The Question: Interlude

(align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[OMG OMG OMG] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==SO] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==you’re not gonna believe this] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==and i’m literally only telling you bc you live like a thousand miles away an will never meet the person i’m talking about] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==u-maz is only 347 miles away from ur campus but continue] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==SO] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==you know the hot guy i talk abt sometimes] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==“sometimes” 🙄] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==shut up] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==im just saying] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==i know too much about this man for someone who has never met him] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==i could prob fill out one of those big govt dossier files entirely based on our chats] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==I KNOW A NORMAL AMOUNT OF THINGS ABOUT HIM =^=] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==but that’s not the point] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==i] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==kind of confessed to him??? i guess??????] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==oh shit congrats gurl] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==that’s a big step] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==proud of u fr ❤️] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==it all happened so fast @_@] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==like varsha basically pushed me into the whole thing and set us up on a study date kinda] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==cute] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==well she said i needed help in calculus and asked if he could help me] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==isnt that a plot point in mean girls or something] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==no cady pretends that she’s bad at math so aaron samuels will tutor her even tho she’s like a mega math whiz] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==i am *actually* bad at math] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==yes queen the asian rep weve been asking for 🙌] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==btw full disclosure, i have never seen mean girls] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==WHAT] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==no okay i’m not getting derailed but we are streaming that together this weekend] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==it’s a classic] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==eh idk] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==you don’t understand this movie is iconic] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==the number of quotable lines is unreal] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==and it's like actually really good okay i love this movie ;_;] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==cant believe im saying this but werent u talking about ur crush] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==oh dammit] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==it’s your fault for getting me all heated] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==disrespecting mean girls like that `>.>`] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==but yes] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==so i show up at his dorm room] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==how long did it take u to knock?] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==a normal amount of time stop bullying me ;_;] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==he opens the door in GRAY SWEATPANTS and a TANK TOP] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==and boy has GUNS] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==i want so badly to make fun of u for the horniness lvl here but grey sweats are top tier so i cant even say shit] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==it was like. bad] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==but he lets me in and he’s all sweet like “i’ve got my notes, i can help you out” and it’s so cute] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==did u sit next to each other and lean in close while he showed u how to find derivatives] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==😩 ooh baby logarithms can be tricky so dont forget to check the value positions 😏 and speaking of positions…👅💦] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==YOU’RE SO GROSS WTF] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==it didn’t even get that far] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==i just freaked out and confessed on the spot] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==oh shit] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==and] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==gurl u r KILLING me] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==tell me what happened or else 🔫🔫🔫] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==it was] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==um] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==he kind of] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==i think he came out to me?] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==oh] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==did not expect] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==i mean he’s not gay i don’t think] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==or maybe he is, but he didn’t say that] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==it Felt like coming out] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==i was (okay this is embarrassing) kind of like gushing about how he’s like the perfect guy and stuff] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==and he said he wasn’t a guy] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==but he’s not a girl either] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==and we had this whole convo abt it sort of] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==mostly i listened to him talk] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==oh so theyre nonbinary?] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==i...guess so? i dont really know a lot about that stuff. i tried to give him advice but i was rly just winging it] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==oh shit `***they`] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==it’s fine, he didnt tell u to switch pronouns, right?] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==u dont have to, like] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==magically intuit his “true” pronouns if he hasn’t even told u what to use yet] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==YEAH BUT] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==IM LIKE THE FIRST PERSON HES EVER TOLD I THINK] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==I RLY RLY RLLLLLLY WANNA BE A GOOD FRIEND AND ALLY AND AND AND ;___;] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==i feel like…. i gotta be perfect] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==i gotta know exactly what to do and say] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==bc if i dont then what if he goes back into the closet] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==or like decides not to ever come out to anyone else bc i was so awful] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==fuckfuckffukcufkcu] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==take a breath hun] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==look, he already decided to tell u this stuff. he trusts you that much] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==but i feel like it wasn’t because of me as a person tho] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==it felt more like it’s been building up inside of him for a long time] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==and i was just the catalyst for it finally all coming out] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==we don’t even know each other] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==like i know i talk about him all the time and i know all of this stuff about him] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==and we maybe even talked once or twice when we had a class together last year] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==but as he was telling me everything it was like being smacked in the fact with the fact that i DON’T know him] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==not really] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==and ik this is awful so pls don’t make fun of me but like…] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==it made me feel rly small] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==i thought knowing everything would make me this perfect girlfriend] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==but i didn’t know the biggest thing about the guy i like] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==liked] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==not a guy either, fuck] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==u cant beat urself up about that carrie] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==like. shit. okay] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==babe i say this with love: this isnt about u] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==i know that! fuck i’m sorry i’m re aly trying to not make it all about mme] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==no no no thats not what i meant] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==like yea im glad u get that but] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==the whole point of being in the closet is that ppl DONT know this big thing abt u] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==but…] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==okay can i ask something that might sound really stupid/assholish? i promise i don’t mean it in a mean way] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==yyyea] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==i was pretty sure i knew that you weren’t straight even before you came out] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==like i just had this feeling] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==i mean fair i was a total glass closet] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==but u didnt know about laurel, right?] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==no, that totally blew me away] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==god if i had known she was gay back in hs i TOTALLY would have asked her out] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==i had the worst crush on her ;__;] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==yes we all remember that] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==also no way in hell would u have asked her out u were even more socially anxious back then] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==but thats the thing] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==everyone is different] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==some ppl are better at hiding their secrets than others] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==whether they want to be or not] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==sounds like ur person was really good at it] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==its not a reflection on u for not knowing] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==jokes aside gaydar is not infallible and neither is, idk, gender-dar? gen-dar? u get it] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==that’s true. i just felt so shitty after he told me how disconnected he feels to the whole concept of being A Man, when literally like two minutes earlier i was going on about what a perfect manly man he is] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==like he basically said that kind of stuff is why he’s stayed in the closet for so long] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==ok heres an example: remember when u came out to me in middle school?] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==we were sitting on the swings at the park near ur house, talking abt random shit] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==and u went quiet for a minute, just digging a hole in the mulch with the toe of ur shoe] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==and then u turned back to me and tears were streaming down ur face] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==and u said “i think i like girls”] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==do u remember what i said?] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==if memory serves, you said “oh SHIT” and fell off your swing] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==“if memory serves” u know exactly what i said] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==that stupid fool thing i did will live in both of our minds forever] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==but did me being a dipshit send you back into the closet?] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==that’s not the same tho, we were kids] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==did it?] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==… no] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==thats right. it didnt] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==because after i helped you up off the ground, you threw your arms around me and hugged me and said you loved me] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==sure did. never even brushed off the woodchips. mom was pissed that i dragged them all in the house when i came home that evening] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==omg you never told me about that part] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==that totally sounds like her] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==but u get my point right? even tho i said smth stupid it didnt wipe away my good intentions] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==oh wait shit and didnt u say u stayed for a while after he came out to u?] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==yeah, we talked for a little bit until his roommate came back unexpectedly and kind of broke the atmosphere] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==he gave me his number when i left] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==dude] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==he gave u his NUMBER] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==AFTER everything happened] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==that is like the most obviously obvious sign that hes not holding a grudge or resenting u for not reacting in some impossible perfect way] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==carrie u know i love u but u r a whole dumbass (affectionate)] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==the smart part of my brain knows you’re prob right] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==but also: what if he just did that bc he felt like he had to] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==he hasn’t texted me] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==has it been even 2 full hrs since u talked] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==no] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==have u texted him?] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==no] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==ma’am. MA’AM.] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==you’re right you’re right you’re right] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==i’m overthinking all of this] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==thanks for talking me down] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==i do have a lot of experience in wrangling the anxious carrie brain. ill have to raise my rates soon] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==jkjkjk. its no prob. im always happy to talk to u] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==`<333`] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==if u need any more help or specific nonbinary info, i can hook u up w some resources too] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==send u some links] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==mail u some pamphlets] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==ik you’re joking but that might actually be helpful] (text-colour:#4353e8)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[=(click: ?page)[==i gotchu bb] (align:"==>")+(box:"=X")[(click: ?page)[==oh, hang on, i just got a notification] (text-colour:red)[(align:"=><=")[[[NEW MESSAGE->NewMessage]]]]

(t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-delay:2s)[(text-colour:gray)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[Hey, Carrie, it’s Hamza. Sorry that things got a little weird tonight. Not really the kind of “confession” you were expecting, I bet? Ha ha. Thank you for hearing me out anyway. It felt really good to get it off my chest. You’re a good listener.]]] (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-delay:4s)[(text-colour:gray)[(align:"<==")+(box:"X=")[So anyway, if you wanted to hang out again sometime soon, I’d like that. Let me know.]]] (t8n:"dissolve")+(t8n-delay:6s)[(align:"=><=")[[[RESPOND?->Ending]]]]

(text-colour:#faa2c1)[ #//The End// thanks to (text-colour:#ffc9c9)[kalina] for the in-depth calculus crash course and a very special thanks to [[you->you]], the reader. i hope you enjoyed this game. [[PLAY AGAIN?->Story]]]