HON 303 Twine Project

One afternoon, [[you]] are playing [[soccer]] with some [[friends]]. The next day, you wake up with a hurting heel, barely able to walk. Your parents take you to the doctor, and the doctor said that you suffer from [[Ankylosing Spondylitis]].

Friends are a big part of your life. You enjoy their company and miss them when you are at home. You feel safe and belong among your friends. [[...->Prologue]] (set: $visitedPassageFriends to true)

Soccer is your favorite sport. You are a part of the soccer team in your elementary school although you are not the best player in the team. [[...->Prologue]] (set: $visitedPassageSoccer to true)

You are a 7 year-old boy living a happy life and a wonderful childhood. [[...->Prologue]] (set: $visitedPassageYou to true)

(if: $visitedPassageFriends is true and $visitedPassageSoccer is true and $visitedPassageYou is true) [ You don't know what that means. However, the doctor mentions that it will be okay as long as you take your medicine daily. You should also refrain from eating certain types of food, joining PE lessons, or doing any intense physical activity in general. Oh, before we forget, you also have to do a blood test every month. You reply: [["When will all these end?"->We don't know]] [["When can I join PE lessons again?"->We don't know]] [["When can I stop taking medicine?"->We don't know]] ]\ (else:) [ You have not explored who you are, your friends, and your hobby. [[...->Prologue]] ]

The doctor says, "Until you get better, but we don't know when that is." [[You shed tears->Mom comforts you]] [[You hold your tears->Mom takes you home]]

Mom drives you home from the doctor's office. [[...->Title Page]]

"It's okay honey," says mom. "Everything's gonna be okay. You will get better soon. I promise." She holds your hand. You know deep down that mom is just trying to comfort you. Mom continues, "Let's go home, okay? You need to go to school tomorrow." [[You take her hand and go home.->Mom takes you home]]

(set: $visitedPassageFriends to false) (set: $visitedPassageSoccer to false) (set: $visitedPassageYou to false)

=><= (live: 3s)[(t8n:"dissolve")[(css: "font-size: 200%;")[[[''The Never-Ending Battle''->Levels]]]](stop:)]

Memory Stages: 1. [[Childhood]] 2. [[Teenagehood]] 3. [[Adolescence]] [[Credits]]

This level will explore your early memories dealing with the disease as a child since you were 7. Continue? [[Yes->wake up]] [[Back to Levels->Levels]]

This level will explore your struggles dealing with the disease in middle school and high school. Continue? [[Yes->Wednesday]] [[Back to Levels->Levels]]

(set: $discipline_point = 0) This passage will explore the ways you still battle with the disease even in college as you live independently from family. Continue? [[Yes->Doctor recommendation]] [[Back to Levels->Levels]]

(live: 1s)[(t8n:"dissolve")["Come on, wake up, honey, you're gonna be late for [[school]]!" says [[Mom]].](stop:)] (live: 4s)[(t8n:"dissolve")[You reluctantly wake up and get out of bed. You put your feet firmly on the floor and try to stand up.](stop:)] (live: 7s)[(t8n:"shudder")[//Zzzz// You feel a sharp pain in your right heel.](stop:)] (live: 10s)[(t8n:"dissolve")[ What do you say to yourself? A.[["Aghh, I wish I don't have to deal with this everytime I wake up."->excuse]] B.[["Come on, have courage! It usually gets better during the day, doesn't it?"->wear shoes]] ](stop:)]

Mom is very supportive and understanding. If you need any help with anything, even [[waking up->wake up]] or [[wearing your shoes->wear shoes]], she's there for you. But, sometimes, it feels as if she is putting too much pressure on you. She really doesn't want you to miss [[school]] if you don't have to.

You used to be excited about going to school and meeting your [[friends->friends 2]], but now, you don't know how you feel about it anymore. You know that you will be physically exhausted of dealing with the pain all day. [[Mom]] can always submit an [[excuse]] to the school. Before leaving, mom asks you how you feel today. [["I'm okay, Mom. Let's go."-> ride]]

You [[wake up]] and you take a shower. The hot water feels nice, relieving the pain. You have breakfast, and now you are putting on your shoes. It is too painful and your body is too stiff to reach your feet. A.[["I wish I was more flexible and could put on my shoes myself."->excuse]] B.[["Mom, can you help me put on my shoes?"->school]]

Every morning when you [[wake up]], you wish that you don't have to go to [[school]]. You know that during bad days, [[Mom]] usually understands and is willing to write an excuse letter to miss school, even when you mention it during the ride to school. That way, you can stay at home and play computer games, not having to move a lot and experience the pain of walking. Still, you know that you have to catch up on stuff if you miss school. [["Mom, can I not go to school today? It hurts real bad."->miss school]]

You miss school today, and you spend your day at home. You decide to play games and watch YouTube all day, but you feel lonely. Mom and Dad are busy and your brother is at school. All your friends are at school too, so you can't text them. You can't help but worry about how you will make up all the assignments and materials that you missed. You don't know how you would explain to your friends the reason why you missed school without admitting that you have this disease. You have little hope that the pain will go away tomorrow. [[Levels]] | [[Repeat this memory stage->Childhood]]

Your car is approaching the school gate, Mom always says, "Remember, honey, walk with a good back posture. Keep your feet straight when you walk, don't open it outward. I love you." What do you say? "~~I can't do it mom! It hurts to do that.~~" (You can't snap at Mom. If you do, it will hurt her feelings) [["Okay mom! Bye!"->go to school]] (//while holding back your frustration//)

At [[school]], none of your friends know about your disease. You don't want to tell them either because you are embarrased about it. They won't understand even if you explain what it is to them. When they ask you why you don't participate in PE or play soccer anymore, you just say, "I'm not feeling well."

On the ride to school, you keep thinking about how you are going to get through the day with the pain in your heel. You are really defeated and you really don't think you can endure another day. If you ask Mom, she can still submit an [[excuse]] for you. Or, you can say to yourself: [["Come on, you got this! You got through yesterday, you will get through today!"->walking]]

Although you don't exactly follow Mom's advice, you successfully go about your day at school while withstanding the pain. You enjoy learning and hanging out with friends, but you wish the pain is gone. You hope for a miracle that it is not there tomorrow when you wake up. [[Levels]] | [[Repeat this memory stage->Childhood]]

It is Wednesday morning. You couldn't sleep well last night because of the pain in your knees. You remember that you have [[PE lessons]] this afternoon. You always have breakfast earlier than your family to make sure that your [[painkiller]] kicks in before you [[arrive]] at school. Sidenote: this is the last week of the semester, and you are excited for the school [[break]] next week.

The doctor now allows you to participate in PE lessons, as long as it is not a hard-contact sport such as basketball, running, soccer, etc. You have PE lessons on [[Wednesday]]. [[You ask your friends what your class is going to do today in PE.->ask PE]]

It takes the painkiller about 1 hour for it to takes in, and its effect usually only lasts for about 6 hours. So, if you take it in the morning, it will only lasts until [[noon]]. Taking half a dose allows you to do regular activities with barely any pain. The doctor suggests that you only take the amount neccessary depending on your pain level. However, you know that if you take the full dose, you will be able to painlessly join [[PE lessons]] and even participate in rigorous sports. Still, you know that Mom would be really mad if she knew that you forced yourself to play sports.

During lunch break, you feel the pain in your knee and hips coming back. Depending if you have much [[activities]] for the rest of the day, you decide whether to take the painkiller again. What day is it again today? Oh, it is [[Wednesday]]. How many painkiller do you want to take? A. [[None->0]] B. [[Half a dose->1/2]] C. [[A full dose->1]]

Activities can look like extracuriculars, outdoor activities, [[PE lessons]], or going to the mall with family after school. You can't wait for the [[break]] next week where you can stay at home.

You take the [[painkiller]] because you don't want to be seen limping in school. The walk from the school gate to your classroom is the furthest walk of the day where you will come across a lot of your friends. You want to feel confident and secure. You never want to experience [[that]] again.

You remember one after[[noon]], you were walking out of class. You did not take another dose of painkiller after lunch, and you have been sitting in class for a while, so it hurt really bad to stand up and walk. You heard a classmate jokingly ask, "Why do you waddle like a penguin?" while imitating the way you walk. What do you do? A. [[You laugh it out and continue walking.->Wednesday]] B. ~~You snap at them.~~ (It doesn't worth ruining your reputation.) You can't wait for the [[break]] where you don't have to think about this anymore.

You will be out of school next week, so you are glad that you don't have to think about [[painkiller]] or [[PE lessons]] anymore. However, for better or for worse, your family decides to travel. You are excited, yet you also worry. You know that you will have to walk a lot, and your parents know that too. So, they offer you to use a wheelchair during the trip. What do you say? A. [["I don't need it, I can handle it (with the painkiller)."->reassured]] B. [["Sure, I don't mind."->take wheelchair]]

"Sweetie, we don't want you to be in more pain when we get back. So, let's get you a wheelchair, okay?" says Mom. You know that what she says is true because that has been the case for the previous family trips. You don't have a choice but to say, [["Okay, Mom."->take wheelchair]]

You agree to use a wheelchair but you remember [[that]] incident. You worry that you may come across some of your school friends when you are travelling and be seen in a wheelchair. You know the probability is low but you can't help but overstress it.

You ask this because you want to figure out if you need to take half a dose or a full dose. "Oh, I am pretty sure we are gonna play soccer," says a friend. You know you are not supposed to participate. If you do, you almost certainly will wake up in tremendous pain the next morning. But, you really want to play. After all, it used to be your favorite sport and you don't wanna feel left out since all the other guys in your class will play. You keep thinking about it until lunch break at [[noon]].

Later that afternoon, you willingly refrain from participating in the soccer game during PE lesson. You know you made a wise decision but you wish that you could play. [[Levels]] | [[Repeat this memory stage->Teenagehood]]

You participate in the soccer game during PE lesson but only for a few minutes. The pain in your hips and knee is too much to play soccer with. Your friends ask you why you stop playing, and you answer "I'm not feeling the best today." [[Levels]] | [[Repeat this memory stage->Teenagehood]]

You participate fully in the soccer game during PE lesson. Although you do not score any goals, you play pretty well and have a lot of fun. Yet, regret immediately sinks in. You worry that you are going to wake up with excruciating pain the next day. [[Levels]] | [[Repeat this memory stage->Teenagehood]]

You feel tired, but you know you have to exercise as your doctor [[recommends->Doctor recommendation]] Today is leg day, and you successfully force yourself to go to the gym. You see [[other people]] in the gym lifting way more weights than you, and it makes you feel inferior. What do you do? A. [[You force yourself to lift more weights.->work out A]] B. [[You modestly choose a weight that you can handle.->work out B]]

You can't help but compare yourself to other people. Not only are you physically limited, but others seem to have much more time and energy in their lives. Your doctor [[recommends->Doctor recommendation]] you to have adequate [[sleep->adequate sleep]], but sometimes, you sleep early not because it's good for your health, but simply because you are too tired. Even just walking back and forth to class makes you tired, let alone exercising. You envy other guys who can work out everyday. Most of your peers stay up late, and you wish you could do that to have more [[time]] during the day to get things done.

Managing your time in college is hard. You have a part-time job, several extracurricular activities, and a bunch of classes that have labs. You do all these things while [[studying->Not stay sitting]] hard to keep your straight As and have 8 hours of [[sleep->adequate sleep]] every day. It often feels like [[other people]] have a lot more time in their days.

The day is over and it's almost bedtime for you. You want to have adequate sleep just as the doctor [[recommends->Doctor recommendation]] you to. Every night before you go to bed, Mom always texts you, "Don't forget to stretch, honey." But more often than not, you're just too tired. You have been out and about all day long, and you really want to just crash in your bed. You text Mom back, "Will do!" You know that you will feel bad if you don't do what you have said to Mom you'll do, but you are too tired and you already feel too comfortable in bed to get up. What do you do next? A. [[Spend a few minutes to stretch.->adequate sleep A]] B. [[Go to bed immediately.->adequate sleep B]]

Your health has gotten dramatically better. You don't feel the pain as often anymore. Still, your doctor recommends you several things to keep a healthy lifestyle: - Have [[adequate sleep]] with a regular schedule - Keep a [[healthy diet]] that is nutritionally balanced - Avoid too much [[stress]] - [[Not stay sitting]] for too long and stretch regularly - [[Take medicine]] regularly every morning - [[Work out]] regularly but not forcing yourself

(set: $random to (random: 1,4)) (if: $discipline_point <= 0)[ Every day is unpredictable. You may not be very disciplined these past few days, but sometimes you manage to get away with it. (if: $random < 3)[ Sadly, you do wake up today with a slight pain on your knee. You know that you have neglected your physical health and you "deserve" it. You beat yourself up for your lack of discipline. ] (else:)[Indeed, you wake up without any pain today. You feel bad for not doing a good job in keeping a healthy routine but you would rather spend your time doing schoolwork. ] ] (if: $discipline_point > 0)[ Every day is unpredictable. You may be very disciplined the last few days yet the pain may still emerge. (if: $random < 2)[ Indeed, you wake up today feeling a slight pain on your knee. You're frustrated that this still happens despite your best effort to keep a healthy lifestyle.] (else:)[Thankfully, today, you wake up without any pain. You pat yourself on the back for doing a good job of keeping a healthy routine. Usually, you are grateful for days like these, but after some time of not feeling any pain, you start to take it for granted. ] ] //Your previous choices do make a difference in the outcome.// [[Levels]] | [[Repeat this memory stage->Adolescence]]

Before college, Mom always reminded you to take your medicine as your doctor [[recommends->Doctor recommendation]]. But now, the responsibility is all on you. When you forget to take it, you overthink about what effect it may have. This puts more [[stress]] on you during the day.

You spend some [[time]] in your room doing homework. The doctor recommends you to not sit still for more than 30 minutes. It has been 45 minutes since you started, and you start to feel that your body is stiff. You know that you need to stand up and stretch as your doctor [[recommends->Doctor recommendation]], but you just want to get a bit more homework done. What do you do? A. [[Stand up and stretch.->not stay sitting A]] B. [["Maybe later" and continue doing homework.->not stay sitting B]]

You strive to be an outstanding student at school, and this already occupies most of your [[time]] in the week. You are exhausted keeping up with your academic goals, let alone keeping a healthy lifestyle on top of that. It puts even more stress on you when you can't keep up with what your doctor [[recommends->Doctor recommendation]] you to do.

You know that healthy diet makes a difference in preventing your disease from recurring. You also know that you easily gain weight if you eat too much. In the university cafetaria, you always try to go to the comfort food section because they usually serve a healthy balance of carbohydrates, proteins, and veggies. Still, the pizza and cookies look appealing. What do you do? A. [[Hold yourself back and refrain from eating pizza and cake.->healthy diet A]] B. [[Compromise and eat some pizza and cake.->healthy diet B]] You envy [[other people]] who can freely eat everything and anything without any consideration.

(set: $discipline_point = $discipline_point-1) You feel a slight pain when you lift the weights, but you are proud of yourself for doing so and withstanding the pain. You feel great after the work out, but you go about your day feeling super tired because you pushed yourself too far. You don't understand how [[other people]] can work out every day. The day is about to [[end->adequate sleep]].

(set: $discipline_point to $discipline_point+1) You have peace knowing that you work out for your health and not for pride. You feel great after the work out, but you go about your day feeling tired even though you didn't push yourself too hard. You don't understand how [[other people]] can work out every day. The day is about to [[end->adequate sleep]].

(set: $discipline_point to $discipline_point-1) You are glad that you did not grab the pizza and cake. You feel full and satisfied even without eating the pizza and cake. You feel proud of yourself for holding back. The day is about to [[end->adequate sleep]].

(set: $discipline_point to $discipline_point-1) You enjoyed the pizza and cake but you immediately feel bad right after eating it. You realize that it may impact your health the next day. You beat yourself up for it and you are [[stress]]ing about eating less sugars and more healthy foods for the rest of the day. The day is about to [[end->adequate sleep]].

(set: $discipline_point to $discipline_point+1) You are gladly willing to stop doing homework for a few minutes to stand up and stretch. Your body thank you for doing that. You return to doing homework 5 minutes later with a fresh body and mind. The day is about to [[end->adequate sleep]].

(set: $discipline_point to $discipline_point-1) You keep doing homework and you don't realize it has been more than 1 hour. You know that you should stretch, but you are tired of doing homework and you just want to watch TV, so that is what you decide to do. The day is about to [[end->adequate sleep]].

(set: $discipline_point to $discipline_point+1) You go back to bed feeling proud of yourself for spending some time to stretch. You sleep in peace knowing that you have put some effort to be disciplined today. [[...->wake up college]]

(set: $discipline_point to $discipline_point-1) You still feel troubled that you did not fufill your promise to Mom, but you can't help to just doze off to sleep because you're just exhausted. [[...->wake up college]]

This Twine game is written and developed by Jason Ang, who suffered from Ankylosing Spondylitis since childhood. While most of the stories and occurences in this game stem from his personal experience, this game is still considered a work of fiction. To learn more about Ankylosing Spondylitis in children, visit //arthritis.org/diseases/juvenile-ankylosing-spondylitis//. Copy the link above and paste it in a new window to visit the webpage. Back to [[Levels]].