above shine their light upon us. This is it. <<linkreplace "This is the climax of my first mission.">>This is the climax of my first mission. Lorem tries to maneuver the ship into a better position and avoid the whirlpools, but the fight just got more interesting. The flying school bus is now firing at Scylla with a gatling gun mounted on top, firing <<cycle "$projectiles">> <<option "[giant eggs]" "eggs">> <<option "[giant acorns]" "acorns">> <<option "[giant peanuts]" "peanuts">> <<option "[giant popcorn]" "popcorn">> <</cycle>>. And if that wasn't enough, a green dragon with a comically long neck and wearing a <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[pink dress]">> <<option "[blue dress]">> <</cycle>> pops out from the flying schoolbus and starts attacking the sea monster. They're anomalies, alright. "Are you getting this on video, Lorem?" D asks. "D***. I don't know whether to be amused or terrified that the anomalies can summon dragons wearing dresses." Wait… "I don't think they summoned it," I say. "That's a jabberwock. They must've captured it from WanderLand." "Lorem." Hayden uncorks the vial he's holding. "Take down the force field." <<type 20ms>>The faint blue sphere surrounding the ship flickers and vanishes. "As you wish."<</type>> "I'll go handle Scylla. You guys get the dragon and the school bus." And with that, Hayden gulps the contents of the <<cycle "$vial">> <<option "[green vial]" "green">> <<option "[blue vial]" "blue">> <</cycle>>, and dives wordlessly into the depths below. ---- * <<link "\"Give 'em h***, Hayden.\"" "battle11">><</link>> * <<link "\"Is he gonna need a new pair of pants after that?\"" "battle11">><</link>> * <<link "\"Uh, is he okay...?\"" "battle11">><</link>> * <<link "I just wait silently." "battle11">><</link>> <</linkreplace>>

<<cacheaudio "clash" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/1re4wq36e20mcuy/clashdefiant_km.mp3?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "darkling">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> A bright $vial light emanates from beneath… <<timed 2s t8n>>…<</timed>> <<timed 4s t8n>>And then… Hayden—or more accurately, Kaiju Hayden—emerges between us and Scylla with a thunderous roar. <<linkreplace "Continue">>Everyone on the ship cheers for our Godzillan friend as Lorem brings back the force field to shield us from the incoming water splash, and probably some of Hayden's acidic saliva. But the anomalies still have more tricks up their sleeves. <<cycle "$animals">> <<option "[Two giant flying bears]" "bears">> <<option "[Two giant flying dogs]" "dogs">> <<option "[Two giant flying cats]" "cats">> <<option "[Two giant flying pigs]" "pigs">> <<option "[Two giant flying rabbits]" "rabbits">> <<option "[Two giant flying turtles]" "turtles">> <<option "[Two giant flying penguins]" "penguins">> <<option "[Two giant flying elephants]" "elephants">> <<option "[Two giant flying seals]" "seals">> <<option "[Two giant flying dinosaurs]" "dinosaurs">> <</cycle>> pop out from the school bus to help the jabberwock as they start <<cycle "$elemental">> <<option "[breathing fire]" "fire">> <<option "[breathing lightning]" "lightning">> <</cycle>> towards Kaiju Hayden. "Bruuuughhh!" It looks like not even the Babel Worm has a translation for that one. <<button "Continue" "battle12">><</button>> <</linkreplace>> <</timed>>

It's an impressive 3 on 1 giant battle, and for a moment, Kaiju Hayden seems to be winning. He bellows once more as he prepares an overhead attack, but as he opens his mouth, his roar dissipates to a tiny squeak as he shrinks… <<timed 6s t8n>>…down—<</timed>> <<timed 8s t8n>>—and down…<</timed>> <<timed 10s t8n>>…until we can no longer see him.<</timed>> <<timed 12s t8n>> ---- * <<link "\"Nooo! Haydeeen!!!\"" "battle13">><</link>> * <<link "\"Holy moly. He's... gone.\"" "battle13">><</link>> * <<link "\"We're screwed. We're freaking screwed.\"" "battle13">><</link>> * <<link "\"How're we even going to defeat them?\"" "battle13">><</link>> * <<link "\"We have a back up plan, right guys?\"" "battle13">><</link>> * <<link "\"He kinda deserved it, I think.\"" "battle13">><</link>> * <<link "I'm speechless." "battle13">><</link>> <</timed>>

"Bah, who needs him?" D starts floating into the air. "You guys handle these flying monsters, I'll try not to let the bus escape. I think I can handle a few giant $projectiles to the face." And then he zooms off into the distance. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST (closes eyes and takes a deep breath) Maybe Hayden's right. I can do this.</div> Rnst starts tracing circles and other geometric shapes on the floor with a chalk, places down some ominous-looking candles, and lights them up. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Phyrnne, Jessica, $name. I'll be defenseless while I try to communicate with Scylla. Try to protect my body, okay?</div> We all nod with approval, and she starts chanting in a language I never heard before. Fortunately, or perhaps unfortunately, I can understand it thanks to the Babel worm. <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST O great being. This fearful one seeks to understand the depths of your suffering O great Scylla. Let me alleviate your thirst and @#!$@% &#%^@!!! The creature's ravenous heads thirst. The teeth. The eyes. The nostrils. They all thirst for blood. The long forgotten dreams of the innocent ones. For so long has the fearful maiden's rage been suppressed, hidden deep betwixt the murky waters. And once more the writhing and crying and cackling heads thirst for the innocent's blood.</div> And just like that, Rnst's eyes glow <<cycle "$glow">> <<option "[a deep red]" 1>> <<option "[a deep purple]" 2>> <<option "[a deep green]" 3>> <</cycle>>, and the large multi-headed monster starts struggling over Rnst's control. <<button "Continue" "battle14">><</button>>

<<if $glow != 1>><div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST What the? $name, stop messing with it!</div> "Sorry!"<</if>> Meanwhile, the flying $animals are trying to break through the Nautilus's protective barrier, producing honey-comb shaped ripples on the force field with their $elemental breath. Well, this isn't my first rodeo. I'm not about to turn this into a curbstomp battle. <<if $ranged == true>>I take a deep breath, aim my $weapon at the monstrous anomalies, and start unloading at… <<elseif $magic == true>>Let's see how they fare against my $weapon. I take a deep breath to clear my mind of any distractions, and start casting <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[a fireball]">> <<option "[a lightning bolt]">> <<option "[an ice comet]">> <<option "[arcane missiles]">> <</cycle>>. Once I'm ready, I unload my magical spell… <<else>>I've got my $weapon, but I don't really have any ranged weapons of my own, except CANon's standard-issue laser blasters. I load them up, take a deep breath, and aim for…<</if>> * <<link "...their heads." "battle15">><</link>> * <<link "...their bodies." "battle15">><</link>> * <<link "...their wings." "battle15">><</link>>

Almost all of my attacks are a direct hit, but it doesn't seem to bother them. I unleash another round of attacks at the $animals, but if they were even hurt at all, they're not showing any signs of it. Just what the h*** are these things? "I can hear them, but I do not feel or see any emotional signatures from these creatures unlike the dragon," Phyrnne says. "Perhaps they are merely illusions?" "Then we just have to target the source," Jessica says. She shifts her bionic arm into rocket launcher mode, and loads it up with an explosive from her power armor. A golden ring of light surrounds her wrist as a bunch of runes scroll through. She taps and activates a light blue and a purple rune, and aims it on the bus. "//Sayonara,// m************!" She fires three missiles from her arm, leaving a trail of snowflakes. Even with the bus's erratic flight pattern and the random Scylla heads blocking the way, the missiles curve and home in perfectly. But the anomalies don't play fair—a tornado appears out of nowhere, and sends the missiles right back at us. "Oh no you don't!" Jessica scrambles to find the right rune, but thankfully she's able to activate a brown rune on her wrist just in time, absorbing the cryo-explosion from the missiles. Thankfully, the Babel worm seem to have a dampening effect too—it's not as loud or ear-ringing as I expected it to be. "Right, they can control natural disasters. Should've expected that. Thank god I got that earth rune figured out. I'm not sure how long the force field can last with our narrativium reserves." <<button "Continue" "battle16">><</button>>

We don't have time to admire the resulting snowfall however, as the $animals' continous attacks are depleting the barrier. <<type 20ms>>That's when Lorem finally decides to be helpful and sends out a dozen of FOOBAR drones. "Hey, I'm a part of the party too." The drones surround the $animals and start firing tiny light beams at them.<</type>> The $animals poof into giant, mouthless blob monsters, but Lorem's cheer gets interrupted when the blobs poof back into their animal forms. Lorem tries several more times, but they keep poofing back. <<type 20ms>>"What the actual f***? That is SO unfair! The illusions should be broken by now!!12!!1!" Lorem continues raging and starts charging The Nautilus's laser cannons.<</type>> Jessica sighs. "I don't think that's a good idea, Lorem…" <<type 20ms>>"Shut up, lady!" Lorem fires, and a giant blue laser beam starts sweeping through the sky—and into the school bus, still trying to fight off D and Scylla.<</type>> But it's never that easy. The anomalies have expected the attack and counters by summoning a giant pink flower-shaped shield to redirect the beam, hitting <<cycle "$target">> <<option "[D, who's currently in an arm-tentacle wrestling with Scylla]" 1>> <<option "[me, Jessica, and Rnst]" 2>> <<option "[the $animals]" 3>> <</cycle>>. I shouldn't really be messing with the text, but maybe I can redirect it? <<button "Continue" "battle17">><</button>>

<<if $target == 1>>"What the f***, Lorem?" D shouts as their half-burnt face slowly regenerates. "I was winning that!"<<elseif $target == 2>>The laser narrowly avoids D, but it hits the ship's force fields instead until Lorem finally turns it off.<<else>>The laser narrowly avoids the $animals as they scurry away, but it hits the ship's force fields instead until Lorem finally turns it off.<</if>> But the anomalies aren't done yet. The shield starts spinning rapidly as a tornado envelopes it—shooting it off like a projectile. It hits D straight on, the shield ricocheting off them, and pinballing towards <<cycle "$shieldtarget">> <<option "[the FOOBAR drones]" 1>> <<option "[Scylla's heads and tentacles]" 2>> <</cycle>>. <<button "Continue" "battle17.5">><</button>>

<<type 20ms>>"What the—?" Lorem's voice returns after a few seconds. "I swear if it's Phyrrne again… Wait—oh no. I can feel it, Jess. I can feel my wires and tubes popping. They're in the tubes, Jessica! THEY'RE IN MY TUBES!"<</type>> The lone surviving FOOBAR drone displays a screen of all the systems losing connection as red lights start flashing all over the Nautilus. "You guys still haven't defeated the anomalies?" We hear a tiny, squeaky voice in our comms. "I'm disappointed." I feel something land on my shoulder, and sure enough, there's a tiny <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[Frog Hayden]">> <<option "[Salamander Hayden]">> <</cycle>> on my shoulder, watching D get flailed around like a doll by Scylla in the background. <<linkreplace "Continue">><<type 80ms>>"Scyl—la! Li—sten—I—don't want—to hurt—you—or—any—one!"<</type>> If Hayden had popcorn, he'd be eating it right now. ---- * <<link "\"Omg, I thought you were completely gone!\"" "battle19">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Hayden! I'm so glad to see you!\"" "battle19">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"What happened to you?\"" "battle19">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"You kind of deserved that, honestly.\"" "battle19">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "I knew I didn't have anything to worry about. They wouldn't just kill off Hayden like that." "battle19">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "Y'know, I'm more worried about D..." "battle19">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> <</linkreplace>>

<<if $text == 2>>"Save it for later, $name." Hayden drinks off a tiny vial from his belt, as he morphs into a tiny bipedal cat. "D*** anomalies did something to me. Even if I shift I'm still f****** tiny!"<<else>>"D*** anomalies did something to me." Hayden drinks off a tiny vial from his belt, as he morphs into a tiny bipedal cat. "Even if I shift I'm still f****** tiny!"<</if>> "Well, we seem to have a Lilliputian situation in our hands," I say. "Go check out Lorem's systems. Something seems to be sabotaging us from the inside." <<type 20ms>>"I am so—tsccchkzk—for whatever I have done in the past! Just save me from—bbzchkskkff—is eating me from the inside!11!"<</type>> "Might as well make myself useful." Hayden growls and jumps off my shoulder, back into the ship. "I am sorry I am not of much help, everyone," Phyrnne says. "The anomalies are too far for me to sense and try possessing. I am afraid I will get lost." ---- * <<link "\"Uh... you can be our moral support?\"" "battle20">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"It's okay, Phyrnne. You're still a valuable member of the team.\"" "battle20">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Just let us know if you can sense the jabberwock coming for us.\"" "battle20">><<set $text to 3>><</link>>

<<cacheaudio "simple" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/5uvk2lfdna9fuqf/simplicity_f.ogg?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "clash">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> <<if $text == 1>>"You can do it, $nn and Jessica!"<<elseif $text == 2>>"It just feels terrible, feeling everything but not seeing anything or being able to help."<<else>>"Alright, I will do my best."<</if>> The force fields flickers in and out of existence, and finally it shuts off. With the barrier gone, the flying $animals and the jabberwock take their chance and swoop toward us. "You're taking your sweet time, Rnst…" Jessica covers my six as she shifts her bionic arm to a spiky gauntlet, and activates <<cycle "$temp2">> <<option "[an azure rune]">> <<option "[a crimson rune]">> <<option "[an amethyst rune]">> <<option "[a viridian rune]">> <<option "[an amber rune]">> <</cycle>>. I ready my weapons again. We need to keep them off Rnst at all costs—she's our only chance of surviving this right now. ---- * <<link "Use the suit's cloak to dodge their swooping attacks." "battle21">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "I try to dodge as best as I can and trick them into hitting each other." "battle21">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> <<if $flight == true>> * <<link "Fly off and try to outmaneuver the $animals." "battle21">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> <<else>> * It'd be really nice to have the jetpack right now...<</if>>

<<if $text == 1>>With me suddenly gone out of their sights, they turn their focus on Jessica instead. "Holy f***." Jessica flies off on her jetpack as she tries to shake the $animals off her trail. "Thank you so much, $nn!" "I didn't mean it!" …Or did I? "Jess!" I say, briefly showing my location. "Lead them near me so I can get a good hit in!" "Got it!" She flies around the ship one more time, getting a better angle, and she swoops in near my position, where I can get a clear hit in with my $weapon. "That's it," I whisper. "Come to $parent." But something unexpected happens when I land my attack.<<elseif $text == 2>>I narrowly dodge their first two attacks, but it sends me horribly out of balance. I scramble to my feet again as the one of them tries to swoop in again, but thankfully Jessica manages to tackle it in time as she zooms by with her jetpack. I can't get any attacks in like this. "You alright there, $nn?" she says. "That was too close." "Thanks," I say as I almost get hit by the other's $elemental breath. "Wait, I got an idea. Line up with me and let's try making them hit each other." "Got it!" She flies around the ship one more time, getting a better angle, and she swoops in towards my position. "That's it," I whisper. "Come to $parent." I jump out of the way just as Jessica suddenly flies back up—and their $elemental breaths ends up hitting each other instead. Stunned from attacking each other, we take our chance and start hitting them with our weapons. But something unexpected happens.<<else>><<if $clothes == "armor">>Jessica's right. The jetpack's very intuitive to control—and now that I can fly around, it's much easier to dodge their massive bodies and attacks.<<else>>But of course, they're not the only ones who can fly—and no doubt I'm much more agile than these $animals.<</if>> "That's it," I whisper. "Come to $parent." The $animals try to coordinate their $elemental breath to hit me and Jessica, but they're simply too slow for us, especially with their massive bodies. They pause to prepare another $elemental attack, so we take our chance and start hitting them with our weapons. But something unexpected happens.<</if>> Instead of fading, cotton erupts into the air from the body parts I hit—they're not illusions, they're stuffed toys that gained sentience for some reason. That can breathe $elemental. We glance at each other momentarily, and continue our onslaught, producing a cotton shower… until they shrink down into lifeless stuffed $animals on the ground. But before we can celebrate, we hear Phyrnne screaming. "$nn! Watch out!" The jabberwock lands on me from behind, pinning me down with its massive claws, as it starts growing even larger—large enough to start tipping The Nautilus over the side. <<button "Continue" "battle22">><</button>>

Jessica manages to evade the attack, and starts shooting the dragon from her bionic arm as she circles around it. The jabberwock, however, is not made from cotton. "Arrghhh! Get it off me!" I shout, trying to remember what its weaknesses are—wait, that's it! "Try hitting it with a vorpal blade!" "What the h***'s a vorpal blade?" "It's… arghh—it's a made up word. I bet you can just hit it with any weapon from your arm and call it vorpal." "On it!" Jessica flies behind it, and transforms her bionic arm into <<cycle "$temp">> <<option "[a sword]">> <<option "[an axe]">> <<option "[a flail]">> <<option "[a water gun]">> <</cycle>>. It sparkles in the alien moonlight, and… "Stop!" exclaims Phyrnne. "It is not… it is not trying to attack us!" Jessica stops mid-attack and hovers in place. "What?" The jabberwock roars, and for once, we can finally understand it thanks to the Babel worm. <<linkreplace "Continue">> <<type 40ms>>"Skree~! Stooop! We-don't-want-fight! We-just-want-leave!"<</type>> But the jabberwock just pins me down further, and smacks the stationary Jessica with its tail. <<button "Continue" "battle23">><</button>> <</linkreplace>>

Phyrnne screams a… what I would guess is an ear-shattering scream if not for the Babel worm, and the jabberwock loosens its weight. When I open my eyes back up, water whips are forming around the jabberwock, trying to pull it off me—just enough for me to escape its catching claws. I scramble out of its reach, and with my $weapon knocked off into the other side of the ship, I grab my CANon blasters which are thankfully still attached to my hip, and switch the setting to... * <<link "...tranquilizer rounds." "battle24">><</link>> * <<link "...taser rounds." "battle24">><</link>> * <<link "...vorpal rounds?" "battle24">><</link>>

And with my butt still on the floor, I start shooting at the trapped dragon, and Jessica, no longer flying, walks up beside me and loads in the bird net she got from Escheria into her bionic arm. She activates a golden rune and a blank rune on her wrist, and fires—shocking the dragon and shrinking it down to what I guess is its normal size. She offers me a hand back up with her bionic arm. "That's what I call, a vorpal net." I accept her hand and stand up. We turn towards Phyrnne, finally releasing the water whips around the incapacitated dragon. "I didn't know you're also a waterbender, Phyrnne." "I had no idea either," Jessica says. "Were you keeping that from us the whole time?" "I… I had no idea I can do that," Phyrnne whispers as she floats slowly towards us, tears falling down her cheeks. "Oh Alma, Agustin…" <<button "Continue" "battle25">><</button>>

Our attention turns to Scylla when she roars once more. She's grabbed D and shaking them with her tentacles like a rattle… until it finally slows down. "Wow, uhh…" D mumbles through the comms. "I uh… that took you guys long… long enough…" "Rny!" Phyrnne exclaims as she floats in circles toward her. "You did it!" But Rnst is not responding. "This is our chance," Phyrnne says. "We don't know how long Rnst can control Scylla." "Hayds?" Jessica asks. "How's the situation there?" "Found the culprits. Lorem's starting back up now but our flight and weapon systems need repair." "I don't think we have time for that," Jessica says. "Phyrnne, you think you can possess the biblio-tractor beam cannon and fire it?" "I have only tried firing the laser cannon before, but I do not see why I should not be able to do it. Hold on, Rny!" Finally, we're turning the fight around. ---- * <<link "We're not out of the woods yet. We shouldn't get cocky." "battle26">><</link>> * <<link "I'm gonna need a long shower after this." "battle26">><</link>> * <<link "Lorem better give us ten times the experience for this one." "battle26">><</link>> * <<link "Is this how all of their fights go? I didn't expect my first mission to be this intense." "battle26">><</link>> * <<link "Ahhh! Stop thinking of other reactions! I need to focus." "battle26">><</link>>

Rnst has gotten full control of Scylla, but still, the flying school bus is too fast and high up for her tentacles to reach. "Firing the tractor beam cannon, in three… two… one…" The tractor beam cannon glows and starts firing into the sky. "I cannot see where I am firing!" "I got ya!" Thankfully, with D finally free and unentangled from Scylla's dance party, they fly full speed in front of the school bus, pushing against it and redirecting its flight path into the tractor beam. And slowly but surely, the most troublesome school bus in literary history starts getting pulled towards the ship. The anomalies aren't giving up without a tug of war, however. A comically oversized fan pops out the back, and an even larger tornado starts propelling them forward—strong enough to pull ahead of the beam's gravity pull. "I knew they'd try something like that." Jessica flies up near the bus and shoots a rune-enhanced cable from her arm to wrap around the bus. <<if $flight == true>>"$name! Help me pull the bus!" "No need to tell me twice."<</if>> "We still do not have enough narrativium reserves!" Phyrnne announces. "We need more power! Quick, go say some words! The longer the better!" Oh, so that's why it's called a biblio-tractor beam cannon. ---- * <<link "\"Long words!\"" "battle27">><</link>> * <<link "\"Elongate!\"" "battle27">><</link>> * <<link "\"Expletive!\"" "battle27">><</link>> * <<link "\"Yottaparsec!\"" "battle27">><</link>> * <<link "\"Defenestration!\"" "battle27">><</link>> * <<link "\"Sesquipedalian!\"" "battle27">><</link>> * <<link "\"Extra-terrestrial!\"" "battle27">><</link>> * <<link "\"Klaatu barada nikto!\"" "battle27">><</link>> * <<link "\"Incomprehensibilities!\"" "battle27">><</link>> * <<link "\"Antidisestablishmentarianism!\"" "battle27">><</link>> * <<link "\"Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!\"" "battle27">><</link>> * <<link "\"Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia!\"" "battle27">><</link>> * <<link "\"The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog!\"" "battle27">><</link>> * <<link "\"Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo!\"" "battle27">><</link>>

With the tractor beam empowered, we're starting to win the tug of war again, pulling the bus low enough for Rnst to grab the bus with Scylla's tentacles. <<type 20ms>>"Hey, don't leave me out of the fun." Two FOOBAR drones come out of the ship, but from the looks of it, Lorem's only doing it just to say it assisted with the capture.<</type>> The tractor beam needs more power. <<linkreplace "Let's finish this.">>Let's finish this. ---- * <<link "\"Machiavellian!\"" "battle28">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Antediluvian!\"" "battle28">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Fahrenheit!\"" "battle28">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Circumlocution!\"" "battle28">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Bibliographical!\"" "battle28">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Canonical!\"" "battle28">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Autological!\"" "battle28">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Gravitational!\"" "battle28">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Tattarrattat!\"" "battle28">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Hyperbole!\"" "battle28">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Denouement!\"" "battle28">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Deus Ex Machina!\"" "battle28">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Cliffhanger!\"" "battle28">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"In Auctorem Credimus!\"" "battle28">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> <</linkreplace>>

<<if $text == 2>>The receptionist I met earlier was right. 'In Auctorem Credimus' does sound like a magic spell. <</if>>With that last burst of power, the school bus's rocket boosters finally sputter out. The tractor beam cannon stops firing, Scylla releases the bus, and the bus glows a light blue as it ghastily floats into the Nautilus' hangar. Phyrnne must've transferred her spirit over—it's not really a surprise if she can fire the tractor beam with the weapon systems offline. [[We did it.|after1]]

<<cacheaudio "soft" "https://www.dropbox.com/s/v1m9h3rtdlc0gie/thesoftlullaby_f.ogg?raw=1">><<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set _oldmusic to $music>><<audio _oldmusic fadeoverto 2 0>><<timed 2s>><<audio _oldmusic stop>><<set $music to "simple">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</timed>><</if>> Everyone in the squad cheers, except for Hayden. We hear Hayden on the comms, finally back to his normal voice. "Jessica? You planning on making this fella blue again?" "Oh, right, right!" Jessica says as <<if $flight == true>>we land<<else>>she lands<</if>> back on the ship. "Black ICE protocol, deactivate." <<type 20ms>>Lorem turns back to its normal blue temperament. "Oh come on, Jessica! Those suckers destroyed so many of my drones! Our drones, Jessica! You're not gonna let me get some payback?!"<</type>> "What happened to calling me Lady Jessica?" <<type 20ms>>"Oh, I could think of a few things to call you."<</type>> "You did j******* during the battle, Lorem," D says as he lands beside us. <<type 20ms>>"Try getting your insides eaten."<</type>> ---- * <<link "I did it! I survived my first actual mission!" "after2">><</link>> * <<link "I wish I could've done more, but at least I wasn't totally useless like Lorem was." "after2">><</link>> * <<link "I understand why the squad's been here for a long time now. This is a lot better than being a boring bibilioanthropologist." "after2">><</link>> * <<link "Honestly? Not bad for my first mission." "after2">><</link>>

Phyrnne unpossesses the bus and floats straight toward Rnst. "Oh no…" <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST Don't mind me, P. My therapy session can wait. Let's take care of the anomalies first.</div> "If you're sure…" <div style="text-align: center; margin-left: 80px; margin-right: 80px">RNST You felt Scylla's rage and suffering too, didn't you?</div> "It was impossible to ignore." "You better not let these jokers escape." Hayden growls. "I uh… you guys know where to find me." D snickers and approaches me. "He's in the restroom, by the way," they whisper. "His serums have that side effect." "Speaking of not letting them escape," Jessica says as she grabs a gray ball-shaped thing from her power armor. "I think we're forgetting something. Come, $nn, I'll show you something." <<button "Continue" "after3">><</button>>

"This is a containment ball," Jessica says as she leads me back to where the jabberwock is trapped. "This is what we use to capture monsters and other creatures. It'll immobilize them inside, but the creature usually needs to be unconscious or incapacitated, or else it'll escape." She tosses one towards me. "Here, you go try it. Just throw it on the dragon-creature-thingy." And a-one, and a-two, and a-three! I throw the containment ball towards the jabberwock. Its body pulses with a bright light a second later, its body getting sucked inside the ball as it momentarily floats in the air. And then I catch the ball just as it falls. Jessica spots the two stuffed toys from earlier and picks them up. "Now to release the creature, you just need to press the button on the middle, and throw it onto the location you want to release the creature." ---- * <<link "\"Interesting. But isn't that inhumane?\"" "after4">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Can I use this to catch a pet?\"" "after4">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Oh, I know. One of the worlds I studied actually has a videogame where you catch creatures with these 'containment balls' and make them fight with each other.\"" "after4">><<set $text to 3>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>"Nah. For the creature, it's like no time has passed, but they can recover from their injuries while inside.<<elseif $text == 2>>"You could, but you need to register your catch with CANon to make sure it doesn't cause any plot holes."<<else>>"Really? I'd… I'd love to play that."<</if>> She tucks the ball back in her armor, and sits on the edge of the ship's wing. "Stay with me for a moment?" I glance back at the now dormant school bus, and sit beside her. Jessica stares at the alien night sky, full of unusually bright constellations we never laid our eyes upon before. I didn't notice it earlier, but there's even a faint ring around the planet. ---- * <<link "\"Look, there's an elephant!\"" "after5">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Look, there's a dragon!\"" "after5">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Look, there's a lizard!\"" "after5">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Look, there's a penguin!\"" "after5">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Look, there's a squid!\"" "after5">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Look, there's a smiley face!\"" "after5">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"Look, there's a star!\"" "after5">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Look, there's a starfish!\"" "after5">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "Just stargaze silently." "after5">><<set $text to 3>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>"Oh yeah, I think I see it!"<<elseif $text == 2>>"Really? That's what you see? A star?" "I mean, the stars are shaped like a star." "Oh yeah, I think I see it!"<</if>> "Congrats on your first ever mission, $nn," she says as a shooting star conveniently appears. ---- * <<link "\"Congrats to your... whatever number this mission is for you.\"" "after6">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"All in a day's work.\"" "after6">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"Ehh, I didn't think it was too hard.\"" "after6">><<set $text to 3>><</link>> * <<link "\"I didn't think my first day on the job would be this hard.\"" "after6">><<set $text to 4>><</link>> * <<link "\"I can see why you like this job.\"" "after6">><<set $text to 5>><</link>> * <<link "\"The stars are beautiful, aren't they? Like you.\"" "after6">><<set $text to 6>><</link>> * <<link "\"Aren't the stars beautiful?\"" "after6">><<set $text to 7>><</link>> * <<link "\"Come on, don't get too sappy on me now.\"" "after6">><<set $text to 8>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>She chuckles. "Congrats to us." We give each other a fist bump.<<elseif $text == 2>>"Well, we still got a lot to do after." She chuckles. "The fun part's over now though." "It is kind of fun."<<elseif $text == 3>>"You think we'd win anyway regardless of the choices you picked?" "Something like that."<<elseif $text == 4>>"Oh, trust me, it doesn't get any better." "Thanks for the encouragement." "I'm just being real. This job would drain any optimism you have." "How long have you been in the squad, anyway?" "Time is wibbly wobbly when you're moving from world to world. This is my 679th mission. We don't usually solve cases this quickly though." "I can believe that."<<elseif $text == 5>>She chuckles. "Oh, good. I'm starting to think I've lost my mind that I find it kind of enjoyable." "Or maybe we've both lost our minds."<<elseif $text == 6>>"I..." She smiles. "Come on, I'm sure you can think of a better pick-up line than that." "What? I'm Sirius." She bursts out into laughter and nudges me. "I... I don't even know why I laughed at that. You're worse than Lorem." Well, she likes Lorem a lot, so I'll take that as a compliment.<<elseif $text == 7>>"Yeah..." She smiles. "When I was younger I would often stargaze and imagine what it's like to be out there..." "I mean, who doesn't like stargazing?"<<else>>She scratches her head. "Sappy? Oh, you haven't seen me when I'm sappy." Oh no...<</if>> She lifts a leg onto the ship and rests her bionic arm on it. "Y'know, I just remembered something I overheard while I was at MetroKnome. The Avians believe that it's their ancestors and fallen loved ones that form the constellations. The brighter the star is, the more virtuous they were. And to think that it's all the characters that came before us watching us right now." She looks down at the space station ruins below. "It's sad and poetic and inspiring all at the same time." ---- * <<link "\"Technically, they'll be watching us a million years later if we go by light speed.\"" "after7">><<set $text to 1>><</link>> * <<link "\"How bright do you think our stars would be?\"" "after7">><<set $text to 2>><</link>> * <<link "\"$authorquestion\"" "after7">><<set $text to 3>><</link>>

<<if $text == 1>>She nudges me with her normal arm. "You had to ruin it, didn't you?"<<elseif $text == 2>>"Considering all the horrible things I've done, I'd be a black hole. But maybe someday I'll suck up a star that'll brighten me up again." "I don't think that's how stars work." She turns her gaze towards me. "We're all made up, $name. But it's the only thing going for me right now. But if I did find a star bright enough, maybe I wouldn't mind finishing my story with them."<<else>>"Huh? Who're you talking to?" I scratch the back of my head. "My author…" "Oh. I… I ask that question too sometimes."<</if>> I sigh. "I can't believe this all happened in one day." "I don't think—" "Uh, it's okay. Go on." And then we hear a loud whistling scream in the distance. Jessica stands up. "…We should get back inside. I don't think it's safe to stay on the dark side of this planet for too long." Right. [[We still need to deal with the anomalies.|cliff1]]

Before we begin, do you want to enable background music? * ''Author's Note:'' If the background music doesn't start playing after a while, please report them to the <a href="https://in-auctorem-credimus-if.tumblr.com/" target="_blank">IAC blog</a>. Thanks! ---- * <<link "Yes, I want to turn on background music." "e1">><<script>>settings.audioEnabled = true<</script>><</link>> * <<link "Shhh! Let's keep it quiet, okay?" "e1">><<script>>settings.audioEnabled = false<</script>><</link>>

<<if $shieldtarget == 2>>The shield ricochets off Scylla instead, but in her rage, one of her tentacles slams down near the ship... and swatting the drones like flies... as the FOOBARs fall snarklessly into the ocean. Hmm, maybe I shouldn't mess with it too much. It seems like the drones will get hit one way or another—maybe I'm making the anomalies stronger by trying to change the outcome of things? <<else>>The shield ricochets off the drones one by one, as the FOOBARs fall snarklessly into the ocean.<</if>> <<type 20ms>>"Are you kidding me?! My beautiful drones! What in tarnation are we even fighting?"<</type>> "It seems you need to triple the XP for this encounter, Lorem," Jessica teases. <<type 20ms>>"Who cares about the—" Lorem's voice glitches out.<</type>> "Lorem?" Jessica calls out. "Lorem!" <<button "Continue" "battle18">><</button>>

!!Update Log ''Feb. 1, 2022'' * Public Release * Cleaned up several formatting errors and typos. * Fixed several bugs and awkward flavor text. ---- ''Feb. 2, 2022'' * Fixed missing relationship variable and several typos. * Fixed bedtime story genre linking to the superhero branch. * Updated links at the end. ---- ''Feb. 3, 2022'' * Fixed several more typos and flavor text errors. ---- ''Feb. 5, 2022'' * Fixed even more formatting and flavor text errors. ---- ''Feb. 7, 2022'' * Added link to the <a href="https://forms.gle/vgbxzZEjJuXSLH8y5" target="_blank">IAC Survey</a>. * Fixed various typos and errors. * Removed spells from the sci-fi branch. ---- ''Feb. 8, 2022'' * Improved Babel worm typo and error detection. * The game should now launch in portrait mode for mobile users. ---- ''Feb. 17, 2022'' * More Babel worm improvements. * Even more formatting clean up. ---- ''Feb. 20, 2022'' * Updated links at the end. ---- * [[Let's begin!|audio]] * [[Read Content Warnings|warnings]]

"I was so worried you wouldn't recognize me anymore." Milana glances at the floor. But when I don't give her the same look of relief, her shoulders drop. "Oh no…" <<if $emotional == true>>I burst into tears as quietly as possible. She doesn't say anything else, but she keeps close, rubbing my back and offering me some water when I eventually calm down.<<else>>"It's okay…" I take a depp breath. "The TARDep will be able to help us, right?"<</if>> We both wait around wordlessly, but it's hard to ignore one of our coworkers, wrangling with two of her little gremlins. "Nakula! How did you even get the trowel from the suitcase?" Rumi notices us looking after a while, and whispers, "Sorry, had to bring my toddlers. Can't risk leaving them in the daycare with everything that's going on." "So much for leap days being the easiest time to travel between stories," Milana casually infodumps. "I woke up at five just for this." You know it's a particularly bad day when even Milana is grumpy. <<button "Continue" "canon17">><</button>>

A blast of cold air welcomes my face when I walk in. "Good morning!" the receptionist greets me with a surprisingly genuine cheerful voice. "Welcome to LiteraTours Travel Agency. How can I help you?" I do the eye shift thing from side to side, and whisper, <<link "\"In Auctorem Credimus.\"" "canon13">><</link>>

<<if settings.audioEnabled>><<set $music to "squid">><<audio $music volume 1 loop play>><</if>>There's a click—and then the lights turn red. <<type 50ms>>"INTRUDER ALERT. INTRUDER ALERT."<</type>> ---- * <<link "\"No wait, I'm a TARDIS agent! I'm just looking for Squad 626!\"" "ship6">><<set $text to 1>><<set $pee to false>><</link>> * <<link "\"Wait, I just want to ask for directions!\"" "ship6">><<set $text to 1>><<set $pee to false>><</link>> * <<link "\"This has to be a prank, right?\"" "ship6">><<set $text to 1>><<set $pee to false>><</link>> * <<link "I'm not risking it against a murder AI. Run away!" "ship6">><<set $text to 2>><<set $pee to false>><</link>> * <<link "//I freeze and pee myself.//" "ship6">><<set $text to 3>><<set $pee to true>><</link>>

"Okay…" Jessica snickers. "Are you done gloating now, L?" <<type 20ms>>"For now," Lorem says, back in its more playful voice. "You know you're the last one I'd kill if I revert back to my Cold War personality, Jess."<</type>> "That's reassuring…" she says with a strained smile. ---- * <<link "Well, if Lorem wanted me dead—or any of the squad members—we'd be dead now." "intro1">><</link>> * <<link "I still don't trust Lorem, but I'll admit that it's got an interesting personality." "intro1">><</link>> * <<link "I will never be comfortable on this ship..." "intro1">><</link>> * <<link "You know what's crazier than Lorem? Me wanting to know more about Lorem. How messed up is that?" "intro1">><</link>>