This game is meant to be played on desktop devices. Sorry.
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> Welcome to the Existence Simulator. Begin existing by clicking the 'Exist' button.
You are immortal.You are 16 years and 0 days old. There are 250.00 people playing Existence Simulator.
| | Lose 1 day |
|---|---|
| | Lose 1 day |
| | -9 anxiety now, |
| | Convert 1 Missed Opportunity into some Money |
| | Convert 1 Missed Opportunity into some Knowledge |
Generates 75 Missed Opportunities. Significantly reduces anxiety per second for an amount of time based on your tolerance. If Online Learning is unlocked, generates Knowledge per second when you Read. (Once your high is over, you'll be able to re-purchase more cannabis).
Costs 20 Missed Opportunities. Makes it easier to find a job, but also increases the anxiety you generate passively. Maybe improves life later on, too?
Costs 25 Missed Opportunities if you worked hard in school, 50 if you didn't. Unlocks the ability to convert Missed Opportunities into money by Working--just like real life!
Costs 50 Missed Opportunities if you worked hard in school, 100 if you didn't. In addition to slightly higher pay per work, generates some money per second.
Costs 20 Missed Opportunities and $29. Unlocks starting a Blog. Prerequisite to learning more advanced programming.
Costs 40 Missed Opportunities and $29. Unlocks building automations for your Blog and/or Podcast.
Costs 90 Missed Opportunities and $69. Must have a Mid-Range Computer or better. Unlocks improved automations. Combined with reading about game development and theory, unlocks getting a gamedev job and writing your own games.
Costs 120 Missed Opportunities and $2500. Requires a High-Performance Computer. If you're going to get the whole world to play Existence Simulator, you'll need to live on the cutting edge of science. Take an online class by Professor Dr. Gabriella Timeknifetry, the leading expert in quantum computing manifold structures.
Costs 160 Missed Opportunities and $5000. Propel yourself from the limits of scientific knowledge and take a deep-dive into theoretical computing and software development with a class by Professor Dr. Ambassador Dutchess Kimberly Finebinaryton.
Costs 400 Missed Opportunities and $25,000. If your theories are correct, this will allow your consciousness to live on forever in a distributed, world-wide network of 'Existence Simulator' games.
Costs 30 Missed Opportunities and $29. What is siblance? How do you cut the low-end and still sound good? Everyone should know how to record good audio. One of the prerequisites to starting a Podcast.
Costs 50 Missed Opportunities and 100 Knowledge. Must know HTML and Javascript. Anxiety per second resets to zero. Working makes more money, and you generate more money per second.
Costs 50 Missed Opportunities and 200 Knowledge. Must have read about game theory and development. Must know advanced coding. Must have a mid-range computer or better. Anxiety per second reduced by 5. Working makes more money, and you generate more money per second.
Costs $49.99 and 40 Knowledge. After reading this and listening to the game theory audio book, you'll be able to start making your own games.
Costs $49.99 and 65 Knowledge. Prerequisite to writing your own games.
Costs $49.99 and 75 Knowledge. Unlocks monetizing, automating, and hiring freelancers for your blog.
Costs $59.99 and 85 Knowledge. Shows you everything you need to start a Podcast. Podcasts generate some Money and a lot of Influence.
(Must be 21+ years old) Costs $50, then you can smoke it. Smoking cannabis immediately generates 75 Missed Opportunities. Reading while high increases the amount of Knowledge you passively generate per second.
Costs $29. Play this indie game to reduce your anxiety.
Costs $49. Along with buying a computer, unlocks Online Learning, where you Read to convert Missed Opportunities into Knowledge.
Costs $129. A good microphone, a mixer, some headphones, and some software for session recording. One of the prerequisites to starting a Podcast.
Costs $1499. Doubles the Influence generated by your Podcast Episodes.
Costs $219. Connects you to the Information Superhighway. Prerequisite to unlocking Online Learning (learn new skills to make Money and eventually generate Influence). Don't forget to buy a good Wi-Fi router, too!
Costs $1,099. Unlocks ability to learn Advanced Coding, and is one of the prerequisites to Podcasting and writing your own games.
Costs $3,999. Unlocks learning Quantum Coding.
Costs $19.99. Working no longer increases anxiety. If you have a better job, make slightly more money per second.
Costs $19.99. Reduces Anxiety per second by 1, and cancels any current effects that are increasing your anxiety.
Costs $29.99. Reduces Anxiety per second by 2, and cancels any current effects that are increasing your anxiety.
Costs $39.99. Reduces Anxiety per second by 3, and cancels any current effects that are increasing your anxiety.
Costs $49.99. Reduces anxiety per second by 4, and cancels any current effects that are increasing your anxiety.
Costs $1,000.
Costs $419,000. Increases your maximum anxiety to 100,000.
Costs 1000 Knowledge, 500 Missed Opportunities, and $129. Generates 3 Anxiety per second in exchange for 1 Influence per second.
Costs 1500 Knowledge, 750 Missed Opportunities, and $129. Generates 3 Anxiety per second in exchange for 1 Influence per second.
Costs 1000 Knowledge. Must have at least 100 Influence. Generate +1 Influence per second and $15,000.
Costs 1500 Knowledge. Must have at least 550 Influence. Generate +1 Influence per second and $17,500.
Costs 2000 Knowledge. Must have at least 1,750 Influence. Generate +1 Influence per second and $45,000.
Costs 2500 Knowledge. Must have a Podcast with at least 100 episodes published. Must have at least 2,500 Influence. Generate +1 Influence per second and $80,000.
Costs 10 Missed Opportunities. Generates +1 Missed Opportunities per second and also slightly increases Anxiety per second (though we never really know by how much, do we?).
Costs 25 Missed Opportunities. Unlocks Doomscrolling (hit spacebar to instantly generate 50 Anxiety and 5 Missed Opportunities).
Costs 10 missed opportunities. Slightly increases Missed Opportunities per second. Maybe helps with anxiety, too?
Costs 45 Missed Opportunities, $20, and 100 Knowledge. You must know HTML. Blogs generate some Influence and a lot of Money with each Blog Post.
Costs 45 Missed Opportunities, $20, and 200 Knowledge. Must have at least a mid-range computer, have learned audio recording, and have purchased recording equipment. Podcasts generate some Money and a lot of Influence with each Podcast Episode.
'The Fourth Wall', an Idle Clicker Game
Click at least three times.Good! Now try to get your number up to 100. Great job! Can you make it to 1,000?
Costs 50 Knowledge. Must have read book about the business of blogging. Each Blog Post passively generates Money.
Costs 50 Knowledge. Must know Javascript and have monetized your blog. Auto-hire 1 Freelancer every second.
Costs 75 Knowledge. Must know Advanced Coding. Auto-hire up to 2 Freelancer every second.
Costs 100 Knowledge. Requires mid-range computer or better. Auto-hire up to 3 Freelancer every second. If you've written a game, Blog Posts now generate some Influence.
Costs 50 Knowledge. Must know HTML and have read book about the business of podcasting. Unlocks ability to hire Freelancers and to build automations. Freelancers convert $25 into one Podcast Episode. Passively generates Money per second based on number of Episodes published.
Costs 90 Knowledge. Must know Advanced Coding. Auto-hire 1 Freelancer every second. +25% Influence from Podcast Episodes.
Costs 120 Knowledge. Auto-hire up to 2 Freelancer every second. +25% Influence from Podcast Episodes.
Costs 150 Knowledge. Must know Advanced Coding. Auto-hire up to 3 Freelancer every second. +25% Influence from Podcast Episodes.
Costs 100 Knowledge and 100 Missed Opportunities. Must have read about game theory and about game development. Podcast Episodes and Blog Posts generate 25% more Money and Influence.
Costs 200 Knowledge and 200 Missed Opportunities. Blog Posts and Podcast Episodes generate 25% more Influence. Prerequisite to writing 'Existence Simulator,' an idle clicker game that will take over the world.
This is it: your magnum opus. Build the gravity-defying, expectation-satisfying, world-renowned idle clicker game 'Existence Simulator.' Costs 300 Knowledge and 300 Missed Opportunities. Unlocks Worldwide Players. Blog Posts and Podcast Episodes generate 25% more Influence.
Costs $50,000. A team of experts will study the worldwide playerbase of Existence Simulator to develop a set of recommendations for generating player growth.
Costs 20,000 Knowledge, 20,000 Influence, and $250,000. +100 Influence per second. Slowly but surely, everyone on Earth will play Existence Simulator.
Costs 10,000 Knowledge, 10,000 Influence, and $225,000. Generate +5 Influence per second. The world has evolved, and not everyone needs to work all the time. Help pass a law that provides a basic income safety net for people to take care of themselves and their family without forcing them to participate in an exploitative labor system because there's no other way to pay your bills.
Costs 2,500 Knowledge, 1,750 Influence, and $25,000. Generate +5 Influence per second. Help pass a law that livestreams Existence Simulator games all hours of the day and night.
Costs 3,000 Knowledge, 3,000 Influence, and $50,000. Generate +5 Influence per second. Help pass a law that requires K-12 public schools to teach idle games every year.
Costs 4,000 Knowledge, 4,000 Influence, and $75,000. Generate +5 Influence per second. Help pass a law that requires colleges to officially recognize idle games as an official sports, and provides funding for team jerseys and computer cafes to practice in.
Costs 5,000 Knowledge, 5,000 Influence, and $100,000. Generate +5 Influence per second. Help pass the Baby Existence Simulator Trainer (BEST) Law, which provides free, single-button idle games for babies to prepare them to play Existence Simulator.
Costs 6,000 Knowledge, 6,000 Influence, and $125,000. Generate +5 Influence per second. Many people can't play Existence Simulator all day because they need to feed their families. Help pass a law that provides free food rations to anyone who plays Existence Simulator.
Costs 7,000 Knowledge, 7,000 Influence, and $150,000. Generate +5 Influence per second. Many people can't play Existence Simulator all day because they need to make more money to afford childcare, a viscious cycle of of needless expenses that keeps them in poverty. Help Pass a law that provides free childcare for anyone who regularly plays Existence Simulator.
Costs 8,000 Knowledge, 8,000 Influence, and $175,000. Generate +5 Influence per second. Many people can't play Existence Simulator all day because they need to make money so they can afford healthcare, a viscious cycle of of needless expenses that keeps them in poverty. Help pass a law that provides full healthcare reimbursement via pre-approved rebates for citizens playing Existence Simulator.
Costs 9,000 Knowledge, 9,000 Influence, and $200,000. Generate +5 Influence per second. Many people can't play Existence Simulator all day because there's nowhere that offers affordable rent, so they have to work overtime and multiple jobs just to afford basic housing -- a viscious cycle of of needless effort that keeps them in poverty. Help pass a law that provides housing stipends for all citizens playing Existence Simulator.