Dr.Pum (recent)
"Ms.Jinya, as I said, deja vu is a common psychological phenomenon that most people experienced, it’s hard to be defined as an illness or issue as you mentioned, so I cannot make a prescription for you. However, if your situation really badly influenced your life, I strongly suggest you to do the behavior training I recommended last week. Try to employ quick, small and safe behavior, such as sliding on your phone, take a drink of water, writing or drawing something to replace the anxiety while you fall into Deja vu. Those illusions will be gone and your life will get back on track. Hope you doing well."
Dr.Pum (recent)
"And, sorry about your economic condition, I will be glad when you decide to restart our psychological counselling at anytime. Good luck."Mom (long time ago)
"How is the job? Do your boss and peers like you?"
Mom (long time ago)
"Say something, you are always selfish like this, don’t you think me and your father are worrying about you? We are your parents! "
Mom (long time ago)
"You must go outside to work, you are twenty-three. Billy, our neighborhood, you remember? That kid has..."
Mom (recent)
"We have been patient enough, come back right now, we will find a man for you to marry. That's the best option for you."
Green binary code continuously slid on the screen, heaven birds without wings flied cross the blue sky, dusty aubergine jelly broke on the ground and empty ark lonely drifted by the sea......All the pictures emerged in your mind...again. You lay on the bed and stared at the empty vase on the bedside cabinet, a strange thought arose, you are so quite sure that there was flower in it. Is it disappeared for some reason? or is it just the problem in your mind?
You
"Again...Jinya, stop thinking, it's useless, you are wasting your time."
You
"You need your phone, Jinya, pick it up, use it and find a chance to sleep. "
-[[Pick up your phone (next)]]
You
"Listen to the doctor, it works. "
"In fact, you like social media, right? Admit it."
You opened the social media on your phone, there are a few new messages:
[[Dr.Pum]]
[[Mom]]
[[Graduate group]]
[[(next)]]
-___---_- (recent)
"Ms.Jinya, May I have a daannce withh -ou?"
[[Ignore (next)]]
[["What? Who are you? How do you know me?" (next)]]After a few seconds, a new message is arrived.
-___---_- (recent)
“I am_--- att yoyur doorstep, you can_--=- see me m?- there.”
You looked at a message, a terrible image appeared in your mind, you feel...
[[Fear (next)]]
[[Angry (next)]]After a few seconds, a new message is arrived.
-___---_- (recent)
“I am_--- att yoyur doorstep, you can_--=- see me m?- there.”
You looked at a message, a terrible image appeared in your mind, you feel...
[[Fear (next)]]
[[Angry (next)]]Suddenly, you received a new message from a stranger with a weird name:
[[-___---_- (next)]]
By Qihao Qiu
RMIT - s3767652You
"Fear, I know. Breathe first, breathe slowly."
"Listen, there are many possibilities, it is a very low chance to be harassed by a real stalker."
"So calm down, It's just a prank. For the worst, you still have a door between you, a firmly locked door."
[[Keep staying on the bed and reply "I don't know you, If you continue to text me like that, I will call the police." (next)]]
[[Get up and go to the living room (next)]]You
"Angry, huh? You should be, but I know you are not brave enough to rush out to scold him."
"If he is there."
"Calm down, It's just a prank, get yourself a drink and ignore it."
[[Keep staying on the bed and reply "What's wrong with you?" (next)]]
[[Get up and go to the living room (next)]]
Your living room is still empty, dark and quite. Because of your aversion to sound and sunlight those belongs to that world, all the windows and curtain are always shut in your house. As always, nothing is changed tonight, there is no sound around your place including the other side of door. You are sensitive to the sound, clearly, there is no one at the door, unless that stalker is a ghost.
You once thought about if you suicide there, nobody will find out.
You wanted to get some drink, so you move toward the fridge. At the moment, phone ringed.
-___---_- (recent)
“I have a surprise for you. In your fridge.”
This time, strong fear comes to you.
You
"He is just frightening you, it is your house, your fridge."
"But...If there is really something in it, like...a dead rat, like you onced received in the locker at school."
Emotions are engulfing you, you looked at the fridge. It's time to make decision.
[[Back to your bedroom (next)]]
[[Open the fridge (next)]]
You replied strongly, but anxiety didn't be spilled out with your words, fear and worries keep growing in this small dark room. You were waiting for this man's response, a reassuring response. Finally, phone ringed.
-___---_- (recent)
“I have a -_=surprixe= for youu. ''-_---In your fridge.”
This time, strong fear came to you.
[[Go to the living room (next)]]
[[Stay in the bedroom (next)]]You replied strongly, but anxiety didn't be spilled out with your words, fear and worries keep growing in this small dark room. You were waiting for this man's response, a reassuring response. Finally, phone ringed.
-___---_- (recent)
“I have a -_=surprixe= for youu. ''-_---In your fridge.”
This time, strong fear came to you.
You
"He is just frightening you, it is your house, your fridge."
"But...If there is really something in it, like...a dead rat, like you once received in the locker at school."
Emotions were engulfing you, it's time to make the decision.
[[Get up and go to the living room (next)]]
[[Stay in the bedroom (next)]]Bedroom is always the safest place for you. About that, it recalls a weird feeling you had recently, sometimes, you feel someone is watching you, the sight is not from somewhere else, it's exactly from your room and it's weirder that the sight didn't make you feel any uncomfortable.
Your phone rings.
-___---_- (recent)
“Good morningyrrx-_, Jinya, Ii bring new_-_--_ carnation to you today. It smells so good.”
You looked toward the vase, a fresh pink carnation is in there. About ten minutes ago, there is nothing. Perhaps, you didn't realize that, that this moment, you only knew that pink carnation is your favourite flower..
[[Getting close to the vase]]Sudden courage helps you open the fridge.
There is nothing scary, the only unusual thing inside is a basket. The basket is filled with raspberry jelly."
A new message from that man is sent to you.
-___---_- (recent)
"Happy _----_ irthday!"
-___---_- (recent)
"Ras xx--_= pberry jelly, that's your favourite, riight?"
[["Today is my birthday?" (next)]]Bedroom is always the safest place for you. About that, it recalled a weird feeling you had recently, sometimes, you felt someone is watching you, the sight was not from somewhere else, it's exactly from your room and it's weirder that the sight didn't make you feel any uncomfortable.
Your phone ringed.
-___---_- (recent)
“Good morningyrrx-_, Jinya, Ii bring new_-_--_ carnation to you today. It smells so good.”
You looked toward the vase, a fresh pink carnation is in there.
[[Close to the vase]]You
"Yes? Maybe? Who cares about your birthday, even yourself don't like your birthday."
“It's not the point, the point is that is your favourite, it’s true.”
“Which means this one is not just a stalker. He must...”
[["I want to see him." (next)]]A fervent wish arose from your deep heart, you want to see this man. so you walked close to the door.
[[Open the door]]
[[Watch though door viewer]]Through the glass and water, something else is tucked under the vase. You drew it out, it looks like a ticket...but to where?
A new message from that mystery man.
-___---_- (recent)
“Knock--, knock_-. Jinya, Read-yy to g_o?”
-___---_- (recent)
"Knoc--k, knockk-_, A_t your door. Flight to---——-_ Australia is ready to go!"
[[Get up and go to the living room (next)]] Professor (long time ago)
"To everyone, the graduate party finally comes! It's at 7 p.m in the town hall, all the seniors and junior in these three years are invited and welcome to join in us. Hope I can see you there!"
Professor (ten minutes ago)
"Just a reminder, party will be held as scheduled tomorrow. Of course, graduates are very welcome to be here and share your working experience with your juniors. It's for free, but don't forget to bring your ticket you applied in uni."
Curiosity or fear, no matter which it is. It got up the courage inside of you, made you finally open the door. It has been a long time since you last opened it.
There is nobody standing in front of your door. You leaned out to watch around, it's empty as always. Those lights deep in the hallway are voice-activated, they are turned off, you can't see far, it makes you ensure that that man is not here.
At this moment, phone rings.
-___---_- (recent)
“Knock_--=, knock. Jinya, Rea=_--dy to go?”
[[Reply"I have known that you are not there."]]Empty hallway with no light and sound.
[[Open the door]]"You are not there." It sounds disappointing, a wording mistake, but it's okay. When you are ready to back to your room, a new message arrived.
-___---_- (recent)
“Jinya, it wii--_-ll be sounds strange///, but please listen to me--_. ”
-___---_- (recent)
“I wa-nt you_- to go outs-_-ide, not too far, just walk through the corridor an-__=/-dd open the door. ”
-___---_- (recent)
“I know,-__-__---_ it's hard for you, and I know, you have always been afraid of the dark.-- It's okay to take it slow_-ly.”
-___---_- (recent)
“I will be waiting for you _--=at the end of it, all the time.”
You are a timid person, at least it's how you evaluate yourself. when you face with difficult choices, you always choose the safest option to protect yourself. You thought that you are not strong enough, had no courage to face life, so you have always encased yourself in the most comfortable environment, been doing the most accustomed things day after day. Even stepping out of this door, it seems happened a long, long time ago.
So why should you be swayed out of your safety zone because of a stranger's words? Once again,you looked toward the long corridor. There are weak lights nearby, but a few steps away, they are endless darkness. Dark is one of your deepest fears.
That's right, you are afraid of dark. How did he know? and why is 'he'? Are you really sure that you don't know him?
"All the time', What does it mean? If you don't walk out the door, he will be wait there until tomorrow? Then if you leave there after one month or one year, Is he going to stay there for that long time? Will he?
You do not like those words, 'world', 'forever', 'love', those empty words are too far away from you, they are beautiful therefore unreal, so you never believed them. However, for the 'all the time' by this man, even it's just a message, somehow, it's reassuring to you.
At this moment, all the chaotic thought and sound in your mind are relieved with your fear, that peace you don't know where it came from pushed you to make the decision you may never make.
[[Walk out the door]]Last time, you looked back to your house where you have been in for a long time, resolutely walked out and closed the door.
You faced to the darkness in front of you and walked into it. You don't know why, none of the lights are turned on, it's like they are broken together tonight. You wanted to go back, but every backstep you wanted to make evoked different images in your mind. In classroom, office and house, you always attempted to do that, to make backstep.
Meanwhile, a horrible sound you heard from the dark around you, it's like, a swarm of tiny creatures disorderly crawling on the wall, they are all peeping at you and saying something.
"Untalented kid."
"You can't make it."
"Awkward woman."
"Go home!"
"This world won't accept you."
You squatted on the ground and covered your ears, but those sounds still came in over and over.
You
"Jinya, It's enough!"
That voice inside of you appeared again. You called her you, another you thought in different way, but only for protecting you.
You
"You are not brave as you thought, always! Every time you tried to be an intrepid girl, did any once bring good memory to you? You forgot them?"
You
"Those sounds are annoying, but they are right, they are reminding you."
You
"Jinya...GO, BACK."
You wanted to refute, but you didn't know how, because she is right, they are...right.
This moment, phone rings.
[[Check your phone]]-___---_- (recent)
“Do-n'_-t be af_--raid, I amm= w+ith y=ou-__.”
You replied
You (recent)
"It's so dark here, I want to go back."
-___---_- (recent)
“Do0n't be af_-raid, I a=m withh you-.”
You (recent)
"I can't make it, I can't."
-___---_- (recent)
“Don'_-t be a-fraid, I -am with/ you.”
You (recent)
“Can't you understand my language? I can't!”
-___---_- (recent)
“Don't_- be- afraid, I- am with you_.”
You (recent)
“You liar, you are not even there!”
-___---_- (recent)
“Don't be afraid, I am with you.”
No matter what you replied, he repeated this sentence. Hopelessness turned into rage that made you raised your right hand. Before you threw your phone to the ground, a light thing dropped out from your pocket. That is a wrinkled ticket that is for the graduate party tomorrow.
You picked the ticket up with trembling hands, a vague memory wrapped you around.
You sat on the stair in front of the hall with tears dry on your face, people were passing near you on the road, that made you feel more lonely. What were you here and what did happen to you? You didn't remember, all you knew is something happened next. One person came to you and said:
"What happened? Do you want to get in together? Don't be afraid, I am with you."
You looked up. Suddenly, one light brightened on after another. Light surrounded you, it's not such insufferable to you. And it's not you were hating the outer world, it's you were stuck in this place.
You saw the door at the end of the corridor, you walked to it and other doors on your right and left are opened.
[[Door1]]That is you. A middle-age happy you.
You were splashing water by the sea. A castle built with sand on the beach nearby, two names were engraved on it, one is yours, another one you can't see it.
You never knew you could be happy like this, like a stupid naive child.
You pointed to the sky with your finger, there are two birds with short wings flying across the sky above you. They were accompanying each other, only two in the world, but it's enough to fly away from all the loneliness in the world, then you looked at the place by your side and laughed, it's like there was someone else there.
[[Door2]] That is you. A young, timid you.
It was the first time you felt comfortable in such a crowded place. Someone was talking to you. You felt nervous at first, but that man soon made you relaxed.
You smiled. Then he asked:"Ms.Jinya, so...May I have a dance with you?"
You said yes.
You two started to dance awkwardly on the middle of dance floor. Perhaps, your skill was even better his. That dance looks so bad, but you enjoyed it very much.
[[Door3]] That is you. An older, mature you.
You sat on a cane chair in front of a log cabin, oil painted golden sunshine spilled on the plains, wind that came from the north, passed you and funnelling through the valley. It's a far valley in Ireland, the last station of your world tour. Before that, you have been arrived to the top of mount Everest, the south and north pole of the earth, the deepest sea, the highest sky. You reached them all.
About your career, you transitioned from a researcher to a doctor. You have saved thousands of lives whilst watched thousands of parting. You were no longer scared of expecting and disappointing, you understood the true meaning of world, forever and love. You couldn't even imagine that, but at that moment, you would know, that is life.
You wanted to thank someone, but suddenly you thought about the day of your part forever. Thank you is very similar to goodbye, you would definitely not want to say goodbye to that person, so you started to think about a better world that you would say at the final moment.
[[Door4]] That is you. An very old, dying you.
You couldn't move, you couldn't speak, you couldn't think. You were lying on the bed in a full white room. The only color in that room is from the pink carnation by your bed side.
The day was coming, it would reach you at anytime.
You saw a old man, he was nervously watching the screen of your electrocardio graph and keeping taking notes on his computer, two green meander lines, he could sit there and watch it for whole day. You didn't know what he was doing, but for no reason, you knew that he was doing it for you.
Suddenly, with a continuous alarm, your cardiogram started to float hardly, doctors and nurses came to you and busy around. That man didn't, he peacefully sat by your side, watched the screen one moment and looked at you the next.
You looked to the screen as he did, the shape of those two lines kept changing hardly, just like your life, so you recalled the thought in the Irish Valley, if your life is closing to the end, what's the shape of the final band of these lines? what's the last word you will say to that man?
At this moment, you know it.
It's "love".
[[Walk to the end door]] The door at the end opened slowly. You stepped in. The clear sky spread over the sea, sewed with golden beach into one piece. You did not realize that you have been wearing a pair of beautiful blue dancing shoes and a pure white dress. You saw a rickety little boat float on the sea. Somehow, you knew that you needed to go somewhere in that boat. Slowly, she walked to the boat. Until you was close enough, you saw a man was in the boat waiting for you.
You could not clearly see what the man looked like, but you knew, it's him. He had been waiting for a long time here. He gave his hand to you and you...
[[give your hand to him]]Published on the “Neo-bioscience magazine”:
After 2 years bio-electricity signal transcoding technology officially have came into use in healthcare industry, this story was told by new laboratory manager who was the assistant of doctor Dr.Renly. In the early stage of research, Dr. Renly once against the terms of laboratory, he secretly employed uncompleted prototype of bio-electricity signal transcoder in real case, for attempting to communicate with his wife who was in a deep coma caused by brain cancer. This great technology was far from mature today, users need to master high level of EEG(Electroencephalography) coding and the decoding skill, further transcode their words into bio-electricity signal restrictedly. Meanwhile, the objects might only receive and communicate messages with their very weak brain wave through the complicated procedure and a lot of time. At that time, basic transcoding work of one simple word requires 10 hours to complete, not to mention other more complex works. Everyone in the know didn’t believe Dr.Renly could finish a communication more than one phrase with his wife. But, Dr. Renly sat in the inpatient ward with all the machines for hours day after day. “We all known that ward is his true office.” Manager said. Expect renewing the carnation in the vase bedside, Dr. Renly’s daily job was watching two boards to record and try on reading those long green meander lines. He spent one year in there, until his wife passed away, he returned to his laboratory with the rest of his life.
Until now, bio-electricity signal transcoding technology have been employed in many places, such as terminal care, having communication with patient with Alzheimer’s or auxiliary therapy to mental diseases. Dr. Renly was sharply criticized by academics in biomedical area many times, some of them thoughts it’s meaningless and lack of practicability to research on communicating with people who have no consciousness. However, Dr. Renly never gave up the research on this technology, he was a speechless old man, in his world, there must be something that is much more important than the death or life on the bed. Dr. Renly passed away in peace one year ago, no one really knows whether he made it successfully talked to his beloved wife, but it is said that in the end, his wife at the near-death moment left with a beautiful smile and held his hand with the last breathe on her own.
[[The End - "If Love is Shaped"]]Through the glass and water, something else is tucked under the vase. You drew it out, it looks like a ticket...but to where?
A new message from that mystery man.
-___---_- (recent)
“Knock--, knock_-. Jinya, Read-yy to g_o?”
-___---_- (recent)
"Knoc--k, knockk-_, A_t your door. Flight to---——-_ Australia is ready to go!"
[[Back to the living room (next)]] You looked at the fridge first and the door.
You
"What are you doing? Jinya."
“Things are getting weird, it means that you are in danger!”
“Listen to me! I am always considering for you.”
[["I want to see him." (next)]]
[[Open the fridge (next)]] Your living room is still empty, dark and quite. Because of your aversion to sound and sunlight those belongs to that world, all the windows and curtain are always shut in your house. As always, nothing is changed tonight, there is no sound around your place including the other side of door. You are sensitive to the sound, clearly, on one is in your house.
But you still looked to the fridge
You
"He is just frightening you, it is your house, your fridge."
"But...If there is really something in it, like...a dead rat, like you once received in the locker at school."
Emotions were engulfing you, it's time to make the decision.
[[Back to your bedroom (next)]]
[[Open the fridge (next)]]
↶↷Green binary code continuously slid on the screen, heaven birds without wings flied cross the blue sky, dusty aubergine jelly broke on the ground and empty ark lonely drifted by the sea......All the pictures emerged in your mind...again. You lay on the bed and stared at the empty vase on the bedside cabinet, a strange thought arose, you are so quite sure that there was flower in it. Is it disappeared for some reason? or is it just the problem in your mind?
You
"Again...Jinya, stop thinking, it's useless, you are wasting your time."
You
"You need your phone, Jinya, pick it up, use it and find a chance to sleep. "
-Pick up your phone (next)